Umbrella Lurve!
[ 25 February 2008 ]
It’s getting very cold around here, so I thought it was a good time to present you with an assortment of the best-looking brollies I’ve found recently… as well as who I can imagine owning them.
The woman who loves the Haba Leafy Roof umbrella is actually an art teacher who found this umbrella left behind in one of her classes. She whistles through the gap between her front two teeth (mostly Bulgarian folk songs) & always wears red lipstick. She drinks tea constantly (earl grey with two sugars) & drives a puttery old car. Her husband used to throw knives in the circus & they sometimes incorporate this skill in the bedroom.
The girl under the Lotus umbrella makes cupcakes for a living & does her own deliveries. She straps the patisserie boxes to the back of her scooter & smiles as she pockets the cash. No one knows that the reason the cupcakes taste so good is because she says “I love you, I love you, I love you” to the mixture as she bakes.
The girl who owns the Guy de Jean Arlequin Duck umbrella works in a jewellery store & stands behind the counter so that no one will see her lace-up combat boots. Every night she goes home to her sulky boyfriend who wears more eyeliner than she does & hopes he will leave her so she doesn’t have to have “the conversation”. One day she would like to be a carefree bachelorette with a poodle & fairy wings tattooed on her back.
The girl who carries Madonna’s English Roses Houndstooth umbrella wears only black, white & grey. Her hair is big & violet, back-combed & scented like candy, & she likes to cover it with Swarovski crystals. She does Tai Chi in the mornings with her grandmother & keeps a secret stash of toffees in her bag at all times.
The Butterfly umbrella is the pride & joy of a raver girl who dances underneath it at the bus stop. When she goes out at night she ties glowsticks around the spokes of the umbrella & glows all the way across the city. She always wears purple underwear & has never had a boyfriend.
The Il Marchesato 16 Rib Metallic umbrella is owned by a fetish model who pays photographers to lengthen her legs in pictures & never makes public appearances. She has a closet full of platform boots & shoes of every stripe, & has not seen her natural hair colour in ten years. She has a secret crush on Michael Jackson.
The Birdcage Bubble umbrella belongs to a very straight-laced fashion editor who wears extremely high heels & never smiles in public. While she pretends that she doesn’t like the paparazzi taking shots of her, she owns a clear umbrella precisely to help them take more pictures. Every night she goes home & gets high while watching The Daily Show.
The Birdcage Spots Bubble umbrella is owned by a famous architect. He bought it in a drug-addled haze in San Francisco years ago. He has never taken it out in public. It sits in an umbrella stand by the back door, an untouched reminder of his past.
The girl who carries the Merde, Il Pleut umbrella (translation: Sh*t, it’s raining) is 5’10” in flat shoes. She wears a leather jacket at all times, & pinned to it, a badge with a quote from Jean-Paul Sartre (“Hell is other people”). She smokes Gauloises & has teeth stained slightly red from excess wine consumption. Her pet hate is running out of cheese. (She has secretly never left Chicago — & orders her Gauloises online.)
The girl toting the Jean Paul Gaultier Square Faux Leather umbrella prides herself on her sleek, minimal aesthetic. Her favourite movie is Bladerunner & she refuses to wear anything but black. Her work cubicle is so clean that her co-workers think she is a bit freaky. Sometimes when she is feeling anxious, she fashions a helmet out of aluminium foil & sleeps in it.
The girl strolling beneath the Pasotti Swarovski Crystal umbrella is a theatre major with bright red hair. She loves to practise her Oscars award speech & buy foreign newspapers (which then gather dust on her coffee table). She always checks into hotel rooms under the name ‘Jessica Rabbit’.
Hyper-love & bunny kisses,
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i wish i made cupcakes for a living :)
I really want the last umbrella! So pretty! ♥♥
Oh Gala i love these articles! This and the one you did with the irregular choice shoes are amazing. I love the colourful characters you paint a picture of in my head! I would love to read a novel written by you. xx
Oooh I love fancy umbrellas and have always wanted one! Unfortunately, where I live it’s SO windy that a fancy umbrella would be both an unwise investment and an inevitable source of all-too-soon heartbreak. But Gala, your fashion characters always delight me.
Oops sorry for commenting twice, But I am in love with my umbrella I purchased last winter ; It is hot pink with gas masks printed all over it. Unfortunately because I live in Wellington, I barely ever used it for fear of the wind demolishing it!
I agree with Pinky,
You create lovely characters Gala.
Where’s your novel? :)
I don’t make time to write fiction any more! Plus, I prefer description to story-telling… I’m always like, ‘Plot? Bah, humbug! Can I just write about her penchant for drinking tea in the sunlight & how she does her braids?‘
Oh, umbrellas. They’re all so adorable. I’m just sad that it never rains where I live.
This is the most greatest post ever!
Oh Gala, I simply adore thinking of the people who own these umbrellas!
I want to be the Lotus Umbrella girl, and I’d like to date the Houndstooth girl. How could anyone resist a girl with violet hair who smells like candy?!
Cuuuuuute! I want the last umbrella too Sophie, le swoon!
Gala, you should team up with an kick ass illustrator & write a book called Gala’s Girls & just write wonderful profiles on a bunch of characters, no plot required! I would buy it. :) x
I love funky umbrellas! The Butterfly and ‘merde..’ ones are so cool!! Your characters sound so real & i want to befriend the raver girl!
BTW Gala, i’m the same with plots, i hate creating them. i would prefer it if someone gave me a plot and let me fill in the details, i could probably write something fantastic then. =D
Felicity — That is an amazing idea…
If you don’t like plot you should write poetry, Gala.
I get criticized in all of my writing classes for my fiction turning out to be more of a long poem than anything.
I think it’s prettier that way.
I used to write lots of prose-type stuff, I have notebooks full of it. But now I write iCiNG all day & just don’t have much interest in any other writing!
shucks i love the merde,il pleut umbrella.
simple and says it all!
p.s gala ive noticed you mention bladerunner quite a lot,in fact it’s one of my fave movies of all time aswell!just the feeling you get from it is unusual..
love it :)
Oh, that was too cute. I love those first two – incidentally, I am slightly art-teacher-crazy-ish, and I love to bake cupcakes and give them to people!
I adore your imagination – this was such a fun article to read, and the umbrellas are so pretty!
Yeah, I like Felicity’s idea too . . . the more I think about it the better it gets! It would be the most rich and useful source of inspiration. I’d like a hard copy, pocket-size please. :D
Oh gala please oh please make “Gala’s Girls”!
That article is the most enjoyable I’ve ever read!! I adore painting pictures in my head!
I’m so thrilled about it I can’t help but to use exclamation marks!
Hello. You Rule. It’s True. The End.
Lovely, lovely, lovely!
It’s been raining all this week in California, I sure could use one of these; I love the “Merde Il Pleut” brollie!
I own the butterfly one! I have to admit that I do not fit the description. But I am quite happy with myself so that’s okay!
No, Gala, what I think you should do is write a whole book on Gala’s Guide to Life, sort of like the blog but in book form. And include Gala’s Girls in it. There’s this blog called yarnstorm.blogs.com and the woman who writes it did her blog in book form. And it sold pretty well, I think, because they’re coming out with it in book form.
Although let me tell you, her blog is SO different from yours.
ENNA- you can still use umbrellas, even if it doesn’t rain where you live! just make it fit to your outfit, or maby even combine your clothes to fit a fancy unbrella. let it be:) just have some fun, dres up. and if it doesn’t rain, probably it’s always sunny&hot- what about sun protection umbrellas?
FELICITY- i would buy it to.
i’ve got the clear bircage bubble umbrella..but i’m nothing like she is. i like to smile lots. but i also like pictures.
isn’t it fun to come up with back stories for people you don’t know or who don’t exist?
Some of those are sooo beautiful!
Im really fond of number 2 gala! Do you like cigarettes? They remind me of 50’s glamour.
Oh gosh that was a good read.
My umbrella is actually a cross between two of these! It’s like the Birdcage Bubble except without the black edge. It has written repeatedly along the rim: “Oh sh*t, it’s raining!”.
That was so nice to read after a long dreary flight away from home :D you’re awesome, you know that, right? It’s like FLB but better, IMO.
xx
gala darling you are too fantastic to be true
My dear, you’ve almost got Merde, Il Pleut right. Except my pet hate is dirty dishwater and I smoke Dunhills.
Very close, though. Lovely article.
Hehe, the girl with the Swarovski crystal studded umbrella sounds a little like me. I have a brilliant red Jessica Rabbit wig, and I was actually named after her. I’m an English major who loves to write postcards to strangers though.
My own umbrella is a 1960’s white frilly parasol!
Now I want to go Umbrella shopping! You seriously do have the wildest imagination… and I love it! Nobody else could write an article about umbrellas and make it sound so wonderful :)
I can find your personality in every umbrella.
xxx
Hey Gala, Just thought you might want to know…I’ve noticed your picture in a eating disorder / thinspo community on livejournal…didnt know how you would feel about it…
Email me if you want the link
xo
Danique — Yup, I already know, but as I’m not a member of the community I can’t see it or do anything about it. It’s weird & unpleasant but what can you do?
Haha the third one is most suited to me. I would try to avoid dating a guy who wore more eyeliner than me, though, because that would be an awful lot. I have been considering wing tatts, though. And it’s my favourite brolly of them all.
Which one is most suited to you, Gala?
xx
I love umbrellas for kids. They’re my guilty pleasure. Now, if only it’d rain in California! Let it rain!
This is so ridiculously adorable! What an awesome entry! I want every single one of those umbrellas!
As for Felicity’s book idea… let us know if you are ever on the lookout for an illustrator… ;)
My Nan bought me a Dome Brolly for christmas (Like the birdcage one.)
It’s the best Brolly ever!!!! It keeps you dry, and it’s oh-so stylish! :)
In town, everyone looks at me, like, ‘oh my god, she has a dome brolly!!’
B)
hehe.
I love those umbrellas , Gala. The polka dot one is cute.
x Lucy
this post is amazing! I would love to be in your thoughts one day :)
(true story) my friend nina made an art project out of umbrellas, to which she attached glass test tube type things with holes in them which were all differently shaped in such a way that they made different tones as the water poured out of them, so that it made a symphony when it rained..
my last umbrella cost $2 and was light blue with hello kitty faces on it and it broke!
I defently think kids umbrellas from places like Gas make super cute alternatives to the black fold away types.
I love this post! It’s been raining constantly for the last for months here (well, I’m only like 10% exaggerating …) and those umbrellas really cheer me up! My favourite is the “Merde il pleut” one, because it’s red and expresses my feelings of late quite well … I also love the Swarowski one, so beautiful and dramatic! (I also love Jessica Rabbit … coincidence?! ;-))
Oh, I love it when you write the stories of the people you imagine owning the items. It’s so original & fun to read. Honestly, you’re brilliant!
I second Felicity’s super idea!~
xxo
the birdcage story reminds me a little of myself and makes me a little sad. these are all such delectable little icing-droplets of imaginative sweetness that it never fails to surprise me that you are just as colorful as any of your characters. i remember when you did one of these for shoes… and i completely fell in love with your baby marie antoinette. for this round, it’s the houndstooth girl hands down.
I have a purple one I got at a rummage sale for 50 cents. When I got it, it had a name tag sewed in it. I had fun imagining what kind of uptight fussy lady (or man) would put a name tag in their umbrella.
Gala, these are my favorite type of posts! Please do more! I simply love the “Merde, Il Pleut!” umbrella. You’re so imaginative and my day is brighter when you write a new post!
i am loving your stories behind these umbrellas! my current umbrella is black with hot pink frills around the edges :)
Oh I love these! love your descriptions they’re so imaginative! I spent all day staring at people’s umbrellas.
I always carry children’s umbrellas because a) Kids get the best stuff and b)They’re great for one and I am a selfish little bugger and don’t want to share!
My favourite is a long pink frilly one with Marie from the Aristocats on it that I bought from a kids H&M bit in Germany a few years back.
I wonder what you’d think about me if you saw that! I
Oooh, you should definitely do more of these posts! One about umbrellas and one about shoes will only make us yearn for more ;) Felicity’s idea of a book will sate our thirst for your imaginative prose…
I really want the Guy de Jean Arlequin Duck umbrella and the Madonna’s English Rose and the last one! Eeep, the consumerism!
I want the Jean Paul Gaultier Square Faux Leather umbrella. Love.
I was feeling slightly glum this morning and this totally gave me the push I needed to change my attitude and turn it around. The stories were so much fun to read, I really enjoyed them. Thanks for the laugh…it’s going to be a fun day!
you are really hilarious, and indeed, good at developing characters.
i have a yellow duck themed umbrella, with a cute little duck head for a handle (thrifted – $1.00)
Hey Gala! Just wondering, was it you that had a super mushroom necklace?
i love love love the little stories :D xxx
I love these so much!!
i love imagining these characters in my head. i want to bring them to life in my sketchpad!
Pinar — Yup, that was me! I sold it on Ebay :>
This is was so delicous to read! Very creative, Gala :]
Gala, what a great way to start my day. I love the umbrella collection, but your characters even more. This is something I love to do when bored and people watching.Particularly on a train. There are great characters here in Melbourne. Everyone has a story. I wonder if any of those I watch are even remotely like the stories I give them?
i second felicity’s idea!!
i love when you post character sketches :D next time you see a collection of cute stuff you like, don’t hesitate to write up another thing like this!
Even though I live in Wellington so it’s never calm enough to use an umbrella I bought the coolest one on Saturday from Redcurrent with a Christmas voucher. It’s the most expensive umbrella I’ve ever owned (at $40 on sale) but it’s SO cool, even my relatively straight laced boyfriend thinks so. Its got a long black tip and then its a bright pinky purpley colour with black ruffles around the edge and a curved black handle. I LOVE it!
Oh Gala, you know about the Bulgarian folk music? OOOO: Im frim Bulgaria annnd i want to tell you that i can believe that you know about the bulgarian folk music, really ahahah
I like Felicity’s idea!!! =]
I have an uber bright pink umbrella Santa brought me for Christmas a few years ago.
I didn’t ask for one. I guess Santa was tired of me stealing my mothers umbrellas out of her car…
But I love it.
I am so buying the lotus umbrella. Thank you so much. Don’t you think umbrellas ae quite possibly the cutest of all accessories?
Oh my god I have such an umbrella fetish! I used to have this lovely one with Monet’s ballerinas on it! It broke sadly. Now I am deeply in love with my clear, pink rimmed one:), much like the one here, but I smile in public heh
I must have the Merde, il pleut! one! Eeek!
Err oops I meant Degas! pardon me
I love the two bubble umbrellas and the one with the crystals. my current umbrella is a leopard print one from walmart i used to have a pretty polka dot one i dont what happened to it
I love it so much when you write these articles! You must do more.
My favorite is the “MERDE IL PLEUT” umbrella. So clever.
Oh my! I could of used this post last Saturday night when I got disgustingly soaked on the way home, oh no my poor clothes :(.
In love with the Merde, Il Pleut umbrella, might have to be a daily desire!
omg. the descriptions of the people who own the umbrellas are amazing! i can imagine them so well… wow. so wonderful, thank you!
eep! Those are some gorgeous umbrellas!!
Oh, I love these umbrellas! I especially like that they’re all the long, curved handled ones instead of those (in my opinion) slightly less classy portable ones. Although super easy to store, they just don’t look as good!
One day, when I move to Seattle, I am going to get me that “Merde, Il pleut” umbrella. And galoshes!
I have the Birdcage Bubble Umbrella! Well, one in the same style anyway ;) And living in Wellington, NZ where it is normally tooooo windy for one, it is perfect! The way it comes down over my head to my shoulders makes it less likely to blow inside out! But as for personality…I am more like the crazy art teacher with the gap in her teeth.
- Although I would love to wear super high heels everyday and not have my feet kill me for it!!
xx
I definitely bought that “merde il pleut” in black several months back! And, though I am a mere 5’2 and don’t wear leather, the rest of the description is actually dead on.
Hilarious. Love!
Gala, I love this article!and the umbrellas of course…my faves are the ‘merde il pleut’ and the square one, even though i don’t really share many of the features of the 2 owners:) i drink heavily-sugared earl grey all the time though!should i marry a knife thrower?!anyway, thanks to this post i know what my first self-present will be as soon as i move to rainy ireland!:)
PS DO think about writing Gala’s Girls!that’s such a neat idea and I love characters descriptions…I think they make up more than 50% of how good a book is..and your are awesome even just by themselves!
Damn you! I really want one of those right now.
i really loved this article, you should do more more more! it reminds me of a game i used to play when i was in high school. i had art class with 2 of my best friends & we would make up stories [what their favorite thing to do is, what their childhood was like, etc.] about people we didn’t know [like substitute teachers or whatever].
& i love that square umbrella & the oh shit one. i’d love to get one but i just can’t afford it…though it would be a decent investment considering the fact that it rains a lot in san francisco.
It was raining today, and while I was standind in the bus stop, I had time to notice how much an umbrella can tell about its owner. It was funny, haha ^^
Im so glad you posted this link agian i have been looking everywhere for it as i have allways remembered the Merd il Pleut umbrella but i could never remeber how you spelt the french ( im guessing) writing. i think it’s hilarious and i’m deffiantly wanting to buy a pretty red umbrella and write those words on it. Luckly the rainy season isn’t over yet =]
I’m making myself quite the collection of umbrellas, a tiger one (complete with ears), a panda one (same there!) & a clear plastic one, possibly the beginning of a complete umbrella fetish.
Ahh I want that Merde,Il Pleut umbrella (:
The characters that you make up to go with things are always so fascinating, and they always make me feel happy no matter what mood.
Oh Gala!
I am a true brolly addict!
I cherished a lotus and bee (brolly number two) for about two months before it broke! I may have cried. I may also have refused (to this day) to throw it out because seeing it in the trash would break my poor heart!