Category Archives: style

A Candy Pink Dress And A Whole New Silhouette


Hello, again! It me, your intrepid narrator, hanging out with a bunch of really old rocks, and wearing one of my favourite dresses. It was from Pinup Girl Clothing’s Deadly Dames collection, but it looks like they stopped making it. You can buy the skirt as a separate though!

I can’t believe it’s already September, and summer is officially over. It’s grey outside, it rained overnight, and we’re heading into cozy times. (I’ve been swaddling myself in a baby pink cardigan — this one! — like it’s my job.) But these photos remind me of this summer and all the silliness that went down. Oh what a time it was it was, oh what a time it was.


Look at them there rocks!


It has been really fun to start experimenting with new silhouettes and try out different things stylistically. For the last decade, I’ve been wearing a uniform of sorts, and it almost always boiled down to a t-shirt with an A-line skirt and ankle boots.

But over the past year, my body has completely changed. (These photos were taken just over a year ago, for contrast.) My breast augmentation has played a big role in that, but it’s also been over a year now since I stopped eating sugar. My workouts are totally different too: I use my whole body and I think about fitness in a whole new way. (Thanks, genius boyfriend.) So that has led to me trying new looks, and let me tell you, it made getting dressed up this summer so much more enjoyable!

I’ve been investigating more form-fitting styles (hand me that bandage skirt!), rocking a pair of black denim cut-offs on the regular, and even wearing booty shorts to the gym! WHAT?! This time last year, I would have shrivelled up and died at the mere thought.

But the thing I’m discovering is that we can only smash our fears when we face them. When you wear booty shorts in public and no one dies, you realise it’s not a big deal after all. The only “big deal” is in your head. And that, my friend, you have the power to change.


I’ve been getting so much joy out of dressing up lately, and it feels amazing. I’m not totally sure what my Fall/Winter style direction will be… But I’m excited to think about it!

Love always,

Photos by Made U Look Photography.

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Even Cowgirls Get The Blues



he alternate title for this post should probably just be “I Love Bodysuits” because it feels like a meaningful theme in my life lately. If it isn’t a bodysuit, I probably don’t want to wear it. It’s safe to say that I am obsessed with the damn things.

This outfit is a perfect case in point. When I posted an outtake of it on Instagram, a lot of people thought it was a dress because it looked so seamless. Success! No one will ever say that about a t-shirt worn with a skirt. It just doesn’t look the same. And sure, when it comes to the big picture and the grand scheme of things, the “smoothness” of an outfit is not a life-or-death situation… But it always feels better when your look is on point.


Ribbons around the neck = a big yes from me. I haven’t written about my Style Direction for a long time, but I’m definitely due for an update. My style has evolved a lot in the past year, and it’s really fun to experiment with new shapes (like more fitted garments) and colours (baby pink, for example). Here are some of my old Style Direction pieces if you’re in a bit of a sartorial rut (they might inspire you!): Stepford Witch (2015), Eccentric Pop (2013), Day Tripping Darling (2012), Psychedelic Ladies Who Lunch (2010).

I’m getting excited just thinking about writing about my new Style Direction. Okay, okay, I’ll do it! Soon!


I’m wearing…

A black straw hat from Forever 21. Whenever I go into one of their stores, I just cannot resist their hat collection. It’s like a sickness.
Fendi ribbon around my neck. I bought some sunglasses at the boutique in Vegas and the ribbon was used to tie the bag. I decided to repurpose it, and now this ribbon has actually gotten more wear than the sunglasses themselves! Oops. It’s like how kids like the box the toy comes in more than the toy itself, you know?
Black bodysuit by New Look, purchased through ASOS
Black skater skirt from H&M, although I got it at Buffalo Exchange
Dr Marten Darcie boots which are absolutely on their last legs. There are holes in the heels now. I need to throw them away but it’s hard to get rid of clothing that served you so well!



These girls! I just came back from YET ANOTHER trip to Vegas with them, and it was even more fun than the last one. We had such a good damn time!


Awwwww. Cutest babes out.

Love and bodysuits,

Photos by Made U Look Photography.

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Road Runners And Red Rocks


Driving out to Red Rock in Nevada is an incredible experience. It’s like stepping inside a Road Runner cartoon. I was gobsmacked as I stared out the window. I thought that iconic landscape which I had only seen in cartoons, full of wild rock formations and ACME anvils, had come from someone’s imagination. Nope! Huge swathes of America look exactly like that!

Red Rock is 15 miles outside of Las Vegas, a pretty short drive from the Strip. (I recommend stopping for In-N-Out burgers on the way, like we did.) The rock formations are 250 million years old which is such a long span of time that I cannot even begin to get my head around it. The colours are incredible: bright rusty reds, delicious dusty pinks, and creamy taupes as far as the eye can see.

Anyway, get ready, because this is… Drumroll… An outfit post! It has been so long since I did one of these! I hope you enjoy it.


Crammed into our friend Christina’s car, Shauna, Kat and I watched incredulously as the scenery around us changed.

We showed up at Red Rock Canyon around 3pm, when the light was just starting to change and shadows were cast around the canyon. It was perfect. It was also full of families, so we had to crawl into the back of Christina’s tiny yellow Volkswagen Bug to get changed, and I’m sure I flashed a bunch of people and scarred some children for life. The story behind the story is always so funny!

I’ve been to Las Vegas more times than I can count. I love it there: the excess, the history, the encouragement to be your loudest and most vulgar self is deeply appealing to me. I can understand why some people dislike it, but I’m not one of them. Even so, getting off the Strip and seeing something different was magnificent. I’m a little bit obsessed. Getting out into nature feels so good to me. It’s deeply restorative. Do you think I can talk the girls into making another pilgrimage when we go back?!


This dress is by Guess and I have gotten so much wear out of it already.

I had literally never been into a Guess store until this trip. The three of us were walking through Planet Hollywood when I saw the dress above on a mannequin in the window. I walked a few more paces, then said, “Wait,” and walked inside. I am obsessed with this dress and the way it fits. In fact, I loved it so much that a month later, in Miami, I went into another Guess store and bought jeans, cut-offs, and an olive green jumpsuit. I guess (ha!) I just became a Guess fan. Better late than never!


Can you believe how long my hair is getting?! The secret to my success (haha) is these gummies. I take 5 a day. I swear that they are the sole cause of my hair’s exponential growth, and they’re definitely helping out my skin and nails too.


My makeup is by the excellent Blanca who — at the time — was working at the Venetian Sephora, but she’s moving over to the Fashion Show Mall when the new Sephora opens. She is so lovely and she does the best makeup! Love her. We’re going back in a couple of weeks and I will definitely be bothering her! Anyway, if you’re in Vegas, go and see her to make your face beautiful!


Can I get a ride?

Love and rocks,

Photos by Made U Look Photography.

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Strawberry Milkshakes And Adventures In New York City


Desert goth adventures in Nevada.


ello from an overcast New York City. After teasing us with soaring temperatures, the city has cooled back down and it’s back to leather jackets for this girl. Le sigh! I’m so ready for it to be summer! Bring on the heat!

I just came back from Las Vegas, where I spent 5 days with Kat and Shauna, otherwise known as my original partners in crime. We had an incredible trip, but that’s a story for another time. Here’s what I’ve been up to lately…


We currently have five planets in retrograde and Mercury is just one of them. Oh my. Thankfully, I was invited to a Mercury recovery lounge at The Alchemist’s Kitchen, where they had teas, tinctures, herbal lollipops, and an incredible tarot card reader who gave me one of the most illuminating readings I’ve had in ages. It was awesome! The event is on every day until Mercury goes direct, so you should definitely check it out!

This has really been such an intense month. As a Sagittarius Moon and Rising, Saturn has been all over my chart… And Saturn is known as the hard task-master. Disciplinarian Daddy energy. It’s good for you but it feels rough. I have been really putting myself through so much emotional torment, but I think it’s all building towards something good. At least, I hope it is! If you’re a subscriber to Mystic Medusa’s site — and you’re a Sagittarius Sun, Moon or Rising, comme moi — you should definitely read this. For example: “Resist grinching yourself over the past. This is a rather grotty side-effect of Saturn in your sign. Like a non-stop forensic audit. But pull yourself up with a swift, sharp “is this productive?”” I love that. IS THIS PRODUCTIVE? Good question to pull yourself out of an emotional quagmire!

Five things I love so much right now:
Views From The Six, Drake’s new album. It has been on repeat for weeks.
 Doing something for my mind and body every morning, namely meditating and doing a miniature workout. Try these: Tess Whitehurst’s Aura Cleansing Meditation and Patricia Moreno’s 5 minute Intensati workout!
Having the same dream as my friend Colin! Psychic twinsies!
Buying tickets to see Louis CK at Madison Square Garden! AHHHHH! He’s my favourite comedian ever and I could just cry with excitement. Even better? We’re going the day before my birthday! Happy early birthday to me. So so happy.
Seeing my book for sale at Enchantments, my favourite witch store in the city! It was seriously one of the highlights of my day. The owner told me she bought all of the remaining stock from the distributor and they had already sold half of them in a couple of days. So exciting!

So it has been a tricky month on the emotional side, but it’s not all bad. I’ve been having plenty of fun, too! I’ve been taking outfit photos in my living room mirror lately. It reminds me of those old outfit posts I used to do (way, way, way back in the day), except it’s less time-consuming! Hahah. I may not be fashion blogging anymore, but DAMN do I love to dress up! Plus, having these photos is so helpful for those days when I just don’t know what to wear, and need a little inspiration!


T-shirt from Forever 21 (hahah I mean “Forever 32″), Femme Fatale Pencil Skirt by Black Milk Clothing, and my trusty Schott Perfecto. I love grey with baby pink. What a luscious combo.


I wore this on a visit to Hay House (my publisher): dress by Jonathan Saunders, purple turban (bought it on Amazon!) and ye olde leather jacket.


I’m obsessed with this Aaliyah/Anthrax shirt by Sex & Death (it was a gift, thanks Garnett!). I’ve had this purple/pink wrap skirt for a year or two now and it never gets any less delightful to wear. And I paired it with Uniqlo Heattech (because it is still BRRRRR here) and my leather jacket, plus tights and new suede ankle boots by Joie. (They’re cute and comfortable. Bonus!)


The hat is from Forever 21 and the dress is by Killstar. I had been meaning to buy it for ages but was on the fence. I’m so glad I did — it’s really fun to wear and I swear, I have never had more compliments on an outfit in my entire life! The only problem is that it’s a maxi-dress with no split in the back or up the side. This is pure craziness since it means you have to literally hobble your way down the street! (I made a video of me doing exactly that on Snapchat, hahah.) I’m going to have to get it altered, but that’s okay. A small price to pay for an epic dress!


I’ve been getting some crazy cool mail recently. This is a package from Tiffany Pratt, who helped me decorate Darling HQ and is one of the most inspiring, colourful and fabulous women I’ve ever met. She hand-painted the parcel she sent me — no one has that much attention to detail! Her book, This Can Be Beautiful, comes out soon, and you should pre-order it if you know what’s good for you! (I got a sneak peek. It is SO GOOD.)


A card I pulled at the start of the weekend. Very appropriate. It was totally a few days of grabbing an opportunity and running with it, and using the spark to create more.

My friend Chloe — who now lives in Florida and works for Disney as a photographer! — came to town, and we went on an adventure. Most of our silliness was captured on Snapchat (my username is gala-darling)!  It was such a good day: we took an Uber to the Bronx for the Jonathan Adler warehouse sale, where we rubbed ourselves on candy-coloured couches and loaded up on awesome things. I bought new bedding (Malachite), a huge Eyelashes canister, and a little Dolls canister, and my total was $95! SCORE. Chloe bought two sconces which we promptly shipped back to Florida. His sale happens once a year, and you should definitely go to the next one if you’re in town!


This purple velvet chair was really calling my name. I felt like I was sitting in a box of chocolates. All our houses should feel like that! I was wearing a Missoni turban (I went a bit nuts last year in Florence), a grey t-shirt, a black maxi-skirt by Alice & Olivia, and my Schott Perfecto leather jacket.


This velvet couch was a real temptress, too. My pink bucket bag is by Kate Spade… And I love it.

After the Bronx, we came back to the East Village for frozen Nutella Fitzgeralds at The Bean, and a browse around Flower Power…IMG_4597

Flower Power is legitimately like the witch’s kitchen of your wildest childhood dreams: packed to the gills with herbs and flowers, lotions and potions, and staffed by kind and helpful people. It’s tiny but it packs a punch — visit and you’ll see what I mean!

Next stop? Juicy Lucy, where Chloe got juice and we both bought hot pink fake moustaches, then wore them downtown. We wandered all over the Lower East Side, discovering parks, meeting dogs, and stopping in little plant shops…


Before we reached our final destination, Magic Jewelry in Chinatown, where we got (almost identical) aura photos.


And then that night I went out to karaoke with some friends and saw Alber Elbaz walking down Second Avenue, but that is a story for another time!


In other news, Kat and Shauna and I booked ourselves a trip to the Amalfi Coast! We’re staying in an old convent built into the cliffside — Grand Hotel Convento di Amalfi — and I can’t wait to wear big hats every day and get a tan. Meow!

Radical Self Love Coven has been going so well. There are 300 witch babies in the program, which blows my stripey socks off, and everyone has been doing spells, reporting back on their progress, meeting up in cities across the world, and making SO MUCH MAGIC! I’m so excited about our community and the massively positively environment we’ve created together. It warms my sparkly heart!


Okay. We NEED to talk about this dress. It’s the Downtown Dame dress by Pinup Girl Clothing in faux pink leather (aka vinyl). I saw it on a very sassy girl on Instagram and then obsessively stalked the site until the dress came back in stock.

I had no idea about sizing but took a gamble and went for Small, which turned out to be perfect. (You need to size up a little bit because it has veeeeery little give.) I also thought it might be hell to wear because it’s plastic, but thankfully, it is beautifully made and fully lined, so hopefully I won’t be a sticky mess come summertime. Anyway. I am obsessed!


That belt! Lord above.


I’m so happy with my new wrist tattoo! I got it as a matching tattoo with Kat in London, and it was done by Keely Rutherford at Jolie Rouge. She’s ace!

I really feel like a strawberry milkshake in this dress. Shimmy shimmy ya, shimmy ya, shimmy yay. I took it to Las Vegas for a photoshoot in the desert and it felt like all was right in the world… You know?

Love always,

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All I Wanted For Christmas Was A Boob Job… So I Got One!


Trigger warning: This article contains many references to body image, weight and body modification, as well as (censored) images of my boobies. If this makes you uncomfortable or brings up negative emotions for you, please don’t torture yourself by reading any further!

I got myself an early Christmas present this year: breast augmentation. I went from a 32B to a 32D (maybe a 32DD once they drop) in the span of an hour, and I can say without a shadow of a doubt that it is some of the best money I’ve ever spent. I am absolutely delighted with the results.

This has been a big year for me. I got a divorce. I got a book deal. I was single, I dated, I got into a relationship. I’ve been actively reclaiming myself, my life, my body, and my sexuality. It has been miraculous, challenging and overwhelming. It has also been the best year of my life.

Since overcoming my eating disorder ten years ago, my love and appreciation for my body has only grown. I am not ashamed or embarrassed to say that I think my body is beautiful. I don’t just write about radical self love, I live it. I take good care of myself: I eat nutritious food (with joy and no sense of deprivation), I exercise, I barely drink, I don’t smoke. 95% of the time, I feel awesome when I leave the house, and I’m totally comfortable in my skin. I never hated my B cups, and in fact, I never really thought about their size until this summer.

The tipping point was when I decided to stop eating sugar. I was truly addicted to it, and would eat at least one chocolate bar a day. I had read with horror the research that says eating sugar slows collagen production, which means you lose elasticity in your skin and you’ll see the effects of aging faster. My relationship with sugar was deep and psychologically complex: I noticed that when I felt unhappy, I’d go for something sweet, and it would make me feel good for about 20 seconds before I was right back where I started. Quitting sugar made me realise how much I used sugar to stop me from feeling things I didn’t want to feel. Without sugar as a crutch, I was forced to actually feel my feelings, which has been a major growth experience for me. In addition to having more energy, feeling happier and less moody, I lost about ten pounds over the course of a few months. As someone with low body fat anyway — it wavers around 11% — a whole lot of it came out of my boobs, which didn’t have much to give in the first place!

I wasn’t embarrassed about how I looked, but I thought I could look better. I have broad shoulders and I thought a bump up in the boob department might make me look more well-proportioned. Unlike everything else on my body that I have been able to improve via good eating and working out, breasts are — unfortunately — the only thing you can’t enlarge through diet or exercise.

So, this summer I started thinking about getting a boob job. I did a bunch of research on RealSelf — which is like Yelp for cosmetic surgery — and fairly impulsively, made an appointment to see a surgeon for a consultation.

My surgeon was unbelievably nice and the consultation blew me away. I stood in front of a machine where six cameras took simultaneous photos of my chest and torso, and then, on a screen, my doctor showed me what I’d look like with different sized and shaped implants. It was incredible and the results looked really realistic. I was so impressed! It was shocking but wonderful to see what implants would look like on my frame, because even though I’d thought about it a lot, it was very hard for me to visualise what it would actually look like. The consultation removed all doubt.

You can’t go into a surgeon and say “I’d like to be a D cup”, but you can make an approximation. Implants are based on cubic centimetres, and every 150cc will bump you up about one cup size. I took some boobspiration photos with me (!!!), and based on those, my surgeon showed me a bunch of options.


That’s how I looked at the time on the left, as compared with a 320cc round implant, viewed from the front. I thought it looked amazing, but I couldn’t really tell how much bigger it would look in, say, clothing.


When I first saw this, my eyes almost burst out of my head! This looks SO much bigger. This is the same size implant as the one above — 320cc — but viewed from the side it looks much larger, and gives you more context.


This is a 370cc implant, but this time, it’s a teardrop shape. Clearly it’s bigger than the 320cc, but even though the shape of the teardrop versus the round is subtle, the fullness in the bottom of the teardrop implant sticks out from my torso way too much.


Hooooooooooly shit! Again, the front view alone does NOT give you the full story! Here’s another view of the 370cc implant, except this time, you’re getting my view of me looking straight down at them.


This is a 380cc round implant. It’s the same shape as the first image, just bigger. I loved how these looked on my frame, and thought it was pretty much perfect.

These are the only photos I took from the consult, but we went through lots of different options. We discussed the pros and cons of saline vs silicone, as well as low, medium and high profile (essentially how much the implant “sticks out” at the top of the breast). Even though teardrop implants can look more natural, since they’re fuller at the bottom, they didn’t work on my frame. My doctor told me that I’d be constantly hitting them with my arm and it would drive me crazy. He also told me that the most common complaint he got from patients afterwards was that they wished they’d gone bigger.

With all of this in mind, I walked 50 blocks to brunch with three of my best friends, thinking intently the whole way. By the time I had reached Cafe Mogador, I had basically made up my mind that I was going to get it done. A few weeks later, I spoke to one of my astrologer friends about a good date for surgery (haha!), then called the office and booked in for November the 17th. Auspiciously, that date also happened to be RuPaul’s birthday. I thought this was an excellent sign!



My surgery was booked for 8am on a Tuesday. I woke up early that morning, and used an antibacterial cleanser all over my body. I was even instructed to use it to clean out my belly-button with a Q-tip. I wasn’t allowed to wear deodorant, moisturiser, or any make-up. I had been told to wear something that buttoned in the front, so I headed uptown in a car in a green flannel shirt that I’d steamed the wrinkles out of the night before (hello, Virgo), black sweatpants and my blanket coat.

I was amazed to find that I wasn’t nervous or anxious at all about getting the procedure. I showed up to the surgeon’s office early, signed some forms, changed into a paper gown and a robe and sat on an examination chair, messaging my friends on my phone. As the clock edged ever closer to my surgery time, I felt little flutters of nerves — I remember letting out about 3 big deep breaths — but beyond that, the abject fear I was anticipating never surfaced.

My surgeon appeared and we made light conversation while he marked up my breasts. Soon, my nurse came in and invited me into the neighbouring room. It was chilly. Dr Shafer asked me, “What kind of music do you like?”, and when I said, “Hip-hop,” Usher’s Yeah! quickly filled the room!

I climbed onto the table and lay down. My nurse pointed a little heater at me underneath the blanket and covered me up. My anesthesiologist asked what I did for a living, and then we discussed his daughter’s Masters in Poetry and how writers have to hustle if they want to make it work. He told me he was going to give me some Propofol, inserted the IV which hurt for about half a millisecond, and then said, “Soon you’re going to feel a warm sensation up your arm. Now, just so you know, you might have vivid dreams. Maybe you’ll dream about your next book!” I laughed and said, “That’s an awesome intention to set.”

The next thing I remember was my anesthesiologist saying, “Hello. Move over here onto this bed.” I wriggled onto the bed beside me with the help of the nurse and I suppose they wheeled me into the next room, but I don’t recall that. I opened my eyes at some point and my nurse offered me water and Saltines, and told me to rest for an hour. I kind of wanted to sleep but I wasn’t really tired, and I didn’t feel groggy at all (Propofol is the truth!), so I asked for my phone and started texting people.

My nurse asked me where I was at on a pain scale of 1-10, and I said 3.5. She asked if I wanted to take the OxyContin or if I just wanted Tylenol Extra Strength, and I opted for the Tylenol. I wasn’t in much pain at all. Mostly, my chest felt tight and a little achy, but nothing terribly dramatic.

After an hour of observation, my boyfriend arrived to take me home. He made me soup and then fed it to me, which made me laugh so hard. After about an hour, I decided to take some OxyContin. I didn’t really want it — and I didn’t want to be all loopy or out of it — but my nurse had stressed the importance of taking it before I felt pain, and that ache was starting to come back. We split the pill in half and I took it, and then an hour later I took the rest. It didn’t make me feel nuts at all, it just alleviated the pain and made me feel a bit sleepy, which was a relief.

I had moved my projector into the bedroom the night before so I was ready for epic laziness! My boyfriend lifted me into position in bed because I couldn’t really use my arms to maneuver around. They say you’ll need someone to look after you for 24 hours after your surgery, and it’s true. Your movement is pretty limited. We watched Bill Burr stand-up, then Iris, then I Love You, Man, and fell asleep around 11.30pm.


The day after my surgery I took it easy. My boyfriend and I meditated together before he went to work, and I mostly stayed in bed. I took some Valium as a muscle relaxant just to take the edge off, and dozed on and off all day, with a few breaks to walk around my house and keep my circulation up. I ate well, drank plenty of fluids, watched some movies, and just relaxed in general.

The next day, Thursday, I was back to normal life. I was on Periscope at 12.30pm, went for a walk, and was — for all intents and purposes — on track again. Every day, my chest became less tight and I had more range of motion. (Two weeks after surgery, I was able to do body weight exercise, and I returned to my normal exercise routine — using resistance — yesterday.)

The week of the surgery, I met up with one of my best friends. After he’d examined the doctor’s fine handiwork (!!!), we sat down and he asked me what had motivated me to get the surgery.

“Did anyone ever make fun of you or bully you or whatever?” he asked.

“No, no one ever said anything negative about my boobs,” I replied. “And I think that’s one of the really interesting things about my approach to this surgery: I did it totally from a place of self-love, not from a place of self-loathing. I never hated my boobs or felt deficient or ‘less of a woman’ because I was a small B cup. Once I got past my eating disorder years, I’ve loved my body. In fact, I have been in an ongoing love affair with my body ever since I started working out and I saw what my body is really capable of. Even though surgery is expensive and it has its complications, to me it’s really no different to working out, wearing make-up, getting a blow-out, or wearing designer shoes. It’s about transforming to match the vision of myself I have in my head. Why not look the way you really want to look?”


I think it’s a common misconception that people get surgery (or Botox, go to the gym, wear make-up, get tattoos, etc.) because of some deep-seated self-loathing. Sure, some people go under the knife for extreme reasons. Some people will never be satisfied with what they see in the mirror, no matter what changes they make to their external appearance. Surgery gets a bad rap because when it goes bad, it really goes bad, and it’s excitedly splashed all over the tabloids. But there are so many normal, everyday people who have minimal procedures that they’re thrilled with. People get their noises straightened, tummies tucked, breasts enlarged or reduced, and most casual onlookers would never have a clue.

My philosophy is this. If it makes you feel good, and your intentions are clean, do it, but — and it’s a big caveat! — you have to love yourself first! Making a change to your external appearance won’t do anything if you haven’t done the internal work. If you can approach any kind of enhancement from a place of radical self love, you’re much more likely to be pleased with the results. But if you dislike who you are at your core, getting a boob job won’t make you any happier, you’ll simply displace your disappointment. You’ll probably start obsessing about your thighs instead.

“My idea of feminism is self-determination, and it’s very open-ended: every woman has the right to become herself, and do whatever she needs to do.” — Ani DiFranco

I don’t believe body modification and radical self love are mutually exclusive. After all, I get dressed up every day, I have half-sleeve tattoos, and I’m a member of Sephora’s VIB Rouge (hahah). To me, radical self love is about adorning yourself and adoring yourself in any way you see fit. It’s about experimentation and play, turning your body into art. No judgment. Do your thing!

The pressure on women to look and behave a certain way is massive, and we can never please everyone. You’ll always be too tall, too short, too fat, too thin, too feminine, too masculine, and the list goes on. You have to live your life for yourself. You have the power to define what is beautiful and desirable in your own mind. I don’t have a “perfect” nose but I love it and have no plans to change it, even though most cosmetic surgeons would probably start there.

A lot of women feel shame around the fact that they want to change their appearance, and that’s bullshit. If you have the means, why not? Some people love to judge women for getting cosmetic surgery, but what someone does with their body is no one else’s business. To me, it’s in the same category as pro-lifers: get the fuck out of here with that shit, and stop assuming you know what is best for other people.




In the end, we went for round, silicone, moderate profile, 375cc implants, inserted under the muscle. I think the size is perfect and even though they’ll look a little different in a few months time when they drop down, I’m really enjoying this stage.

In my opinion — which, let’s face it, is the only one that matters — it looks great. I couldn’t be happier with the result: it has totally surpassed my expectations. I had no bruising and practically zero pain. I feel ecstatic, really sexy and more feminine. I’m able to wear a bunch of dresses that I could never fill out before, that previously sat dejected in my closet! My posture is much better and I feel more confident in a subtle way.


Plus, going bra-shopping the other day was one of the most fun experiences of my life! Oh my god. So good. I can’t wait to shop for bikinis to take to Mexico. Holy shit!


Radical self love is about doing what’s right for you, and making choices from a clear and centered place. It’s not about pleasing others or fearing their reactions. Getting surgery doesn’t make you shallow or superficial, it doesn’t mean you’re not a feminist, it doesn’t mean shit. Just like the decision to get married (or not), have babies (or not), run for president (or not), it’s your life, and you don’t have to justify it to anyone.

I have no shame or regret about what I’ve done — just the opposite, in fact. If you have any questions, ask me on Instagram and I’ll do my best to answer them!

Oh, and I’ll leave you with this.


Love always,

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