18 October 2007, 17:11
It’s a cheesy old adage, but it’s true. Wherever you go, there you are. What does it mean?
It means that if you don’t like yourself, or you haven’t made peace with yourself for things you’ve done in the past, you will be dealing with that baggage forever. So many people say they hate the city they live in, that they can’t wait to move to (fill-in-the-gap), & then a few months later… It’s the same old story. They don’t like (fill-in-the-gap) any more. They want to go somewhere else.
As we move from city to city, place to place, the one constant is us. Once the newness & excitement of moving has worn off, we often find that we are depressed again. We still dislike people. We still hate work. Our relationship still drains our energy & happiness. We still binge eat or drink too much or fritter our money away. If we don’t change anything about ourselves, we just take whatever is inside us wherever we go.
You might think Oakland sucks, but shifting your physical location is not going to change who you are. It will change your life in trivial ways, but not you. You are a crucial part of the equation. You dictate how you feel & why. Wherever you go, there you are.
Learn to love yourself & the place you are in. No city is perfect — they’re much like people in that way. People & cities have both brilliance & flaws. The trick is in accepting them for what they are, working around the challenges, finding out a way to use the flaws to your advantage & learning to generate your own happiness.
Happiness is an inside job, & one that only you alone can work on.
There is nothing wrong with wanting to move to another place, that is part of progression & evolution & the thrill of starting fresh. But if you can learn to appreciate where you live now, & all the small, seemingly insignificant but wholly beautiful things which make up your life, your days will be filled with joy & beauty.