The Standard Hotel Calendar Giveaway!
[ 18 January 2009 ]
The Standard Hotel just opened its newest location in New York City. Close to the river & nestled into the Meatpacking District, it’s sure to follow in its sister locations’ footsteps as one of the hippest, coolest hotels in the city. The Standard also sits pretty in downtown L.A., Hollywood & Miami Beach.
So, guess what? The Standard put together a calendar for 2009 featuring staff from their hotels! The idea is weird but awesome, & it looks super-cute. It was shot by Michael Elins who has worked with Rolling Stone, Vanity Fair & Time, & has a kitschy “high school” theme — jocks, cheerleaders, prom queens, nerds, bullies, etc.!
There were only 500 calendars produced & I have 10 to give away! Yay! Everyone needs a calendar! (Especially Virgos.)
All you have to do to enter is tell us…
If you could travel back in time, what advice would you give yourself in high school?
Mine would go something like this.
You have 48 hours to come up with yours. Tick, tock!
RADICAL self-love & stardust,
Follow me on Twitter! Listen to my latest podcast! Love & Sequins 10: International Playgirls Unlimited!
Stop caring about what other people think about you. In the end, they really even aren’t your true friends. Yeah, yeah, I know it seems like they’ve always been there for you, but guess again. Just concentrate more on grades- NOT BOYS and things will work out.
Just in case you were wondering- you know that cute nerdy guy you keep pushing away? He is your one true love. Give him a chance and he won’t disappoint! Hang in there.
BTW- you look beautiful♥
Honey, you are looking so good – just lay off those french fries because it WILL catch up to you! And stop letting those boys get to you, before long they will be clamoring for your attention. They’re all a little gangly and slightly gross right now anyway.
And whatever you do, do NOT throw out any of those awesome outfits from the 80s. Trust me on this one – you will make a killing on Ebay someday and be the most authentic dressed at those 80s parties they have in the future.
And while you’re at it, do whatever it takes to get the family to invest in a little company called Microsoft. They will not regret it!
Dear me,
I know you think you’re destined to be a music teacher, but don’t neglect your other interests. Not that you aren’t good enough – you’re going to get into the Oberlin conservatory of music! One day, you’re going to want to take some time off and explore your other interests. Something besides music? Crazy, I know.
Love,
Anna
P.S. Your sense of style is improving every day!
Little Ashe Mischief,
Save all those hard earned pennies from working at the pet shop. Learn to save & invest them! While you’re at it, take the car when Mother offers it to you— otherwise you won’t get a car & license until you’re 25!
Avoid DJs when you get older, they’ll only break your heart. While I’m at it, keep reading those Cosmo sex tips— some of them DO actually work! There’s a reason your future mate’ll have had a lot of partners and you’ll be the best he’s ever had.
Also, stop eating so much sugar! It’ll take that extra chub off you a lot sooner, and once it’s off, you’re going to see what a beautiful, fun, empowered woman you really are. (Lay off the oversized tees, too.)
You are not fat! Wear a bikini while you still have the chance. Stop trying to impress your parents, impress yourself! Don’t lust after boys, if you don’t have the guts to go after them, they’re probably not going to be worth it.
Stop obsessing over past friendships, you were friends, you ended your friendship and life goes one! In a few years you wont even remember them.
Eat more vegetables. Remove your makeup every night, you will thank yourself in a few years.
Weleda cosmetics will change your life.
Smile more!
Brush your teeth.
Get your hair trimmed every 3 months instead of fighting the knots and then getting annoyed and cutting it all.
Make lists!
True success is being happy and waking up every day with something to look forward to.
weird, i was actually just talking about this with my friend. we came up with a few things we wish someone had told us in high school: wait. no. that outfit is too over the top. please do not layer all those things. please get contact lenses. please take a shower. stop buying all those band tee shirts, you will not want them later. PUT THE NEON DOWN. brush your hair you little rat.
maybe kind of negative but i REALLY wish someone would’ve told me to stop.
Hey sweetness,
just skipped back in time to share a few things I thought you should know. Firstly – time travel rocks!
But more importantly…YOU ARE A SPIRITUAL BEING – so stop denying it and trying to be normal and fit in.
Its ok to love your friends but dont live for them, deep down you know the ones who will really be there for you when you need them.
You’re going to be tested more than you can imagine in the next few years, you’re going to change more than you thought possible before you even hit 21 but its going to be the best thing that will happen.
The pain will leave, the anxiety lessens and you are going to shine again!
Your light is dazzling, my darling, never forget that!
I love you
Dear lovely Kahlia,
Please don’t attempt to self-harm!
Just remember, these people are ultimately unimportant to your future and goals. Don’t stress! Even if you drop out, understand that there is so many limitless options for how to live your life. High School will end! Don’t worry so much about your weight. Better to be fat than a tweaked-out slut!
And make sure not to take ‘no’ for an answer. Those teachers and guidance officers make nice sounding promises, but won’t actually do a thing.
Oh, and for both our sakes, don’t hit that girl with the golf club.
Or that other bitch with the steel art chair.
They both more than deserved it, but it makes you look like the bully, and nobody will believe what you say.
Deepest love & kindness,
Kahlia.
Oh Child –
stop breaking your heart – those things you are staying up late at night to angst over aren’t even a thing – you will find the right star to follow – and it’s not HIM or THEM its YOU!!! Take more photo’s of yourself – you look amazing, red hair is cool not weird and being different is something all those clones are now striving to be – stick to your guns – believe me you will appreciate it when you have the life you always wanted and they have ex-husbands and no education. Remember these words – The only person you have to live up to is you!
It’s ok to love who you love, its ok to follow your heart – but SHE isn’t what you should be chasing after either…...
at the end of the day you might get teased but give it 5 years and all the cool kids will want tickets to the things you do….and if you take another path well lets make sure you do that the best you can – you’re a long time old!
Look, it doesn’t matter how important your friends seem to be, they aren’t your family even if it feels that way.
Keep reading books. Stick to your beliefs. Take anger-management classes NOW! It will save you a lot of wasted time and energy, and headaches…
Be yourself and only you. Figure out now that there will not always be a “how to” article on whatever you need help on.
Do not only do volleyball, you will get hurt, and you will be left alone. Seriously.
Oh, and look up what flirting is now, because you still won’t know in like five years.
And you may think you’re fat but you look freaking hot! So enjoy it while you can! (and try to maintain it…at least a little?)
Oh, and Kyle is a waste of your time.
Hey young Meg, I know you may feel lonely sometimes, but stick with your friends and one day you’ll find someone to share everything with. As far as your writing, let me tell you, keep reading, keep writing, and just write what you WANT to write. It will make you so much happier. And buy a real bra, it will make you feel extra confident. Also, if you want bangs, GET SOME BANGS. No need to hate your forehead forever, love. Speaking of love, don’t despair, just give it your all, don’t hold back, and you will find what you’re looking for.
~Meg
“Wash your fucking hair.”
Hey you! Yes you! Pay attention. I know that book (and all the others in your ridiculously large rucksack) are really interesting, but you might like to pay a bit of attention to the world around you. Knowing stuff, though incredibly important in your future life (no, I’m not telling you; I don’t want to ruin the surprise) is not the be-all and end-all. You know that lanky blond boy you kick in the shins? He’s gonna be your best friend. Look after him and stop trying to break his legs to make sure he’s not just sticking around to make fun of you. Be more outgoing, don’t worry about embarrassing yourself – being remembered for something funny and stupid is better than not being remembered at all. And try not to be too scary. Mom will tell you that you’re over-sensitive, but it’s better to be over-sensitive than numb so revel in the feeling; life should be poetry! Let everyone see on the outside how brilliant you are on the inside.
Everything can be beautiful, so love it unreservedly.
p.s. dying the hair pink is fun, yes, but dying it pink and green at the same time will make you look like a cockatiel. It will be character building, but also painful to observe in the mirror when you’re hungover.
Dear self 5 years ago, you will go through a horrible year of image issues from bad teeth, hardcore acne, warts on the face (which is horrible at any age!!) and weight issues but fear not! you have friends who love you more than anything in the world and will see past all this that and be careful of the first guy to like you (he’s a jerk!)
Babe,
There will be many times that you will need to stand alone in life.
You will need to feel confident enough to be able to follow you dreams and ride those rainbows.
Your sacrifices you will make will come with big rewards
You must be willing to make these sacrifices.
Be strong enough to try to make your life better and to be happier.
Be confident enough that you will be a success and don’t compromise on what’s in front of you now
Appreciate yourself by allowing yourself the opportunities to grow, develop, and find your true sense of purpose in this life.
Don’t stand in someone else’s shadow; when the sun shines embrace it and follow it!
Sugarpuff,
please please please don’t even think about that boy, S.
He’s going to hurt you. He’s self-absorbed and childish.
Believe me.
Don’t argue with G. (you are going to be friends again with her, anyway).
Don’t spend all of your time watching movies with oh-I-am-so-smart people. Go out, look at the sky.
And don’t be sad, just wait: your true love does exist. And he is wonderful.
Cuddles, my dear.
i’d say
“baby girl, you are right where you need to be. In ten years, you won’t even remember his name. You won’t be thinking about that party last weekend, or that C- your parents gave you shit about. You can just relax, because you will be where you always dreamed you would be. You should stop thinking about college… you’ll get in. You should stop over-analyzing his moves—stop obsessing. You should just try your very hardest, but don’t take yourself too seriously, babe! Remember it is only a teensy part of your life, and remember what your mom said about high school? It’s true! I agree, it seemed far-fetched: that this was only a slice of pie in your entire life… but it is true! And you are on to so many bigger and better things, so you, baby girl, should just let things come and go, and quit all that over-analyzing. Write a novel, or take a language class outside of school… do something fun. You are so worried about grades and kids, you should focus a little bit on yourself.”
i love you,
annika
Dear Brooke,
You are gorgeous, and will get better looking as you get older, so stop thinking otherwise. Keep it up with the sunscreen, you smart cookie! There’s no need to rebel against your coach, he truly has your best interests at heart, so keep running, even when you feel like stopping just to spite him. You love running more than you realize, and as you get older, you’ll find it’s the one thing that keeps you strong both mentally and physically. And stop worrying about Mike, he’ll hurt you more than any other person before high school’s over, so just remember the good times and forget him. Go have fun with your girlfriends, date a little bit, and take photography instead of theater. Scratch that… Tom from theater was a fun crush :)
Love, me
Dear me,
High school is going to suck. It just will. College, though, really will kick butt. You’ll be the ringleader of a group of grad students and scientists, the only one able to move two literal geniuses when they’re arguing. You’ll have an amazing boyfriend who does everything you want and need, and you’ll go to an internship where you play in the mud, just like you want.
But Brian? Dump him. Dump him now. He is a moron who doesn’t actually want to date a girl with an actual libido. Thank you.
Best,
Jess
Dear J,
Go with the flow. You’re going to be successful. Trust me.
Yours truly.
Dear Rachael.
You can be strong.Believe in yourself and don’t let chances hold you back and if this is before your parents give you the offer of staying behind and completing at Aotea, take the oppertunity and grow.
Don’t think you could adjust moving on because seriously it’s not the same, you can do it.
and write. I mean it focus on your writing. You never know it might get you somewhere.
-Rae
It’s ok to be a geek – no, really – don’t be ashamed of it! (We have way more fun than the popular people). High school is sucky, no doubt about it; but don’t worry, university will be a million times better. You’ll meet amazing people who will help turn your life around. Right now, stop trying to force yourself to fit in with people you’re completely different from; and realise that you ARE an amazing person, you ARE beautiful, and anyone who doesn’t realise that is totally not worth your time.
Life is gonna be totally awesome; just wait a few years & see.
Hey you,
Although it seems like you will never get rid of those people who are bringing your life down….
you will.
You are going to meet so many new extraordinary people and experience life much more than you are currently. Yes things do get better so stop all that worrying.
And just because your last name is shy doesn’t mean you have to act that way. Open up sometimes it’s more fun to be less mysterious.
-Your number one in the world,
Twinkle
Dear little a,
I know it’s tough switching schools and leaving your friends. Seriously though, the ones you’ll finally find are worth the wait. In the meantime, please stop wearing your neon green tye-dye polyester blouse with your hot pink and bright orange crazy-patterned mini-skirt and hot pink rubber flip flops.
That guy S, don’t worry about him. You’re too good for him. Believe it or not, you are beautiful, and you’ll just get more and more beautiful each day.
Have a little mercy on your parents. They deserve better than your tears and complaints and moodiness. The day you decide to put a smile on is the day your whole life looks up.
You’ve got so much up ahead of you, new friends, new clothes, new hobbies. Be open to them all, but don’t forget the spindly hula-hooping girl you always were. There will come a time when you think you’ve left your clumsy middle school self behind, when you realize that you’re pretty and maybe invest too much of yourself in that one idea. Remember your friends, your integrity, and your family. Don’t avoid doing a good deed because you don’t want to mess up your hair.
Finally, have no fear. You might think things are awful and boring and frustrating right now, but they’re really not. This time next year, you’ll wake up energetic, excited, ecstatic, exuberant. It only gets better.
Love, Big A
P. S. You will meet a girl named J. Do NOT talk to her.
Little me,
Don’t lose yourself. Not for him. Not for anyone. You will know in time that he is a jerk.
Save that money! Your first job will come and go, and if you spend it all on clothes, you’ll have nothing to show for those long hours.
Cosmetics will be your new obsession, but take care of your skin—it’s fun to dress it up in flashy colors and pretty patterns for parties, but wash it all off afterwards! You’re sensitive.
Love your cousin. She’s always there for you, and be there for her. She will your blood best friend throughout high school, even when you other “besties” bail on you.
And love life! Never hold back. Don’t be afraid of making mistakes.
Because, in the end, there are no mistakes. We do everything for a purpose, even if we don’t know the purpose yet..
Love and sparkly kisses,
The New You
Poppet,
You are capable of extraordinary things, and your life is going to take you places you can’t even yet imagine. So please don’t step out of the spotlight, remember that you are, as everyone is, fallible but you are also sweet and smart and ridiculous and beautiful and endlessly fascinating, and you are worth it. Always.
Love,
Someone who can see the light inside you.
Ruth, It’s going to be beautiful. You may not see it now, but 4 different high schools on 3 different continents will make you special, and people will want to be friends with you. Let them. Accept them. Try to be more perceptive – there’s more love out there than you realize.
I actually don’t want to be entered in the contest, but I want to comment anyway (I also posted my answer on my blog)
“It’s interesting, because I, we, have always lived with one eye in the future looking back on the present, so there isn’t much advice I can give you that you haven’t already given yourself, which i’m sure you’ll be glad to hear. You won’t be surprised when I tell you that you are on the right track or that all the shit you’re dealing with now just gives you a much more beautiful life later and in retrospect. You might, however, be surprised to know that no, you will not be alone forever, and the certain kind of person you won’t let yourself believe exists really does. Seriously. You’ll just have to trust me on that one. Just ignore boys until college! They aren’t worth the energy, nothing will happen with any of them. BE GRATEFUL & enjoy your best friends now because only one of them will still be around after high school and you will miss them terribly.
Also, write more! In paper journals if you can remember (you rarely did) because I love reading what you write. P.S. I don’t know if i’m talking to you when you’re in school or out of it (with all the times you quit & rejoined..) but when you’re in.. TAKE MORE ART CLASSES! Please? They are really expensive in college! Also, don’t give up on your guitar/ bass because I would be so much cooler if you hadn’t. And ask your doctor for an allergy test because you’re probably allergic to something that is in most foods & wont have health insurance forever, and i’d really appreciate it. So really, just do more creative things & keep on truckin’ =). Love you (that is both a comment and a command!)!”
Dear Me,
Stop worrying about:
1) Getting into college. Stop reading those admissions books. Stop trying to validate yourself by getting into the prestigious Ivies. Stop doing things just to get into college but do things you actually want to do.
Because in the long run, it doesn’t matter what college you go to. Your ego will eventually deflate, and you will learn that it’s WHAT YOU MAKE OF THE EXPERIENCE and WHAT YOU LEARN that matters.
2) How you look. It gets better. I don’t know how. It just does. Wear scarves more. It looks nice.
3) How you have no idea what’s going to happen in your life. It’ll be okay. It’s part of the thrill.
:) I know you won’t listen to this anyway. It’s part of your nature. Anyways, breathe and carry on!
Hey honey honey,
I know that right now you feel like everything is out of control and that you’re going to have to wait until college to become the girl you want to be, but I have to tell you—that opportunity is NOW.
You may not be able to change your mom—and you never will. You won’t be able to control what the “cool” kids say to you, but you will be able to control how you react to those things. Take charge of your life. Realize your current potential. See the power that radiates from inside of you. Baby, you have the Goddess running in your veins. You don’t need anyone to tell you are amazing, other than yourself. If you know it and you feel, then those around you will see it—and you’ll begin to realize that you don’t need their approval.
Oh, and college is just as confusing and complicated as college was, if not more. So stop waiting for your life to begin and just START LIVING!!!
Love,
Luscious Lorelle (as you will someday call yourself)
Don’t think that you have to be the toughest girl on campus. You don’t always have to come out on top. Take a step back, breathe, and love you for you.
Dear Krina, You are going to fall in love with a boy but remember that when you do its never going to go away…ever so be careful in the decisions you make because you dont ever want to wonder if life would be better if you made a different choice…make choices that wont make you wonder. Also dont be quick to throw away pictures. Life is beautiful and the relationships that you make and break with people make a bigger impact on you than you could ever know. Keep your chin up. Things will be hard and youll want to give up but please dont. You have so much potential and drive and passion and I know that you can be anything you want. Never quit learning about yourself.
Love,
The one person that will never give up on you.
dear little tati,
cut your hair. you know you want to.
sincerely,
big tati
Hey darling,
I know it’s hard right know with the family, but things will work out, and you’re mom will be able to have a life again. Your friends are constantly changing, but so are you, and that’s a good thing. You’re people skills will take you a long way. Keep your options open (don’t just take art and writing classes because they are the things that you like the most). Keep up those good grades! Those bad boy types you keep going for aren’t worth it in the long run-stick to your gut instinct about guys, and remember that first impressions mean a lot. And really believe it when people tell you that you are a wonderful person, because you are. You only have one shot at life-so make the most of it.
Love, yourself
Technically, I’m still IN high school (tenth grade, baby), but if I could go back in time and give my freshman self some advice, it would be:
Stop trying to be someone you’re not by trying to write *poetically* and mentioning your hatred for something in every other sentence on the internet. Stop it. Stop it. STOP IT. It’s not you, and frankly, it’s probably bugging everyone around you.
You know that you don’t actually hate everything, so why should you pretend you? Act like a normal human being, goddamn! What has changed since eighth grade? Next to nothing.
So you discovered hair extensions and day-glo and hairspray and 4chan- SO WHAT?! Be yourself. Stop pretending to like things that you actually don’t like, and hating things you actually don’t hate (you know what I’m talking about) just to try to impress a bunch of people who will have little to no actual influence on your real life.
Stick to interacting with the people around you, the people that will make a difference, the people that matter. As painful as it is to say, your parents are right, you do spend too much time on the computer, and if you don’t stop eventually you will get a carpal tunnel and it will hurt like a bitch.
In short- GET THE FUCK OFF THE INTERNET, JESUS H. CHRIST LADY. Go outside, get fresh air! You’ll need to build up your muscles for a rock-climbing trip in the future. ;) Contrary to what you repeat to your parents every night at the dinner table, your life is not on the computer. And you know that.
Also, lay off the eyeliner, too much makes you look like a panda and will lead to very embarrassing photos.
Lots of love,
Kirsten
Write often and without abandon, and show people your pieces. Be carefree with love and careful with choices, with your own interests in mind. Don’t worry about what others think of you — most of them like you quite a lot.
Cut all ties with that leech of a boy. Curse less, spend less, smile more. Say what you mean. Take a personal day once in a while. Kiss girls, too.
And, for the love of all that is holy, love your body. You’ll be about six feet tall, but don’t be afraid to wear heels. And, yes, that short haircut is going to look really good. Rock your body (hips and thighs included!). Treat yourself well, but quit pretending to ‘really love salad’ or to ‘have already eaten’ because you think you’re fat. You are beautiful.
You aren’t flawless, and you won’t ever be — but your life is curving closer and closer to that elusive destination. You are the asymptote to perfection. That’s all anybody can hope for.
Much love from the older and slightly wiser,
A.J.
Little Miss Cindy,
It is okay that everyone is too naive to be your friend right now. Worry about the few good ones you have, and ignore all those kids that act as though you are one of the worst people they know. Soon you will find yourself in a better place, with people of your own intelligence, humor, and desire to learn. You will end up happy, and loved, and there is no reason to be unhappy now, they will all realize one day that they were the ones missing out, not you.
Love
The one that will learn who you really are.
ok, i’m the first one to comment without a letter. i’m still in high school, though, and there really isn’t much i regret from middle school! maybe i’ll do this in a few years. :))
gala, your letter is so beautiful and made me tear up! the wording you used is stupendous and it’s just amazing! thank you.
Dear depressed emo girl,
You are an amazing person who will go far. Don’t let these loser bring you down. You are prefect the way you are. Things will work out in the end and you will be be better off it you can stop being depressed. Just have some self esteem girl and go for everything because you can do it.
- love your 21 year old self.
FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT to go to art college in London.
You gave up way too easy and it would have been a very good move at that point in your life and made your life so much different than it is now.
Hey Kelly
You know that guy who is overbearing and thinks he own you? He is a jackoff jerk who will make you miserable. Go to college and finish the career you want, cause the world is gonna get real rough real soon.
[I’m still in high school as a senior, so I’ll direct this to my freshman self!]
Hey hey, Sarah!
Surprising, I know, to hear from your future self. But I’m here to offer you some advice. Take heed, young one!
Have the most fun you can — don’t let anyone take that from you. Do not stress out about school or unworthy people that you associate yourself with. Break out and realize you’re the one that matters most to yourself! If you don’t take care of yourself and love yourself, then how can others care and love you?
Don’t be afraid to speak out and say your opinion. Don’t be afraid to crack a joke — they just may laugh and if they don’t, well, your friends thought it was funny! You’re a beautiful girl with great friends so take advantage of that. Not everyone has the support you do so smile and love it.
Keep looking for that career that will make you passionate but still focus on the here and now.
Love,
Your Future Self,
Sarah
Dear mini Miss Tess,
I know you already don’t care what the small minded people in town say, you’re a girl on a mission. You are already certain of this, and it’s true, you are going to move far away and see things you didn’t even know existed. You’ll meet people who are creative and technological geniuses, renegades, artists and musicians. You’re confident, and that’s a good thing.
Just remember that not everyone is perfect and that it’s okay to make mistakes. For you, sometimes that’s the only way you’ll learn and it leads to more interesting adventures. Life is choices and those choice and how we react to them affect who we become and where we go. Remember to be kind and patient, even to people you consider small minded. You’ll attract more flies with honey than vinegar, and your messages of creativity and freedom will fall on willing ears if you are kind.
Oh, and it’s okay to not grow up too fast :)
xoMiss Tess
Dear younger self,
I wish I could tell you to love yourself and be happy within yourself
Things get better, life gets better
Hurting your self wont make you happy
Being thin isn’t what life is about, throwing up everything u eat wont make you feel any better
Be grateful for your family and friends.
take care of yourself, be proud of who you are and where you have come from
you are perfect the way you are
Carpe Diem
i love you
love Sarah
Hey, (been trying to meet you…)
Uh, this is strange.
alright,
14 year old:
good job on the vintage shopping. they’re really good and i approve. in fact, good job on everything, although if i were you, i would maybe go on that drug that no one wants you to go on, and give S that letter. give it to him. give it to him. give it to him do it do it do it, he loves you. he actually loves you and if you don’t, four years later you’re going to be sitting across from him at a party and you won’t have seen him for a year and he’ll introduce you to his girlfriend who he lives with and you’ll be looking in his eyes and you’ll both be thinking the same thing and you’ll wish you had.
good enough.
Fifteen year old:
K’s not a real friend and we both know it but you’ll be sorted out in a few months. i can’t tell you anything else cause it all has to play out. but maybe in the summer ask for the music lessons cause otherwise you’ll never properly learn.
watch out for the summer. and tell L that night what you’re thinking because he’s going to save your life. but his mom hates you.
Sixteen year old:
cannot even believe you’ve made it this far, still don’t know how you did it. but good bloody job. the day the doctor says to have a freezie, she wasn’t giving you silent permission to do something awful. no. good. will. come. of. J. he’s no good in bed, i promise you.
Seventeen year old:
not bad, although not sure still if you should have been friends with B. try and stay as close with M as you can. there were better options for prom dress but you did alright.
yeah, you did okay. so it goes.
love, 18 and a half year old
Dear High School Amy,
I have no advice for you, just keep doing what you are doing. Don’t worry yourself too much when Kris breaks up with you for the second time, much better things are only a few months away. You are going to be doing just fine in University, and you’ll make more friends than you can shake a stick at. Speaking of sticks, you’ll basically be chasing off boys with them! One of those fellows that thinks you are pretty swell… Mr. Golden Sanchez himself. You’ll finally snag a smooch from your high school crush! Unfortunately, he’ll be so drunk that he won’t even remember his feisty hands all over you. No matter, you’ll get a sober one eventually. Thank goodness you are so smart about knowing that you don’t have to have a man to be happy, although it doesn’t feel like that during a breakup. Our mindset has turned us into a fantastically intelligent person.
You are going to be a fabulous, self aware and extremely lovable woman.
Love,
19 1/2 year old Amy.
to the younger me.
remember that boy, the one you rejected, became your bestfriend, and you fell in love with?
dont reject him, and do your best to keep him around, boyfriend, best friend or just plain friend.
he needs you more than you know.
also, be careful who you befriend, your freshman and sophomore year, you will be with the wrong group, and you will feel awkward and alone. find your other circle, as soon as you can, that awkwardness from before is not part of a real friendship.
most of all dear, dont let those nightmares get you down.
you are not alone.
ps. take ap english. i know its awful, but its better in the end.
Be Brave.
Be different.
Laugh loud.
Don’t be scared of what others will think, your true friends will admire you.
Don’t listen to those names they call you, I promise you in the end your happy and ahead in life, leaving all those jerks behind.
Don’t rebel against your parents music, you will learn to love it. Trust me. Even attempting to raid mums record collection.
Don’t stop being you, people now love you for it.
Enjoy the journey, it makes you who you are today. And your a good egg, remember that.
Dear me,
I know it seems like you know who you are right now, but the next few years will test that confidence. To be honest, the worst is ahead of you, but don’t fret, you’ll be okay eventually. Just know that your family loves you and sure it may not always seem like that but Dad is fiercely protective and you’ll get to see that soon.
At the end of all the insanity, you’ll realize who your real friends are, you will have been scarred by first love and you’ll know for sure what it is you want to do with your life. Basically, you’ll grow up.
And when you’re a freshman in college and you meet that guy in psychology class and you fall in love with him? It’ll take about 3 years but you’ll get the guy and you’ll be together forever so don’t give up. He loved you the very first moment you loved him.
Love,
T
Me—
Keep at it.
Love,
You.
Hey, please do your hardest to not fuck up freshman year. You will seriously regret it. Don’t stress out about that one boy you “love”. Things will work out in a way you never would have expected. Try to remember that you’re wonderful and that you deserve great things. Make new friends and try to stay in touch with them, pretty please. Oh, DO NOT get that terrible hair cut. Other people like it just fine, but you will look back and cringe. Let me just stress the first point. Stay focused! It will make life so much easier. Trust me.
Love,
Future Shannon
How about, I’m not in high school yet? Cause i’m not.
[I’m 12, 7th grade, aspiring CIA agent and diva]
What if i told myself now, that high school will include drama, frenimies, boys, but you will one day become a fashionista and CIA, agent, as you aspire to be now and Geeks and gwakers alike will look up to you. Now, you will hopefully get more confidante as you grow, and your mature ways will be brought up with you.
~ Hopefully TaylorHey Lady,
Throw a little color into your wardrobe, and put a smile on your face.
Get away from the computer and go to the freshman and junior year homecoming dances!
Stop trying to constantly please your parents, and don’t be afraid to talk to them (or stand up to them). Your passiveness is about to catch up to you, m’dear.
Also, go to Western Michigan University. It’s a great school. But, just for shits and giggles, apply to University of Michigan just to see if you could get in. Don’t listen to mom.
Love,
a 20 year old version of you.
Hey Younger Self,
Be sure to keep spending a lot of time with Charlie especially in college and after. That sweet spark of life of a best friend ends way too quickly… And please, learn poker and play a lot with him!
You are super cool and will make great art in your future. Study hard in school and work on coping skills—they are very important. It will make your life easier believe me. You will loose important men in your life but you will keep living. Live life to the fullest, dearie, and don’t give up hope!!
Love,
Future O
Dear Angelica:
You can be a leader, you will be a leader. Don’t hide your abilities, stop saying that you’re not good in math, because I have a surprise: you are really really good in math.
Don’t worry and stop asking to your friends if you are an affectionate person because you don’t believe you are. You are! You are capable to give love to all the special boys you want.
Participate more, keep being such a good friend, flirt all you want and don’t borrow your No Doubt CD to your cousin, because he will never return it.
Love
Angelica!
A list of things for you to remember:
1. Don’t forget your Chapstick
2. Or your homework, for that matter;
3. And don’t lose your coat!
4. Oh, and make sure you get his number
5. While you ignore his nasty ex. You’re much cuter.
6. Always do the assigned reading
7. And remember to do some unassigned reading, too.
8. Don’t forget your car keys
9. Or your house keys
10. Or your wallet! Or your lunch! Or your cell!
11. And remember, Lauren, remember,
12. That I love you and that I’m proud of you.
-Lauren.
dear before, know now before your rose colored glass is shattered that high school is not like the movies or tv shows, it is real and it will really kick your ass if you aren’t prepared. when all of those horrible things happen, don’t be bitter, don’t be angry and feel violent because your friends live simple, plain lives, while you are barely holding on in a whirlwind of chaos. Do not be jealous of their lives, be proud that you have survived through all that you have, and know that one day all of the pain you managed to get through will make you a stronger person when you reach the other side. Embrace the friends who have loved you and taken care of you, do not long to be friends with those “other” girls who spend hours on their hair and spend too much on their clothes. do not hate the body you have, or the way your smile is just tilted a little to the left. be grateful that you are different and unique, and that someday soon, after other boys have come and gone, one special boy will sweep you off your feet and you will be best friends, pen pals, lovers, and the half to the other person’s whole. You are ready for all that is coming your way. Don’t be afraid. lovingly, after
Hey kid,
Don’t spend too much time worrying about the people hating on you right now. You don’t have to spend all your time worrying about pleasing people and wondering how you can be more like them. You’ve lived through a lot of things, and come through with your sanity intact, so chill out. You’re going to be just fine — no — better than fine, you’re going to be fantastic. In a couple years you’re going to find raw food and vegetarianism. You’re going to be an optimist living in Chicago and moreover, you’re going to LOVE IT.
That boy isn’t coming back, so try not to dwell on him too much. Focus on making your life better and supporting all the passions you have.
Lots of love,
Alison Charm
Post Script: You’re also going to change your name after you turn 18. Remember to love yourself.
Me,
I am glad to have been you. Purple dreadlocks, compulsive journalling, penchant for guitarists and all. It was a fantastic teenage rollercoaster.
I just want you to know two things:
1. Everything you ever pined for, wrote obsessively about, and desired in your life comes true. And it all keeps coming true, over and over. You have that power.
2. Stop pretending you’re less talented, less flamboyant – whatever – than you are, just to blend in better. Everyone you KNOW is more supportive of you than you are. Look around. You’re a fucking superstar (and by the way – so is everyone else, so treat them that way. It will always come back tenfold.) The sooner you realise this, the better life will be. And the sooner it will begin, properly, exactly the way you fantasised and hoped.
Also: Take more risks. You can never take enough risks.
x
You
Sweetheart,
Just hang on. You’re about to have a long, weird adventure. You’re going to make some decisions that seem to make no sense, but try not to be too hard on yourself. You’ll see. Life gets amazing.
If you have the power to change anything, I only suggest you try a little more bravery. Remember that no one is really watching you but yourself, and you have opportunities right now that might never come again. Test the waters now so you can jump in with confidence later.
Finally, I love you. You are beautiful, and you have so much potential. Just hold on to that silver lining.
Love,
:-)
Don’t be in such a rush to grow up. Take your time – and learn to say no – when you need to.
Realise that everything will work out, and that no matter what you do, it still won’t please some people. But that’s ok! You will survive, and even though right now you hate the sporty-jocks, you’ll end up married to one. So they aren’t so bad.
(also, start regular exercise now, learn french and don’t stop your art!!)
Hey there runt. And yes, I mean runt, because that’s what you make yourself out to be. I know you aren’t happy with yourself, but that won’t last long. Sooner or later that prince you’ve been dreaming of will come along and rescue you, even if it’s not as fairy tale as you wanted it to be. You’ll learn to love yourself, and to see the beauty in yourself that he will see.
But it’ll take a lot of shitheads to get you there. Yes, I’m including you in that. You won’t become beautiful until you learn to respect yourself, and until then, you’re as bad as the guys you’ll let take advantage of you.
But cheer up. It won’t last forever. You’ll be happy soon. Promise.
Hey You – Stop giving a FUCK about other people and start making yourself happy sooner.
(tough) love,
You
wear what you want, feel the way you want, and act the way you want. This will stick with you outside of high school, and many people will never think this way.
Dear High School Me,
Make more friends than you can imagine-friends and contacts are waaaay more important than those dusty books in your hands. Treat everyone well, read up on karma. Your name is the most important thing you own.
Did I mention to treat everyone well and with love?
Don’t worry, you’ll meet an awesome guy-but not until much later. Just live it up!!
Future me!!
Little Wee,
Dye your hair bright red, no matter what the rules say, and never apologize.
Love,
Big Wee
Dear High School Me,
You are fucking awesome.
Always.
Love, Future Me.
just fucking do it already! jeez.
(no i don’t mean sex, you dirty mind, you!)
Dear petite Micing,
1.) You will never regret taking french class.
2.) You will still be able to do push ups the proper way after four years of Taekwondo.
3.) So, you’re in art, right? Remember to take physics and calculus so that your beginning engineering classes will be a breeze.
4.) I know I’m procrastinating right now, but seriously try to stop doing that in high school!
P.S. Get your hair cut short. The long hair is so not you.
P.P.S. Also, when in France, go for it and kiss that boy!
Hey lil Rockstar!
Keep smiling! Be the best girl you can be every day. Take the challenges in life as a learning experience and don’t let them get you down. Yes, times can be hard, but you are much stronger then you can ever imagine. The road ahead is not always smooth, but the reward at the end is worth so much more then the trials that await you!
Boys will come and go, but your true friends will be there for you no matter what. Especially Carl. Seriously, take another look at him as more then just your best friend. He is such an amazing boyfriend (hint, hint)! Trust me, Adam is NOT THE ONE FOR YOU. He is a liar and a cheater and you will cry too many tears over him. You are better then how he treats you!!
You deserve the world and to be treated like a princess. On the same note, you are a fiercely independent woman who is very capable of getting everything you want for yourself. Without a man!!
Laugh hard. Dance everyday. Smile and greet everyone you know. Hold fast to your values. Lastly, enjoy every moment.
Rock out baby girl,
Your future Rockstar Self
Year Seven Kirra – I know you feel like nothing is stable or okay right now, so here’s some things you can hold onto when everything is too shakey, okay?
- There is a boy named Fabian, and he will change the way you live your life. And when he’s gone again, you’ll be stronger, and more beautiful, than you’ll ever imagine. – You can write. You can write really well. Don’t stop. – Tarren will come back. Alexandra will go. You’ll meet a girl named Maddie Lee. You’re not ever alone, not even for a second. – Be kind, honey. Be kind and honest and humble. It will get you places. – Mum loves you more than anything. She doesn’t know how to say it, she doesn’t know what to do to make you better, but she loves you fiercely. Your life will become so much better when you accept that. – When you meet Matt Whiting, go for it. You’ll fall head over heels in love, and he will move to England and it will really suck, but you’ll have the time of your life and meet some very important people. – I know it hurts honey. But you’re going to be okay.
I love you.
The Kirra That Just Finished High School With All Limbs Intact, A Godaughter, A Place At The University of Wollongong, And The Most Amazing Life.
Quick! Coletta! save your money, you do not want to wait around after school to save money to go to England you want to go there straight away and although that dress is really cute or you really want that dvd or cd they can not compare to getting out and seeing the world!
Love Coletta
Dear Little Miss Enchant,
Getting things done was never your strong point, but you should believe me that you do work hard. When you finally stop procrastinating you shine. I know you’re hard on your self for taking some “me time” but you would have never pulled out of that eating disorder any other way. Mom loves you even though she’s mean- she’s protecting you. You feel like the nerdiest goofball- but he still adored you and it’s not your fault he wanted to die. She doesn’t mean that much and so many others like you so stop dwelling and let yourself live! It’s worth it to up root, you’ll be happy you did. Playing music until four am is your personal orgasm and it’s beautiful that you cry every time you play that song. You’ve been hurt but it’s time to grow up. And it’s true- your best friend is a book and a pair of handmade fairy wings. You’ll learn that you are worth it and you get everything you had wanted just stick with it you little gloom cookie!
We love our self now-
Still Enchanted XOXO
Hey you,
This is a hint :)
Stop wearing the same hoody every day, pretty please. You are gorgeous.
Don’t be so shy and self-conscious; let it all roll. Don’t hide out; hang out with people instead of doing absolutely nothing.
Do your homework. Forget about Andrew. There will be some very nice boys in the future for you, so don’t get desperate.
Concentrate on your art and on your music and stop stressing!! Photography can be an awesome form of expression, btw.
Be mellow darling. Someday you will be a writer, so brush up on your flow, usage, etc. Hang out with A and S more instead of going and feeling sorry for yourself and taking pills… p.s. it doesn’t work and you’re much happier for it.
I love you. And don’t listen to anything bad that your mother or your grandmother say. They’re a pair of old, bitter, wrinkly bitches and have no idea who you are, even years later.You have worth. And you’re incredible. YOU CAN DO IT!!
Dear Lolli,
Listen to your heart. Dropping out wouldn’t be the end of the world. Neither would not going to college. But if you do decide you want to go to college, apply to Sarah Lawrence no matter what your mom says!
Keep listening to your heart. When you want to travel, do it. When you like someone, tell them. It will save you years of misery so you can get ON with your life!
In a couple of years, you’re going to get close to your sixth grade best friend again. When that happens, don’t let her walk all over you. She’s a great friend, but if you let her opinion matter too much, someday she won’t be in your life anymore.
Sex isn’t that big a deal. Neither is pot. Stop stressing over it!
And yes, you will fall in love someday.
By the way, your little brother still calls you Lolli.
I was raised in a cult until I was 18, and was home schooled and really had NO social life, or interaction with others, so my advice is more for my 18-21 year old self. That’s when my life really became “my life”.
Dear little Jasmine,
Don’t fly to Seattle to meet that boy from the internet. You will find a much better candidate to loose it to, I promise. No, back it up, remember when he sent you that picture of himself and you wanted to call it all off, but you felt obligated because you had been talking so long? JUST IGNORE HIM and get on with your life!
Stand up for yourself and don’t do things just because you think you should and don’t want to make anyone angry at you! You will continue to live with that fear for a long time, so the sooner you start working on it the better!
Spend less time online on that webcam and try to make some girl friends! Otherwise you will be 25 and have no idea how to make friends. The feeling of power you get from all those pervs online telling you how hot you are isn’t doing anything good for you.
Just because the adults in your old church made you afraid of them so that they could manipulate you, doesn’t mean you have to cower in fear of your bosses at your first jobs just because they are adults too. Be cheeky, sass them back, say what you think! The world will love you for it.
That older guy with the 2 year old? Don’t get involved. He’ll end up telling you he’s married anyway.
YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL and have a hot body. Love it please. Don’t go crazy with the fast food. Even though your parents were crazy, they really knew what they were talking about with all that whole food stuff they raised you on.
That looser you met and moved in with so you could have your own place? You should totally go for it, because just a few months later, you will end up meeting the future love of your life, who you will end up marrying. And if you hadn’t moved in with that looser, your future husband would have moved away from your city forever less than a month later. It’s giving me goosebumps now, so listen up missy!
Love,
Jasmine
Hey Chick
It’s going to take you a while to figure out who you are (your 30s until you really get some clarity) but as you start getting self awareness, try to be true to yourself. People like you for you – they do!
Don’t be jealous of other girls – ultimately, you’re only competing with yourself. Don’t compare.
Don’t throw yourself at guys. It’s hard to control who you like, just have some dignity about the process.
Don’t be too hard on yourself in high school – study but don’t stress.
Your 20s are for partying. Don’t be reckless with your life or anyone elses but trust your instincts and live it up!
Be careful with your words. Even if you don’t mean any harm, careless sentences can hurt. Sticks and stones harm way less.
Most importantly, your happiness is your own responsibility. Don’t be bitter. If life throws you lemons, make a vodka martini, moving on from anyone that don’t bring out the best in you and keep finding new strategies to be happy. You can’t control how the world treats you, only how you deal with it. Choose your own happiness.
xox
Gala! What do we write if you’re still in High School????
dear 15 year old self,
though intelligence, patience, honesty and hard work are oft referred to as admirable qualities do not rely on them to get you ahead.
If you want to use the school camera, the computer, the darkroom etc. don’t wait, don’t ask just take it, if you see something could use take it and use it – if you can steal something to get ahead do it – you’re underage the consequences are minimal and not permanent. Don’t get stuck sitting around without the materials you need to create, they will not become available to you without a fight. You have a vision the others are just pissing around – Put your needs ahead of theirs.
meow, my precious:
stop trying to have sex with everyone and just get yourself some good sex toys. those 14 year old boys are just bad in bed anyway, and the 21 year old ones won’t be any better, you just need to learn to please yourself. don’t put so much emphasis on relashionships and try to make some friends. try to drop out and unschool yourself while you still can and actually do it! start an anarchist group of other kids who want the same thing…spend as much time with Arielle as possible before she moves away and realize it is possible to love someone in a way that is vivid and distant, realize your inner witch and don’t be so afraid to express your crazy style! believe it or not, you’ll end up marrying your little british punk soulmate, and don’t quit your first job at a thrift store stick it out and save the money for an rv and go to more shows and dance and be as crazy of a groupie as you wanna be and if some guy named sean rask sends you a message on myspace, ignore him, trust me :)
Hey girl,
Don’t do things just because you think other people want you too. Be yourself!
And, stop stressing out so much, everything will work out just fine.
Love,
You in 5 years
Hey you,
I know you’re in that awful predicament. Feeling like you’re slow to blossom and find youself, but also feel liked you’ve outgrown your peers and this whole environment. Don’t worry about being that gangly, awkward, thin girl – things get better in the future, and you’ll be much more forgiving and accepting of yourself. Forget those people, you won’t miss 99% of them. You don’t even need their approval. I think you clean up pretty nice in a few years, actually.
I give you full permission to be a full-on bitch in yearbook signings and confessionals.
Try to be more well-rounded. Try out more hobbies, and stay away from the black hole that is the music room. You are doing good, but the earlier you branch out to get away from your situation, the better. Sucks that you weren’t born into a different class, huh? Sucks that you had a lonely childhood, huh? Sucks that you wish you look different, huh? It’s okay. Get over it. I’m sorry that you never found more people to care for you on a deeper level. You have years to change these things. Try not to hate others and yourself so much. Nicole will be your best confidant these last two years. Go to her.
Speaking of that, transferring schools is better done earlier. ie. Senior year is too late, girl. Push yourself harder. Try out some local college classes, and know about college policies, mm-kay? You don’t even have to stay on campus for a full session. Research, research, research your options!
Don’t try to be like the crowd. I was told I would be appreciated more in the future, and I am.
You are loved, even if you don’t feel it.
Hey honey,
Don’t be afraid to step out of the crowd. You are beautiful, smart, funny and extremely talented. Set your sights on achieving your dreams no matter how dumb they may seem to the people you hang out with now. You will want to go to New York, LA, San Fran and Miami to work on your dream, so go to the design school you want to go to now. Don’t take the safe route and do what everyone else wants you to do. They don’t have the talent you do and you wont ever be happy until you start doing what you truly love. Speaking of love. Its is not love when the guy who “loves you” makes you cry everyday. You never did anything to him to make him treat you the way he does. Girls that talk about you and spread rumors about you are not your friend. Stand up girl and let them know you have a backbone. Ten years down the road is too long to figure that out. You will come into your own soon enough and leave them all in awe.
Love,
You in ten years
Dear high school Raphaelle,
Keep up the hard work in school – you’re doing great. A few Bs on your report card don’t matter. Try to learn as much as you can; in the end it’s the education that’s important, not the grades. Remember what Mama told you, university will be the best time of your life. It’s true. It’s coming oh so soon and you’re going to get into someplace great.
Don’t worry about not having any boyfriends. Boys like you, you’ll realize that later. You will meet the perfect guy in university and will never look back.
Be happy with yourself. You’re stuck with you. You’re beautiful and intelligent and maybe slightly socially awkward, but so is everyone else. Explore YOUR interests and don’t buy into what the popular kids like. Being unique is the only way to be.
You’re going to make it. You’ll never believe where you’ll end up or just how great life is post-high school but just try to imagine the best moments of your life multiplied 10-fold. I love you,
22 year old me
Dear myself,
Forget about everything and everyone else. Let it go. Smile. Laugh. Clown around. Don’t think so much about everything. Just let it go. Everything will be all right. All you’re dreams will come true. We’re on our way there. Let’s make it faster by letting everything else go and just do it.
Just do it, don’t let anything or anyone (not even yourself) stop you or hold you back. Just do it.
Learn to love what you’ve got.
And most important, love yourself, love yourself because of who, how and what you are, there’s always room for improvement, yes, but love yourself for what you are and not in spite of.
Learn to love yourself like I love you know, trust me, you’ll save yourself a couple hard years.
just do it and it will all fall into place.
infinite x’s & o’s…
your future self.
Dear little me:
When you meet your ‘first love’ in high school, it will take you until approximately yesterday to finally decide to let go of him forever. Just take my advice, don’t get caught up with him just because he’s the first guy to chase you. It will take a bigger toll than you intended. It’s better for you to cut ties after you break it off rather than dwell on your relationship for years and years [text message, phone conversations, psuedo-dates…oy vey]! Let the memory die with a bang rather than have both of you allow it to whimper to death. Much love!
Dear freshman Heather,
“I want to go to this school Mommy.” It was always your dream to attend this private Catholic high school ever since you and your parents drove past it for the first time when you were in grade school. The concept of high school was always exciting but you never imagined you would ever be old enough to get there. You don’t know this yet but in October of your freshman year, you will be living in the house across the street from this high school. Funny how life works out huh?
And your life is definitely not going in any direction you have planned for it. So here’s a thought: Stop making lists, stop attempting to plan out every single aspect of your life, and just let things happen the way they will! It’s so much easier and better that way and you will be so much less stressed out.
You, being me, are probably reading this and thinking stubbornly that you won’t listen and this is all stupid. Of course you are. You’re still in your screw the world rebellion phase (that you will leave fully next year but enjoy it while it lasts).
What you should consider doing while in high school…
1) Do not start drama regarding boys and their girlfriends. Believe me, this is the year that you did this and it will not end with you being the victor.
2) You will meet your very best friend in high school. Enjoy your friendship while it lasts because it will be over by senior year. No matter how much you care about this girl and love the time you spend with her, she will slip from you and it won’t be your fault. She was always meant to go her own way. Just end it sweetly with no hard feelings and please make other strong friendships in the process.
3) Fighting with girlfriends is never worth it. Avoid it at all costs. Talk out the issues instead.
4) Walking into that Subway and filling out the job application there will result in the happiest four years of your life. You will meet some of your closest friends there, they will be like a second family to you.
5) Your classmates place you in high regard.
6) You were never meant to go to college in New York so stop filling out all of those applications and simply stick with your single California mainstay.
7) The best musical discovery you will make will be hearing Liv Kristine’s voice for the first time on Headbanger’s Ball on Halloween.
8) When you say goodbye to Jason, don’t shake his hand. Kiss him on the cheek. Just as sweet and refined as you are.
9) Try not to eat so many curly fries on Friday’s. ;)
10) Stay creative! You will find a way, believe me! Nobody can tell you what to do, where to go, what to become.
You are an independent driven girl and by doing it yourself, on your own terms, you will be forever happy. I know sometimes you doubt yourself but you have no need to. There are so many people backing you up it’s ridiculous! And you have always been there to push yourself along, to strive for the next goal to be met. There will be some bad times later on (all of your summers will be spent at the hospital because of a cancer scare that will appear at the end of your junior year…) but even though you will have some of your own, there will be more involving your family. They will need you and you will be the strength for them, for all three of your younger brothers when they are bullied, teased, and in trouble, you will kill the bullies with your death stares and will lighten the bad situations at school with jokes to lessen the punishments. Your parents will also have upsetting moments and you will do what always works in these situations; take them out to dinner at Chevys (the official restaurant for our family), talk it out, and have a lot of laughs. This all comes naturally to you and later on, your parents will constantly state how proud of you they are, your brothers will always talk about how much they love and miss you.
So, Miss Heather, while you try on your first Catholic plaid school skirt and twirl in the mirrors at the store with your Mom, both of you shrieking with joy, don’t forget this note. Take it to heart and love it.
Love always,
Your future self, the 21 year old Heather
P.S. You have a box in your closet to open when you are 30 with another letter inside of it to read from your 20 year old self.
P.P.S. Never forget that this moment in time is beautiful for you. But also know that your joy is at its best when it is coupled with sadness. You will always need the two of them to see this world clearly.
Hi gorgeous, yes I’m talking to you :)
You know that feeling you get on rare occasions, when you feel extra awake, powerful and magical beyond belief. That is your true self, embrace it and believe in it! Be this person, trust your intuition and don’t worry about what other people might think of you. People will call you the most wonderful girl they have ever met, stunning, oh-my-god sexy, the funniest, the smartest, the kindest and so on in the future.
You were not put here to play it safe, you were put here to start fires! (Quote from Sera Beak)
‘Ello Poppet!
I know you’re probably freaking out right now about everything, aren’t you? You silly little girl, just calm your cute little butt down right now! Math will work out in the end! (You will have an awesome algebra 2 teacher who will help TREMENDOUSLY!) You know how you keep obsessing over the fact that you don’t have a boyfriend? Ok, so you’re gonna fail 10th grade lit, alright? And you’re gonna retake it during your 11th grade year. (You’ll graduate on time, don’t worry!) and you’ll have to take 11th AND 12th grade lit senior year (I SAID DON“T WORRY!) and in that certain 11th grade class, you’re gonna meet somebody (He’s amazing. Believe me.) and today, yes, today, you’ll still be with him, and making grand wedding plans! (So no more worrying about that either, ok love?)
I know you’re probably worrying about that one girl who claims to be your bff, right? Bad news love, soon as you find that great guy, she gets jealous and writes you off. There isn’t anything you can do about it. It’s her issue, not yours. You’re fabulous! She just has stuff she needs to work out, and believe me, you’re much better off without all of her negativity! Plus, you have WAY better friends. =D
Prom will be fine. You’ll have a great dress. Graduation will be fine, you’ll make it. And you’ll get a hefty sum of cash. (You’re gonna buy a damn good laptop!) You’ll start a great apprenticeship. (You’ll love it!)
SO JUST STOP WORRYING! You’re great. You’re beautiful. You’re smart. You’re funny. You’re amazing. You’re every positive adjective that I can think of, and then some. Got it babygirl?
Now go out there and kick some ass!
Kisses,
Your future self.
p.s. I love you, but believe me, fashion sense gets better with age. =D
Dear Young Emcee-
I know that right now, everything can seem ridiculously difficult and dramatic, and sometimes you can look back one or two years and really hate the person that you were. Learn to laugh at yourself, honey, because you are inherently funny but you haven’t realized it yet. Right now (the now where I live), two years after highschool, you’ve learned that life can be complicated sometimes, that growing up isn’t all that it’s cracked up to be… and that sometimes you really can laugh at your own comedy of errors. Yeah, we all feel stupid sometimes, but if you’re willing to take a step back, you’re going to realize it’s hilarious. You ARE your own romantic comedy, your own Bridget Jones. You used to be self-conscious and clumsy, and though you’re still clumsy, I want you to know that someday soon… self-consciousness isn’t going to exist for you anymore. Someday soon you’re going to love yourself, laugh at yourself, and live every moment of your life with the smirk of someone with a great inside joke. And you’ll look incredibly mysterious until you trip on a flat, stable surface with no provocation. But you’ll still laugh. Trust me, you will. And it’s charming. We’re charming. Realize it.
Love- Emcee the Older and (somewhat) Wiser
dear year seven Jinny stop being such an idiot. highschool is going to be hard and it WON’t be as easy as primary, get off your butt and do some work. don’t tell all of your secrets to your friends straight away, have some dignity.learn some good social skills fast and DON’T retreat into your little hole and find some friends that like you for you, okay. all facets of your life might be bad at the moment but try and stay positive and get some help. don’t wallow in self-pity and become the school basket case
dear year eight Jinny you survived year seven and left your old group but please don’t join the mini-athletes group. they are really bitchy, half of that group and the other half don’t possess a spine. don’t become too attached to one of that group. a lez rumour is bad for you, very bad. join instead, when looking for help, the big group of normal people. don’t become obsessed with anyone. an addiction is very hard to break. the home life will clear up this year. the academics will improve slightly and in year nine thing WILL go well. you are now prepared. work hard, play hard and exercise hard.
year nine Jinny.
I would probably tell myself not to care so much about what everybody else thought.
That boy you’re seeing, yep, it’s true what everyone thinks about him. He is mean and he will cheat on you but those experiences will mould you into the happy woman you will be in a few years. Everything happens for a reason. In a little while you will meet a man from a different city and eventually you will get to be with him.
School is important but you’re not going to regret leaving early, you may want to try some more creative pursuits at school though. Put your efforts into learning another language and learning an instrument.
The reason you are feeling sick is because you ARE sick. Your doctor wont know what is wrong but you have an inflammatory bowel disease. There’s not much you can do about it but medication will make you feel a lot better.
There is no god, you are in charge of your destiny, everything is illuminated. xo
don’t change for N-E-one, especially no males
Dear high school Amy,
Stop worrying about the future and what career you’ll take on. Things will all fit into place and you will be the happiest you’ve ever been.
Stop letting petty people bring you down. They only hurt you and they have no intention of changing so please cut your losses and move on.
Smile more. Your happy so show it.
One day you will find someone who can love you more than you ever imagined..they will find you beautiful on the outside and in. Treasure them.
You’ll make it to finish high school…and although its difficult to get through gossip and rumour while its happening to you…you will learn to laugh about it later =]
These are the things that make you..you. It will keep you grounded.
Stop stressing ok.
Love your future self
Mine would go a little like this:
Darling R.,
Those dreams you have…they aren’t dreams, honey. They’re reality. They can be yours. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. If they do just give them a psychic sucker punch. That’ll shut them up.
Dearest me, Don’t try to be anyone but yourself. Those people may seem hip and happy and you will ache so hard to be accepted by them… But don’t even sweat it. Be true to you, and those that are worth it will recognize you for that.
Think really really hard about who your real friends are. Of the two best, one’s just using you.
Go to class every day. Don’t slack on your math homework!!
Talk to people. Be bold. You will shine.
High school drama pretty much dissipates on prom night.
Listen to your mom. She usually judges people much much better than you!
Don’t do drugs, they aren’t worth the trouble. Neither is he, and no, he’s not going to change for you. You will not run away together, and you will NOT be happy with him. Just let him go.
Most of all, have fun. Soon, these will be the easy days. Scary, I know. :)
Love, you.
ps. You’re gorgeous, despite what you think. And Levi (who is as nice as he is handsome!) will tell you! BIG SMILES!!!
Learn to become more aware of what makes you unhappy.
It’s not necessarily you.
You don’t have to be in honors algebra II freshman year.
You don’t have to debate if it doesn’t make you feel good.
Don’t give up when you’re discouraged. Going at your own pace is just fine. Also, try to limit your stacks and stacks of expectations, so they’re not always staring you down.
& Please pick up a paint brush before the end of sophomore year.
You don’t have to trust yourself now, just trust the process of creating…the rest will come.
I wish I had some better advice, but take care (Seriously, take better care of yourself. You’re brilliant and beautiful and you deserve to have the world see you that way.)
It would also definitely have a:
P.S.
Less is not more when it comes to clothing.
Less is more when it comes to boys.
& Don’t let either define you.
:)
I’m currently a senior in high school who’s been in a tumultuous rut of anxiety and negative self-body issues. These letters are making me tear up because they’ve made me realize I can do something about how I’m feeling NOW and I don’t have to wait for the years to have passed and look back upon senior year with a squirming stomach. I feel like my future self may as well have spoken to me through your future selves. I only have a semester left but I now intend to make it count ♥ thank you, everyone.
Hi,
Take things at your own pace, follow what makes you happy. Don;t let other suppress you from being the person you want. Don’t take other people’s negative comments or criticism to heart. You are stronger than you think! Follow your bliss.
hello, from the future!
what an amazing person you are. your optimism and excitement for life is envied and admired by your friends and the people you meet. as you get older, it will become harder and harder to hold on to that enthusiasm, but never let it go no matter what. never be afraid to be yourself even in the face of difficulty, because you’ll regret it later on. remember to have fun always!
denise
tell him how you feel! Don’t let those girls get you down, you know who you are, let them know too!
you’re beautiful, you’re confused, but you know where you’re headed. stick to the path you chose!
please just be happy! you really are, deep down, so stop telling yourself you need to change!
Hey girlie,
Don’t let others get you down. Keep your friends close and your enemies far away. Don’t give into petty gossip. Keep reading!!! Knowledge is more valuable than you know. Write as much as you can. You are talented and beautiful, and both traits will take you far. I know you feel like the most awkward, unlovable creature on the face of the earth, but you aren’t, and you’ll blossom into an even more beautiful young woman. These years are a pain, but they’ll make you stronger.
Oh, and I know you don’t want to believe me, but Mom and Dad really do know what’s best (most of the time). And they love you like crazy, even though it may be hard to see through your angst.
Much love,
Future you
PS-If any full of themselves skater boys with bad hair tell you you’re boring, laugh it off. And know that they turn out duller than a box of rocks.
PPS-Keep in contact with Kelly. Actually, keep in contact with all your good friends. You never know who you may lose.
Dear Claire,
Don’t stress because you’re going to do way better than you ever imagined. Oh and that sorry excuse for a boyfriend is going to go behind your back with your best mate so get back in the market for some new friends quick smart.
OH, and don’t cut your hair. It wont suit you. And be nice to your mother.
Love Claire.
That’s gonna be a one liner.
Enjoy your time, listen to yourself, follow your dreams. You are unique. And if they don’t get it, it’s their problem, not yours. You are special.
Life is so much more than what happens in high school. 99% of these people aren’t the ones who will remain in your life, and you don’t need to spend so much time dwelling on weather or not they like you. Those high school parties you missed out on, they weren’t worth worrying about. What you’re going to experience is so much more wonderful and exciting.
I know you feel uncomfortable right now. I know you don’t know who you want to be, what clothes to wear or what music to listen to but you find it. You find your niche. You stop worrying about weather or not you’re looking good and you know it.
Treasure your friendships and relationships that you have now. Respect everyone around you, because the lessons you learn in doing this are worth so much more than getting bogged down in cat fights that amount to nothing but compromised integrity.
Don’t act provocative, don’t make out with boys in bathrooms, don’t touch a boy your friend likes because you’re insecure. There are boy’s out there who like you, and you are going to have so much fun getting to know them without feeling any amount of guilt or shame.
That boy whose stealing your heart? You need to forget about him because he breaks it. Over and over. Treasure your friendship, because he’s going to become an amazing man but he’s not the one for you.
Most importantly, don’t underestimate your own personal power. Stop giving up because you feel undermined. You are stronger than you think.
Love, You.
Hey there young lady,
Being a child is fun but there will come a time when you have to step up and start to be a mature young lady like yourself. I know you still have alot of insecurities and unsureness in your life but don’t EVER EVER let that be the reason to stop you from making your dreams come true. Start molding yourself to be a strong person who can fight every battles life can throw at you. Because after this period, getting through the next chapter of your life will be 10x or 100x more harder than what you expect. So you have to be cautious, smart and above all love yourself even if you wake up one morning and you feel ugly…
Love,
the future U.
you will have no regrets! i have no advice for you, younger self, because everything you do and everything you are made me who i am now. don’t change a thing.
xoxo
Hello Beautiful,
You are so special and in a couple of years you are going to meet someone else who really thinks that. Its ok not to have everything planned out. There is only one person that you have to please and that is yourself. As long as you are happy nothing else matters.
I know its hard not to be upset and down, but one day you will meet a fantastic group of people and you will feel like you are home.
Also, there is a job in the airforce that you can get into without having to deal with all that university crap. Look it up.
You, my darling are the very description of class and beauty. You will never wrinkle like those beach ‘babes’. You are classic, wear more sunscreen because your pale skin is beautiful and will draw more people’s eye than some wrinkled prune will.
And one last thing… Get a job at school and make contacts, and never give up your music.
Stay true to yourself x Your 19 going on 30 year old self.
Stop worrying about what other people think of you!
Just talk to him!
Be yourself, you’re awesome. Believe it, and they will too.
Follow your dreams, keep up the art, travel when you want to. You’re old enough to challenge your mother.
Love and hugs, me
xxoo
P.s. You’re not fat!
dear high school me,
your future won’t turn out exactly the way you had planned, but it is the greatest and most magical blessing you will ever encounter.
love from, university me.
Hey kid,
I know, sometimes high school sucks and I know that you’d like the boys to pay more attention to you. And of course you’d like to study less and party more, and you sometimes feel like it’s your duty to live up to your parents’ expectations and to fulfill the dreams your mother had for herself. So yes, I am aware that teenage life has its ups and downs. And while I hate to break it to you: No, I’m afraid you will not become the next Madonna, and you will neither marry Simon Le Bon nor Morten Harket. Sorry about that.
And I’m also sorry that I have to tell you right here and now that I wouldn’t change a thing about all the heartache and soul pains you had to go through during high school, because all of your experiences and traumas got me where I am today, and that – and I hope that this makes you feel a little better – is a really, really good place.
And please know this: All your hopes and dreams? Surpassed by far. In different ways than you might imagine right now, but trust me: Your live is so much better, richer and fuller of love than you could possibly have hoped for. So thanks for starting me out in the right direction.
Lots of love
Nat
P.S. Oh, and honey, one last thing: You know that time when you decided to try out that hair color called “golden brown”? Yeah, we might want to skip that, cuz it ends up being something between rotten orange and urine yellow. But if it’s any consolation, your parents won’t be angry about it, so you needn’t hide in bed.
Don’t listen to what those people say. You don’t need them.
Stop planning and start living, life is never going to be how you expect.
Take care and fix up your hair it looks really bad.
You are so dense, you don’t even realize how smart you are. Contrary to what you think now, the only dumb things you’re gonna do in the next couple of years, is what you do to impress others. Quit thinking so much about people who never suceeded in impressing you and do what you want, you’ve got the right idea. Besides, what could go wrong?
♥♥♥ Aida
P.S.: And the green boots with the glitter dress? Not so much.
Dear Danielle:
I’m not going to tell you who to avoid or what heartbreak is coming. there are loads of things you are going to have to struggle through.
But I will tell you that you are a star and you have surprised and shocked everyone you ever know and made people proud and jealous and I want you to remember your motto: Never have a back up plan. It’s a good motto, it’s a true one, and it kicks you into gear every time.
You can have whatever you want, and you always will, so long as you don’t compromise on your goals.
And you won’t be stuck in that shit town of yours, you’ll get out and really see the world and change people’s perceptions of what an American is really like. Maybe not everyone’s opinion, but anyone who meets you. And you will love and be loved by more people than you can even fathom meeting. Move out of your shell doll face and bask in the sun.
Also, please start running and jumping and kicking as soon as possible becasue you really will feel amazing if you stop eating icing out of the tub.
love, me
Dear Marisol,
Don’t take life to seriously. These four years are supposed to be ones of having fun and no responsibilities. Those will come along soon enough. Learn to let go & enjoy life.
Remember that the only thing that matters is that you are happy with what you are doing. Don’t pressure yourself to be who others want you to be. Just be the best version of yourself and you will kick ass.
Love,
Me
Stop cutting class, don’t give up your spot in art school, stop worrying about what others thinks. Love yourself before giving all your love to others less worthy. Remember, you are beautiful, and more people love, respect and admire you than you think.
dear grace,
don’t worry. it’s all going to be okay, and you are doing so well. don’t ever be ashamed.
all my love,
the woman you’re growing up to be.
Stop masterbating so much, get a tutor, don’t be a vegan at such a tender age, break down and do the dishes and clean your room. Don’t visit your crazy ass mother. Don’t try to change to be more like your idiot friends, you were much cooler than them. Mostly, if you work and study now (at the library, not at home, you poor dear), you will move on to a really good school. Even if you have to transfer. The secret is that you suddenly become a super smart workaholic in college. Your mental development speeds up for some reason. If you just do some maintanance now, instead of giving up, college-you could go to an ivy league school possibly.
It’s ok. You don’t have to be the smartest one there. You already know you’re not, but that doesn’t mean you’re not talented in your own way. So you don’t pick up Maths as easily as everyone else? You know what you’re good at. You understand people. You know how to organise things. You’ll figure it out. And it’ll be hard- you’ll do things you reget later, but that’s how you learn.
Mom and Dad are probably giving you Hell. It doesn’t get easier anytime soon. In fact, I’m still waiting for it to be smooth. But it DOES get easier. Work at it, you’ll get there. They trust you more than you know.
And that boy who keeps asking you out? GO OUT WITH HIM ALREADY. Don’t push him away, because he’ll end up being one of your best friends.
I know there’s no point telling you all this, because you’re stubborn, and I would know. You’re not going to listen to a word I’ve said. But that’s ok.
You’ll get there.
Love,
Carmen
To BeKaH,
You are gorgous dear
Your intelligence endears
Go-Pursue your dream
Let go of worry
Read every book you want
Ignore that red head
He’s just not worth it
It’s hard to fit in sometimes
Keep on dressing up
The start… it will arrive
That Journalistic Degree-
You’ll get in! YAY.
Please don’t hold a grudge
Hold your tounge once in a while
Love who you are now
Love who you will be
There is only one BeKaH
Flaws here and there BAH
Don’t waste time worring
Reflect 08 07 06 05 04
Let the future in
Let it go relish
Bring on 09 with smiling
Frolic Live and Laugh
Love forever and always BeKaH XoXo
Hey beautiful.
Over the next year you are going to go through something that you never thought would occur in your perfect life, and it will be hard. But please know that there WILL be a day when you wake up and feel that that weight has been lifted off your shoulders. You will smile again!
Take more risks, you only get one shot at this, and regrets are far harder to let go of than the fear of failing.
Study harder, you are intelligent beyond belief, and once you leave high school you stop believing that.
University is going to be the time of your life! As I write this we’re going into our final year, and you have made some best friends that will change your life, on that note, don’t judge people at school please! Some of the people you have judged on face value are a part of this group of people that make your world beautiful.
When you’re standing on that driveway with L, tell him how you feel, kiss him for goodness sake .. one kiss could have changed everything. He does care for you, so when he breaks your heart remember that, but leave him alone for a while otherwise you will lose him forever.
I haven’t lived enough of our life to tell you where we end up just yet, but I can tell you that there is a spark inside of you that is ready to be unleashed on the world and change it for the better. It hasn’t happened here in the future quite yet but there is something about you that is extraordinary, almost magical that when you feel within yourself you will strive to achieve greatness. I’ll let you know how that turns out :)
Two more things, 1) Think things through before you open your mouth(this will get you into a bit of trouble with friends in the future, which don’t worry all turns out fine!)
and 2) Spend more time with mum, tell her things .. she wants you to open up to her, to be let in, she was so proud of you .. and for whatever the reason is that you are scared to tell her that those roses are from L stop being ridiculous! She wants you to be happy. Do all these things because after the 26th of August 2006 you won’t have the chance ever again.
Oh and spend more time with S, he needs you.
All my love,
Your future, HAPPY self
xx
P.S Write more, and stop thinking you aren’t beautiful when you and everyone else knows that you are!
Honestly?
Don’t be afraid to let yourself love.
Don’t quit.
Don’t suppress your creativity.
And for the love of God, don’t start smoking, we have an awful time trying to quit right now.
Hey me,
You’re doing the right thing. I know you want to quit it all right now because being alone is hard, but keep studying, keep ignoring the comments, keep treading your own path. At 22 you’ll be the Editor in Chief of a long-running magazine, a blog, and a micropress. You’ll eventually be Claire Askew, MA, MSc, PhD. All the work will be worthwhile. You’ll still be 5’11”, but that will get easier. You WILL pass your driving test eventually. You’ll travel. You’ll meet amazing people. You’ll discover the power of positivity and karma, you’ll live in a hippie commune for over a year, you’ll stop being frightened. You’ll learn, you’ll learn, you’ll learn. Just keep going.
Love, Your Confident (really!) Older Self x
PS: take care of your sister.
Don’t worry so much about being a virgin, it doesn’t change you world that bloody much…
Stay away from men and politics. They only bring problems. Don’t drop out of school.
Don’t spend so much time on “being different”. In a few years you will find Islam, and that will make you different enough. Prepare for it.
You’re not lesbian, you just need love. Don’t worry about it. Your family loves you, and so does Allah. Don’t worry and be happy.
Dear Sam,
Everything’s going to be alright. I know you’re telling yourself that now, but trust me, you are going to need to keep believing it for probably the rest of your life. It’s okay, it’s not drastic or anything, but don’t let go of it anyway.
Love your friends while you’ve got them, you’ll lose contact with a lot after you leave. Contact, but not connection, so love ‘em all you can and keep that strong.
Pay attention to what you wear. Learn to do your hair. Take photos.
When it feels like he’s broken your heart, don’t panic – he hasn’t. I know you think you’re strong. You are.
For God’s sake don’t let up on your music. You need it.
Don’t be afraid of love. Don’t feel bad for loving yourself. Love as much as you can. It’s alright to love something. It’s alright to be inspired.
With all that love and inspiration,
Sam
Hello Chrissy,
This is your future self. You’re probably wanting me to tell you more important stuff right now like answers to that ratty test or write you a super 15 essay but I’ve got more important stuff, that noone really tells you or they do but you don’t really believe it. So trust me.
You are beautiful. We get more beautiful everyday, did you know that? We are all made differently. So noone is the whole entire universe is quite like you nor your breed of special. Cherish that.
I know it’s high school right now and your supposed to have a gang, do all those girly things like they say in the mags but take it slow. Friends are great, you learn so much from them but you grow out of them sometimes. Live for yourself.
Pay a little more attention in math, it’ll help us both. ALOT.
Even when you’re not so sure of yourself, be sure. You are resilient. You can bounce. When you feel unloved and unhappy know that I will always be there for you, I love you and I will never leave you.
Laugh and cry and have a thumping good time my love!
And you should do that more often- smile.
XOXO Christine
“Sorry to tell you this, but things will get worse before they get better.
But when they get better, it will be better than you ever thought truely possible. You’ll fall in love, leave all the negativity behind and not only live life, but love it!”
Short but true.
Little B,
You’re more beautiful than you think, just don’t put so much pressure on yourself. There are times when you think that nobody cares about you, but in time you will realise that that is so far from the truth.
Don’t be frightened to be yourself, cos that’s who you’re best at being!
Don’t compromise yourself – he doesn’t really love you, the sick fucker only wants a trophy to disguise his own inadequacy.
Don’t start smoking. Just don’t!
Stop worrying so much – your life is going places that you never thought it would, but in doing so, it’s making your dreams come true!
B
BE AS CONFIDENT AS YOU PRETENDED YOU WERE. holy, i always acted confident but i never really was, i was always a huge bundle of stress and nerves inside. and now looking back (even though it was like, less than a year ago) i think WHY DID I FEEL THAT WAY?
so, yes. i would tell myself that it’s not a big deal, don’t freak out over whether your shoes look good with those jeans. they do. get over it.
Oh, I’ve always wished I could go back in time and tell myself things!!!
Dear me,
I know being shy is in our nature but don’t be afraid to be yourself! You are funny, smart, witty and very generous – don’t let anyone tell you otherwise! Keep in touch with people from high school, you’ve made some GREAT friends there. Try and be more outgoing when you get to uni. When you join a society, stick with it! You’ll have the time of your life. The odd pub crawl won’t hurt either ;)
Wear what you want to wear! You are years ahead of trends; shorts, waisted belts, knee socks, skinny jeans… show them how stylish and creative you are. You’ll get the right attention for it, I swear. But think about what you’re buying and don’t get something just because it has a brand name splashed across the front; you don’t want to have to do bi-yearly closet culls. Spend your money wisely.
Work harder for your A levels!!! Don’t get complacent just because you did well in your GCSEs. Chemistry really isn’t that hard, just read through it and stop playing MapleStory! Try and get some vet experience too and it will boost your application. Failing this, if you end up doing pharmacy, go get some hospital work experience during summer 2008! You will benefit so much from this and you will go on to live the dream in London.
After the Christmas do in ’04, don’t be afraid to kiss him! Even a peck on the lips would have done. It’s your own fault he got scared and broke your heart two months later. BE BRAVE. Then you won’t have to think about it for the next four years. Try not to lead any boys on if you don’t care about them and when another cute boy shows interest, ACT ON IT. You never know what could have been.
There is still much for me to learn.
But stop worrying so much and be happy!
It will all work out fine in the end.
i know this sounds crazy but one day you are going to looooove vegetables.
till then.
heart you,
you.
hey baby kate
you’ll get there. don’t worry about the small stuff, and don’t give up on him. one day it’s going to be really amazing, so keep trying to connect. one day you’ll be doing exactly what you’ve always dreamed of, and you wouldn’t change a thing. start loving what you have. you’re beautiful, and the sooner you start appreciating that the more beautiful you’ll feel, too.
see you, kid.
love (because you will love yourself), big kate.
Dear little country-punk Elisabeth,
first off, enough with the brown. no more brown eyeshadow, lipstick, trowsers.
And then: all these things that you’re dreaming of, the travelling, australia, the awesome flat in the heart of a vibrating city, the cool jobs, money, loving boy, the wild nights, colourful hair, intellectal elite that’s always drunk – it’s gonna come true. you’re not dreaming too high. you have no reason to be depressed, because one day, that boy that just rejected you and made you cry for weeks – he’s gonna show up at your club as you’re calling the shots and then making out with a tattoed boxer across the bar, and girl, he will stare at you in awe and regret every mean thing he ever said to you. you will sit on the ground at a secret, dark, dangerous punkrockparty with your 10 years older, IQ of 150 friend and shake your head at the thought that you got here after all. you will meet those people that you think don’t exist. you will love and loose and cry. you will vomit and learn to speak russian, and you will have your articles published nationwide. you will get there. you’re doing good.
and you know what? when you’re in the midst of it, all you’ll want is a dog. yup. a dog. so treasure the one you’ve got right now.
and seriously, enough with the brown. enough with the crying, and enough with the pot.
love,
the girl you will be one day, the one who will be known as lily. (long story, you’ll find out on a greyhound from canberra to melbourne)
My advice to my younger self would be:
“Take the 1st opportunity to buy hair-straighteners and use them every day!”
Dear mini-Rubyfire,
It’s alright. You don’t need all those defenses and barrier. You don’t need to pretend to be tougher than you really are.
Just let go and things will be ok.
Love,
You.
Dear young self,
Dont look at the past, I know it may haunt you but you have so many things to offer the world, they will not be drawn to your past. You are one to be loved, yes you do believe your friends aren’t truly there for you. But they are and are truly looking out for you. Believe in your self, popularity may be tempting but not worth it, keep smiling and making people’s day better. Don’t worry about not having a boyfriend for most of high school, love being single, cause relationships are scary. Don’t worry so much about others, you are talented and worth every penny in the world.
Dear girl,
Everything is going to be okay.
It’s not going to seem that way and I know it doesn’t know. Mom didn’t abandon you, she died, and while that sucks, you have her strength. And remember that, you’ll need it.
You are smart and talented and passionate. Do not ever forget that. Do what your heart calls you to do. Trust me on this, looking back on the last ten years, those will be the best moves you ever make.
One day you will be an amazing woman, who is loved and cherished by the most breathtaking man in the world and the most wonderful friends you could ever imagine. You will be very lucky.
Oh, and get Dad to take you to the doctor now, and keep taking your vitamins. It could save you years of pain and suffering, treat the damn illness now.
But above all, do what Mom told you to do so many times – follow your heart, follow your love. She was right, and if you do it, you will be happy and all this will be worth it. Even if it doesn’t seem like it now.
I love you, and your daddy does too if you’ll let him.
xx,
Me
Hi!
Even though things look like the darkest shit hole you have ever been to things do get brighter! Even though each day is a living hell soon everything will work itself out. Sure, you still won’t have the worlds largest confidence, but still you will be a completly other person than you are now. You will learn what true happiness is, and if you remember the time you are going through now I’m sure you know deep inside your heart that you can go through anything and survive!
Good luck and see you in a couple of years
love your body. noone really notices those few extra pounds but everone will notice once you’re just skin and bones. and the worried look in your moms eyes hurts worse then those words spoken by some strangers.
honey, you’re beautiful.
Dear 13 year old self;
Tough times are about to explode all around you.
Roll with the punches, experience everything you get the chance to experience – good and bad.
Friends will come and go, but while you have them they will enrich your life and teach you about you. Don’t rely on other people to make you feel happy, once you learn this the nights of tears and pain will be over.
Don’t feel helpless when you don’t fit in, learn to love the internet, you’ll meet your best friends this way and nobody can party like those guys.
most of all, trust yourself & your instincts. the second you realise something in your life is wrong, change it. don’t spend months agonising over it.
Once 2009 hits, I promise everything will fall into place and everything will sparkle with magic and possibility.
Love,
Your 18 year old self.
love yourself before you can love anyone else. you are beautiful, a true gladiator… get ready for your happily ever after.
love,
invincible you
Dear Nat,
Things are going to get worse, and worse then that, and then some more, but its ok. You’ll live, you’ll go on to live in places you never thought you would, you will see things and do things that are fantastic, and meet people who are so amazing.
You’re going to fall in love with the wrong guy, do it anyway. He’s going to hurt you, go through it anyway.
Don’t stop writing, don’t stop thinking about that story that’s in your head, it gets big, really big, its your story to tell, so tell it.
Read Harry Potter, just trust me okay?
Cut your hair soon, it will be fine, the world won’t end.
Stop being afraid of everything, talking to other people won’t kill you, trying new things doesn’t always hurt. Yes, stay away from chickens, its an okay fear, they are evil.
Nanny
PS: Don’t get your hopes up when it comes to the X-Files series ending, its awful.
Dear Nathalie,
Keep on walking backwards and going on photographic tours of the school. Wear those rollerscates to art class and paint on french moustaches and talk in a french accent all day. Keep on making high school exciting for yourself!
Who cares if you dont have a date to prom! Fuck that shit, dont go. All these highschool guys are stupid anyway if they dont understand why you call everyone cynthia and sing showtunes.
All of your wildest dreams will come true. You’ll travel the world, and climb trees and put swings in your livingroom. In college you’ll be a total heart throb because guys will think weird is somehow sexy or mysterious or something. You’ll meet the perfect boy, who will go skydiving and make a fort on his bed, and have long talks with you in your closet.
Just hang tight kid, New York is calling your name!
Love,
The future you who is happyhappyhappy
ENOUGH WITH THE ANGST!! Jesus, you’ve got it pretty sweet. Give mum & dad a break too. They literally only want what’s best and temper tantrums will get you nowhere. You’ll be glad you have protective parents when you get a bit older. They’ve got your back.
YOU ARE NOT AN ADULT.
Straighteners are gonna come along and fix that crazy mop. Don’t sweat it.
You are not fat. Say that with me. YOU ARE NOT FAT. God you are so thin. Please please flaunt it before all that pizza catches up with you!
Please start driving as soon as possible. Buses SUCK.
Don’t worry if you feel directionless right now. In a couple of years you’re going to discover a real talent for photography.
When you hit college, give that fizzy blonde girl a chance. She’ll end up being your best friend. Seriously.
NEVER EVER LET ALICE DYE YOUR HAIR. You’ll thank me for that one.
Give hip-hop a chance. You’ll thank me for that one too.
Most importantly: The M.E. won’t last forever. Please keep positive, I swear that in a few years it’ll be behind you and you’ll feel better.
Laugh more. Talk to boys more. Get in trouble more. In fact, get arrested – your record’s expunged at eighteen, and it’ll give you the practice dealing with cops that you’ll need later in life! Stop taking school so seriously. You’re going to drop out and adventure around, and by that point, you’ll have wasted all your opportunities for youthful fun, studying and working on horse shit no one’s going to care about. Never stop writing – never. That’s going to actually take you somewhere, and it’ll take you even further if you keep up the hard work. Don’t fret so much about being an ugly duckling. It’s going to shape you in important ways and make you strong. Plus, you’re going to get really hot. Like, really. So just roll with the identity experiments you’ve got going and don’t look back. And seriously, girl, eat better and exercise. You’ll thank me. Also! When you meet that Sean guy several years down the road, just have a fling with him and move on. DON’T DON’T DON’T try to get serious with him, it’ll be a nightmare. Now do all this stuff I’ve said and you’ll be an even more amazing version of you. Kid, you’re going to be awesome.
I’m still in high school, so i’ll write to myself in middle school xP
Dear Lost Me,
I know that everything seems difficult now. You feel like your coming out of your skin and can’t control your emotions anymore, that’s okay. It’ll be okay soon. Your life is never over, smile, never give up on yourself.
Love,
Your Brighter Self
Dear Baby,
Stop stressing so much. Your grades will carry you through to the college you most wanted to attend.
It’s okay that you’re socially awkward, your true friends will shine through in the end.
Save your money, stop spending it on things you don’t need!
I’ll see you in a few years, when you are much happier!
Hey Jessica,
You know you’re doing great and your art career is a sure thing. Don’t worry about comparing your art to other artists, cause your own style is bang on. Work on your own style and don’t be afraid to be loose and messy.
Also, you are really really good looking and you don’t need to be so shy and you don’t need to settle for any second rate guy. You know the ones I’m talking about. Lot’s of guys are going to fall in love with you.
You wont be disapointed in your future, you’ll be very proud. Traveling, art, design, and lots of love and friends.
I’m still in high school but I’ll be graduating in a few months, but here it goes anyways.
Hey. I know you’re in love with him right now. I know how it feels. But nothing lasts forever and as high school goes on, it will get better. You will make the best friends you’ve ever had in your life, friends you’ve never expected. Hold on to them. And your future? Don’t worry about it. Your options are endless. Change your mind a million times. I love you.
Dear me,
Unrequited love is for housewives and little girls. Why waste your time pining over someone that doesn’t like you? Duh!
Love, me
Seriously: Stop dating people. You get swept up into their lives and you forget – or never get a chance to find out – what yours really is. It’s not worth it. They’re not worth it. Do your own thing; embrace your weirdness; write more. Go out for dinner or have sex but don’t let them take you over. You’ll find the right guy eventually, I promise. And maybe he’ll break your heart. That doesn’t mean you should spend the next ten years breaking other people’s because you’re too confused not to. Go two years without a boyfriend – make the first one your first year of college. You won’t be missing anything.
I would say:
Your freshly dyed pink hair is the start of you discovering who you really are. Do not regret daydreaming in class and drawing in your sketchbook instead of listening to lectures. Do not stop waking up an hour early only so you can dress as elaborate as possible. Do not let cruel words from ignorant people destroy you. You will become a strong woman who has the world at her fingertips and a mind full of ideas.
Oh and you know those guys who won’t give you the time of day although you’re madly in love with them? Yea, they end up falling for you and you turn them down because you realize what losers they are. HAH, right?
CHRISTINE!
Here’s some advice from four years past high school.
SPEAK OUT! Stop hanging out with those shitty girls (you know who I’m talking about) – they’ve been nothing but poison and letting loose away from them will make you and your more cherished friends closer. Put posters up and try to go for your Student Council. You did it in 5th grade, why not now? That guy that you thought was cute back in 8th grade that’s still increasingly hot right now? Go for it. Fall down, fall hard, fall easy, but fall and go for him. It’s still now that you’re wondering ‘what if’s in life.
Life sucked, but guess what, it’s going to get harder later. So try to do everything that you can NOW. Explore the world. Be carefree. Try out for those tennis and soccer teams, stop hating on your teachers, stop sleeping in class, stop ditching, and try to find a happy medium between your parents and yourself.
Trust me. Finding happiness now then later will make life easier.
Love,
~me
You are not strange. You are not a freak. There is nothing wrong with you or bad about you. Please don’t let anyone convince you that you’re going to outgrow being ‘weird’ or that the way you feel now is just a phase. What you are is UNIQUE and this is a great, great gift. Hold it close to your heart and love it, because it’s rare. You’re not going to outgrow it or lose it, it’s not a phase. And never feel the need to hide it. There will be people who are threatened by it and have a problem with it, but let that be their problem. It’s not yours.
Trust your first impressions of people, good or bad. They are dead on.
Those people who swear high school is the best years of your life are wrong.
And look into holistic health practices and remedies. They’ll alleviate the allergies everyone wants to give you drugs for, and you won’t have to be stones all the time.
my dearest one:
i know you think you are the freakest af all.
The thing with your back (scoliosis) that makes you wear a corset for ten years (until you’ll have 15) 23 hs a day…
the same thing that makes you an ‘intelectual’ girl and not the kind of girls that go to dance and care for their image.
You are avoiding peoples hugs, just trying to hide this hard plastic thing that’s covering your entire back and almost all your bust.
Don’t care about that.
You are developing how to have strong bonds with special people. Unordinary ones. You will always know how to find them.
You have the gift of knowing how to be surrounded by the most interesting people in the world.
And every step you take a new door will be open.
You know to go trough these doors.
You are brave (although you think you are the weakest one with a shield so nobody could notice the vulnerable girl that’s behind it)
You will dance.
Believe me.
You will have your house plenty of books. But also plenty with make up products (you will love MAC) and mosturizers, creams, etc etc.
You will look good. You will be proud of yourself.
I swear you will like yourself, and the best man in the world will love yourself.
It’s just a question of time.
And you will have to wait a looot of years.
But you are a hunter, and a hard worker. You will be learning lots of things, intelectual ones and spiritual ones.
And the they will come.
The day you would be writting this in your little and beautiful house shared with your loved one.
And getting a little sensitive (because you will always be that way)
I love you.
m.
Listen L,
Whatever you do, don’t give up. Running away isn’t the answer. When shit hits the fan you can’t just pack up and go. If you do, everything will only catch up to you tenfold. Be nicer to M and don’t let her join the cheer squad, a lot of shit happens and she quits anyway.
- L of the Future
PS: Spend more time with grandma, she’s not going to be here forever.
Darlin girl,
I know you always hated writing those ‘letters to your future self’ during high school, when teachers made you seal them in secret envelopes, but this isn’t one of those things. This is just me, telling you it’s all right to mellow out. This is me telling you you’re fine. You’re intelligent enough, capable enough, pretty enough, kind enough. You work hard enough. Don’t waste your time worrying about trifles. Appreciate your friends and appreciate your time. You are amazing.
You have your whole life to figure out what you want to do and who you want to be with. There’s no need to rush. Go out with your friends and have fun and play around with boys and try to do well in school, but don’t get crazy about it. Everything will unfold as it should. Remember that the lowest points in your life leave you with the most knowledge.
Dearest Mini-Me,
You are a butterfly, just like Daddy always said. Keep in mind, though, that the most beautiful butterflies are also the most impossible to capture. Most everyone you encounter right now will try to pin you to corkboard. But, do not fear, one day that pin will go through and away you will fly. Soon you will learn to flaunt the beauty that resides in your wingspan and to bask in the elegance of taking flight. Be patient, it is just a matter of time. You have my most sincere word.
See you soon,
Marissa
Hello, you.
Things are rough, but getting through it will make you that much stronger. You may often be dealt a shoddy hand, but you will laugh and smile and delightful about it.
You are amazing and divine and pretty enough the way you are.
Slow down.
Say yes more often.
I love you, you.
Dear little Kath
Don’t run away.
No matter how hard things get or how frightened you are.
Stay until you see the light and learn the lesson.
Then if it isn’t meant to be you’ll be able to walk away with love in your heart.
I am with you always.
All my love.
Kathleen
dear me,
i hope i’m doing things right. i’ve been standing my ground, & i haven’t given up. i still have days where i feel constantly knocked down, but what keeps me going is knowing i’ll get to be in a better place in a few years, where you are. i can’t wait to be out of this silly high school life & into a new life i can truly enjoy. i hope you are happy & doing what you love; i hope that will be me in two years.
love, me.
Dear Young Lia,
Don’t go hating yourself and don’t feel upset. What you are going through now is a massive learning curve. It’s not going to be easy, it wont get better for awhile but your going to be stronger than you could of ever imagined. You don’t need to feel guilty about your friends, don’t follow them and don’t be them.
Get help from others…they are crying out to help you.
Don’t go down the road your travelling. Stop. Breathe. And work out what you really want.
And don’t worry about boys. You still haven’t found one yet, but you’re still young.
I love you young Lia
Dear Burcu,
The most important thing for you to remember is that you’ll grow out of your phase of being an awkward nerdling, but they won’t grow out of being terrible, terrible people. You’re better than that, and you always will be.
You’ll grow up and find incredible friends along the way and with each life lesson that brings heartache and tears, you’ll grow stronger as a human being. Every mistake happens for a reason and you’ll learn from each of them.
I love you so much.
Don’t be afraid! Every single day is a gift, don’t waste it. Do what you want, when you want, how you want!!!
Sweetie,
It’ll be okay. All those things you’re worried about will all happen in just the way they are supposed to, even if it’s not according to your plan.
Don’t put your heart so into people who can break it, and spend some time on yourself building up your inner strength. Also, respect your body and put the razors away. You will cut too deep and you’ll regret it.
Yes, you will accomplish everything you want to be, but learn to be patient and let it come to you. Stop running after things that don’t make you happy or more complete.
I can’t wait until you see how far you’ve come when you get here. You’ll be thrilled at who you are, what you’re doing, and the person you’re yet to become.
-future Freya
HELLO petit Moi,
Yeahhh..no, it’s mee! YOU! Check it ouuttt =D. I know, turns around.. you have a tush’ndahalf. Chill out when that happens, by the way. CLEAR THAT HEAD!! Just in general – I know it’s a really hard when you’re on the brink of “who you’re going to be” but, my sweet, devour your youth with the slow grinnig glorification it deserves, and don’t you worry about all this fluff. You be you, drink and enjoy. I care about you a lot & what you’ve gone through for me. When you follow your instinct, not what suffering and negative people say, you are right. Very right in every way. They never even actually meant it, not once. You’re more loved than you know and I’m sorry you get hurt, I’m sorry it happens. You’re right to give them a break for being fucks. You’re impressive. Thank you, brave thing, for it all. xo
Dear Vanessa,
You are not a disappointment. You are intelligent, thoughtful, and empathetic. Your beauty is astounding. Your smile lights up a room, so SMILE!
You will get past all of these consuming negative thoughts. I know it seems like the end of the world, but there is so much in store for you.
Drinking won’t solve anything, and neither will sex. Hold out for the guy that really loves you. It’ll be worth it.
You don’t need to throw up or harm yourself to be in control.
Imperfections make you human, and perfectly lovable.
Don’t be afraid to break a few hearts in your quest for self discovery.
Ask for help.
Your parents will believe you. They do love you, no matter what.
Though I am still in high school while writing this to you, I have learned so much.
I don’t know what exactly the future holds for you, but I do know you will make it.
You have so far.
Love, You
YOU!
you are wonderful, stop doubting youself. For one second stop and realize that excluding yourself from everything is not a way to solve anything.
Embrace life! it is so short, you have to live! Feel absolutly everything you possibly can.
everything will be alright.
Hey babe,
I know i’m not too far away from you, just a little over a year apart. That seems so insignificant at first, only twelve months or so, but trust me sweetie you’re going to love what happens. So much can change from january to december, and you’re going to love life more than you thought possible.
Yes, i’ll tell you right now, your english class is going to be exactly as time consuming and stress inducing as you think. Its going to be a year of struggle and confusion, but don’t you worry babe. You’ll get an awesome grade, your teacher will love you, and you know what? Part of you will even thank her for it, in the end. For forcing you to learn to survive under the piles of homework college will undoubtedly bring.
Smile Marg, you’ll outrun the deadlines. You’ll outlive the stress.
Yes, everything really is going to change at your dojo. So much that you’re going to leave and join a different one. But this is not the end. This new place, teaching the same style, is going to give you something you never imagined. You’re going to fall in love with it, you’re going to spend more time there than you ever did at the other. You’re going to find a second home, filled with people you feel comfortable with and admire, children and adults alike.
You’re going to learn to love yourself, to be yourself. One day you’ll find that just by being you, you’ve saved someone’s life. Three peoples lives, to be exact. And i’ll tell you now, thats a marvelous feeling, to know that just by being alive you have kept somebody else here too.
Maybe i’ve been letting too much on, but allow me to share this one last thing with you, my little blonde virgo. This one very, very important thing. I know all about the tears you’ve cried, the reason you’ll never look at blue notebook paper the same way again. I know you’ve spent years loving someone you could never have, and even now, when you’re finally over him, you fear that nobody will ever love you like he cares for your best friend.
Take a good look in the mirror, babe. Take a good look at that face, that hair, that heart, that soul, and smile. Because you know what?
You’re wrong.
Sam Sam Sam,
THINK! Life isn’t all fun and games and frippery, there are hard decisions to be made. You’d do well to study up on them. And PLEASE, get things right with your family. You will never move on to intimate relationships with others until your relationships with them are as they should be.
And you are lovely, don’t waste your time with obsessing over what you look like. Your time is very, very precious.
Keep working hard and don’t get caught up in the high school drama. You’ll get everything you’ve ever wanted if you stay focused. And don’t worry about quitting crew. That’s not what will get you into college anyway.
Hey you!
Relax. I know you think there’s nothing more to live for but hey! there is. Just hang in there. I can’t promise you that everything will be ok but I can tell you that you’ll get by and also will learn to live life. Which is amazing, trust me.
Relax, this too shall pass.
Love you,
You’re a beautiful and unique snowflake.
Hi me!
I guess you know life sucks but still You need to be strong, people will critizise you anyway. You need to be happy and enjoy this part of your life because this is the time when you get to do crazy fun stuff and maybe you´ll never get the chance to do it again. Go out more often, there are a lot of nice places to see! Take care of your true friends. Stop worrying about grades, you´ll do better than you need. And if you think that dropping school to go to california is the best you can do, think again! Your way better than that! You can DO whatever you want because you´re an extraordinary girl that dreams a lot, and if you make those dreams come true, your life will be everything you wished for!
*To my sweet mademoiselle:
Dont be so harsh on yourself, enjoy! Enjoy this short years, you will miss them one day…
You look amazing! You are NOT fat! And you know what? This people surrounding you will not be in your future, so stop paying attention and dream big!
Scream!! Run! Dress as hardcore or as ridiculous as you like cause you love it! Whats waiting for you is far far away of calid caribbean so go to the beach!
Feel the cold water and sink your feet on the sand! and your skin in the sun! Because now you dont mind, is right there at your door step! But one day you wont have it right there anymore…
The one that loves you the most!
*Vanessa
_P.S.: Don’t cry so often, it’s not worth it!
you are more beautiful now than you will ever be, dont let anyone tell you otherwise. don’t listen to your mother, you are not fat. do not lose your fiery temper, your sense of justice and the passion that makes you stand up for what you believe in. your faith does not define you. give him neither your heart nor your body, he will damage both permanantly. stop hurting yourself, one day someone it will break someone’s heart to not be able to kiss away the scars. learn to drive, but avoid supermarkets at all costs! don’t stop drawing, don’t stop dreaming.
Dear High School Self,
Stop acting like you don’t care what people think about you, and start actually not caring. Let go of all the negative people in your life and bring the positive ones closer to you. Realize that you’re having a lot of fun, and be resolute in continuing to have a lot of fun. That boy that you look at from across the room at every show at Harry Katz or CN, but have never talked to? Talk to him, be bold and make a move (I mean if worse comes to worse and he breaks your heart you do have a pretty awesome safety net of friends to fall back on! Or you know, they’ll beat him up. ;) ) Come to know that you ARE beautiful and lovely and a pretty good person. And anyone who doesn’t see it isn’t worth your time. Learn to speak up, instead of speaking softly because you’re afraid of saying the wrong thing. Love yourself for who you are.
Love, Meghan
PS. Don’t kiss that boy from Georgia, he will end up stalking you for at least 6 months then again after graduation.
Dear, Carolyn, age 16
I know being shy and afraid is in our nature, but it truly makes high school more difficult. Just like Dad tells you, focus on your studies and grades. In the end, that’s all that will matter. Neither he nor Mom is ignoring you; they know it’s a difficult part of life, and that these struggles will make you a stronger person if you allow yourself to experience them. Dad’s tough exterior is to be respected, and he only wants you to be a strong individual. They don’t want you to give in to the pressure and obsess about how awful it can be at this age. It hurts them seeing you struggle, so don’t think they don’t care. Making life easier for you by taking you out of high school will only teach you how to avoid challenges. You know this in your heart, don’t you?
And, because you’re so shy and afraid, having all the friends in the world isn’t going to fulfill your life, especially if you aren’t willing to open up and be a friend. Just hanging out with girls who seem in control and not easily bothered by the hardships of high school won’t magically make you secure unless you’re willing to work at it. Thinking that this makes your years at high school easier in reality only makes your life safer. Playing it safe isn’t rewarding because you won’t grow and become a more confident person. This is a time to explore your potential and stretch beyond your boundaries.
It’s not easy being different or overweight, but being different is wonderful and what truly makes you special. Be proud of that, and please, be strong. All the insults about your looks come from insecurity. It’s not easy realizing that at your age, but some people feel better about themselves when they insult others. If I’ve learned anything, it’s that showing a shy and fearful personality only makes you a target. Take it to heart when Dad tells you to forget what the other students say and ignore the ‘mean’ teachers. Staying focused is the best thing you can do for yourself. He knows how tough it is, and he’s learned a lot. Listen to him. He’s been there.
Please, don’t think that Mom and Dad don’t understand. They do more than you realize. Learn from them that if you continue worrying about how awful life is right now, you’ll keep yourself from realizing how wonderful it will be in the future if you work hard at your studies and stop obsessing on what the other students are thinking of you. Actually, they’re just as scared and insecure as you are. Life is tough for everyone. You’re not the exception to the rule. They’re tough on you because they want you to succeed. Always know that they would hand you the universe on a silver platter if they could. However, they know that discovering the universe on your own is much more rewarding.
I want you to know that you’re doing a great job! I look at you, and know that you are awesome. You’re so kind, smart, and funny. Those are the traits that make you so wonderful. So, don’t regret not having sex with that cute boy after school that one day. You are gonna breathe the biggest sigh of relief when you get older. Believe me! You’ll never need that sort of validation to know that you’re special. You are rewarded for staying true to yourself and for all of your hard work and determination. I promise.
Love,
Carolyn, age 42
Don’t take the hard subjects because you think they’ll get you a high grade, take subjects you enjoy (don’t take the hard maths, chemistry or biology). Read more books. Keep on dreaming big, but learn to put things in place so that they can eventuate and become real life experiences. Be kinder to your family and show less angst towards them, they want what is best for you. Learn not to spend so much time worrying about the way you look, or worrying about food and understand that real beauty is about being a good person, being kind to others and being all your little self can be! Be grateful for your life and embrace every opportunity. Much love.
Hello there youngin’,
I’m going to make this short and sweet, because there are some mistakes you will have to make on your own to become the woman you are today.
The few things that I can tell you to save you heartaches are theres…
Please do not be afraid to be yourself. I know this is said by people all too often but it is rarely taken to herat. Even if something you want to do seems outrageous – do it!
Boys will come and go, but friends- are FOREVER. Lean on them and when they need a shoulder to cry on, be the first one there.
If you are heartbroken, by all means, cry your eyes out, eat LOTS of icecream, whine to your friends, sit on your couch in pajamas for a week. But after a week -MOVE ON!!! No boy in this world is worth all those tears.
Lastly, always believe in yourself. No dream is too far. If you want it – go get it.
Always,
Me
Hello sweety,
Listen: things will get better, I promise. But you should be trying a bit harder, too. Do your homework, it’s not even that hard and bad grades will bite you in the butt later. Trust me. Don’t be afraid of boys, they’re just as awkward and nervous as you are and you’ll feel stupid for having missed out later when you figure out how much fun they are. But don’t settle for the first one who comes along either, because you’re amazing and you deserve someone really great. Don’t let people walk all over you. Stand up for yourself. If it feels like someone is taking advantage of you, get away from them. They might get mad but too bad, you’ll be miserable if you spend every day trying to do what everyone expects of you. Just be yourself and do what makes you happy.Love, Future-Emily
Babe,
Sleep with more boys. You are a sexual rebel, even if you don’t realise it. Just treat them more lightly – don’t get so emotionally fixated. In a few years you won’t be able to remember their names enough to look them up on Facebook, even though you could have torn them and yourself up into strips emotionally at the time. Ignore what your friends say.
In fact, ignore your friends, just forget them all & make new, better ones. They will drop you when you don’t play the success game on their terms – don’t worry about them. In fact, try not to worry and stress at all if you can.
Stop trying to help everyone else with their problems. They mostly aren’t interested in helping you with yours in return, or even with no expectation of return. A few are – treasure them and forget the rest.
Walk away. Walk away from your life, just walk out that door, walk out on the high-paying “high-status” but soul-destroying degree and job, walk out on everyone and their stupid standards and aspirations and don’t make them your own – it will cripple you for years otherwise.
Don’t spend just to fit in with friends you don’t care for and to numb a gnawing unhappiness. Save the money for later and deal with the unhappiness instead.
Give up everything and study art, because there is nothing else that will make you happy. And move to the big city for goodness sake, you know you’ve never wanted anything else.
If you want to dye your hair or cut it off, just go ahead. So what if you won’t be able to get a proper job. Forget trying to conform to other people’s idea of what you should look like. You have your own style, flaunt it. Stop trying to hide it just to fit in so you an earn money. Walk away from the mediocrity.
Antidepressants can help to fix things. But art probably helps even more. It helps you to let go and not care any more about anything except this piece of work, this day, this moment in time. The rest will fall away.
Someone dying hurts like hell. It feels like losing a limb. And just like losing a limb, you learn to live without it. There is nothing you can do but bear it. Nobody else can really understand unless they have experienced the same thing too.
Art is long, life fleeting, and sex and art are the only antidote to death.
XXX didi
ps. seriously, have much more sex. it’s easier now to get a boy than it will ever be again!!
Dear Rachel,
You have a beautiful heart.
Dear Stacie,
Do not fuck you know who.
Toodles,
Me
Dear me,
He’s not what you think, he won’t last—and even if he did—he’s not worth sharing, which is what you’re doing…Right…Now… A big, bright wonderful love awaits you…It may be a few years from now, but it is well worth the wait.
Shine on!
-Me
Dear me,
You’re not the ugly friend, so stop thinking it. You’re not the fat friend, so stop with the frumpy clothes. You aren’t a perfect person, so stop worrying about being a disappointment.
You are beautiful. A free spirit. Let everything go and LIVE. Be the you you want to be.
Stop babying everyone. Don’t burden yourself with their problems.
Most importantly, LOVE YOURSELF. Be confident in the beautiful and brilliant young woman you’ve grown to be. Don’t feel ashamed of anything.
Affably,
Your Soon To Be Self
Dear me, Still in high school, but who cares? don’t let the “popular kids” scare you. who cares what they think? don’t be shy. don’t wait for friends to come to you, go to them! don’t feel awkward about taking people’s pictures. in a few years you’ll feel weird NOT taking their picture. learn to drive early so then you don’t have to worry about it before you graduate, even though you don’t want to drive. keep your room clean!!! you’ll feel much more peaceful if you do. don’t worry about not having a huge romantic life; who cares? it will happen when it does. don’t let anybody tell you what to do, always speak your mind, & love everyone & everything you touch. always say what’s on your mind. give thanks. tell that boy that you’ve been crushing on what a stud he is & that you guys should totally get coffee. who cares what he says? just be you!
love,
your older self.
Hey gorgeous,
I am obviously not supposed to write this because everytime I try the computer shut off. This will be my 5th time so I’ll make it quick.
Love yourself. Enough said. Life is beautiful and worth living to the fullest. What you were in high school is not what you are now so stop stressing over it. I want you to be the best you can be and do the best you can. Get over whatever it was that made you feel like you weren’t equal to everyone else. You’ll be fine.
With all my love,
Corey
Dear Wee Self,
You can’t even begin to understand how beautiful you are. Stop hurting yourself and get it together! Don’t be afraid to be in pictures, because, I promise, you are gorgeous and you’ll never be this skinny again. And that will be ok!
Don’t close any doors yet, I know you feel trapped now but university is going to be like a breath of fresh air and you are going to love it.
Enjoy the ridiculous freedom of being young and dumb more. Stop being afraid of the future, it turns out pretty well! And you grow up to be hella cool :)
Also, The Boy? Not worth your pain, love. He’s not even going to get into college, and the emo thing loses its charm in a couple of years.
Also, don’t drink those last five shots of JD at Cindy’s house. Trust me. Trust me.
Love, the girl you are going to be!
Hey girl from the past,
You’ve been through a lot already. You may not feel it right now, but give yourself a few years and you’ll realize how different and special you are (in a good way, I promise!). There’s a few (kind of important) things you can’t change, but theres also a lot that you can. Heres a few pointers in the mean time:
1. Change is good, embrace it.
2. Boys aren’t that important. Believe me, the good ones aren’t around here anyways.
3. You’re strong. You may not think so now… but you are!
4. Happy is you, don’t forget that.
5. You’ll have a lot of friends who really are your true friends, but they won’t all be around forever.
6. You’ll also have a few that aren’t so true. Watch your back (you can’t trust everybody).
7. FAMILY = LIFE. Always be there for them. Don’t fight with your mom, always be there for your dad, don’t be embarrassed to ask your brother for advice.
8. SCHOOL IS IMPORTANT... You’ll get into an amazing college anyways, but try a little harder. It won’t hurt.
9. Don’t let those slackers bring you down babe, your better than that!
10. RED HAIR IS BEAUTIFUL. Everyone will be jealous one day, trust me.
Gorgeous,
You’re strong, smart & intelligent girl. You don’t need boys to validate that!
ps. They’ll come along later, anyways! ;]
<3 Your future self!
Hey little me, try not to worry about everything – it’ll be hell for a few years, but you’ll turn out ok. As grammie says: you have to kiss a lot of toads before you find your prince, and he’s currently sitting in the other room playing FFX.
A random question if anyone wants to answer (since I’m really, really bored) what do you do when you’re stuck at home sick. I started feeling sick on friday and now tuesday’s coming up and I’ve had to call out of work. Poot.
Hey De, listen…do not get too dramatic about what those other girls think, one of them works at burger king…and the other has a giant rash on the back of neck that hasn’t gone away in 3 months. don’t threaten to kill anyone, you’ll just get detention…even though you truly don’t mean it literally..you were just pissed off.be yourself, stop trying to lose weight..because people think you have nice big boobs anyway. dont skip lunch anymore, and stop calling out that nickname you gave your teacher because he knows you’ve been secretly calling him that and he’s going to say something sooner or later and further more your always talking about his nice ass when using the name…man that was weird. and if i were you i wouldn’t worry so much about that boy not liking you back because later on you find out he is sort of gay-curious…
cheers!!
Katoo,
Stop lying to everyone. You are not dull. You are interesting and entertaining without making things up, and people do like you. I know this is a self-esteem issue, but trust me… At some point soon the lies will catch up with you, making you feel even worse than before, and it will take your self-esteem a lot of time and work to recover. You should really turn to storytelling instead of lying, right now! I swear it’ll come in handy during those cartooning classes in university!
You didn’t turn out too bad though, and you really cleaned up well :-)
Luv,
Katoo
I would tell myself to be more outgoing, date more people and have more fun instead of worrying about what people think. You’re going to have a wonderful life if you just hang in there for 4 years and remember, you’re much cooler than them. Pick up some feminist literature and read, read, read.
Here’s the heads-up – sweetie…
You are remarkable, creative, inventive & brilliant – GLOW for the whole world to see!
Quit feeling guilty coz once you free the energy you spend on guilt you will have more for doing what you know you can & want to do!
Don’t let your bro smoke mull. For F£$%” sake.
Wear sunscreen every single day – I know it’s a drag but you have no idea the results it will give you later :)
Keep riding horses – you know you love it & no amount of ‘work’ should get in the way of that freedom & joy.
You are going to meet a man who will change your life in equal parts for good and bad – hold on very strongly to who you are.
And hey! Do what YOU want & love & look after those around you – these are not mutually exclusive ideals!
And remember you are remarkable, creative, inventive & brilliant – GLOW for the whole world to see!
I LOVE YOU Love me :)
Molly –
You are cooler than you think. You’re intelligent, open to new things, and you mean well — even if you don’t always act like it. It may seem like your parents are lame now, but they know their shit, and you’d be lucky to turn out half as cool as they are. Which, as it turns out, you totally do.
You never set foot in public school but you’re going to graduate college. People will hire you to take their picture, and a whole lot of people will know your name. And those boys who keep making you cry? You’ll barely think of them in a few years. Congratulations — you’re gonna make it out of the small town you grew up in and you’re not going to get pregnant or hitched at a frighteningly young age!
One thing you should start practicing now though, is getting out of your head. Happiness will come not when you dissect yourself and try to put yourself back together like jigsaw puzzle. It will come when you put yourself in the heads of other people, and reach out with kindness and respect. DON’T TALK SHIT. No matter how many clever quips you can come up with about that bitch who flirts with your crush or the guy walking down the street with his buttcrack showing, that hate WILL come back to you. It will permeate your life, your face, and everything you touch. So start practicing love. Love for yourself, and love for everything around you. You will feel the difference.
Keep searching and looking ahead. Big things await: excitement as well as tragedy. But you are stronger than you know. I know you can do it.
Love,
your future self
Dear me,
A boyfriend is not everything. Even the perfect ones have their flaws. And quite frankly, they can be more trouble and more time-consuming than they’re worth. Treasure your friends dearly and find reasons to make more. Don’t shut yourself into your antisocial nest because you’re lazy. At the same time, you can’t be friends with everyone. Don’t procrastinate, it only hurts you in the end. Get good rest because it’ll keep you from zoning out and reaching new heights of clumsiness. Most of all, find happiness with yourself and don’t just look for your imperfections. You’re not as bad as you think.
Dear tiny me,
He loves you. More than you can possibly know. And under your tough exterior, you love him to. So tell him this, and tell him in detail. Tell him about how the moment you saw him you knew it was real. Do this before the world implodes and you are taken far, far, away. Also, don’t waste time hating your mother’s boyfriend. He’s a nice guy, despite his triple chin and lack of hygiene.
Wear whatever you want to wear. Laugh however you want to laugh. Think however you want to think, and most importantly, be whoever you want to be.
~
Dear lil’ self,
You are not fat. Despite what you, your grandparents, and your lab partner may think, you are not. Stop thinking that if you weighed 86 pounds, everyone would magically love you. Life doesn’t work that way. Be nice to people. Don’t silently pity your best friend for being uglier than you. Don’t try to be prettier, try to better yourself. If you were the most beautiful person in the world, but you were mean and judging , you would still have no friends. Love your body. Love yourself. Don’t skip parties because you have ‘better things to do’- go. Enjoy yourself. Don’t be afraid to tell people that you are upset when you are upset. If you silently suffer when people hurt you, tell them they are hurting you. And remember, 90% of the people you envy and wish to be are people you will never see again.
Lil’ self, you are beautiful. You may have what you percieve to be acne, but you are still a wonderful vessel. Love what you want to love- not what your peers tell you to love. Sing when you want to sing-not when you are told to. Laugh whenever you can- not when you feel obligated. Be who you want to be- not who you think you are.
Hi chiquita!
When you are a sophomore, a book called Twilight will begin circulating. If you read it, you will contribute to a culture which has made it socially acceptable for a girl to worship a 107 year old virgin. In other words, do not read this book.
Love,
Your future self
(PS: omfg edward cullen is so hawt!!!1)
Dear 15-year-old-ally.
You are beautiful, big ally will look at pictures of you a few years from now and curse the fact those legs went AWOL somewhere along the track.
Lay off the black eyeliner sometimes – ypu may think mum is just nagging you but it does look a little like you have been punched in the face. You will get better at it though!
Don’t listen to the people who tell you you are dumb or ugly or a slut or whatever. They are actually full of it and you will go home to the sweetest revenge ever in a few years when you see what the girls who were so amazing in high school’s lives finished when high school did (yours begun – psyche!)
Have the strength to tell people how you feel about them – it actually works – you may think it will be the worst thing ever if they don’t share your feelings but take the chance.
Do what you want when you decide it and seize the day.
Much love.
PS 15-year-old me – don’t take up smoking. Save the money you will spend on a holiday or something – you will thank me in the long run
Beautiful soul,
No matter what you see printed in media or even around the halls of what some call hell, don’t forget who you are. You ARE beautiful, no matter what anyone says. You don’t need to kill your body. It will only end up hurting your heart in the end.
You’ll meet Phil. Don’t break his heart. And in the end when you two begin to fight, work it out and don’t be a bitch. You’ll regret it later because he will be your first love and it can last longer than you may think. I promise.
Any other boys you meet, remember that your body is a temple. Also, don’t over think the relationship and don’t let others opinions dictate your relationship. You can have so much with these guys, you just have to roll with it.
Don’t slack off in school. I beg you, do not. You should have learned from your first experience. DON’T KEEP IT GOING!
Above all, learn to love yourself and just learn. Talk to your parents and you’ll realize how much you could have missed.
Live everyday as if it’s your last.
Love, You.
Start living.
Come out of the darkness, into the light.
That light inside you shines brighter than all the rest,
you just have to find it.
It may not be easy, it may not be quick,
but do not fear, you WILL conquer it.
You. And only you will get you through.
I love you. And you will love you.
Embrace difference. Embrace love. Of yourself. Of others.
You will share love, You will share your light.
This is only the beginning.
This is the first pancake, it always burns.
But the rest are delicious!
dear fabulous,
you no longer have to hide in the corner, and live your life through other peoples dreams. become YOUR dream. life YOUR life. YOU are fabulous, an you will prove everyone wrong, and most importantly you are going to prove yourself wrong. never stop doing increadible and amazing things that may seem impossible , because for you, there is no impossible.
love your life,
love always,even more fabulous.
A Letter To the Little Me
Good morning Starshine,
Promise me that you’ll hold on to that last stretch of sun in the summertime, the kind that lingers on the asphalt of your street at the end of the day. Promise me that you’ll fall in love with the rain, sitting out on the lawn, letting it race across your skinny arms, soaking deep into your skin, a peaceful realization to the world. Promise me that you’ll feel the warmth of your first love’s bliss, racing through the desert heat, every moment a passing blur, but the passion and thrill remaining a constant speed. Don’t be afraid to touch someone who is troubled, love someone who is bitter, or even face your own skeletons with wide eyes and an open heart. To be scared is to be human. Don’t allow your feelings or insecurities build a wall from becoming close to others. Love and be loved for exactly who YOU are.
With care and thought,
Sam
and P.S. – Read some more books, okay?
Hello there mighty scavenger of the world!
stop worrying about your life.. Enjoy high school, coz, time will come for things to happen. So stop frettin! eat, drink and live as MIGHTY as you can!! stop trying predicting what you’re future might be (which is absolutely awesome by the way :D).
Don’t let others stop you for becoming what you want to be. THEY ARE JUST ALL ENVIOUS OF YOUR WONDERFUL, AMAZING SELF!! Enjoy life and be open-minded. you are not entitled to one thing, but to everything. Love experience and love people! Be thankful and generous always. Don’t ignore things, for at most times they are what you’re looking for.
don’t worry what you are in high school or who you are, because that is what people like about you!
Carpe Diem!
Seeing as I’m currently a sophomore in high school, I’m going to write the letter from the future that I hope one day will be true.
Dear Katie, It’s going to be OKAY. You will make it and its going to be beautiful. Stop being so concerned about keeping up, its going to happen one day, for now just enjoy your innocence. Remember to embrace other’s happiness and let yourself fall in love with it, life isn’t a competition and trying to make it one will only make the world more cold. Don’t be so worried about every little thing that goes wrong, because in the long run it really didn’t matter if you had a bad hair day or if your best friend kissed your ex. You have the world in front of you and you’re going to take it by storm-things might not go how you plan-but whatever happens will be for the best. The future is bright. Love, Your Future Self
It’s not what was intended but I must admit writing it (as well as reading the other lovely comments) was reassuring in this frustrating age of first times and seemingly end-of-the-world situations. =)
Honey,
don’t worry… you are beautiful, smart, creative, talented, and full of affection. Even if you aren’t right now, you will be someday. Everybody might seem to think that you’re only fun as a friend, not a girlfriend. But someday you know, that fun, easy going, smart, and talented is something that someone usually seek for everlasting relationship.
Never to worry if it seems like no one loves you as a girlfriend. Trust me… lots of boyfriends never equals lots of happiness. On age 24 you will find your true love, someone you will consider as soulmate, someone will loves you because you are smart, fun, talented, full of affection, and makes him feel special. Hold on to him and never betray him.
One day, you will become someone who makes important decision. You will have a job that you will love and you still manage to spend some time for your hobbies in design and creative.
My honeys… don’t worry so much about your future. If you’re worry too much about anything, you will make some rush decision that you could regret someday.
Live excitedly for today and you’ll see, you will always be alright. Remember… you are nothing but beautiful, smart, creative, talented, creative, and full of affection. Somebody will always appreciate that from a girl…
Love you,
you in your happy future
Dear angry, sulky Mars,
You should know that you’re actually beautiful, no matter what our peers say. You are also going to turn out to be very strong, edgy, and inspirational. Don’t worry right now; in a year or so, you’re going to start living for real, and having adventures, good ones and bad ones. You’ll change, but that’s good, because other things will stay the same – you will always need to have time to yourself, you will always keep writing.
Keep your chin up, babe. Graduation’ll come sooner than you think, and after that I’ll be waiting for ya.
-Me
Kristeen,
I know things suck. I know they are rough. You have an amazing life ahead of you and it’s because of what you’re going through now that you become who you become.
Karma? Keep believing in it. Do what you think is best and screw the nay-sayers. Continue to be YOU and not some sheep. Things will get better. They will also get worse. But every day that you live through it, you become more and more of an amazing person.
You will find men who are attracted to you. You will find someone wanting to marry you. But hon, don’t fall for a guy just because he’s willing to be with you. Hold out. Hold out for someone who makes you feel amazing right from the start. Boys who hurt you in the beginning will devastate you in the end.
And by the way? At least some of your dreams will come true: by the time you are me you will have two amazing and beautiful daughters.
And that’s all that matters.
Love, Neetsirk
Dear High School Amy,
There are a few things you need to know. High school is only 4 years of your life…and in the big picture, that’s very little. You don’t need to know where you’re going or have your life mapped out, just let it come naturally.
Don’t try to be popular…the trend is that the less popular people are more successful anyways.
You’re going to get engaged, right after high school. Way too young – you will end up breaking this off. You’ll date a few other guys – stay far far away from Jon.
You’ll do really well throughout college – but it wouldn’t hurt to go to the odd party. It doesn’t matter that everyone is older than you… and drinkng will not kill you.
Don’t get your belly button pierced by that scary guy in the smoke filled room…twice. Don’t get your cartilidge pierced by the floozy at Claire’s…nose is ok.
Appreciate having a whole family while it lasts.
Spend more time with Scott Falk.
Don’t go work in Parksville…just stay at Impact, you’ll go back there anyways.
Stop cutting your hair so short!
Cherish that tiny body!
Save your money…don’t blow your student loan on stupid things! Maybe get a cheaper car…although it’s really great on gas. OH and stay away from credit cards!!
You won’t have to stay on the fibromyalgia meds much longer.
It’s ok to question what you believe in – and you should never feel guilty for it. Challenge EVERYTHING.
There’s so much more, but some things you can figure out on your own. You’re doing amazing and you are beautiful. Stop trying to fit in…you’re better than that.
Love,
Your Future Self
Dear Me,
Stop trying to please your parents. Stand up to them and tell them you’re tired of playing co-parent to your brothers. Talk to your mother about the state of your relationship with her, and with her husband.
Stay the hell away from Joe, Mark, and Adam. They are NOTHING BUT TROUBLE. Oh, and the creepy Russian. (You’ll understand one day.)
John does love you, but don’t waste your time waiting for him. He’s never going to leave her for you.
Also, as much as your relationship with Rory is one of the best things that will happen to you, it will not be easy. Nothing I say can prepare you for it.
Stand up for yourself – to your parents, to your so-called “friends”, to men. If that means dumping that idiot Mark as soon as things begin to seem fishy, or ending your toxic friendship with Emily…do it.
Don’t be afraid to talk to Lex, you will find yourself wishing desperately that you had.
Don’t worry about the whole boyfriend thing. When you least expect it, you’re going to meet someone amazing. And trust me when I say when you least expect it! It will be horribly inconvienient – but that’s the way it always is.
Oh, and by the way – eventually Rory will teach you this, but I’ll say it anyway: it’s okay to be feminine. It doesn’t make you weak.
And stop thinking that you’re too fat to wear anything but those horrible too-big shirts that completely hide the fact that you have boobs – FABULOUS boobs, which no one realizes because you hide them!
Love, your future self.
P.S. Braces are not the end of the world, do not drop Drama in grade 10, and do not under any circumstances take English Lit.
P.P.S. It is okay to be angry at your father. Don’t shut out the whole world though.
Dear Charlie,
Hello you. Fifteen sucks, doesn’t it? But I’m writing to tell you to hang in there. Seriously, you have some tough times ahead of you, but you’re strong enough to get through them. You are more amazing than you know, and I know you feel different and wrong, but I promise you everything you do is right for you. Just hang on, and it will get better. One day you’re going to meet an amazzing guy who won’t sort it all out, but he’ll hold your hand and look after you while you figure it out for yourself (he is also extremely phwooar). Hold on tight, poppet. You’ve got a lot to get through before you become me ;)
Lots of love,
Charlie (you! how weird is that!?)
Dear little Oz,
Things are going to get better, then worse, then better, then worse etc…that’s just life – and you know what? That’s ok cos you’re a lot stronger than you think you are.
You’re gonna make dumb mistakes – but do it anyway, it’s kinda fun to look back on. Stop thinking that you can’t regret anything, or that you should punish yourself for fucking up – that’s what everyone else will do – don’t add to it.
You’re not weak, if you actually told people what was going on with you they’d see that – but I know you won’t…neither will I. We’re strong as fuck and looking back now I’m actually really proud of us.
And don’t worry about getting someone to love you – stop trying to figure out if you’re smart or pretty cos you’re both, and the person who makes you clue in to that is SO not who you think.
You’re gonna meet friends you’d trust with your life, and whom make you realise that the little old lady you met at Eastland that time was dead right. They are the most wonderful thing in your life.
You’re gonna fall in love with people totally unobtainable with beautiful souls and you won’t get over them…that’s ok too, it gives you nice memories and you grin like a nut years later when you think of them.
Hang in there. It’ll hurt like hell…as soon as you get your life back from one thing, a new one starts – but that’s us – we’re phoenixes babe…go easy on the pain-killers and don’t stop trying to find the cure, no matter how much you want to. It’s there – I promise. It’s not great – and there’s a new battle waiting after that one…and then another one after that – but hey…some of the doctors are really hot…and right about now I’m running out of body parts to go screwy – so I’m guessing I’m near the end of it all.
And despite what it puts you through – you really end up loving your body, all thanks to your lovely wild friends, whom you love more than anything – so much it scares you because you’re not used to wanting to be around people so bad…but you need them…and yea – it’s scary.
I’m still scared, I still cry, I still get so sad I think my seams will burst, I still fuck shit up. But that’s what life is, I’m not gonna lie to you. But you got me and I got my future…we’re not dead yet!
Love you.
Thanks Gala…I needed to write that.
Dearest, Darling, Tiny, Sweet Liesel-
You are so much prettier than you think you are. You won’t really start realizing that until you’re 17, but at 15 you’re beautiful. You don’t look like a boy, you look like a pixie princess.
Your sillyness suits you. Hang on to it. There is nothing wrong with being sad, or even enjoying being sad.
Your momma loves you so much. She’s just more scared than she realizes. It will be hard but it will get better I promise. If you try to slowly become a little less secretive with her, it will be easier in the long run.
You are going to meet a boy and fall hopelessly in love. You are going to have your first kiss, and like the little vixen you are, you will be the one who kisses him. He will break your heart, slowly and agonizingly. Listen. You may feel immature now, but if you met him in a few years, you would DEVASTATE him. As it is you will still befuddle and charm the sucker, even though you feel young and stupid. Cherish this madness if you can. This is the pain that gives birth to love, and art, and growing up. It’s beautiful just like you. At least he will be decent enough to not push the physical stuff until you meet the right boy.
Treat the right boy as well as the wrong boy should have treated you. You MUST be honest and open with him. As chatty as you possibly can be, even about painful stuff. Be nice to him, but being direct is the most important thing. Love him while he’s here. Don’t be afraid.
You’re meant to have a crush on every boy. You’re meant to make beautiful mistakes.
Oh, and even if you don’t realize it yet, you already are an artist. You are already an artist.
To my most precious one,
Oh my lord! You are such a delight! Seriously girl, don’t even let anyone con you into thinking otherwise. I know that you’re feeling kind of lost right now. And I know that you’re thinking there could not possibly be anyone on this earth who understands you.
Well I come bearing good news kiddo! While it seems like right now could not get any more of a big deal, you will get over it. You’ll get over the silly people who bring you down. You’ll get over the stinky boys who are totally wrong for you. You’ll get over all the dramaz that seem so earth-shattering.
And you know what’s even better? Holy shit – when you get out of all this, you will be the coolest cat in town. Not only will you be a complete babe, but you’ll be more and more aware of your own friggin’ awesome potential.
You’ll burst into manic grins at completely random moments, you’re that happy! You’ll be surrounded by proper friends who totally get you and think the world of you. You’ll have at least three boys hanging off your every word at a time (I did plan to make this a ‘boys are not the be all and end all’ speech, but c’mon – we deserve to be proud of ourselves!)
In short, you’re one rockin’ lady! (You know all this. You know that you know it. You just need to start living it, for heaven’s sake!)
So. My advice to you, little one, is as follows
1) Girl please, get over N. Yes, he is gorgeous. He is just as kooky and creative as you are. And I know it seems like you two are too in sync to be believable. BUT HE IS VERY, VERY GAY. Stop hoping that will change and he’s suddenly going to be rushing around, trying to sweep you off your feet. Enjoy his friendship – you’ll hardly see him when you leave school, and you’ll miss having someone on the same wavelength as you.
2) For that matter, get over all the other silly little boys you were swooning over in high school. They were all pretty nice guys but once it didn’t work out you should have moved on and stopped beating yourself up about it.
3) Stop putting yourself down because you don’t think you’re as pretty as anyone else. You’re gorgeous! Once you learn to love yourself a little more, you’re gonna be slammin’ hottie! And then you’ll be watching the fellas crumble helplessly at your feet. It’s pretty sweet viewing, lemme tell you!
4) Your friends are not in it for the long haul. People who keep you around just because they think you make them look hot by comparison (Pssshht!) are a total waste of your time – make sure you’re ready to sever some ties when the time comes!
5) Smile! I know you’re self-conscious kid, but I have it on very good authority that when you smile, you cause minor traffic accidents and sudden heart palpitations. Get your picture taken! Everywhere! And stop pulling that ridiculous sullen face in photographs. Yes we get it, you’d rather be behind the lens. But it means that looking back, you’ll have no awesome pictures of yourself. AND YOU WILL REGRET IT!
6) Don’t stop painting! Or you’ll regret your lack of practice in a year. Don’t stop sewing either for that matter. You’re such a creative little bunny, it makes my old heart swell with pride.
7) Tattooing yourself with your best friend on exam block was not the smartest thing you ever did. It’s a pretty good story to tell afterwards, and thankfully your parents will force you to get it removed – but kid, that could have been a disaster. Whoa there!
8) Dance! Sing! Shout! Wear that stellar purple wig in public! I know that it seems like lately the performer in you has taken a leave of absence – but you were not meant to be a wall flower! Get out there kiddo – even if you make a fool of yourself, you’ll still be more memorable than the kids sitting on the sideline, wishing they were you.
9) Don’t stress about not having a boyfriend. You’re okay – more than okay in fact! And you have so much happiness to look forward to! The boys you’re lusting over right now are ridiculous! Go for the cute intellectuals, for heavens sake! You want someone who can keep up with you!
10) In about a year or so, suss out a fledgling blog called galadarling.com. It will bring you joy, inspiration and endless internet procrastinatory material.
So don’t give up hope honey. You are blessed with wit, charm and a particularly nice arse. And in a few years all your troubles will seem so insignificant it’ll make you laugh.
Until then – all the love in the world, my darling!
Quit it, darling.
You know you’re looking like a mess, and not caring about who you are, what you look like or what you want is not going to make your life better. Remember that song? Jimmy Eats World, I think? “Hey, don’t write yourself off yet! It’s only in your head you feel left out and looked down on.” It’s true, you know. The only one who’s really looking down on yourself is you. Maybe the other girls can be bitches, but what yo’mama said about ignoring them makes it better. Don’t accept what they say from time to time – they’re not better than you, hon. They’re not sure of who they are either, and you should know that you’re intelligent, gracious, kind and beautiful – a combination that’s not as common as you think.
Just stop worrying, start caring! You can keep your book, your laptop and your messy bedhead, but change your attitude and self view! Don’t let them step on you. It’ll take some time, darling, but you’ll get to the end of your teenage years gracefully if you start thinking you’re worth it.
Dear Me,
You are worth so much more than the men you date. You think he’s the one and that he’s going to come around and stay with you forever, but he’s going to reveal that he’s a real asshole. You’re going to have sex with him for your first time to try to make him love you— I know you think you know better than that, but everyone makes mistakes. He’s going to join the US Marines when you get to college. You’ll cry. You’ll want to wait for him to come back, but in the mean time, you’ll meet the REAL man of your dreams. He’s nothing like the guys you dated, especially not the one you’re waiting for— oh, baby girl, he’s a real man and he’s going to treat you right. I’m sorry you had to hurt so badly to see you were worth a love like his. I promise that all the extra weight in the world doesn’t mean you should have to suffer a man’s abuse. Your prince is coming to save you.
I love you,
Vanessa
P.S. You know how you think you’re going to medical school? Well, I’m sorry I signed you up for Chemistry and Biology. You’ll hate it and cry to your mother (you’ll cry even harder when you see your grades). Your plans are going to change. You’re going to decide to live your dream, be an English major, become a writer. Even I don’t know where we end up yet, but you’re going to be so full of apprehension and so happy. So, so happy.
Hey me,
I just wanted to let you know, it’s totally okay to be who you are.
None of the people here matter, you won’t be taking them with you later in life.
Go up and talk to him, chicken shit.
Apologize for everything.
You know that you’re better than she ever is to him.
You were the first. He still loves you.
She can copy everything you are, but she’ll never be the original.
You’ll get back together.
You’ll love and be loved like you have never known. He’s the one. He’ll bring the magic back to you.
Express yourself. Your art is beautiful.
You ARE talented.
Carry it through in school, don’t bother going for Theatre Production. You’re an artist.
You can get accepted into this snobby art school easily. Your portfolio IS that good.
You’ll go there and be successful; making new goals and hardships on yourself that will only make you fucking stronger.
Don’t be so sad little one.
Soon, none of this will matter.
You’ll be ahead of them all, living your life and laughing, not having them drag you down anymore.
You’ll be happy.
I love you.
-Ka.
(Thank you Gala. You have no idea how much I needed that right now. )
Liv,
High School is a mixed bag for you, both good and bad things will happen, but stay happy. You have Allie, who is your best friend in the world and the two of you can work through anything together. When the two of you become seriously depressed she will be instrumental in helping you out of it, oh and going to Costa Rica will help too. High School will be bearable if you just Stay Positive!!!
I know sometimes you feel like you’re friendless and alone but just wait, you will find that group of friends who loves you for who you are and the 5 of you will have the most amazing times together, so don’t feel too alone cause you’re not. Oh and I know that you just want to be lazy and slack off in school but keep pushing, cause it will all be worth it when you get into a great college that is perfect for you! So keep at it!
Love, Future Liv
It’s gonna be alright. I know you need someone to hug you and say this words to you, so I will: everything is going to turn out just fine. Not perfect, as life never is, but fine. Just concentrate on living and enjoying being alive. Don’t let anything get in your way: life will change, you will change and it will keep getting better for you. Not perfect, I say again, just better.
One day we will be happy, I’m more sure than ever.
I would say to myself,
“Self, life is going to be great for you! You are going to college and will meet some really nice, fun people.
Don’t date the same guy all through college! Take Microbiology as a freshman. It is way cool!
Start excercising and don’t drink all that beer!
By the way-find a really good cosmetic surgeon to fix your nose after you break it!
Lisa
HEY MAMI,
YOU RULE IT SO GOOD
BUT REMEMBER TO WEAR GLOVES WHEN YOU’RE COOKING HOT PEPPERS, THAT SHIT BURNS. HARD.
LOVE YA~
To Mee..
Congratulations on making it so far. Your heart will heal and everything will work out. Just have faith and keep at it.
You’re way more beautiful and inspiring than you could ever contemplate right now.
Ps.. Don’t ever let that girl get the better of you, you’re far too amazing to get involved in that.
Lovee .
Psst – forget chemistry. You’re really bad at it, and will do much better with a better prof in college. Most of my advice is for uni, because you did great in high school. Once at uni, hop into it! You already know what you want to do, so just get up and go! Mind you, avoid That Girl and her boy toys – they’ll ruin you, the whole family is rubbish; you don’t want to get into a lawsuit, right? Right. I kid you not. And don’t listen to your real brother, your brother in law loves you more.
Go to Australia. It’s worth it. The Kaplan course is not, save your money for a laptop or something. You don’t have cancer, so save yourself the medical bills. Go military.
It’s not as bad as I’m making it sound. I just want you to avoid a few pitfalls to save money – the other ones I’m not telling because after you go through them you’ll know you’ve grown. You just get a little more pessimistic/realistic as you get older. I know you’ll like that. Besides, you’ll be really happy your final semester. You might be unhappy now, borrowing your sisters’ clothes, but just wait – you get rockin’ glam later on. I promise.
Oh, and try anthropology. I think you’ll like it.
Hey little me,
I know you’re about to run off to dance class and then running training and then work, but stop for a minute.
We both know life is pretty good, and everything is going to work out exactly the way you planned – and it is going to be good. You’re lucky that way.
But support M – he is going to go through a very rough time, but you help him through it ok. You don’t do so well, however, so make sure you talk to someone about how messed up it all is – allow yourself time to grieve. You don’t have to be strong all the time.
You should also stop putting other people first. Your parents do love you in a really messed up way, and they won’t hate you for doing what makes you happy.
You will figure out that your true friends love you for your quirks – and the sooner you admit that you are an egotistical overachieving bitch in the nicest possible way, the happier you will be.
You are strong, beautiful, clever and talented. Don’t apologise. That is the way you are.
PS – Don’t drink Guiness at that party and don’t kiss Spider… six months of hell on the school bus is NOT worth it. xoxo
Dear myself,
Dad was cheating on mom, but dont let her throw out the wedding dress.
take pictures of your room, its the last time its gonna be that way.
You were lied to, you hated college, but you’ll meet your husband, and one of your best friends there.
Shave your head now! The days with your pink mohawk were the best days of your life.
When you see ms O’conner in the milk section, spit on her, its your last chance.
take pictures every time you change your hair color, you’ll regret not remembering.
Remember to keep track of cathy, because nobody else will. Get her out of there, even if you have to adopt her yourself.
Send ms Dewie the roses you promised her
Dear 16 year old Jenni,
Keep on reading, keep on writing. I know you’re obsessed with poetry and it’s all good. Just keep on reading and writing because it’s all practice.
Be more daring with boys. It’s ok to flirt with them, maybe try some out….but then that might break the space-time continuum so maybe don’t do that.
You will find love. You will meet supportive and brilliant people. You will see Leonard Cohen perform live in concert!
Keep on doing what you do best, and remember that gossiping about other people might be fun but it has no good end result.
With love, 29-Jenni
dearest,
that knack you have for making someone else your world will more often than not leave you disappointed, so please remember to build up yourself before you try to invest all your love into another person who (by no fault of their own) may not have the capacity to love you the same way in return. poets almost never follow through with their words. don’t stress about being so lonely. you’re adored more than you realize. trust your parents, but don’t take them so seriously. the people you will finally be able to forgive, you should quickly forget. there is so much room in your life and so many wonderful people and opportunities to fill it with- don’t cling to the broken things that cannot be fixed. the new, good things will heal you more completely than old mess you try to reconcile. family can be grown, and nurtured, and established wherever you plant your feet with love.
welcome your future with joy, and unclench that little fist.
xoxoxoxox
angel
your amazing stay that way =]
trust me you still wont regret this four years from now
you shall live and you shall learn
Hey you, The lack of friends you had back then doesn’t exist. Your geeky awkwardness is now embraced. Your deepest dreams of an independent life, tons of love, and a life that makes you and only you happy is out there. Walk with your head up, smile at strangers, and laugh as much as you want. Your smile will grants wishes. Love, The Future You.
“Angelface,
You will start calling people by nicknames like the one I just used, which I know is terrifying. Kitsch? Bitch, please. You’ve got terrible skin & no money & that’s probably why you’ve got the attitude problem: because shit like that matters when you’re 14 & even later & you go to a school where everyone looks like an Abercrombie model, but actually they just shop there. So cutesy nicknames aren’t really your modus operandi, not really a good offensive play. I’m sure you find your sarcasm exceedingly droll & maybe even some other people do. Let up on that.
You are going to sit on the quad one night & convince yourself, with little to no proof, that this year, sophomore year, will be the best one ever. It won’t be.
You will not understand how everything could fall apart at once: S. going to rehab, B. sleeping with W. for $$, J. breaking up with C. & then going after you when you try to help pick up the pieces. M., E. & you will be suspended. F. will be expelled. N. will be both a nuisance & a godsend. You will want to die. You will be sent to therapy (it won’t really help). You’ll hate everything you ever loved.
Then one day, you won’t care. You will get up & go.
You’ll leave that place, with the plastic Aryan robots & their dramarama. It will be hard. You will miss a few people. Everyone else will fade silently into a funny anecedote, their actions & words made trivial & comical by your ability to review that past with 20/20 vision (by the way, you need glasses!)
S. will come back, be fine, lapse, love, be fine, lapse, love. That is another problem, but you’ll figure that out too. It will be hard. Fucking everything is hard. You’ll get it.
You’re not ready, but all these things will happen.
Don’t say you weren’t warned.
Most affectionately,
Alternate Dimension Post-High-School Sarah
P.S. Floss. I cannot overstate how much you will regret this later.
Ok…this is late…but…
Dear Baby Girl,
Oh my goodness darling. I want to give you a big bug hug – because I know its exactly what you need right now. Ok, now I’m giving you this hug there are some things I have to tell you. First – your worries my love, I understand why you are worrying and I wouldn’t want you to change one bit because that might affect how awesome you turn out, but…BUT...you need to know that everything your doing right now, every choice your making is exactly the right one. So please – let go of that anxiety, I see how much it hurts you to move through one day, worrying about how to sit and stand and talk and if this is ok or that’s ok. I know you feel like a fish out of water because everyone you know is rich and cool and beautiful too. But one day you will realise the truth – that it doesn’t matter how much money someone has or how little you have. How fat or thin you are because you are fabulous.
Also something I want to tell you – you don’t have to behave in a certain way in be a certain person because of your background. In a few years you’ll come back to school for reunions and realise that you have quite possibly ended up the most awesome person out of everyone you know. You’re going to do such things!!! Such glorious and amazing things – you will have so many friends, be so smart, be so adored and loved. And my goodness…MY GODNESS HOW BEAUTIFULL YOU WILL BECOME. Words cannot even express how glorious the years at University will be so hang on in there.
Watch yourself – you become a little arrogant because of all this at times, and a little dramatic because you have no idea how to cope with it all. So I’m giving you a heads up – be humble and read as much as you can about Buddhism. To be honest – your going to break some hearts and be a bit of a bitch, so if you can try not to be. Try not to burn bridges and listen to yourself more and other people less often.
Oh….
And by the way…
You live in Japan.
Ha! How awesome is that!?!!?!?!? At first its miserable – but ultimately you become the most amazing person because of it – you learn so much so quickly and you rock every second of you existence. I promise.
SO keep on keeping on.
(and oh my god the music you are going to hear!!)
Love,
Mizi chan xoxoxoxoxoxoxo
Hi Gala – who won – these letters are all so good!!
Sj
hi. late and new. but…
————
... you are not as cool, or as hot, as you think you are. your looks will fade, your hair will turn weirdly brown, and you’ll have a number of inches added to your stomach. you’ll cringe at hearing your boyfriend say that the years haven’t been good to you and that you were at your prettiest in high school. but it’s alright. because you will learn that beauty can be seen in more than just your smile, or the locks of your hair, or the curves of your ass. you will learn that pretty will not satisfy everybody but at the end of the day, the only one who looks at you in the mirror and judges you is yourself.
... you are not as smart as you think you are. your grades will go down, you will get confused with your majors, you won’t get the job you’re dreaming of getting today. you will learn that the world is a confusing place. that not all things can be explained by cold math or hard science. it’s gonna be hard but you learn to be harder. you’ll gonna ask yourself the tough questions and you’re gonna want to understand the answers you come up with because this is the only way you’re going to understand life.
... you are not as infallible as you think you are. your friends will bitch about you behind your back, your boyfriend will leave you for someone disgusting (don’t ask yourself why, he developed bad taste, apparently), your parents will be disappointed in the life you will be leading. and it IS alright. you are your best friend. you are your closest confidant. you will make it through. and you will learn to love yourself enough to trust your decisions. you are strong and you will live your life graciously.
don’t be too arrogant. don’t be too passive. high school is short. life is long. and it is full of surprises. celebrate it. it’s okay to cry sometimes.
(& gala.. been loving your site for months now. i think it’s amazing. i think you’re amazing. thanks for inspiring.)
hey babydoll! you are absolutely gorgeous, but hiding your cute little figure in tomboyish clothes aren’t going to do you any good. You are beautiful from your one-of-a-kind sense of humor to your big brown expressive eyes. Stop caring too much about what others think of you! You will have more fun and stres less. You will meet new people. Don’t shut them out. . .it’s ok—you will be judged. It’s a fact of life, and also a fact of life that not everyone will like you. So take risks and find out who you should be with. Besides, life is about the crazy yumminess that lives inside of us. It’s what makes life interesting—our ups, downs, ideas, fears. I know it’s all in you-don’t be scared-you’re made of tough stuff girl. You never imagined you would get the perfect guy or turn into an absolute beauty. Here them boys calling you now? They see the tomboy duckling has turned into a beautiful swan in character, personality, and style. Keep letting the sun shine in and keep up the positive attitude. You’ve been through a lot, been hurt a lot, but ultimately learned from everythign you’ve been through without regrets. You’re motto? Bring it on bitches!
I know this competition is long over.. But I want to write a list:
Dear little Nicole – Those lovely little crystals that Pat gave you aren’t just pretty rocks. Buy a Crystal bible and learn about them. They will change your life. – learn to “let it go, life’s too short” If someone is determined to think the worst of you no matter how saint like you are towards them, your never going to change their mind. They are the only person that can help themselves – When your trying with all your energy not to cry at school, work, in public generally. Remember to cry later in private. There’s a chemical and emotional release.. use it!!! – take more notice of your mother’s cooking. learn, ask questions – stand up for yourself when it comes to the way you want to live (cooking, exercising, recycling, tv programs) because otherwise you will become frustrated, resentful and fat. – dont use limewire… save up and buy the CD!! – save your money in general. When your 20 you will need to buy a new car becuase you got crashed into by someone un-insured. – work hard at school, boys arent going to help you get a law degree. – go work in a law firm to help you decide you dont want to be a lawyer anyway. – dont cut your hair so short at the end of highschool, you will regret it. – learn to open up to that cute, silly guy who will support you through anything. He may seem like a bad choice for a long time and the people closest to you may think the same. But you will stick with him despite feeling that way. Dont fight the love. He will go through alot of self discovery and become driven, stable and appreciative. He will help you get back on your feet and your relationship will be stronger than ever.
remember: Karma, what goes around comes around….
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