How To Keep Your Head Above Water (iCiNG Podcast #001 Transcript)

[ 1 April 2007, 14:41 ]

I just received a request to post a transcript of my first podcast…

Gala Darling – iCiNG Podcast #001. (MP3)
Click the link to listen now, or right-click to save & listen later!

“Hello! You’re listening to iCiNG podcast number one, & I’m your host, Gala Darling. You can keep up with what I’m doing at my website, galadarling.com, where I obsessively document my discoveries about fashion, style, aesthetics & living a better life.

“Since this is my first podcast, I just want to say thank you for tuning in! I’m really excited about moving into audio as part of the iCiNG project. It’s so cool to create something which is portable in a way that my website & videos just aren’t. It’s quite amazing to think that there could be people listening to this in their car in Spain, or on the subway in New York, or on a beach in Tonga. I’m thrilled that you have chosen to let my voice into your head — as it were — so thank you! I hope to provide you with some sweetness.

“This podcast is about staying above water, & how to cheer yourself up when nothing else seems to be working. I recently went through a pretty intense period of writer’s block & apathy, & it was really awful. I know how hard it can be, & hopefully listening to this podcast will give you some ideas to help keep your chin up.

“The changing of the seasons is happening as I speak. I know this because I’ve been wearing a hoodie all day, when this time last week I had the air-conditioning on full-blast while I worked. This means that those of us in the southern hemisphere are starting to experience cold, blustery weather, while you people up north are seeing the first signs of spring. I’m almost jealous, but we had an incredible summer here in Melbourne, Australia, so I’m okay with it. I forgive you!

“Weird things happen when the seasons change, though. It seems like more relationships break up than normal, usually prolific people lose their creative drive & ambition, everyone seems to sleep more than usual & pedestrians can no longer walk in a straight line, causing lots of near-misses on the sidewalk. The whole thing is bizarre. Really, it’s a time of emotional turmoil, & it can be very odd & unsettling to experience.

“That’s why I thought I would talk a little bit about how to bolster your mood when things seem to be getting you down. Unfortunately I can’t make you any promises that it is going to be the perfect solution, but maybe if you try a strange combination of things, it will be the magic answer — keys will turn, locks will break & you will feel like yourself again.

“Sad days are awful. It’s such a waste of time, & all that wallowing just makes you feel worse. The more you focus on it, the bigger it becomes. It’s a nasty cycle. I think a pretty big part of getting over the angst is accepting that it’s there. I’m sure you have a busy life, like almost everyone else I know, & a lot of the time it seems like we just don’t have TIME to be sad, depressed or stressed out. If you give yourself permission to feel crappy, it can help a lot. Try not to worry about things you need to do or obligations you need to fill. Everything is workable, but put yourself first right now.

“Try having a really good shower or bath. Close the door, light candles, use as many deliciously-scented powders, potions & bubblebaths as you possibly can, & relax. Breathe deeply & slowly. Sometimes all you need is a good dose of alone time, & the bathroom is a good place to get it.

“Go for a walk with your headphones on. You could take a camera & make it your mission to take three good photographs, but you may not need that. Sometimes, just being out & alone in a city at night can be great. You can window-shop all you like, look at the people passing by, drink coffee, browse the movie listings, sit in bookshops devouring their magazine section, look in asian supermarkets at the great confectionary packaging, or have a meal at your favourite place. Just take your time & do whatever you want.

“Buy a Moleskine (or other lustworthy journal or notebook) & a great pen — I like black ink pens — & start writing. Make plans. What do you want to be doing in five years, ten years, fifty years? You can be as outrageous as you want, no one else needs to ever read it. Maybe you want to be like Andy Warhol or have your own media empire. Write it down, dream about it, make plans, believe it can happen! Get excited about your life! If you’re not immediately enthusiastic, try, try again. It will come to you.

“Go to a cake shop or bakery & buy something which looks beautiful. Eat pickled onions or pate on toast or Whopper burgers, anything that is comforting to you. My mother always has lime marmalade on toast for breakfast, which as a child I thought was absolutely disgusting, but it is now one of my insane weaknesses. I always feel better when I eat it, so I keep lime marmalade in the cupboard at all times, just in case.

“I have to admit that I have a secret love of terrible, trashy television. I don’t mean Sex & The City — which I consider to be perfect in every way conceivable — I’m talking about horrific shows like The Hills, The Osbournes, America’s Next Top Model, & E! Entertainment Specials about Mary-Kate & Ashley Olsen. Sometimes I like to watch Daria, which isn’t as trashy, but works well when you really need a dose of good teenage angst. My favourite thing ever is to watch them on my laptop in bed, with lots of pillows & some kind of nutritious food. Ice-cream with chocolate sauce, for example.

“Buy terrible, embarrassing magazines or tidy your house with some really good music going. Get lots of sleep. Indulge in a little retail therapy — it’s tacky, but it works. Get a makeover at a department store cosmetics counter. Split a huge ice-cream sundae with one of your best friends. Hold hands with someone, anyone you like. Go for a good, long drive (again, with good music). Watch horror movies, especially the ones which manage to somehow straddle the border between terrifying & embarrassingly awful. Get dressed up & go out for breakfast, either with someone or alone. A good eggs benedict can solve a lot of problems. Get some exercise!

“Try going dancing alone, if you can muster up the courage. When I was living by myself in Auckland, New Zealand, I lived right in the centre of town (the corner of Victoria & Queen Street, for locals), & sometimes it would be 2am on a Sunday morning & all I really wanted to do was listen to some good hiphop & dance for a while. I would throw some shoes on, run downstairs to this bar called Fu, smile winningly at the bouncer, & go dance. I rarely did it with the intention of meeting anyone, but I ended up talking to people quite a lot anyway. The whole experience always made me feel really good, & I slept like a baby afterwards.

“Buy new sheets for your bed. I like pink striped flannelette ones, because secretly I am actually a five year old girl. Drink cocktails. Attend a performance of an orchestra or ballet. Hopefully it will be so beautiful you will come away with your mouth gaping open & a sense of wonder which will overcome your sadness. Bake cupcakes (or go out & buy some). Drink tea & listen to records. Go to the library & get out a stack of books covering all kinds of subjects — meditation, interior design, music biographies, palmistry & really old cookbooks. Speak in a fake accent for the next day. Get a friend to visit & have a picnic with you on the floor. Go swimming. Buy new underwear.

“Finally, my ultimate, failsafe trick to feeling better is to put a couple of drops of Thierry Muegler’s Angel perfume. I bought a tiny bottle of it on Ebay for a pittance. My mother wears it & the scent is very comforting to me. I can’t explain how, but it just helps. I think to myself, what would my mother do in this situation? & then I go out & do it.

“Remember: Dress up, leave a false name, be legendary!

“With love, Gala.”