Empty bellies do not beget genius.

& as I kept staring, I started to feel like this…

(Purple Pieman)

I walked out of the salon feeling like a bit of a freak, & as soon as I got home I grabbed my cleanser, squirted some on a cotton pad & gave my eyebrows a good scrub. Quite a bit of the colour on the skin came off, which was awesome, & when my boyfriend came home, he told me it looked great!

The result…

Purple-tastic! Ah! I love it!

Kat did an awesome job, she was absolutely perfect. She was totally “safety first!” which eased my fears a lot — I like my eyes & getting bleach in them would be a bit of a bummer, to say the least. I was also her only client at the time, which meant she could attend to me immediately if there were any problems. I think Wildilocks are now officially offering this service to anyone who’s game, so if you have a shock of neon hair & you’d like eyebrows to match, give them a tinkle!

They’re still a bit stronger than I am used to, but honestly, I don’t think that’s obvious to anyone but me. (I spend a lot of time examining myself up close in a mirror!) Plus, it’s easy to play them down a bit by just wearing a bit more eye make-up than usual. It has taken me a little while to adapt, but it’s the same for any kind of cosmetic change — it always takes a while for your mind to catch up with your reflection.

So, hello! I have purple eyebrows! Whee! I’m so happy with them — I look like a natural purplehead! Do you like ‘em?

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Jem-Inspired Makeover!

[ 16 April 2008, 03:42 ]

What happens when you & your make-up artist friend have a free afternoon?

Why, you make a mess with glitter & highly pigmented eye-shadow, of course!

Initially, we were aiming for a Jem & The Holograms look, but after perusing some galleries online, decided that lightning bolts on the cheeks (etc.) was a bit much for a Wednesday…

Instead, we did a “normal” eye, complete with false eyelashes (Marie glued those Swarovski crystals on herself, pretty clever huh?), & a huge pink & iridescent glitter star over the other eye. Unfortunately it was hard to get photos of…

I think it all turned out pretty well, though!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How Hirsute Are You?!

[ 28 March 2008, 16:40 ]

Photo by Sinsong.

“What have you found the be the best solution for facial hair? I don’t mean advice on how to grow a beard, more like how to remove that irritating little strip of hair on the upper lip. I’ve used bleach, then moved on to a cream hair remover, and am now thinking about getting it professionally waxed. I have my hesitations though. In the past month I got a monroe piercing, and don’t feel too comfortable with someone dripping hot wax around it, followed by possibly yanking it out! While I would love to just get some sort of laser surgery and never have to worry about it again, it’s not really in my price range. So, possibly with the help of your readers, what is the best method for facial hair removal?”

Ahhh yes, facial hair. Moustaches & chin hair & other unsightly sproutings, otherwise known as the bane of women everywhere! (Well, except for JD Samson from Le Tigre…)

Your removal method will depend on your growth. For this reason, I have devised a little quiz…

When I look in the mirror, I…
Notice a little bit of fuzz if I lean in close & squint (1 point)
Can see little dark bits at either corner of my mouth (2 points)
Have to stand back so my moustache doesn’t touch the glass (3 points)

My normal hair removal method is…
Not applicable — I don’t need to do anything to it (1 point)
Cream bleach or hair remover (2 points)
Lawnmower/prayer (3 points)

My facial hair has impacted on my life in the following way:
I don’t think it has (1 point)
My boyfriend once mentioned it so I keep it in check (2 points)
I was offered the part of “bearded lady” in my school play… every year (3 points)

Your score

Between 1 & 3 points: Glabrous Gal
Lucky you! You have a minimal amount of facial fuzz & so you’re in the enviable position of not having to do anything to keep your upper lip looking luscious.

If you have a little bit of what they call “peach fuzz” (this is normal, by the way), don’t be tempted to shave, wax or otherwise fiddle about with it — while some people think this doesn’t affect the thickness or darkness of the hair, others swear up & down that it will forever alter the way it grows. If you can stay hassle-free, do! It’s not worth it!

Between 4 & 6 points: Sprouting Sweetheart
You probably have a few dark hairs on your upper lip. Before you start despairing, rest assured that you have many options, among them bleaching, waxing, threading, cream hair removal & electrolysis.

Bleaching & cream hair removal are both things you can do at home with kits from the supermarket. It takes less than ten minutes & is a very easy way to get rid of your mo. However, depilatory cream can make you feel a bit “stubbly” as it grows back, which isn’t a great aphrodisiac. Also, if your skin is quite dark, think before you bleach your hair! Some bleaches turn the hair totally white, while others (like Sally Hansen) come in a few different tones to match the skin. When it comes to either of these hair removal methods, be sure to buy a gentle brand (again, Sally Hansen is good), because the formulas can be quite harsh on sensitive skin.

A lot of people swear by threading (which is also great for eyebrows) as a removal technique, which pulls the hair out entirely but is more gentle than waxing.

Waxing is probably the most painful route, but also the most popular! It lasts a long time, about 3 or 4 weeks, but reactions to waxing are common (such as breaking out all over the waxed area) — so if you’ve ever had a bad reaction to a wax before, you might want to try beeswax or an alternative method of hair removal.

Electrolysis is the permanent option, & works by sending an electrical pulse down the hair follicle. You will usually need between 4 & 6 sessions to see results. It is the most expensive option, but also the most effective. Be sure to research a good salon before you have it done, as it is a fairly serious procedure & can result in scarring when done improperly.

If you only have the occasional dark hair, a pair of tweezers might be your best friend!

Beyond 7 points: Piliferous Paramour
If you feel more fuzzy than fabulous, don’t worry! You are not alone! There are lots of things you can do to counter your hair growth.

Cream hair removal, waxing, threading & electrolysis are all excellent options for you. I would recommend electrolysis first of all, since after only a few (usually between 4 & 6) sessions, you should find the hair growth has stopped entirely — meaning you never have to think about it again! Hallelujah!

Waxing & threading would be joint second runners-up in terms of recommendation, since they remove the entire hair follicle, allowing you three to four weeks of hairless bliss.

Cream hair removal or depilatory cream is also an option, though it will require more upkeep than any of the other methods. On the plus side, it’s something you can do at home.

Women with dark upper lip hair often find themselves sprouting on the sides of their faces & chins, too. Whether you choose to remove all of the hair or only some, it’s worth talking to a great beautician to see what they can do for you.

Hirsuitism is actually a medical term & can be a symptom of some kind of disease, like Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) or some other adrenal-linked medical condition, so if you’re worried about it, you might want to get it checked out. Usually though, plentiful dark facial hair is just the result of having fabulous Middle Eastern or Mediterranean women in your family tree!

Having said all of this, what you decide to do (or not do) about your facial hair is your choice. There’s no reason why you can’t just rock it like Frida Kahlo!

P.S. If you’re feeling down on your fuzzy foliage, check out Flickr’s Hot Girl Mustache & fake moustachioed girls groups!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Problem Skin

[ 17 March 2008, 16:15 ]

Photo by Chris Maverick

“My skin has really been getting me down lately – I’m 15 and it was perfect before getting spots a few years ago. Now, it’s a disaster. I’ve got enlarged pores, under-skin spots (that never surface and don’t hurt), an un-even skin tone and very minor acne marks/scars. How can I get my perfect skin back? Has it been ruined? I use M·A·C Studio Fix, but on my problem skin it just looks caked on and obvious so I don’t wear it too often… I cleanse, tone and moisturise with Simple products and exfoliate once a week. My diet isn’t bad at all either – I eat quite a lot of fruit and veg and hardly any sugar but I still break out. One thing I can think of is I do smoke… Could this cause such a problem with my skin? If so – I’m quitting starting today!”

Well, I would say that the biggest contributor to your spots at the moment is hormones. You’re 15, which is pretty much when your raging hormones are at their peak. Unfortunately, as a teenager, there’s not much you can do about that — they have to run their course. The good news is that being a teenager doesn’t last forever, so in a few years you should be back to your fabulous self.

Having said that, if you want to make your concealer look a bit more natural, use primer on your face first, then dab it on any offending areas & blend it like mad. It is easiest to do this with a brush. If you have spots, remember to clean your brushes regularly or you might just spread more bacteria around!

It sounds like you’re doing pretty good things for your skin, but a couple of minor tweaks should improve things a lot. You still might get spots, but this will make it easier for your body to deal with them. They won’t last as long & they will clear up more easily.

Here’s my guide to clearing up problem skin!

Get super-hydrated & eat more vegetables & fruit — raw if possible
All that stuff about how “you are what you eat” is 100% true. If you eat & drink things that are good for your body, rather than what is just cheap/easy/quick, you will see it manifest physically through your skin & body.

Lots of water doesn’t keep the outside of your skin moist, but it does keep your insides hydrated — & it’s hard to look beautiful when the inside of your body is desperately fighting off corn syrup, caffeine & alcohol! You really can’t drink enough water (unless you’re one of those demented frat boys who has water-chugging competitions!), so keep a huge glass or bottle by your side & fill it constantly. Yes, you will go to the bathroom a lot, but every time you do that, water is passing through your system & clearing out toxins. It all results in a happier body, clearer mind & cheerier disposition! Just call me I.P. Freely!

Raw fruit & vegetables are full of water, fibre & protein (as well as about a billion other great things), & eating them in decent quantities will make you feel & look absolutely phenomenal. It’s no coincidence that my skin is perfect when I eat raw. Eating fruit or vegetables in their natural form is best for you, since it preserves the most nutrients. If you cook them too much, you destroy most of the good stuff, so if you can’t hack it raw, try lightly steaming or quickly stir-frying them instead. If you want to transition to raw, it’s not that hard — & I’m going to write an article on it soon!

You might also want to look into giving dairy the flick: a study of almost 50,000 women showed that drinking milk increases the risk of severe acne. Major acne was 22% more prevalent in the group of women sampled who had the highest intake of dairy (more than 3 glasses of milk a day). This is most likely because the steroid hormones & other components in dairy suppress your immune system, meaning it can’t fight infections. Ouch!

They say happiness is an inside job. I strongly believe that beauty is, too.

Make sure you wash your pillowcase regularly
Think about it — you press your face against that sucker all night, every night! If it’s covered in sweat, old make-up & god knows what other bodily fluids, of course that is going to create problems! There’s no point in washing your face before you go to bed if you’re just going to bury it in a pile of filth for the next 8 hours! Okay, so, you get my point. Wash your pillowcase! When was the last time you did? I don’t think anyone really does it often enough. Chuck it in the washing machine at least once a week.

You might like to investigate your washing powder, too — get the gentlest thing you can, because harsh cleaners might aggravate your skin, too.

Cleanse, tone & moisturise every day, & exfoliate once or twice a week
You’ve all heard this before, but it’s really important. Go & get yourself some proper skincare products — you heard me! No soap! Dear god, no soap! The skin on your face is delicate & it’s the first place to show age, so you need to take care of it! Don’t come crying to me when you have an “it bag” where your face should be!

What you use will be different depending on your skin-type, but here are some ideas. I love my routine at the moment & don’t want to alter it at all. In the morning I use Simple Purifying Cleansing Lotion, apple cider vinegar + purified water, Christian Dior Capture Essential serum (face & eyes) & Nivea Soft. In the evening I remove my make-up with a baby wipe & moisturise again.

If you’re keen to change up your products, read How To Adopt A New Skincare Routine!

Use AHAs
AHA stands for alpha hydroxy acid, & yes, it is actually acid. While it sounds crazy to use it on your face, the sort you buy from beauty spas & pharmacies has a very low concentration. It works as an exfoliator, & helps get rid of the old dead cells. It improves the appearance of wrinkles, roughness & mottled pigmentation, as well as giving you a smoother over-all look.

I occasionally use a product by Ultraceuticals called Even Tone Serum & when I use it, I can definitely see the difference. It helps stop a spot dead in its tracks!

You should know, though, that if you’re using AHAs on a regular basis you must wear sunscreen, as using them makes you more susceptible to the sun’s effects. Of course, you should be using sunscreen anyway, but even moreso if you’re an AHA kid!

Quit smoking!
Smoking is terrible for the skin. As well as causing impotence & well, death, it also ages you like mad. The cumulative effect of inhaling all those chemicals is that the tiny blood vessels in the outermost layer of the skin get constricted. This decreases blood flow enormously, as well as starving the skin of oxygen & nutrients. This damages the elastin & collagen in your skin, meaning you lose strength & elasticity. So your skin will hang down & be all droopy, & there’s nothing you can do about it!

Additionally, people who smoke always make the same movements with their face when they do it — so they might purse their lips when they inhale or squint their eyes to stop smoke from going in them. Doing this repeatedly causes wrinkles — not pretty ones, either. You will end up with a mouth like a cat’s bum! Not luscious!

There’s nothing wrong with having an occasional cigarette, but if you’re smoking regularly & often, you will look aged way before your time. No one wants that.

Don’t pick!
Don’t pick, squeeze or otherwise frig about with your face. If you have an ugly pimple brewing, chuck some AHA at it, but if that doesn’t seem to quell the beastie, you have permission to squeeze it. Just make sure you do it with clean hands, & make sure you remove any last traces of anything yucky that you might have smeared about. Read this for the low-down on popping a pimple.

I’m grossing myself out! Remind me never to write about this again!

See a dermatologist
This should be the last thing you do if nothing else works — I am all for natural (& free!) solutions to problems! However, there are a lot of people who finally visit a dermatologist after years of horrific acne & swear that it changed their life. From what I understand, you usually need a referral from your doctor, but after that it is smooth sailing.

Having said that, before you start a course of treatment, I would recommend that you always research the side effects of anything prescribed to you. It might disturb you to find out that there is a link between using Roaccutane, depression & suicide, for example. Have a read of Some Side Effects Of Acne Medications & this article from The Daily Mail, get informed & make your own decisions.

Here’s to spot-free fabulousness! Ring-a-ding-ding!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Fix A Terrible Haircut

[ 14 March 2008, 21:12 ]

A bad haircut: unfortunately, it happens more often than it should.

So, what can you do when your hair ends up shorter on one side than on the other? Or if your fringe is about 3 centimetres too high? Or if your hairdresser, who refused to listen to you, snipped off all the volume & bounce you’d been growing out for months?

Trot back to the hairdresser
This is the first & most obvious solution, though it is one a lot of people never try. Sometimes because they fear the wrath of the hairdresser (very sharp scissors strike terror into the hearts of many!), but usually just because we feel uncomfortable or awkward telling someone that what they’ve done isn’t up to scratch. I understand, I’ve been there — but it’s really important that we learn to say “This isn’t good enough” without worrying about hurting someone’s feelings or having someone dislike us. You don’t have to stomp in there & make a scene; it’s about being assertive. Most hairdressers are good sorts & they want to do their best, so if you go in & have a quiet word, chances are extremely good that they’ll make every effort to fix up your hair & please you.

Think about it this way: you’ve paid the money, so you should get what you want. If you bought a vacuum cleaner & it stopped working, you’d take it back, right? You wouldn’t sit around at home feeling bad about it & chewing your nails into oblivion while deepening your worry-lines!

It’s a simple business transaction, & it’s a good way to practise letting someone else know what you want. (If you can’t tell a hairdresser, how are you going to tell your spouse or employer?) If you want to have a good relationship with the person who cuts your hair, you need to be honest & let them know if something isn’t working. They want your business, so it’s in their best interests to help you.

On the other hand, if the haircut is so bad that you daren’t go back for fear you end up bald, perhaps the next step is for you!

Go somewhere else
It depends on the haircut, but sometimes the only thing to do is rush somewhere else & beg them to fix your mane. If it’s really, really bad, you might want to do it straight away, but if it’s bad-but-tolerable, give it a couple of weeks to grow out before you sit back down in the coiffeur’s chair.

Now, this is one time you really don’t want to skimp on a haircut. You’ve just had your tresses butchered, so don’t take any chances. Go somewhere with a great reputation — your mileage may vary, but it’s hard to go wrong with the likes of Toni & Guy, Frédéric Fekkai or Vidal Sassoon. In fact, if you go somewhere really great, you may start to regard your bad haircut as one of the best things that has ever happened to you!

When you go in, tell them what happened. Give them some guidance — let them know what you actually wanted from your haircut initially. Then cross your fingers.

Buy some product & spend some time in front of the mirror
Sometimes you can fix a terrible do just by styling it differently. For example, if your fringe has been chopped so high that you look like an alien, maybe if you sweep it back off your forehead, you can make it look acceptable. You may find that you need to wear your hair differently in order to look sane, which is undoubtedly annoying & an inconvenience, but hey. Maybe it’s time for a change, anyway?

Try not to freak out about it too much, & don’t be afraid of looking different. Surely if you’ve had your hair the same way for 5 years, it’s time to do something new!

If you’re having trouble coming up with a new style, call a friend & tell them to come over with their GHD & all the hair product they can muster!

Go hat shopping
My friend Ana is very keen on giving herself haircuts whenever the fancy strikes her. Generally she manages to restrain herself from doing too much damage, but once, she went too far. She hacked her hair so short that she looked like she’d just escaped from a lab experiment. It was a bad look. Ana is a stylish girl but even she didn’t know how to style or fix something so appalling.

Luckily, Ana is a fashion designer — & very handy with a sewing machine. She found some crazy faux fur fabric which was black & white with long strands of fur rather than the short stuff, & sewed it into a hat-shape. It looked great & because the pieces of fur were so long, she could kind of style them — pulling them up & out, twirling them around, etc. She called it her “wig” & she wore it for three months straight.

While you don’t necessarily have to make your own hat, going on a bit of a search for some cute hats that will save your dignity is a very good idea. You might like to buy a few different ones — a slouchy beanie, a fluffy beret, a fedora, a couple of turbans… There are no rules on what you can or cannot wear (& these days, thankfully, it’s socially acceptable for women to wear hats indoors), so have a hunt around & see what you can find!

Invest in a bunch of different scarves
“Hand me my scarf!” This is usually my default response to a bad hair day. I actually have a huge drawer full of them, overflowing with different colours, patterns & fabrics. You can never have enough scarves, & they are fantastically versatile.

Just lay it over the front of your hair & tie it behind your head, or you can fold it into more of a bandanna style if you like. There’s more information here!

Buy lovely accessories
It’s always fun to buy new things to put in your hair, & having a bad haircut is as good an excuse as any to go hunting for something fabulous! Investigate headbands with big bows on the side, huge diamanté slides, miniature tiaras, clips with cupcakes on & sparkly hair-ties. Splash out, go nuts — often, distracting onlookers with a huge glinting gee-gaw will mean they don’t even notice your botched haircut!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Fafi For MAC Cosmetics -- Reviews

[ 19 February 2008, 20:46 ]

On Monday, I received a FedEx package that made me yelp with excitement. It was a box from a PR company in New York. It said “MAC Cosmetics” on the outside. I thought, “Pffft, it couldn’t be. I bet someone wrote that just to get my attention!” But when I ripped it open in the elevator & looked inside, my heart started pounding. My hands trembled. I think I perspired a little bit. I ran down the corridor at full speed & started hollering excitedly at my boyfriend. Yes, I am a true MAC addict — these are the signs. It can get ugly!

I am now the proud owner of 29 pieces from the Fafi for MAC collection. Yes, that is a totally obscene amount of loot. More than anyone could ever need. Have I told you recently that I love my job?

They really couldn’t have sent this stuff to a more die-hard MAC fan. When I was about 15, I went to their counter (in Kirkcaldies) & bought my first piece of make-up with my own money. It was a powder foundation compact, & I was never the same again. Suddenly my skin-tone was even to the eye & silky to the touch. I became obsessed, so much so that my mother knows that the #1 thing to buy me at Christmas or on birthdays is anything from MAC. I have always had such good experiences with them that I have never felt the need to go anywhere else. I occasionally dabble in Napoleon Perdis but I always find my way back to that sleek counter with its metal stands & black-clad make-up artists. & I am never disappointed.

I’m so pleased to be able to review all these things for you, because (other than the fact that it is fun to use all this stuff) a lot of the colours defy appearances. Some of you might remember (in my first Fafi for MAC post) me proclaiming my love for Fun ‘N’ Sexy lipstick, but saying I wouldn’t buy it because the colour was just too much. Imagine my delight when I discovered that actually, it’s a gorgeous, sheer colour with not too much saturation or sparkle — extremely wearable & possibly my favourite lipstick of the bunch.

My friend & make-up artist Marie came over yesterday to play with all my new treats. We decided to try replicating some of the Fafi ‘looks’ from the collection. Here’s how it turned out.

Gala models ‘Fafi’.

The Fafi look is so dynamic on paper, I fell in love with it right away! I love the eye make-up — it’s kooky & mod all at the same time. To make to work on my face, Marie altered it a bit, because my eyes are much rounder than the example. I think it turned out pretty well. I look kind of like a bird!

Marie models ‘Cult Fave’.

The Cult Fave look is much more subtle than ‘Fafi’ but it’s still beautiful. Soft, light & totally wearable. Doesn’t Marie look gorgeous?

Okay, now. Drumroll please. Here’s what I received, as well as reviews & pictures. It’s been a messy, smudgy, sticky morning here in the iCiNG Bowl!

Glaze lipstick in Flash ‘N’ Dash
The first thing to know about the glaze lipsticks is that they are true to their name. The colour is not creamy or frosty or matte or any of those things — on the lips, it’s more like a highly-saturated gloss. So while Flash ‘N’ Dash looks wild in the tube, when you put it on your mouth it’s more of a flourish than a squawking statement. It has a very definite orange tint, which isn’t usually a colour I can wear, but this is subtle enough that it looks magnificent.

Glaze lipstick in Fun ‘N’ Sexy
My new favourite lipstick. While in the tube it seems like the kind of lipstick that would gouge the eye of any onlooker, it actually glides on slick & sheer. I guess that’s why it’s called a ‘glaze’ lipstick! It’s just like that. If you can imagine your lips as a dessert, this lipstick is the ultimate sugary enamel finish. Now, go out & be delicious!

Glaze lipstick in High Top
I can pretty much picture the sort of girl who would wear this colour all the time. She’d spend a lot of time sitting on the steps outside her apartment in New York, sucking on grape popsicles & scribbling down raps on a notepad. She’d call herself ‘MC Hi-Gloss’, wear big dangly earrings & be secretly in love with everyone. I think that’s all you need to know.

Glaze lipstick in Not So Innocent
This looks so pale in the tube, but once you slick it on, it exudes a totally different hue. It’s a very sheer, subtle nude colour, with tiny, shiny pearls in pink & peach. I am normally not into nude make-up (I have always been a little bit, ‘What’s the point?’), but this is so lovely it’s hard to resist. Eminently wearable, this is the sort of thing you want to put on when you want to wear lipstick but not look like you’re trying too hard.

Lustre lipstick in Strawbaby
Lustre lipstick is different to the glaze in that the colour is more saturated & stronger. Strawbaby is, by MAC’s definition, “coral rose with rainbow pearl”. I think that’s why I don’t like it — the mere mention of the word ‘coral’ gives me flashbacks to the 80’s. Screech! It’s not great with my skin tone, either; it just makes me look funny. I don’t think I’ll wear this much, but for those of you who love coral — well, you’re onto a winner!

Lipglass in Sugar Trance
MAC’s lipglasses are their take on a lip gloss. Super-high sheen, which is long-lasting & always a vibrant colour. One thing about their lipglass formulation is that it’s quite sticky. A lot of people don’t like this — it’s the sort of thing that your hair sticks to, crumbs cling to, & in Australia, it can easily make you feel like a strip of flypaper — so if you’re not a fan of the sticky mouthed thing, beware! Having said this, Sugar Trance is a superb soft pink with oodles of iridescence. I am a big fan.

Lipglass in Totally It
They got the name right with this one. This lipglass is RAUCOUS! The colour of the tube makes me think of a dazzling, intergalactic strawberry, but on the lips it’s quite different. It’s the perfect teenage pouty pink — berry-tastic & rich & a bit obnoxious. The colour your mouth would go if you lived on a steady diet of artificially red-coloured food (like popsicles & lollipops). Wear it next time you go rollerskating.

Lipglass in Squeeze It
Squeeze It looks plum in the tube, but on me it looked more like a deep red with a hint of bronze. It’s a darker colour than I’d usually wear but it’s quite a lovely shade with a bit of sparkle. I think I’m just too young for a colour this dark.

Lipglass in Cult Fave
Cult Fave is a deeper hue than Sugar Trance but quite similar. While Sugar Trance has a base of pink & peach, Cult Fave has notes of blue. Don’t let that put you off, though — blue-hued lipsticks or lip glosses make your teeth look super-white! — & this lipglass is totally kissable.

Paint pot in Layin’ Low
Layin’ Low is quite nude with a hint of pink. It’s not very dynamic on its own, but it would make a great base if you wanted to press some glitter or another colour over the top. I really like it — pair it with Not So Innocent for that “not made-up but totally made-up” look.

Paint pot in Perky
Creamy coral. Yes. There’s a lot of that in this collection! Perky goes on superbly (as do all the paint pots) but it just doesn’t grab me. Maybe because it’s too conservative.

Paint pot in Nice Vice
This is a dark purple with a hint of violet iridescence. While I like the colour in theory, I unfortunately find it extremely hard to wear without looking like a victim of a vicious street brawl. The good news is that you don’t have to use paint pots just as eye shadow — that is, all over your lid. A hint of this at the corners of your eyes or used along the lashes as a liner is often all you need.

Paint pot in Girl Friendly
Girl Friendly is a not-so-squeaky-clean pink. For those of you who like pink but don’t always want the saccharine overload that it tends to be, this is your paint pot! It’s quite a subtle colour that will suit a lot of people. I often use a MAC eye shadow called Nocturnelle (a shimmery berry colour) over my lids when I really want my eyes to pop, but this is going to be my new replacement. It’s not as dark but it is just as beautiful. Yummy.

Paint pot in Cash Flow
Bling bling! This is so Beyonce! I love that this is a paint pot, because I often find that gold eye shadow or powder doesn’t have a lot of staying power. This will stay for weeks! You’ll have to bribe it to leave! It will make a magnificent base for other colours you might want to layer up — how about parrot green or royal blue?

Paint pot in Rollickin’
Rollickin’ is the turquoise splashed all over my website, so of course I have a soft spot for it. It is gorgeous. It’s a superb, frosty turquoise with shimmery white pearl. It’s vibrant & gutsy & perfect for anyone wanting to experiment with the Cleopatra-esque make-up that McQueen sent out on the runway at the end of 2007. Oh, I love turquoise. What was it that Christian Dior said? Oh, yes…

“The tones of gray, pale turquoise and pink will prevail.” — Christian Dior

Marie was also really impressed by the paint pots. Here’s her review:

“Paint pots – at first I didn’t know how people would go with using them as I found them a little tricky to use but after “the test” I am now a convert. The Test – As you know yesterday was warm – 35 or so plus that warm wind didn’t help too cool me down. Got home mildly sweaty into a hot hot hot apartment. Our aircon isn’t amazing but with the heat and the fact that I baked cookies and cooked dinner I was reasonably moist. For any type of make-up I would forgive it if it slid off my face after all of that but not the paint pots! I actually rubbed my finger over my eye lids last night before taking off my make-up just to see the staying power. And baby it stays. No creases, smudges and the colour stayed true. I think paint pots would be great for anyone who has trouble with eye products creasing or just need some extra staying power while working it on the dance floor.”

Fafi Eyes 1
There are four colours in this superb eyeshadow compact. Vanilla, Hay, Pink Venus & Howzat. This palette is perfect for doing a smoky eye or just keeping it light. I used to use an old MAC eye shadow called Pink Freeze to dot the inner corners of my eyes — I do this because it makes them pop & look much brighter. But I think I have found new lovers in Vanilla & Hey. Vanilla is a creamy pale white, while Hey is a more moderate pale nude popped with white pearl. Gorgeous. Pink Venus was hard to photograph (so sorry!) but it is actually a super-soft & beautiful pale pink. Pink around the eyes sounds like you’re trying to do that heroin chic thing, but in reality, it looks really good. You should try it out, you might be surprised. & Howzat is a smoky grey with silver sparkles. Too much of it makes me look like someone socked me, but I know lots of die-hard goths (& neogoths, nudge nudge!) who will dust this stuff everywhere! I won’t, but I think it’ll make a great eyeliner!

Iridescent power in Belightful
Turns out, it is incredibly hard to get a good picture of iridescence (who would’ve thought, huh?). So you’ll just have to dream away with me! This powder is mind-blowingly fabulous. I am not much one for iridescent powers, or bronzer for that matter. It’s always seemed a bit “out there” for me, & I usually relish my pale look enough to skilfully avoid any bronzing powder, but Belightful is really fabulous. MAC call it a “gilded peach bronze” but to me it seems more like teeny flakes of gold shimmer. I am going to use it all the time.

Powder blush in Hipness
This is another one of the Fafi products that looks very different on to how it looks in the compact — or even in the description. They say “intense coral with soft white pearl”, & I say “light pink with a touch of shine”. Coral, it is not! But it’s fantastic, & is my new favourite blush.

Powder blush in Fashion Frenzy
This is a super-bright pink blush! I gave it to Marie, who will be able to wear it better than I ever could. It looks very pink in the compact & it is even more so on the skin. Especially on me, I am a pale wee thing! This would be a great blush for anyone with darker skin, though, who needs more saturation in their cheek colour.

Zoom lash mascara
I love all of MAC’s mascaras, & Zoom Lash is no exception. It’s dark, rich & magnificent. Perfect for those Bambi moments.

Fluidline in Blacktrack
Any of the Fluidline colours are my number one crush when it comes to eyeliner, & Blacktrack is the colour I use most often. (I even sang its praises in my Fashion Darling column. I just cannot go back to using a pencil these days — a little pot of Fluidline & a small angled brush are all you need!

Eye kohl in Smolder
While Fluidline is always my eyeliner of choice, MAC’s eye kohls are among the best in the business. Their fabulously rich texture makes them super-easy to apply & they just look more & more luscious as you layer them up. They’re easy to smudge, which is great if you’re wielding a brush with intent, though not so much if you’re pre-disposed to hayfever or absent-minded eye-rubbing! Just keep that in mind, okay?

Eye kohl in Fascinating
Fascinating is made with the usual MAC eye kohl formulation — thick, creamy, dreamy eyeliner. Except it’s white! If any of you wanted to try out that Erin Fetherston look of yore, Fascinating should be an essential part of your make-up bag. The hue is strong & vibrant — ideal for making eyes look bigger & more fanciful! Too lovely.

Brush 208
I actually already had one of these, & it’s what I use to do my cat’s eye make-up. It’s a sharp, fine angled brush which is brilliant for getting straight lines & making short work of long lines!

Brush 210
This is the brush Marie used to do my eye make-up in the ‘Fafi’ look. I haven’t actually used it myself yet, but she was over the moon with it. It is super-fine & very firm — so you can press quite hard while still drawing a thin line. Awesome for intricate detailed work.

Brush 182
This brush is gorgeous. Painfully so. Small & fat, it’s the perfect thing for applying blush, irridescent power or bronzer. The bristles grip colour well & a couple of sweeps are all you need for instant starlet cheekbones!

Nail lacquer in Girls Will Be Girls
This polish is a shimmering pink with peach iridescence. If a ballerina girl was granted a wish to have her own kingdom, this is the colour she would want everything to be — her castle, her horse & of course, her bed. Put on a couple of coats of this whenever you feel the need to retreat to your younger self.

Nail lacquer in Boom!
Boom! is the colour of an umeboshi plum. It’s a dark maroon with blue notes & a subtle sparkle. It’s the sort of colour that you might wear while you write your first screenplay, or when you perform live with your band in a dive bar. Underground & urban but sexy at the same time.

Fafi make-up bag
Well, it’s hard to write about a make-up bag! Suffice to say that the Fafi make-up bag I received is well-made & holds a lot of stuff. Not quite everything I was sent, but… almost!

There were also some things I didn’t receive. If you own any of these products, I’d love to hear what you think of them! Lustre lipstick in Utterly Frivolous, Fafi Eyes 2 & iridescent pressed power in Sassed-up & Verve-acious.

I’d like to say an enormous thank you to MAC Cosmetics for being so generous & also for making such continuously outstanding products. I have yet to buy a MAC product that doesn’t do what it says it will — & I don’t know if I can say as much for any other brand.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Fafi For MAC

[ 11 February 2008, 17:28 ]

Raquel Reed loves Fafi, too!

I just wanted to let you all know that the Fafi for MAC Cosmetics collection has been released in the United States. (YAY!) It won’t be available in the United Kingdom or Australia until the start of March, but anyone who wants to get in quick can now do so online! (There’s also free shipping within the U.S. if you use the code ‘MACFAFI’ at checkout.)

I LOVE this range so much. Not just the make-up, but the accessories too! After all, who could say no to a Fafi t-shirt with striped arms? Or a silk scarf printed with Fafi characters? I have been waiting for it for ages & it is not disappointing.

Here’s what I’m itching to get my hands on:
Lipstick in ‘High Top’ (I love ‘Fun ‘n’ Sexy’ but just don’t think I could wear it)
Lipglass in ‘Totally It’
Fafi Eyes 1
Powder Blush in ‘Fashion Frenzy’
Nail Lacquer in ‘Boom!’
Mini Clearly Fafi make-up bag
Fafi t-shirt
Fafi scarf
...& I wouldn’t find a Fafi ‘Ermine’ doll either.

Yum. What do you think of the collection? Très délicieux or not so much?

Love letters & feather headdresses,

What We're Using

[ 19 January 2008, 12:52 ]

I thought it would be interesting to do a periodical round-up on the beauty products we’re all using & how well they’re working for us. It’s a good way to trade information & find products you might like to test out yourself.

Here’s my current line-up:

FACE

Cleanser: Simple Purifying Cleansing Lotion
I bought a really interesting book at the Daylesford Book Barn (!) called Supermodel’s Beauty Secrets, which actually turned out to be quite a good read. The best part of the book, though, was where the author gave product suggestions. She named a few different products that she claimed were “model staples”, among them Vaseline Lip Therapy, Nivea Crème, Astral Moisturiser, The Body Shop Elderflower Eye Gel & Simple Cleansing Lotion. I have been so frustrated with my skincare routine lately, so I did some research (Make-Up Alley, I love you!) & decided to pick up the Simple cleanser. It’s really lovely & gentle & I feel like it gives me a thorough cleanse. I will definitely buy this again. My skin isn’t perfect right now, but I think that is mostly due to the fact that I am still detoxing — I can feel it.

Toner: 1/5 apple cider vinegar to 4/5 purified water
I made my own toner using apple cider vinegar & purified water. It sits in a little blue glass bottle & I just shake it up before I use it. Apple cider vinegar is great for treating individual spots (undiluted), but all over the face it’s very drying & a bit much. Mixed with water, it is a very effective toner & I’m pretty sure it’s contributing to my good skin at the moment!

Moisturiser: Nivea Crème
Nivea Crème is another one of the products recommended by Supermodel’s Beauty Secrets, & I like it. However, it’s very thick & heavy, almost too heavy for my skin. I use a miniscule amount on my face & I’m still finding I look quite shiny under my make-up. I like the brand though, so I might switch to Nivea Light.

Serums: Christian Dior Capture Essential serum (face & eyes)
Yet another product recommended by the book! Okay, I love these serums a LOT. I use them morning & night, after toning but before moisturising. They make my skin look so good that I feel like I could skip foundation & still look great. That is pretty much the highest praise I’m ever going to give a skin product! They have quite a strong smell but it’s really not a big deal. They were expensive, too, but I find that the pump dispenser gives the exact right amount, so you never feel like you’re wasting any, which is a bonus.

...I have heard amazing things about the Babor cleansing system, but if this current routine keeps working for me, I’m not going to change! Of course, it’s hard to know whether my skin looks great because of the products I’m using, or whether it is mostly due to the fact that I am eating raw, but I think it’s probably a combination of factors.

HAIR

Shampoo: Healthy Hair Sexy Hair Chocolate Soy Milk Shampoo
I bought this because the girl in the haircare shop told me that she used it on her coloured hair & that it worked wonders. I should have read the reviews on Make-up Alley before I plonked down $30! First of all, this shampoo smells divine. It’s so good that I always take a deep inhalation of it before using it. Unfortunately, it also makes my hair quite fluffy, which is really disappointing. I like my hair sleek & flat unless I tell it otherwise. So, while the smell is fantastic, the fluffiness factor is totally bunk. I will be buying something else next time…

Hair treatment: KMS Colorvitality Color Protect Spray
My old hairdressers recommended this for protecting my colour. I just spray it in when I get out of the shower — it helps to lock in the colour & de-tangle my hair. Well, this stuff is incredible! I will definitely be buying it again, it has done wonders for the vitality of my hair colour! Brilliant!

OTHER

Nails: Dr Lewinn’s Revitanail
I have heard great things about this product, so I finally bit the bullet & bought some. It contains formaldehyde — eep — so they don’t recommend you use it forever, just in short bursts. You basically reapply it every day for five days & then take it off, give your nails a rest for a bit & go through the process again. While this is slightly tedious, I have seen an enormous improvement in the strength of my nails, & they are also longer than I’ve ever seen them. YAY!

So, what products are you using on your face, hair, body? What do you think of them? What’s your holy grail — the products you keep returning to? Tell us your secrets!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Hair Extensions

[ 18 January 2008, 18:02 ]

Note: I am in the incredibly fortunate position of having Wildilocks as a sponsor, & do not pay directly for services received. Please read my disclaimer for more information!

I have always been the girl with short hair. Since I was about ten years old, it has never been longer than my shoulders. I had a bob for years, standard young gawth fare — blunt & blue-black with a ruler-straight fringe. As I got a bit older, I started to experiment with it more: I shaved back my hairline, bleached the hell out of it, coloured it blue green purple red pink white, shaved one side of my head, teased it into beehives, backcombed it into neon-coloured quiffs & hid it under scarves & hats when it was being intolerable. But it never grew longer than my shoulders. I was always too fickle, forever wanting a change — I never had the time (or patience) to grow it out.

Recently though, I’ve been lusting for long hair. I love the look of long hair under a headscarf or turban, & I often find that if my hair isn’t doing it for me & I’m wearing glasses, hiding my hair under a scarf just makes me look like I’m terminally ill. The idea of extensions had crossed my mind, but as far as I knew, most places that did extensions only stocked them in wavy curly blonde. I also thought that synthetic hair would start to look cheap really quickly, & I didn’t want that kind of nightmare on my hands.

My friend Joel stayed with me recently & while he was in town, he introduced me to a friend of his, a woman called Cass. Cass owns Wildilocks, a hairdressing company with salons in Perth (Base808) & Melbourne (The LockWorks). We visited her at her shop & I looked around excitedly. First of all — the front counter was stocked with every colour of Special Effects hair dye (my favourite brand EVER)! They had New Rock boots stacked in a corner! The girls behind the desk were busy spinning colourful hair into dreadlocks, & Peaches was playing on the stereo. I felt as if I had arrived. I felt as if I could practically taste the possibilities!

A couple of weeks later, I went in to see Cass & have a consultation. I had decided that I wanted long hair, for once & for all, & I wondered what they could do for me. While I did initially want a full head of hair, because the back of my hair was so short, Cass told me that if I got a full head done, I would have to comb down my hair all the time so that where the extensions were attached wouldn’t show. I’m not actually very high maintenance, & I decided I couldn’t be bothered doing that, so she suggested that we extend the front, sides & the two long pieces at the back & go from there. I said yes please & she booked me in.

I arrived at Wildilocks at 1pm, bearing my chocolate vegan cupcakes with lavender icing. It’s my patented ultra-smooth move, haha — & they were very well-received! I was shown to a chair & introduced to Kat, a woman with amazing multicoloured wool dreads. We talked about what we were going to do. I hadn’t thought about it before I arrived, but I had quite a lot of regrowth, so we decided that we should deal with that. I told her that normally, because my hair is so dark, it requires two applications of bleach & a toner to get it down to a point where it can be coloured. Usually one application of bleach leaves my hair horrendously orange. Anyway, Kat applied the bleach & didn’t use tinfoil like people normally do, instead she used little plastic insulating papers. They kept my head very toasty, much more effective than tinfoil! She also mixed a treatment into the bleach to stop it from hurting my scalp — & I didn’t feel a thing. After a while, she came over to check my progress. She rinsed off my hair — & gave me the most incredible scalp massage of my life — & when I looked in the mirror, my roots were SUPER blonde. Wow, wow, wow. Wow! I have never had bleach work that well & not even hurt me at all!

After they dried me off, they applied the Special Effects. We used some Wildflower, some Blue Velvet & a little bit of Fishbowl — Cass said that Fishbowl helps the blue fade to a better colour. As I sat there, soaking up the dye, Kat & Nicole got to working dyeing my extensions. The extensions are human hair, so they hold colour in exactly the same way as my hair, & when the colour starts to fade (which will take ages, but will happen eventually), it will all change at the same pace. 45 minutes later they rinsed me off, gave me another incredible scalp massage, dried my hair & started to attach my extensions.

Cass has a really amazing system of attaching extensions, the likes of which I’ve never seen before (or even heard of). She used a bead to attach the extension to my hair, then used pliers to flatten it so that the extension stayed put. Very cool! Cass started on the back of my head & moved around to one side, & enlisted Kat & Nicole to help out on the other side. I was surprised at how quickly they got it done — I’m pretty sure it took less than an hour. As my locks started to appear, I felt like Lady Godiva with hand-maidens working at her side. I kept eyeballing myself in the mirror, trying not to grin ear to ear the entire time! I did exclaim & squeal a lot though. Kat said, “I have the coolest job ever”, & if everyone responds like I do, I believe her!

Eventually I had enough hair, but it was very long, & so we decided to trim it off a bit. Nicole cut it in a very steep a-line, quite short at the back graduating to a lot of length at the front. I wriggled excitedly in my chair & eyeballed myself a whole lot more. Cass gave me a sheet of instructions for looking after my hair (put it in loose braids to sleep, how to wash it, etc.) & I swooshed off into the evening! I stared at myself in practically every window on the street, & when I got home my boyfriend’s mouth dropped open.

I slept with braids in last night & today the thrill of it all is still huge. I absolutely love them, they look fantastic, they are versatile & great quality & I’m totally over the moon.

Best of all — Wildilocks is offering a 15% discount off all services at The LockWorks to any iCiNG reader until the 8th of February! You just have to mention that you read my site. A little gift from me to you. Mwah!

Thank you SO much, Wildilocks! As long as I am in Melbourne, I will never stray! I pledge my undy(e)ing devotion!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Daylesford

[ 9 January 2008, 13:25 ]

As many of you are aware, over the Christmas period, my boyfriend & I fled Melbourne in search of Australia’s spa capital — & relaxation holy grail — Daylesford, Victoria. Daylesford is a tiny little town, set at the base of an enormous mountain range. It is most well-known for the mineral springs that surround the area, & the mineral water that is used in the multitude of spa treatments available there.

Cherry Tree Cottage
I decided that we should do something more exciting than staying in a huge hotel while we were in town, & started searching online for an interesting-looking b&b. I was a little bit concerned that we might end up in a place that seemed like it belonged to someone else’s grandmother, so I had a good poke around. I was sold as soon as I saw Cherry Tree Cottage’s slogan, proclaiming that the cottage was a “doily-free zone”. I thought it was totally hilarious, so after looking at the pictures & showing them to my boyfriend, I called David (the owner) to book in to the Garden Spa Apartment.

One of the first things you should know is that David is awesome. He made me an egg sandwich on Christmas day because I was hungry — what a champion! He has a great personality, he’s an artist & a bit of a kook, & he does a fabulous breakfast. We were presented with a sheet of paper every day to fill out, with options like egg, bacon, avocado, sausage, mushrooms, tomato etc., which we ate in bed. No skimping here! The weather was quite cold while we were in Daylesford, but on the last day it warmed up, so we had breakfast outside at a little table & chairs — very civilised.

The apartment we stayed in was behind the main house, but it was enormous, with a bedroom, kitchen, living area & generous bathroom. The kitchen was well-equipped, with a microwave & a fridge, & there was complimentary champagne & a cheese platter waiting for us when we arrived. The spa bath was absolutely incredible, with fantastic jets & (more than enough) room for two. We spent a lot of time sitting there, water bubbling away, making plans for 2008. Spending time at Cherry Tree Cottage was the best ever way to see out 2007, & make way for 2008. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

Old Hepburn Hotel
An Irishman at the visitor’s information centre recommended that we pay a visit to the Old Hepburn Hotel. He said they did amazing pub food, & on our first day there, that was exactly what I was in the mood for. After driving up & down the road & eventually going back to the information centre, we found it. It was a Real Country Pub. Intense. Anyway, the food was mind-blowing. I had the most amazing Chicken Kiev I’ve eaten in my entire life. The plate awash with garlic butter, & a huge, juicy piece of chicken, generously crumbed, sat in the middle. So good. Not necessarily very healthy, but SO GOOD.

Salus
Salus, the spa attached to The Lake House, was the first one we visited. I was very impressed with the whole thing. We arrived & were given robes & slippers to change into, before being led down an outdoor pathway to our tree-top mineral spa — pictured above. We walked into a little wooden cabin with a tub near the window. We were given a choice of oils (lavender or rose — we picked lavender), the woman fired up the spa & left us to it. We had booked in for half an hour, with my next treatment following soon after, but as there was a bit of a wait until my boyfriend’s facial, she said he was welcome to stay in the tub until his therapist was ready. Very cool. The spa was lovely: the smell of cedar, shutters that we could open or close as we pleased (without getting out of the tub), the cool fresh air outside, a beautiful view out over the trees.

Simon had an Urban Cleanse facial, while I had a Relaxation Massage in another room. My massage therapist was fantastic, very talented & I felt incredible by the time it was over. I asked him to mostly concentrate his efforts on my back & shoulders, which he did, & I was really happy with everything he did. I don’t think it could have been improved. Simon doesn’t remember much about his facial (any more!), but I know that when he came out of the room, he was totally blissed out & dazed. Salus did everything right. The facilities were clean & modern, the staff were very friendly, personable & skilled, & we left feeling really good about ourselves.

The Lake House
We had Christmas dinner at The Lake House, & were incredibly impressed. The Lake House has won squillions of awards, so we were expecting something pretty impressive, & they really delivered. We had…

Soup: Cucumber vichyssoise, smoked trout custard, house cured salmon, crème fraîche.
Entree: Pressed duck terrine & morello cherry sauce.
Main: Roast breast of free-roaming turkey, wild rice, cranberry & pine nut pilaf, miniature turkey pie, sweet potato.
Dessert: Nougat parfait, berry sorbet & local berries.
As well as miniature plum pudding, mince pies, chocolates & Christmas cake to take home.

The service was efficient & crisp, the food was fabulous, & it was worth the $120/head price-tag. We were also given Christmas crackers!

Mineral Spa
Mineral Spa is adjoined to the infamous Peppers Springs Retreat, a huge old hotel which has been tarted up & given a shiny new visage. It is an imposing piece of architecture, surrounded by sculpted hedges & a gravel driveway. We walked in the front, were issued with robes, slippers & a locker key, then sent off to get changed. The receptionists were very “business-like”, & not particularly welcoming. We then reconvened in this strange waiting room area, which had tiny teacups & a lot of books on the soul etc. We waited in this area for at least half an hour before one of us was called off to begin our treatment. (Not cool — we were there on time.)

I had a Mineral Spa Signature Li’Tya Ritual. At two hours (& at a cost of $240), I expected it to be pretty damn marvellous. This was reinforced by the amazing woman I spoke to on the telephone, who outlined what I’d be getting for my money (I never met her in person, unfortunately). The signature ritual involved “a gentle nourishing facial incorporating our unique pressure point face clay mask, a full body mud wrap, hair & scalp hydrating mask, soft pak float bed, hydrotherapy massage bath, & finish with a complete head to toe sustenance for the skin”. What I got was less impressive.

I walked into the room & was told to sit down & put my feet in a bowl of warm water. My therapist offered me three jars to sniff, & told me to choose which one appealed to me most. As it turned out, I chose the “rejuvenating” oil, which was used in my foot bath & also in my mud wrap. Now, here’s where it gets interesting. The rejuvenating oil was called “pepperberry”, & contained menthol. She said that sometimes, the menthol in the mud was quite cold, so I should be ready for that. I lay down on a bed which was heated underneath, & she started to apply the mud to my body. She put it on quite quickly, then wrapped me in a sheet & pulled up the flaps from the side of the bed, which were filled with warm water. This was quite comforting, kind of like wearing a big hot water bottle, but soon the menthol kicked in & I was freezing. I am one of those people who really feels the cold & oh baby, did I ever feel the cold! She applied a mask to my hair & scalp & gave me a little head massage, which was nice but I couldn’t concentrate on it because I was so cold. It was not relaxing in the slightest. I started to shiver & shake & just when I thought I couldn’t take it any more, she hit a button & I started to sink.

I didn’t know it when I first walked in, but the “bed” I was lying on was actually a waterbed. Somehow, the hard surface which was initially supporting me started to dissipate, & I was lying in a big, warm bed — except I wasn’t getting wet. It was great. I was so warm, I was really happy. She told me she was going to leave me for a bit, so she walked out & I lay there, enjoying the warmth, wriggling about a bit like a mermaid (remembering, of course, that I was stuck to a sheet with a whole lot of mud so I couldn’t move much). When she came back, I was feeling really good, & she told me to clamber out & come through to the next room where there was a hydrotherapy bath awaiting me.

I climbed in but it wasn’t very warm (I was still covered in menthol mud, brrr!), so I asked her if I could have more warm water. Somehow, the taps didn’t work, so she ran off & came back with a jug of hot water, which she poured in. This did the trick. Then she left me to it. The bath was incredible. It had handles on the side & a bar for your feet to go under, as well as a display screen which indicated which parts of the body the jets were working on. The bath went through its routine — jets on the back, jets down the legs, jets on the shoulders, & about a million other combinations. It was great & totally weird & I was loving it. When it finished, about half an hour later, there was a big lovely ring of mud all the way around the bath, & I was squeaky clean & soft.

I went back into the original room & my therapist covered me in oil & massaged me. It was a very, very good massage. This was definitely her forte. Yum. Then she gave me a facial, & I think she hit the button which immersed me, again, & that was the end. I ran to the locker room looking like a troll doll — hair sticking up in the air — rinsed out my hair mask, & got dressed.

It was a strange experience, almost a case of the technology being too advanced for the people, or the technology making the people look amateur. The bath was great but if you don’t know how to make it warmer, then that’s a problem. The woman who took me for my treatment was very kind, but didn’t seem to know what she was doing — I actually had to prompt her to do the hair & scalp hydrating mask, for example. The facial was disappointing, too — it involved her putting some kind of cream on my face & touching about three pressure points once each. Perhaps the problem was that I was expecting one person to be great at all the things involved in the spa ritual, but that’s what you pay for, right? If you’re thinking of going here, I definitely recommend anything that involves the soft pak float bed or their hydrotherapy baths — when it comes to the rest of it, your mileage may vary.

Simon had a Li’Tya Kodo Massage for 90 minutes. He was very impressed by it, & thinks his massage therapist was amazing. Apparently, it was very much like a regular massage, but there was additional limb stretching, a little bit of reflexology & some pressure point work on the hands. Simon uses massage etc. to help him work through emotions & spiritual issues, & he felt that the massage he had was very beneficial in helping him sort through a lot of stuff. Highly recommended!

Also: Simon went to see Ann Holden for a crystal healing, which he said was fantastic. We paid a visit to Lavendula Swiss-Italian Lavender Farm, which was beautiful — unfortunately the proliferation of flies made it impossible to eat our lavender scones. I did buy lavender oil to use in cupcake baking, though! I found a tarot reader on the main street who also practised EFT (exciting!) but she was away so I didn’t manage to see her. We had brilliant fish & chips at the Daylesford Seafood Bar — the best I’ve had in Australia, in fact. People rave about Avant Garden secondhand bookshop, but I didn’t see a single thing I wanted, & MAD magazines were $20 each! Yow! I had much better luck at the Daylesford Book Barn, beside the lake, where I spent $100 & scored an enormous stack of brilliant books.

Summary
Daylesford is an excellent town to spend some time in. Don’t expect to rage it up — this is the kind of place where you roll out of bed, get pampered, then roll back into bed early. Our cellphones had no reception whatsoever, & there wasn’t a chance in hell of finding a wireless connection (I took my Macbook), which at first was kind of irritating, but it turned out to be a good thing. We were only away for about four days, but it seriously felt like we had been gone for a month. It was remarkable, & exactly what we needed. If I did it again, I’d either stay at Cherry Tree Cottage or The Lake House, I’d skip the Mineral Spa at Peppers Springs, & I’d pay a visit to Acqua Viva, which I hear is very good.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

A Model Search

[ 12 December 2007, 00:03 ]

On Saturday morning, I woke up at 6.30am to offer my services as an extremely amateur make-up artist at a modelling competition. Earlier that week, my teacher had asked me & a couple of other girls in my class to help her do faces at a show, & I was delighted (& totally flattered) to accept. My friend & fellow make-up artistry student Anna & I met up on a street corner, bleary-eyed & nervous, & were escorted to Chadstone by Audrey. What a champ!

Fuelled by V energy drink & Freddo chocolate frogs (cornerstones of any fine breakfast!), we arrived at Chadstone & descended on the management boardroom. Our make-up teacher was already there, looking fabulous, as always. She gave us all a photocopy of the looks we were supposed to do & outlined how to do it. Then the models were sent in, & we started to work!

Caroline, my make-up teacher, on the left.

I have to admit that I had some preconceptions about what the models might be like. I thought it was very possible that they would all be super-tall, super-thin, & maybe a bit snotty. I thought they might speak in single syllables or be rude or just refuse to talk at all. Thankfully, I was completely wrong! The models I made up couldn’t have been sweeter. They were all young (ranging from 14 to 19 years old), really lovely & quite nervous.

Hard at work… or hardly working?

The first girl I worked on recognised me from Cosmopolitan & told me excitedly how much she loved my column. (Awww!) When I asked her about the competition, she said that she didn’t really care about the modelling contract (the major prize up for grabs), but was really excited about the possibility of winning shopping vouchers… !

All of the models I spoke to had never done anything like this before & really didn’t know what to expect. One boy I made up had never worn make-up before, & it was so cute to hear his observations as I moved the brush over his face. “Oh wow, that’s really relaxing, like a little massage!”, he said. He was adorable.

Anna does a face.

When Audrey got bored of being the official paparazzo, he offered his services as a manicurist…

How sweet!

At one o’clock, Audrey, Anna & I scooted over to where the competition was being held. A girl with a huge, awesome afro was the MC & after a bit of the usual “thanks to our sponsors” chat, the models started to come out. They were in groups of three & they had to walk to the end of the runway, look at the judges, pose & walk back. It was interesting to see the variety of confidence & skill. Most of the girls seemed really into it, even the ones who couldn’t walk in the heels they’d been given, but the boys were not as happy to be there! Their walking styles ranged from slightly simian to really robotic to extremely elephantine.

I do my little turn on the catwalk…

I watched the people I’d worked on with the most interest. I really wanted them to win! (In the picture above, I did the make-up on the boy walking & the girl in the yellow shoes.) At one point all the girls were asked to line up for a photo, & I was thrilled to see the two girls I’d made up posing like professionals (hands on hips, elbows pointed back)! They were working it “like the rent was due tonight”, as Jay Alexander says.

The stage cleared so the judges could deliberate. After five minutes of bad DJ’ing, one of the judges came back on stage to announce the winners — one boy & one girl. Imagine my pure delight to see that the winning girl was one whose make-up I’d done!

She is victorious!

I was so happy for her! She was such a sweetie, & when she won, the crowd went crazy! The winners each received a 24-month contract with Cameron’s modelling agency, a pair of jeans & about $3000 worth of shopping vouchers. The stuff dreams are made of.

It was a totally unique experience, & I’m so glad I agreed to do it. It’s really satisfying & cool to see the “fruits of your labour”, as it were, walking down a runway. I felt like a proud mother! It was a long day but absolutely worth it.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Eye Make-Up Questions!

[ 9 December 2007, 15:20 ]

I recently received this email…

“Currently, I use a black pencil eyeliner on my bottom lash, and use mascara. I’d like to create a smoky effect but I don’t want to buy heaps. Is there some sort of special brush I can use to smudge it in?

Ever since going to my friend’s house and we had a makeover, my friend did my make-up and she made me look like a clown. Ever since I’ve been worried about trying new make-up but I guess I should move on, because I like to try new things. I have blue eyes, and colours like green eye shadow are meant to suit me. I’ve tried green but it looks awful. I’d like to wear eye shadow because I’d like to buy all the colours and experiment in the mornings. I’d like to try pink, but do you think it would look wrong?

Also, I’ve read in some fashion magazines about glittery eyeliners. I went into Boots today and saw a very nice glittery pink eyeliner. But surely just wearing that, it won’t be noticeable? Is there anything you’re meant to wear with it as well?”

When I do a smoky eye, I use a teeny little brush to blend my kohl eyeliner pencil. I can’t find my brush online, but I think it’s worth your time to get your hands on the MAC Cosmetics 211 Fine Point Pencil Brush. It should do the trick. Just smudge smudge smudge. Also, when I do a smoky eye, I usually use a dark brown instead of black. (I like Teddy by MAC.) It’s not as harsh as black & I think it’s actually better at bringing out the subtle tones in blue or green eyes.

I have blue eyes too, as you may have noticed, & I use green eye shadow quite regularly. The one thing you need to be aware is that not all greens will suit you — just as not all purples, pinks, reds or blues will suit you. I can wear some shades of yellow, for example, but mustard yellow is a major no-no. If you have no idea what colours suit you, read Fashion Help For Recovering Goths. Then get your booty to a make-up counter where a trained professional can help you. Tell someone that you’d like to be able to wear green, but you’re not sure which shades suit you. They will show you an array of colours & help you find one that works with your eyes.

I regularly use eye shadows in various shades of pink. Again, it’s all about knowing which tones work with your skin & your eyes. I love deep pink as well as raspberry, but frosted baby pink makes me look like I’m Dynasty. Go to a make-up counter, have a play, ask some questions.

It’s hard to say what the glittery pink eyeliner will look like on you without seeing it. Is it a liquid, a pencil, a loose dust? Some glittery pink eyeliner is fine & light, whereas some is thick & vibrant. The way it looks will also depend on whether you are from Sudan or Sweden! I advise trying it on your skin before you buy it. If you’re applying something with a powder base to your face, a bit of water can help bind it to the skin, whereas if you’re using a kohl eyeliner, using some concealer & a neutral base eye shadow underneath will allow the eyeliner to make much more impact.

If you want to learn about make-up, my best advice is this:

Buy a set of brushes. MAC Cosmetics do starter sets of them every Christmas, & they are absolutely worth the money.
Make friends with the girls at your favourite make-up counter.
Ask questions.
Read about it. Kevyn Aucoin’s books (Face Forward & Making Faces) are like bibles — worship them!
Take a short make-up course if you can, or attend the classes held by make-up companies.
Play, play, play.

Really, you are going to learn the most from standing in the front of the mirror & making mistakes. Don’t be afraid to try new things — even the most theoretically incorrect technique can yield great results, & of course, wearing anything with a bit of confidence & sass goes a long way.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Spray Tanning Put To The Test!

[ 11 October 2007, 14:19 ]

Well, yesterday was one of the most unusual experiences of my life. Yes, I deigned to have a spray tan. There was a voucher in an issue of Cosmopolitan magazine offering up a “free spray tan”, which of COURSE I couldn’t resist.

I booked my appointment the day before & the receptionist told me to exfoliate well in the morning, not apply any body lotions, & to come along wearing loose clothing & “thongs”. I sauntered down there at 10.30am & a nice woman led me up three flights of stairs & took me into a little room with a huge black & glass box in the middle.

She explained what we were going to do. She told me to wear a showercap but to leave my hairline & ears showing. She told me to apply the “prep gel” to all parts of my body where I wanted the tan to take, but not to worry about doing my back. She then said I should apply a barrier cream to my fingernails & cuticles, palms & sides of fingers, inside forearms, toenails, heels & soles of my feet. She said she would go downstairs & program the machine, & that it would send out a test spray & start talking. She said that it always scared the hell out of her at first, so to be ready for it!

She asked me which shade I would like. There were three options — light, medium, or dark. I showed her my arm & said, “I’m quite pale, so I don’t want to look like one of those scary girls from the Gold Coast.” (No offence, super-tanned people, but I kind of like my ghostly pallor!) She told me that the ‘light’ application wouldn’t show up much, & suggested I go for medium. I thought, ‘Ahh, what the hell, it’ll wash off in a week anyway’. She told me to use the little telephone in the room if I needed any help & said she hoped I enjoyed my tan. She walked out & closed the door.

It was while I was standing, butt-naked, rubbing weird shimmery green gel into my skin & contemplating this MagicTan booth that I realised — the future is here. Seriously, it is. After all my prepping — & I forgot to put barrier cream on the soles of my feet, damn! — I walked into a glass booth, pressed a button, & it started speaking to me, telling me to change positions & spurting out all this crazy sugar-mist. It was surreal, to say the very least.

I held my breath & kept my eyes closed & tried to remember all the positions. There was facing away from the jets with your hands “like you’re holding buckets of water”. There was turned to the side with one leg bent & one arm up. Then the same, in reverse. Then facing toward the jets. I accidentally breathed in some of the spray stuff, which didn’t smell very good, & idly wondered whether I would have an asthma attack. When it was over — which was quite soon after I had stepped in, it didn’t take very long — I cracked my eyes open a tad & tried to find the door handle. I thought my contact lenses were covered in mist, but no, it was just that the mist was EVERYWHERE. I was so glad I had put my clothes on the other side of the room!

It took a while for the mist to dissipate & in the meantime, I was busy bedaubing my skin with a towel to get rid of the excess. Some of the tan was just sitting on me in weird globs. I used a wet towelette to clean my hands & toenails. Then I gingerly pulled my clothing on & strolled back downstairs.

I gave the woman my voucher & told her it was one of the strangest experiences of my life. She smiled at me & said the tan would last about a week “if you take good care of it”. Their definition of “taking care of it” is not exfoliating, moisturising a lot & not spending much time in the shower. Hmmm. A week isn’t much bang for your buck — I think the tans are usually about $55, so that averages out to about $8 a day. But then, I guess if you’re only doing it over summer (& that would be the case for most people, I would have thought), it’s a pretty good option.

I’ve since had a couple of showers & less of it came off than I was expecting, which was a pleasant surprise. My mother said that when she had a spray tan, after she showered it looked quite patchy — but mine is still pretty solid. I’m covered in cocoa butter from head to toe (okay, technically neck to toe) & I smell like Willy Wonka’s dream woman. I am also really brown, surprise surprise!

Overall, I would give the experience 4 out of 5 cupcakes. A point off for how long it (allegedly) lasts, & for breathing the stuff in. Blech! But it is definitely a great alternative to lying on the beach covered in oil — ew! — or going to a solarium, which, let’s face it, is basically like saying to someone, “Hey! Here’s $100, give me cancer, & make it snappy!”

Now I have to adjust to my new colouring. It’s pretty strange! I was very glad to see that my foundation is still the right colour. Phew!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Fashion Darling #003

[ 1 October 2007, 13:03 ]

Whee! Thank you Cosmopolitan! View the large version here. I wasn’t kidding when I said information on how to do the perfect cat’s eye was on the way!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

The Power Of Eyebrows

[ 28 September 2007, 16:06 ]

Yesterday was pretty exciting, as days go! In addition to hot air ballooning in the morning & getting my ears pierced (!!!), I also had my eyebrows professionally shaped.

I haven’t had my eyebrows done by anyone else since the first time I had them tweezed, which was when I was about 15. That’s a long time ago now! I’d been thinking about the power of eyebrows for a while — I am keen on a strong brow & wondered what a professional could do to my face.

I had heard really great things about Afnaan from the Vogue forums, so I emailed her & booked an appointment. Then there were two weeks of torment as I let my eyebrows grow out. The temptation to pluck was overwhelming, but somehow I managed to hold back!

You can only imagine how happy I was to be running across the road to Arch Enemy, Afnaan’s business! I sat in the chair & she started explaining what she was going to do, & how. She made astute observations, like, “One of your eyebrows is a little higher than the other” — which I had never even noticed! Eep! Then we embarked on the eyebrow grooming. She tinted my brows, waxed them & finally tweezed them. I sat in the chair from 1:45 to 3:00 & when she finished, I was THRILLED.

The shape is actually quite different to how I normally do my brows — I tend to make my arch quite severe, while the way Afnaan has done it means the shape is softer & it has really changed how my face looks.

One of my very first articles, The New Eyebrow, is all about how important eyebrows are to your face. They grow in all sorts of unusual ways, & can completely alter your appearance — for better or for worse! Having them shaped or tended to is definitely worth investigating, I promise you will be astounded at the difference. We all spend so much money on cleanser & moisturiser & makeup, but the number of women (& men especially) who don’t give their eyebrows a second thought is mind-boggling!

This morning I received an email from an iCiNG reader who had seen Afnaan’s details on Gala’s Guide To Melbourne, & also booked an appointment…

“I am totally in love with her and want to have her babies – my eyebrows have never looked this amazing (I have really unruly strawberry blonde brows) now they are slightly darker, and look like MODEL eyebrows. HOT!”

Do you need any further convincing? I didn’t think so. Run, don’t walk, to your nearest eyebrow specialist, & enjoy!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Gala's Top 5 Beauty Tips

[ 11 September 2007, 12:45 ]

I am always fascinated when I hear other people’s secret beauty tips, & I thought you might be in the same boat! So, here are some of my beauty tricks, & I’d love it if you spilled the beans on what keeps you looking (& feeling) amazing too!

Olive oil & sugar
I like to combine these & use it as a face scrub. I just mix them together in a little saucer & then rub it onto my face. The sugar helps slough dead skin cells (you can use salt but it’s a bit rough) & the olive oil is beautifully moisturising. It’s an especially great treatment for rejuvenating your sad winter skin! You can use it as a lip scrub too, it’s very effective.

Baby wipes
I always use these to remove my eye makeup. They are about a tenth of the price of ‘cosmetic’ makeup removal wipes, & do a better job. (I find that they usually sting or dry my face out.) Go for the type with vitamin e & aloe vera, they are fantastic! It’s so much easier to use one of those to remove your makeup at the end of a long night than going through your cleanser routine! Baby wipes + moisturiser will do the trick just fine.

Talcum powder
Use it in your hair on days when you’re feeling a bit greasy or lank. It adds volume & absorbs excess oil! I pour it into my hands & then dust it all over. I always emerge from a bit of a cloud but it is brilliant. I use Lush’s Candy Fluff which smells like… you guessed it… candy. (It also has sparkles in it, which suits me down to the ground.) But remember to dust your hair BEFORE you get dressed!

Primer
ALWAYS use a primer under your makeup! It smooths your skin, meaning your makeup glides on flawlessly & will look magnificent. MAC Cosmetics makes an SPF primer but it’s not available in Australia — how silly is that? We have no ozone layer! — so I buy mine on Ebay. I love not having to apply sunscreen over or under my makeup.

Apple cider vinegar
This is my best tip. I keep a big bottle of this in my medicine cabinet & drink a tablespoon a day (when I remember!). It is an amazing natural remedy for clearing your body of toxins & this really shows up in your skin. You can also apply it topically by pouring it onto a little cotton pad & patting it on any spots etc. It makes you smell kind of like a salad but it is really an incredible fix! (More info here & here!)

Okay, now it’s your turn!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

O Magazine & Ellen Barkin

[ 15 August 2007, 11:32 ]

I recently bought a copy of O magazine‘s July issue, because my girl Violet Blue had written a piece about porn for women & I was delighted for her!

While normally it’s not a magazine I would even flick through, I was pleasantly surprised by the content within. It was juicy, it had substance. It didn’t talk down to its readership & I felt like my $10.95 AU had been well-spent.

Well, I felt that way until I turned to page 206 & started reading a piece on Ellen Barkin, an actress who recently appeared in Ocean’s Thirteen. The article starts with an explanation of how she dislikes looking at herself in the mirror while she refers to herself as an “old lady”. We then hear about her beauty routine & how she’d like to gain seven pounds.

Finally, we reach this.

To say I was disappointed by this list is the understatement of the century. Some of this is a little hard to swallow.

“Don’t wear hats, except to keep the sun off your face. A hat makes you look as if you’re trying to get noticed.”

What exactly is she trying to say here? That women over 50 should cover up & shuffle down the street as if invisible? That once you hit your 50th birthday, your time in the spotlight is over? Time to eat at the early-bird special, grab your Zimmer frame & don orthopaedic shoes?

There are plenty of super-sexy, strong, wonderful role models who are over the age of 50. Like, for example, Helen Mirren, Catherine Deneuve, Sophia Loren, Susan Sarandon, Diane Keaton, Meryl Streep & Goldie Hawn... & hell, even Madonna (my new role model) will be 50 in a year’s time! Plenty of them have hair longer than their collarbone, wear red lipstick & (heaven forbid!) show off their knees!

I know that writing is easier when it’s prescriptive, & I know that a lot of people just want to be told what to do, but it doesn’t make for very positive, inclusive reading, nor does it empower anyone particularly.

I expected something a little more age positive from O magazine. Here’s my take on the assignment.

Gala’s 10 Rules For Everyone

1. Accept yourself. Now. As you are. In all your wonderful imperfection, with all your delicious flaws, regardless of past failure or pain. Stop delaying approval of yourself. You will not be a better (or worse) person when you’ve made your first million, or when you have legions of screaming fans, or when you have a baby. Love yourself now. Forgive yourself now.

2. Take care of yourself — whatever that means to you. From buying a pet to going for long walks with your best friends; from getting a weekly manicure to leaving your abusive partner. You deserve it — & you deserve to feel good.

3. Assert your sexuality. You don’t just choose an orientation & that’s the end of it. Things change! Go with your whims! Buy toys, read manuals, learn tantra, do whatever you want to do. It will keep you youthful, as well as making life more fun.

4. Put the same effort into developing your personal style as most other people put into following trends. In a few years time, when you have a wardrobe full of incredible coats, beautiful shoes & mind-boggling jewellery — & everyone else only has “basics” & recent trends to work from — you will thank me!

5. Develop a strong enough sense of self that you are truly living your own life. Have faith in yourself, believe in yourself, even when your spouse/parents/friends are telling you to go in the opposite direction. At the same time, stay fluid, stay open, or you’ll stagnate. Keep pushing, keep questioning. We stop growing as people when we stop asking questions.

6. Be good to people. Take the moral high-ground. Resist the urge to “get revenge”. Avoid gossip. “Treat people as if they were what they ought to be, & you help them to become what they are capable of becoming.” (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe.)

7. Take risks. Change your hairstyle, date someone younger, buy a fabulous sports car, move to Paris, open a bakery, make new friends! Take responsibility for your life, your circumstances, your choices. It is not anyone else’s fault.

8. Shirk that boring obligation to wear ‘appropriate’ clothing. Everyone looks better when they feel good in what they have on their back. Wear a ballgown to the supermarket & a suit to the baseball if it makes you happy!

9. Learn from the best. Take makeup lessons, see a personal stylist, ask your hairdresser the best way to blowdry your hair & watch your manicurist carefully. Even if you don’t do these things professionally, there is no reason why you shouldn’t benefit from their experience.

10. Smile. Be grateful for what you have. Appreciate your life.

Extra For Experts:
What’s Sexy About Women Over 50? from match.com
Why Women Over 50 Love Their Age from WebMD
Over 50 and single? Rediscover your sexy side from msnbc
Porn’s New Focus: Over-50 Crowd from the San Diego Tribune
Fashion Over 50 from about.com

Love letters & feather headdresses,

My Eye Makeup Makes Me Look Like A Clown!

[ 25 July 2007, 12:16 ]

Photo by Lorraine MD

“Recently, some of my relatives gave me an AMAZING make-up kit. It has great color selections, especially in the eye make-up department. At the young age of 13, I want to keep my make-up relatively subdued, but whenever I put on anything other than a sheer beige color, I can’t help but feel like a clown! You often wear bright, crazy eye make-up, and I was hoping that you had some tips for wearing them with confidence.”

My best advice to you is to experiment, experiment, experiment! Take digital photos of the different looks, put them on Flickr or Livejournal & get people to tell you what they like best. I used to go out looking horrific, but it took me years until I realised!

The other option is to attend a short makeup course (which is a fabulous use of time & money, since you’ll know how to do your makeup properly forever) or to get a makeover at a cosmetics counter. I suggest booking a time & asking a lot of questions!

The internet is a great way to see what other people are doing with their makeup. Have a look at the MAC group on Flickr for inspiration. Look at the latest MAC looks & boggle at the work of Pat McGrath.

The thing with eye makeup is that everyone’s eyes are a different shape, so what works for me may not work for you, & vice versa. I know most women put eyeliner on the inside of their eye, but if I do that, I look like a squinty-eyed freak! I also recently discovered that putting dark makeup along the bottom half of my eye makes me look old & kind of like I’m dying. Not good, argh! When I wear bright colours (like green or blue or purple or red), I really only do a line of it behind my top lashes & leave it at that — if I put the colour over my entire eyelid, it just swamps my eye & it’s too much. If I’m using a neutral colour, like a soft pink or gold, I can put it over my eyelid & it looks great. So, again, it’s all a case of experimentation.

Good luck!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Hello Blondie!

[ 13 July 2007, 22:44 ]

New haircut! (If you’re wondering why iCiNG was quiet today, it’s because I was in the hair salon from 2.30 until 7!)

I love the cut so much, I think it is gorgeous & couldn’t be happier. The colour, however, is another story. It looks GREAT in those shots, but that’s because you can’t really see the top. There are bands of orange/brown where my colourist said they didn’t want to apply more bleach because they feared my hair would break. (I always need a double application & they didn’t want to go for a third.)

Tomorrow it will be purple. Or pink. I have a bottle of each. What do you think? (Poem unintentional.)

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Hand & Nail Care

[ 20 June 2007, 11:08 ]

I have had so many requests for this article, & finally, here it is! I’ve made it into a three-parter: handcare at home, how to give yourself a manicure & how to choose a manicurist.

Handcare At Home

I never used to take very good care of my hands. I was always biting my nails, so I thought that my hands were beyond help. Why bother? Finally, sometime last year, I removed a whole lot of anxiety from my life which also had the pleasant side-effect of meaning I was no longer interested in biting my nails. They started to grow & I didn’t really know what to do with them, so I started going for manicures & then taking care of them myself.

I have always had very soft hands — soft enough that when people shake my hand, they usually comment on it. I think partially that’s genetics, but there are probably a few other contributors. Whenever I wash my hands, I try to use very gentle soap. Since working at Lush Cosmetics, I have been unable to go back to generic, supermarket-bought soap. I loathe the stuff, it stinks & it dries my hands out. A lot of the ingredients in those standard soaps are nasty, so I do my best to avoid them. My favourite Lush soaps (in case you’re interested) are Honey I Washed The Kids, Rock Star & Alkmaar.

I also try to keep my hands out of water as much as possible. Your nails swell when exposed to water & then shrink back, which can make your nails more brittle than they should be. Use gloves when you do the washing-up or any other cleaning around the house: a lot of those cleaning products are NOT meant to hit the skin.

Other things you can try include:
Cuticle cream — I adore Lush’s Lemony Flutter, & when I worked in the shop, I applied it every day & saw an ENORMOUS improvement. (The key is in consistent usage.)
Hand moisturiser — I like good old cocoa butter, I don’t really think there’s anything better, & try keeping a bottle with you at all times for best results
Putting Vaseline on your hands before you go to bed & sticking them in a pair of cotton gloves
Dipping your fingers into a cup of warm olive oil for a few minutes, then rubbing the oil into your hands
Giving yourself a weekly manicure (see below)

How To Give Yourself A Manicure

In my experience, this works best if you’re somewhere warm & relaxing, with good music & a decent chunk of uninterrupted time.

You will need:
Cotton balls
Nailpolish remover
A nail-file
A small bowl
Cuticle stick
A clear base/top coat of polish
Nailpolish

Remove all traces of old nailpolish with a cotton ball & a bottle of nailpolish remover. If you’ve been using cheap nailpolish, you might find that your nails are a bit stained. (My favourite nailpolish, Maybelline’s Cherry On, is like this.) If this is the case, do it thoroughly! Just give them a good going over & it should be okay.

File your nails next. The shape you make them is up to you — some people like a sharp tip, but the most popular shapes are a rounded-off square or an oval. File in one direction only, try to avoid going back & forth if at all possible. Make sure they feel smooth. If you have a file which will buff or shine your nails, use it!

Put your hands under running water. Use a little bit of soap & make sure you clean your hands properly. You really need to make sure all the little nail fragments are gone, so that your nailpolish goes on smoothly.

Take a small bowl & fill it with warm water. Soak your fingers (including your thumbs) for ten to fifteen minutes. Some people will put something in with the water, like olive oil, but this is entirely up to you. When you’re done, dry your hands off on a towel.

Push back your cuticles with (you guessed it) a cuticle stick. Hopefully they will be nice & supple after all that soaking, but if not, you might want to use some cuticle butter to facilitate the process. Please don’t clip your cuticles! Ever! It’s a very fast & efficient way to get an infection due to bacteria & fungi.

Okay, time for the base coat! Use something clear. Start in the middle of your nail at the cuticle, moving the brush toward the tip of your nail. Then do one stroke on either side. Do every nail, then let it dry.

Now it’s time for the normal nailpolish! I advise picking an exciting colour! Yes, you could go with traditional pale pink, which is certainly a good classic, but why not try midnight blue, glittery silver or neon pink? (If you don’t like it, you can always take it off again!) I am an OPI nailpolish addict, & I love their Night Brights & Garden Party collections, but your mileage may vary. Another tip — try buying your nailpolish on Ebay. Usually bottles of OPI cost $20 here, but I can buy them on Ebay (including shipping) for about $8. Awesome.

Apply the nailpolish the same way you did the base coat — start in the middle, brush toward the end, then do either side. Let it dry off. You might find you need to do a couple of coats.

Now apply a top coat! I use the same stuff for my base & top coat. The top coat will help prevent your nails from chipping & it will make your polish last longer, so if you can be bothered, it’s definitely worth doing.

Congratulations, you’re done! (If you wanted to give yourself a French manicure, here’s how it’s done.)

How To Choose A Manicurist

If you’d rather have someone else do all the work — & I don’t blame you — getting a professional to attend to your nails is the way to go. It can be a very relaxing way to spend half an hour.

To find a good manicurist, do some research online or if you have a friend who gets regular manicures, you should ask them where they get theirs done & what they think of the service.

As with anything other than the bare necessities (like paying your power bill), I am a strong believer that you should only give money to people who make you feel great or in exchange for an excellent product… so when you walk into a nail salon, if you don’t feel good & comfortable, just leave. Good service is really important to me. If the staff at one salon aren’t pleasant to you, don’t worry, there are a million other people dying to take your money who will be good to you!

Other things to keep in mind are whether they clip cuticles (BAD!) & whether they sterilise their tools. You can ask them this over the phone if you like. A lot of salons will give you the tools they used to take home with you, which I think is marvellous. The manicurist (& the client) should both wash their hands with antibacterial soap before starting (or the manicurist should wear gloves).

When you’re ready to take the plunge, just go in & ask them for a manicure. They will usually give you a few options, like a full polish or a French polish (white tips) or just a basic shape. Take your pick, have a seat & enjoy!

Finally, use your discretion in terms of what you think the service is worth. In big cities you can get a top-class manicure for $10, while in other places (like Melbourne) it seems impossible to get a manicure for less than $30.

Extra For Experts:
Things You Shouldn’t Do (If You Care About Your Nails)
How Can I Stop Biting My Fingernails?

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Zee 'Air Down There

[ 13 June 2007, 11:07 ]

“Dear Gala,

I have a question that I often throw around and debate with people, and would like to know your perspective on it (being the fashionista that you are!). In today’s modern society where image, especially body image, is emphasised and sex seems to be very liberal – what is the stance on pubic hair in modern society? Is it expected to be more on the bald side these days, or can you still look like a wookie ‘down there’ and be seen as attractive? What is seen as ‘good hygiene’ in the way of pubes? I’m often intrigued as to whether there is an official-like social stance on the matter. Especially since the rise in trend of getting a landing strip, brazillian or, if male, the more daring crack sack and back wax. Is it a conditioning and construction of society, or a natural progress of the sexual revolution?

Should society be proudly bald, taking away a visualisation of adulthood, or should we proudly be growing a chia pet between our legs? And do you think porn has influenced the stigma of having pubic hair?”

Well! Here we go then, eh?

History lesson, ahem!

“Waxing of the genital areas has been prevalent in many societies around the world for centuries, in Ancient Greece, Rome and Egypt but especially in arid or desert, predominantly Muslim and Arab countries. Arab, Turkish, and Persian women as well as women from the Albanian culture and Mediterranean regions have for centuries been waxing in the genital areas. The waxes used were often sugar-based and made with lemon; however present variations include oils and scents to lessen the discomfort. The reasons for genital waxing in these regions have not necessarily been for cosmetic reasons throughout history, as it is in the case of North and South America as well as Europe, but instead these cultures mentioned above have generally practiced waxing for centuries more for reasons of personal hygiene and/or religion. As a result, in many of these cultures, body hair of any sort on women is considered socially unacceptable. However, waxing the genital area completely is relatively new to modern Western cultures, developing mostly in the 20th century. In the United States, for example, the habit of waxing or even shaving the pubic area did not become common place until the 1960s.

The Brazilian wax originated in Brazil for women wanting to wear the then-new thong bikinis, which was not widely popular inside the United States at the time. Brazilian waxing gained huge popularity through the late 1980s & has boomed in the last couple of years in the US. Legend has it that the J.Sisters beauty salon in New York has helped spread the name out.“
From Wikipedia.

In reference to the original question, I don’t know if the argument is as simple as “taking away a visualisation of adulthood”. There are lots of other aspects of adulthood — such as mortgages, 5 screaming children & saggy bottoms — which in the past we were expected to just accept & deal with. These days, we are free to deny, embrace or alter these conditions as we see fit. The Brazilian falls into the latter category. It’s a cosmetic thrill & enhances your look just like having your eyebrows shaped does. Why only take care of SOME parts of your anatomy & neglect others?

I know that a few years ago, when the Brazilian craze hit, there were a great many women who were worried that removing their pubic hair would suddenly turn their husbands into child molesters or pedophiles… or something. The logic in this argument is interesting, to say the least, but I don’t think that going bald is going to turn dear hubby into Gary Glitter.

Pubic hair might make you look like an “adult”, but quite frankly, so do breasts & thighs. Hair that (quite frankly) obscures the clitoris serves no purpose, so why not whip it off? It heightens sensitivity, looks superb (in my opinion) & will give yo’ lover a thrill.

“That’s the thing about the Brazilian. It makes you do crazy things. You have to be very careful who you invite to Brazil.” — Samantha Jones

Now, I’m not going to kid you. Brazilian waxing hurts. It is an ordeal. Every time I get one, I swear I will never go back… & yet. Shaving is such a hassle: growing it back is ugly & irritating & it requires constant work (exfoliating or re-shaving). Waxing is also fairly expensive, but then, you would have to pay me a fair chunk of change to be attending to women’s hairy, secret parts all day long too. The good thing is that once you have it done, it lasts a long time — 4 to 6 weeks.

“I got mugged! She took everything I got!” — Carrie Bradshaw

Maybe it’s just the generation I’m from, but I am keen on hair removal. I tweeze my eyebrows at least every couple of days; I even shave my arms. This kind of obsession extends to more intimate areas, too. Here are my personal preferences.

On women, I think a ‘Hollywood’ or ‘Sphynx‘ Brazilian (totally bald) or a landing strip Brazilian (a line of hair down the front) is the way to go, whether you shave or wax to get it that way. If you simply cannot be bothered with all the maintenance this style requires, then you need to at least trim. I really don’t think there’s any excuse (or reason) for anyone to be completely wild in that area anymore. I actually tend to think that most women (of my generation at least) all have some kind of pubic upkeep routine, & you’d be in the minority if you just let it grow. Most of the women I know go completely bald — it seems strange to me to just neglect the area, almost backward. I feel that as liberated, sexually-active women, there is almost a responsibility to “put it out there”, be familiar with & proud of our genitals. Is it just me?

I think all men should trim. Not to do so is just discourteous. Shaving or waxing is perhaps a little bit extreme — I don’t personally think it enhances the aesthetics of the area, so, you know. Save yourself an hour. It’s not like anything anybody needs is going to be hidden away, unless perhaps you’re 80 & have never touched your, um, thicket! Just a little upkeep is nice!

I did some research (*moustache wiggle*) & I really couldn’t find anything referencing pubic hair “trends” that had been written more recently than about 2004. A shame, really, since I’d like to know what the recent style is. In the early 2000s, suddenly Brazilian waxing was a hot topic, & every print publication featured humorous anecdotal pieces about visits to strange Russian sadists brandishing tubs of wax & small paper underwear. After that stage, though, there is nothing, zip, nada — somewhat like a full Brazilian itself — to be found on recent trends in pubic hair grooming. For all I know, women in Germany are flocking to Matilda in Baden-Baden who will shave a maze into your crotch.

I thought about calling some beauty salons to ask them what’s popular these days, but that’s only really going to tell you what the pubic scene is like in Melbourne — not hugely useful. Then I thought, hey! I have an international audience of astute, independent thinkers! Maybe I should ask them!

So, is anyone game to talk about their, uh, pubic preferences?!

Extra For Experts
“261 People Want To Do This… get a Brazilian wax“ — with anecdotes & all. I particularly like this comment: “I am determined to do this, both for me and my boyfriend, also because I am having a baby soon and if I don’t I’m worried they won’t be able to see the baby as it’s coming out!!”
Nerve.com interview with a Brazilian waxer. Her tips? Drink two glasses of vodka beforehand, & ensure you’re clean first! (Arrrghhh!)
Some Like It Trimmed, from WebMD.
Tips from a Brazilian waxer, thanks to Yes But No But Yes.
This is hilariously badly-written, maybe by someone from Belarus (after the recommended two glasses of vodka)? “You are welcome to join the club of pubic hair shaving.” Well, thank you very much!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Making Short Hair More Interesting

[ 29 May 2007, 09:52 ]

“I had my hair cut short for the first time a few months ago, and I love it. Not having to worry about bad hair days is marvellous. But I’m getting bored with it looking the same all the time! Since you’ve got short hair, too, I wondered if you’ve got any tips for making it look more interesting?”

I have, indeed, had short hair for years. In fact, it hasn’t been longer than my shoulder since about 2000. Now, some of these things will depend on the length of your hair at present, but here are some different ways to wear a short hairstyle.

Change the colour
This is probably the most drastic way to change your hair. You don’t need to do the whole thing if your work/school prefers you to look conservative or you’re just afraid to commit! You can always do a big streak across the front or put in some extensions. When I was 15 & had a blue-black bob (I was totally channelling Amy Blue in The Doom Generation), I would get extensions put in the front of it, hanging down on either side of my fringe (bangs to you Americans). They were the same length as the rest of my hair but provided a nice frame. The royal blue ones looked the best. Most hairdressers can put extensions in your hair for very little & it’s a quick, easy way to change your look. If you DO want to go blue, purple, bright red or neon yellow, read this first!

Wear hair accessories
They are your greatest ally. I have a drawer full of things to put in my hair: purple butterfly-shaped clips, turquoise feathers, small pink roses, tiaras & hairclips with all manner of things stuck on them, from glittery cupcakes to small ballerinas to Hello Kitty heads. Remember that it is incredibly easy to make your own hair accessories, usually all you need is a hot glue gun, a plain hairclip & stuff to stick onto it. Another option is to go slightly crazy & eke your way over to decora, a Japanese street style which involves wearing hundreds of little plastic toys all over yourself.

Cut yourself a fringe (bangs) or sweep them across
You might want to look at How To Choose A Flattering Haircut before you do this, because some face shapes don’t suit a fringe (bangs). If you sweep them across & they won’t stay, use a hairclip — try a diamante barrette. Sometimes keeping a fringe sitting flat is tough — some people swear by blow-drying it & curling it under with a brush, some use pomade & others use a combination of spit & crossed fingers. If you can pull it off though, a fringe is VERY cute.

Tease or spike it up
The bigger the better, baby! Teasing your hair is easy — grab a big clump, brush it towards the sky & then brush it back down towards your head. Repeatedly. Coat with hairspray (or talcum powder, I like Lush’s Candy Fluff for this purpose) & go out looking wild. Spiking it up is usually achieved with the aid of hair product, like KMS. You can try a little faux-hawk or just create a peak on the highest point of your skull.

Change the parting
Switch it up, from middle to either side or, if you’re handy with a comb, try one of those strange zig-zag partings.

Pin some of it up
My hair’s getting longer so I’m doing this quite a lot at the moment. I tease the hell out of it & then pin some of it behind my head. It somehow gives the appearance that I have far more hair than I do, which is always a good thing. To me, it looks like a weird mix between hobocore & elegance, & overall I’m pretty happy with the effect!

Put it into little pigtails
Self-explanatory, innit?! Use ribbons or lace for super plus plus cute effect.

Shave it!
Shave the side, or a pattern into the side, or shave your hairline back. All of these things have worked for me!

Wear a headscarf
Ahhh, yes. My trusty fallback position. When all else fails, when it is windy or raining, when your hair won’t behave or you have 5cm of regrowth (like me), just tie a scarf over your head. How To Wear A Scarf may be of some assistance, & so might How To Tie A Turban.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Adopt A New Skincare Routine

[ 11 May 2007, 11:12 ]

I’m not going to lie to you — changing your skincare routine is a major fiasco. It makes me quite nervous, actually. There is such huge potential for disaster. If you have something which works for you, I strongly recommend sticking to it. Don’t get sucked into the vanity of wanting to use Chanel skincare if Johnson&Johnson makes your skin glow — you will regret it.

Why would someone want to change their skincare routine in the first place?
In my case, I had to change mine because my favourite moisturiser (Afterlife by Lush) was discontinued in Australasia. A tragedy, since I loved it & had been using it for years. Other reasons might be that you’re breaking out regularly, your skin is too dry or too oily, your cleanser stings your face, or you want to upgrade to a more adult or glamorous brand (don’t do it!).

Now that you’ve established that you want to pull the great switcheroo, here’s how to go about it.

1. Research.
The first thing you should do is work out the attributes of a product you’d like to use. Does price matter to you? How about fragrance — would you rather something that smells amazing or something fragrance-free? Do you want a product with a good reputation or does that not bother you? You get the picture. For me, the most important thing about a skincare product is that it’s fairly natural, & by this I mean lots of plant-based ingredients & very little in the way of preservatives or alcohol. There aren’t a lot of companies doing that kind of thing, so that automatically narrows the pool.

From here, you need to find out about companies which you think might be in line with what you’re after. The controversial Paula Begoun, aka “the Cosmetics Cop” (pshhhh) has a handy little search function on her website. You can use this to get overall reviews of brands, & also individual assessments of pretty much any makeup, skincare or haircare product ever invented.

Do, of course, keep in mind that this is one woman’s opinion — & of course, she hasn’t tried the vast majority of these things. (Can you imagine what a mess her skin would be if she was using a different product every day?!) No, mostly she just reads the ingredients list & makes an assessment. I disagree with a lot of her reviews, BUT it’s a good place to start.

Once you’ve read up on that, head to Makeupalley for a real review. Makeupalley is amazing, a community site where cosmetics-obsessed individuals write their thoughts on everything in their makeup cabinet. It’s great for getting a balanced perspective on things, & you can rank reviews by average rating, too.

2. Obtain samples.
I think it’s important to go to the beauty counter of the company you’re interested in & talk to one of their staff. They know what they’re talking about, & they can look at your skin & make recommendations of what you might like to use. They also have interesting insights — you might think your skin is dry, when actually, it’s just dehydrated. They are trained professionals so take their advice! Don’t feel bad about getting samples: you should take as many as you possibly can.

If they don’t give out samples, walk away. Seriously. WHY anyone would spend hundreds of dollars on a product that may or may not work is beyond me. Some products get rave reviews, but everyone’s skin is different & there is no guarantee that anything will work for you!

3. Try, try, try again.
When you’re changing your skincare routine, try to go slowly if possible. In my case, I was using a Lush cleanser, a Lush toner & a Lush moisturiser. My moisturiser was almost finished, so when I went to the Aesop counter, they gave me a moisturiser which suited my skintype as well as some cleanser. While the temptation to use both of these products was great, I held myself back, & I am glad. Why? Because if your skin starts to break out, you won’t know why. Best to substitute one product at a time.

Here’s the bad news — it can take a long time, sometimes up to 3 weeks for your skin to show a reaction to a skincare product. I know, it’s bad. Often, cosmetics companies aren’t very keen on giving away 3 weeks worth of free product, & I can understand why. My suggestion to you is to use as little as possible, make it last the distance. (The sneaky may like to go back for more samples.)

4. Buy the smallest size you can & keep your receipt.
Smile at yourself in the mirror. You fought the beauty industry & won!

When skincare goes wrong…
Another week into your routine, you might break out, get a rash or feel like your face is melting. It happens! If it does, you’ll be glad you kept the receipt. Take it back to the store. Usually when you do this & explain the problem, they’ll exchange your bunk product for something which is more suited to your skintype. If not, shake your fist angrily & return to your prior skincare routine.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Style Tips -- 10th May 2007

[ 10 May 2007, 13:32 ]

Photo by Geishabot

Make yourself a bento box for lunch! More economical than buying a dried-out, overpriced sandwich, & how could you not feel wonderful about eating something with a little nori smile?! (If you need some inspiration, check this out — it’s the happiest food in existence!)

Change your voicemail message. Have you noticed that most people’s answering machines are dreary & a yawnfestival at best, if not downright obnoxious? Make yours cute! When I was a kid & we first got an answering machine, I would record a new message every few days, in different accents & with different themes. It’s never too late to be nutty, you know.

Paint your toenails glittery. This goes for men, too! Especially as (some of us) are heading into winter, it’s like a superb surprise every time you take your socks off to get into the shower.

If it doesn’t offend your sensibilities too much, research some crystals & buy the ones you think you could use. I recently bought 3 bracelets — amethyst, fluorite & labradorite. I can actually feel them working. Am I a kook or what?!

Buy little perfume samples off Ebay so you have a variety of fragrances for the hottest (or coldest) part of the year. My summer pick is Miss Dior Cherie. My winter pick is MAC Cosmetics’ MV2 or Lolita Lempicka Midnight.

Print out huge copies of your favourite photos from Flickr. Stick them above your monitor, on the inside of your bathroom cabinet, in your Moleskine, on the fridge, etc. Instant inspiration!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Small Questions

[ 8 May 2007, 22:55 ]

Quite often I receive emails asking me questions about fashion, style & the like, & while everyone would benefit from hearing the answers, they don’t necessarily require a huge response. Here I will endeavour to answer multiple questions at once, so if you feel like asking me something which might fit here, don’t hesitate to email me!

In these first few emails, I tackle thick ankles, long-lasting lipstick & how to make freckles look even. If you have any additional hints or tips, feel free to add them in the comments below!

“Spring’s coming (for the northern hemisphere anyway) and brings forth the question of footwear – flip flops, strappy heels, wedges, whatever. Now I have, erm, sturdy ankles, and was wondering if there were any styles of shoes that can flatter and slenderize the ankle area, or do us gals with the thick ankles just have to suck it up and live with it?”

Really, it’s all about proportion! Anything with a thin, pointy toe is a bad call; in contrast to your ankle it will make you look enormous. An ankle strap will make your leg look slightly strangulated, & a low kitten heel will make you look hefty. Avoid all of those! Your best friends are simple sandals/thongs/jandals/flip-flops (they don’t need to be rubber, elegant ones do exist, just be sure to avoid any with an ankle strap), clogs (they will give you shape) & anything chunky (this will make your ankle look delicate by comparison). You’ll also look good in a wedge mule. Good luck!

“Is it possible to get any red lipstick (bright red lipstick), which I can kiss my boyfriend with, without leaving a huge lipstick mark on his cheek? Last time he got bored because he ended up with red marks all over his face…”

I’m not a fan of those long-lasting lipsticks. In my experience they are VERY drying. My mother always used a lip sealer, which is almost like a varnish you put over your lipstick. It will keep your lipstick on all day, it is quite amazing. I don’t know what brand she uses, but I found Make Up For Ever’s Lip Plus Lipstick Sealer on Sephora which seems like it would certainly do the trick. As for red lipstick, my favourite is MAC Red by MAC Cosmetics, but I know that MAC’s Russian Red is very popular too.

“Can you recommend make-up products and tips for those of us who have freckles? I’m in my 30s and have had freckles since childhood. I don’t want to cover them up or hide them, but I would like to know how to blend them evenly with my foundation, blush, etc. Sometimes it’s hard to get an even tone to one’s skin, when it isn’t even toned to begin with. Again, I don’t want to hide or cover up my freckles, but I still want to look stylish and sophisticated. Any advice?”

Unless you want to get rid of your freckles entirely, without makeup your skintone is always going to look a bit uneven. That’s the bad news. The good news is that freckles are really cute & you can still wear sheer foundation over the top. They’ll still be there but the foundation, applied properly (after cleansing, toning, moisturising & using a primer), will make your face look radiant & healthy.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Rock A Wig

[ 2 May 2007, 18:08 ]

“Oh my gosh, will you please write an article on how to wear a wig! I’ve tried cheap ones on at novelty shops before, but they just look like a Halloween costume on me. But your looks just wonderful, like I actually thought you dyed your hair for a minute. It doesn’t have to look completely natural, but I would love to know how you pulled that off without making it look like it was just a silly costume. Also, what did you do with your hair underneath it?”

Dear Anonymous (psshhh! I’m going to call you Greta),

The most important thing when it comes to wigs is that you spend as much money as you can. I know it probably seems like I say this a lot, but really, it’s true. You get what you pay for. Cheap wigs are obvious & it doesn’t matter what you do to it, it’s always going to look wrong somehow. While a more expensive wig is not necessarily superior, they tend to be better as a general rule. My black wig wasn’t very expensive, I paid $65 Australian for it (about $53 American), but it was bought wholesale so I got a good deal on it. It’s not amazing quality but it’s okay, & since I don’t intend on wearing it a whole lot, it will serve its purpose very well. If you’re planning on wearing your wig regularly (like more than once a week), you should spend more.

Definitely take your time when buying any kind of hairpiece. It really needs to suit you, & if you’re not sure, go away & think about it. There’s nothing worse than something expensive that doesn’t get any wear! You should feel comfortable in your wig — it’s like any other item of clothing, if you don’t feel good in it, it will be obvious & it won’t look right. If you’re not sure what kind of hairstyles suit you, I wrote an article on how to choose a flattering haircut which will help!

Having said that, buying a wig doesn’t need to be boring or predictable. Your hair doesn’t have to look “real”, per-say, just good! You have the ability to wear anything you want, so if you’d like to rock a purple bob or long white ringlets, you can! Have fun with your appearance; surprise yourself!

Make sure you take care of your wig! They’re usually sold in plastic bags, but a polystyrene head or something else which is round is optimal for the wig to sit it on. Brush the wig (with a steel comb) before you put it on & then brush it again once it’s on your head.

When I bought my wig, I knew the fringe (bangs) were too long, so when I got home I had my friend trim them. If you’re going to do wig surgery — which is almost always necessary, in my experience — go slowly! If you hack a big chunk out of it, it’s not going to grow back, so be careful! When we started trimming my bangs, we trimmed about half a centimetre at first, then looked at it & talked about it some more before doing anything else. After a bit of adjusting & fiddling, we decided the bangs would look best if they were sitting just above my eyebrow, so we trimmed it back to there. The good thing about this is that if I want my bangs a bit shorter or longer, I can change them by sliding the wig back & forth. If you’re nervous about screwing this up, take your wig to a salon & have a professional attend to it.

I wear a stocking over my hair when I put a wig on, as well as clipping the hair under it. It just keeps all your natural hair in place. Also, sometimes the rubbing of a wig will give you a bald patch, so a stocking is a good way to prevent this. Put the wig on (put your thumbs in the front of it & hook it over your head), shake it out a bit, give it a comb & once it’s in place, grab some bobby pins & pin it to your natural hair. Otherwise it will slide around & it’ll sit too far back on your head, which looks pretty ridiculous. When you’re putting it on, make sure it is pulled down all the way in the back. If the wig feels loose, take it off & adjust the band.

Try wearing a scarf or a hat over your wig.

If the wig still looks a bit fake, or you’re not entirely comfortable with it, put a hair or a scarf over the top. Since this covers a large portion of the wig, it’ll seem more realistic, & for some reason when you do this, no one will ever suspect you’re wearing a wig. I went out last night wearing a scarf over my wig & I felt fantastic & confident — kind of like a spy! My new hair gave me the confidence to be a different person, with more wiggle in my walk & coy little smiles.

I know a lot of women with cancer who are undergoing chemotherapy are terrified of having to wear a wig, but I have read a lot of accounts of women who find that it actually gives them a lot of freedom & a wonderful opportunity to expand the horizons of their appearance. In season six of Sex & The City, Samantha develops cancer & finds herself in a wig shop, trying to make herself look like “her” again. She’s very distraught because she’s going to a movie premiere & she can’t find anything which resembles how her hair used to be. However, later in the show, you see her at the premiere wearing a bright pink wig, & it looks magnificent. Keep that in mind when you’re wig shopping!

If your wig looks really shiny & unrealistic, a light coating of baby powder will help dull the sheen. Apply it with a powder brush, then shake off the excess. You can also buy special wig styling spray to keep a handle on flyaway hair & weird kinks etc. that your wig might have. Both of these things can help to make your wig look better on.

Above all, have fun with it! I now own two wigs — the black bob & a big pink afro, & I want more! I’d like a white bob & a beehive too…

Extra For Experts:
How to care for all different types of wigs — very useful information.
How to put long hair under a stocking cap — because if you just pull your hair into a bun, it’ll look like you have a tumour under your wig!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Eyelash Extensions!

[ 30 April 2007, 16:12 ]

Before.

After. Just call me Bambi.

I had heard about eyelash extensions but never really considered getting any myself. To me, they seemed to fall into the realm of those women who require excessive upkeep, & that has never really been my thing! However, when I received an email from Pascaline of Lady Cil inviting me to try a set, I jumped at the opportunity. Seriously, who doesn’t secretly want to look a little bit more like Bambi?!

It was very exciting because I have never even worn false eyelashes before. I was an eyelash treatment virgin! I have attempted to stick falsies on before, but god they look awful, it’s a very drag queen-esque scenario.

A day later, I was on the way to undergo my transformation. Pascaline is adorable, a very sweet woman with a lilting French accent who can definitely be trusted to look after you & put you at ease. I lay down on the massage bed (complete with yellow angora blanket) & closed my eyes.

Pascaline applied a cooling pad to my eyes, which also had the advantage of sticking down all my lower lashes so they wouldn’t get in the way. Then I… well, I did nothing. I lay there with my eyes closed as we listened to French music & Nina Simone, talking a little bit but mostly just relaxing. There were tweezers & glue & a strange device which puffs air (to dry the glue) whizzing around above my head, but for the most part, I was blissfully unaware!

The eyelash extension process is very labour-intensive, because when you apply an extra eyelash, it needs to stick to one which is mature, but not too much — otherwise, if it’s too mature it might fall out quickly, & if it’s not mature enough it may not have the strength to hold an extra one. That’s part of why it takes so long. My session lasted about two & a half hours, but when you consider that there is one woman individually attaching 45 new eyelashes PER EYE, it makes sense.

The end result AMAZED me. Pascaline uses thick black lashes which create a very obvious, but still subtle, effect. I was so thrilled when I looked in the mirror, my lashes were long & thick & gorgeous. The best thing is that I don’t need to wear eye makeup at all, in fact it almost looks excessive — which also means that I wake up looking amazing! It’s SO GOOD!

The cost of an initial treatment is $200 for a set, but after that, refills are only $40 & they only need to be done every 3 weeks or so. $200 is, admittedly, quite expensive, but I believe it is absolutely worth it… & think of all the money you’ll save on mascara! However, I have GOOD NEWS! Pascaline has offered to do a “Gala special“, which is 30 eyelashes (instead of 45) for $150, with a FREE refill included. How awesome is that?!

A couple of my eyelashes have fallen out so far, & I had it done 3 days ago, but they still look excellent & that’s just the way eyelashes are — they fall out! Plus, that’s what refills are for…

The website warns that it is an addictive procedure & oh my god, IT IS, I am obsessed. I feel so glamorous, but quite frankly, the photographs speak for themselves. I am not wearing ANY makeup in these shots, I took them just after I got out of bed!

Man, I love these eyelashes so much. If you’re in Melbourne, definitely check out Lady Cil & if you have any questions or queries, get in touch with Pascaline. She is so adorable & I’m sure she would love to hear from you!

Okay, I’m going to go & bat my eyelashes in a winsome manner now…

Note: In the interests of full disclosure, you should know that I received my set of eyelashes in exchange for a fair, honest review of the service. I believe that my honesty & integrity are of utmost importance, & I am never going to falsely hype up something that I don’t really love. I haven’t omitted any information at all — I would consider that a disservice to you, my readers, who I am crazy about! Pascaline knew this was a chance she took at the time, but thankfully, I adore her work — & you will too!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Daily Outfit -- 27th April 2007 -- Part Two!

[ 28 April 2007, 13:39 ]

Shirt from Cue
Blue cardigan by Country Road
Olive shorts from Workshop
Large fishnet stockings
New Rock platforms

A rejected outfit from yesterday. It looked cute but my New Rock platforms took an absolute pounding when I was in Wellington & they need to be glued. Boo. I didn’t want to wear them out in case they totally fell apart on me.

What I wore instead.

Lacy bra thing
Blue cardigan from Country Road (quickly becoming one of my favourite things)
Black leggings & a black slip
Shoes by Alexandre Herchcovitch for Melissa
Coat by Laurie Foon — HOW cute is that coat?! So very.

Also… yesterday I had eyelash extensions done. Write-up coming SOON!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Ebay Glee

[ 10 April 2007, 12:15 ]

Items purchaed on Ebay at midnight:

1. Ganache for Lips in Chocolate Hazelnut flavour. “The only lip balm containing real Scharffen Berger chocolate!” I am very impressed by the ingredients list: sweet almond oil, apricot kernel oil, beeswax, shea butter, unsweetened Scharffen Berger chocolate, vitamin e, hazelnut extract, cocoa extract, rosemary extract. That is some natural sheeit.

2. Flavigny rose pastilles. They are anise seeds coated in flavoured sugar syrup — in this case, rose. Oh my god, delicious.

3. Smith’s Rosebud Salve. I have been looking for this all over the place but for some reason, I can’t find it in Melbourne. Thankfully I found it for next-to-nothing on Ebay. Some people think it is just vaseline in a nicer tin, but I hear it is good for cuticles, break-outs, dry patches of skin, etc. Here’s hoping!

4. Perfumeria Gal Colorette rouge in rose (aka “ballerina pink”). I bought this absolutely on a whim, thinking it would probably be average — I really just liked the tin. (How could you NOT like that tin?! Never underestimate the importance of good presentation!) However, my sleuth-like snooping has uncovered (thank you, makeupalley.com) that this product scores an average of 4.8 out of 5 (& those girls are hard to impress), with everyone raving about the colour, staying power & general quality of the rouge. Woohoo! I have needed some rouge for a long time. I have some in a cream form from M.A.C., but I don’t like applying it that way & the colour is too light & glossy for it to look right on me. I think I may have struck gold — I will let you know.

5. A string of pearls.

What have you bought recently?

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Super-dry Skin

[ 2 April 2007, 12:10 ]

“This may sound strange, but I love your skin! It’s really hard to pull off fair skin unless it’s absolutely flawless like yours, which sucks for us pale chicks. I have about the same skintone as you, but I have two major problems…

1) My skin is EXTREMELY sensitive and dry. I exfoliate and moisturize twice a day, but my makeup still always comes out looking caked on due to my extremely dry skin, so through-out the day, my makeup gets this “chipped-off” look. It seems like no matter how much I exfoliate and moisturize, or which products I use, I’m always doomed with dry, flakey skin.

2) I have been wearing makeup for a decade but I still have yet to find “my” shade. As far as foundation and concealer goes, I’ve gone through everything from the cheap drug store stuff, to MAC, to Bare Minerales and I still always come out orange! Even makeup artists who’ve “matched” me have never gotten it quite right. I’m very cool-toned, so it seems like anything that isn’t nearly pure-white will make me look orange; and I can’t seem to find a shade THAT light by anyone.

So, since you’re the epitome of perfect porcelain skin, I was wondering if you could give me any tips for either of my problems.”

Hello!

You say you exfoliate twice a day, which I think is probably overkill. Once a week should be enough, seriously! You’ll probably be doing your skin damage. You really need to be good to your face! Are you using cleanser? If not, start! Buy something that doesn’t foam & is made for dry skin. I would recommend Lush’s Ultrabland. It’s meant to be a makeup remover, but it is very moisturising. Whenever I use it, I end up skipping my moisturiser step, because it’s so nourishing. Of course what you use is up to you, but you definitely need to be cleansing every morning & night.

I remember one winter I had the WORST skin. It was so incredibly dry & itchy & flakey. I felt hideous & I tried about a million different moisturisers to try to fix the problem, but I didn’t know a lot about the subject at the time, so ended up buying products containing alcohol. Ouch! They stung my face & I wondered what the hell was going on.

Anyway, long story short, that was the beginning of my love affair with Lush. I walked into one of their shops & talked to one of the sales consultants about the problems I was having. The girl gave me a sample of their Skin Drink moisturiser, & a couple of days later I went back exhilarated & bought a pot of it. In my opinion, it is the ultimate dry skin fix. I have never found anything that works better, & I really strongly encourage you to give it a try. If there’s no Lush store near you, you could call your nearest Lush mail order outlet & see if they’ll send you a sample to try. You might have to buy something first (like a piece of soap), but they tend to be pretty good about it.

Generally, dry skin is caused by one of three things: genetics, diet or environment. The first one is pretty self-explanatory (how is your mother’s skin?), the other two not so much. With diet, this basically means that if you’re not eating well, it will be reflected in your face. A steady stream of Burger King & diet soda is going to play havoc on your skin. It’s true that what we eat matters! Start drinking a lot of water every day (say 2 litres), eat fresh green vegetables & as much fish as you can handle. If the environment is the problem — cold weather, an air-conditioned office, harsh winds or hot sun can all be culprits — as well as the dietary suggestions, you could try putting a humidifier in your bedroom which runs at night. This will help get some moisture into your skin.

Try taking supplements. If you’re vegetarian or don’t want to eat lots of fish, you can take Omega-3 oil. This comes from fish & flaxseed, you can choose the type you’d prefer to take. Zinc tablets are also helpful. (That page also lists vegetarian sources of zinc, but I personally find it much easier to pop pills than to remember to eat 100 pounds of sultanas every day or whatever.)

You might be unwittingly adding to the problem by using a skin toner between your cleansing & moisturising steps. A lot of toners contain alcohol which is going to make it worse. You should also avoid getting water on your face as much as possible. I find water incredibly drying, & my skin is pretty normal.

Give all of those things a go, but if you’re not seeing any improvement with these things, try using olive oil instead of moisturiser.

If after this you’re still not seeing an improvement in your skin’s condition, I would strongly suggest seeing a doctor for a referral to a dermatologist. It’s pretty rare that a dermatologist is unable to help with a skin problem. They have expert knowledge & a lot of prescription-only products they can get you to try, which often are much more effective than off-the-shelf treatments.

With regard to your orange foundation problem, you could try using tinted moisturiser instead of a foundation, but really that’s a problem that pales (ha!) in comparison to your dry skin. I encourage you to get that sorted out before you start slapping new potions on your face, which may aggravate the problem. You may find that after your skin comes right, it will be so beautiful that you don’t even need to wear foundation. Here’s hoping anyway!

I use M.A.C. shade NC25, which is pretty light, but they have some REALLY light shades (NC15 & NW15 are the lightest). If they’re not working for you, consider mixing your own colour. Of course, this will mean you’ll need to buy two instead of one, but hell, if it works it works. I would also suggest trying M.A.C. Select Moistureblend SPF 15 foundation. It’s a very moisturising foundation with good sun protection.

Good luck!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Concealer Recommendations

[ 16 March 2007, 11:12 ]

“I need a new concealer. I don’t particularly want to spend heeeps of money on it but I want it to be a good one and to last a while (ie not a tube skinnier than my pinkie finger!). I like to use the creamier ones (as opposed to a concealer stick) I find these blend a lot easier. Do you have any suggestions?”

Why, of course I do!

I am a total M.A.C. fiend, as we all know by now, so I’ll tell you what I’ve used by them.

I currently use M.A.C. Select Moisturecover, which comes in a tube with a little fuzzy wand applicator. I never use the fuzzy wand though, I find the design a bit counter-intuitive & it doesn’t give me a lot of control. Instead, a dab a little of the concealer on my finger & apply it that way. It gives pretty good coverage, especially underneath the eyes (which is where I generally need it, I am Little Miss Dark Circles!).

In the past I used M.A.C. Select Cover-Up. It looks like the smallest tube ever, but I have only ever used this & the Select Moisturecover above… & I have only ever bought one of each. Seriously, this stuff lasts for YEARS. It’s very good for light coverage.

I am, however, intrigued by M.A.C. Studio Finish Concealer SPF 35. I suspect it’s a bit heavy, being “studio fix” (& especially given that it says it will cover tattoos), but I have recently discovered that I quite like heavy coverage. If you apply a studio product lightly (much less than you normally would), it looks fantastic — really natural, it gives a beautiful effect. Sometimes the M.A.C. girls will ask if you’re sure you want to buy any of the studio products, especially if you have good skin — but for days when you feel like you want a really good, clean look (most days, for me), the studio products are great.

Hope this helps madame! I’m almost out of Select Moisturecover & think my next purchase will be the Studio Finish Concealer for sure.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Moisturiser

[ 14 March 2007, 17:55 ]

Part of my Lush collection. It’s sick, I know.

Since I recently ran out of Afterlife, my favourite ever moisturiser by Lush (which has been DISCONTINUED, the horror!), I have been on the search for something as good to replace it.

It is not easy.

I have tried every Lush moisturiser I own with little success. I am currently using Cosmetic Lad, but it is average & really not thrilling me much. I think Gorgeous is much too thin, Skin’s Shangri La is far too heavy & the others smell… bad to me. It is so frustrating. Am I going to have to go to another company?! I also would really like something with a bit of SPF in it, & the only Lush moisturiser which has that (Ultralight) is way too thick.

What moisturiser do you use?

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Get A Great Tattoo And Never Regret It

[ 14 March 2007, 14:20 ]

Tim Kern, tattoo artist & chicken lover.

While tattoos can be fantastic & beautiful, they can also be hideous & embarrassing. This article will tell you about the sort of things you need to consider before you get a tattoo, how to pick a design, how to choose a tattoo artist & how to look after it once it’s done.

I love my tattoos (I have two half-sleeves), but before you get any, you need to think about the fact that getting a tattoo is a big deal. It might come out looking terrible, you might hate it, you might be allergic to the ink they use, your parents may never speak to you again, you may become unemployable (depending on what you get & where) & YOU WILL HAVE IT FOREVER. Unless you can afford laser removal which, I understand, is very expensive.

There are lots of good reasons for getting a tattoo. There are also a lot of bad ones. For example:
You want to piss off your parents. You want to look tough. All your friends have them & you feel left out. You want to profess your undying love to your new girlfriend via ink on your skin (dude, just send a card). You want to be cool. You’re drunk. Your friend needs someone to practice on. Et cetera.

I have seen so many bad tattoos — so bad they make me cringe when I think about them. I know a guy who went somewhere “cheap” to get his done & he ended up with a tattoo that is crooked. It is so embarrassing! My point is, getting a tattoo which doesn’t suck isn’t that easy. The proliferation of ugly tattoos on the shoulders of the great unwashed is proof of that.

Where do you want it?
My suggestion (at least for a first tattoo) is that you get it somewhere which is easy to cover for work. Anything below the wrists or above the neck is a pretty bad call, though there are a lot of tattoo parlours which won’t tattoo anyone there anyway. Remember that people really like to judge anyone with a tattoo. My friend is about to get his knuckles tattooed & I dread the day he has to go to court for a traffic violation or travels internationally.

How much do you want to spend?
The answer should be “as much as it takes”. Please, never go anywhere & say “Oh, I only have $100, what can you do for me?”. I have spent thousands of dollars on my arms (& that’s before you even factor in that I flew to New York to get Timmy Kern to do one of them). You should plan your tattoo with your artist first, get an estimate of cost, & then go away & save your money! It’s for life! Remember?!

What are you going to get?
Most tattoo artists have pages of what is called flash art up on their walls which you can pick from. I always thought that was quite a bizarre thing… you walk into a parlour, have a cursory glance around, then say to the man behind the counter, “yeah, gimme ‘horny little devil #6’, right here”. It’s so meaningless! I actually knew someone with that exact tattoo, it was painful to look at.

If you’re not sure of what you want, try making a list of things which appeal to you (aesthetic or otherwise). Make it three pages long if you need to, just brainstorm & rattle off as many things as you can think of. I did that for both of my tattoos. The first list (when I shrunk it down to the things I actually wanted on me) said: siamese twins / candy / cupcakes / teacups / fortune cookies / hearts. The second one said: swanboat / hot air balloon. If you can find pictures of the things you like, print them out & take them to your tattoo artist. This will help them a lot.

A reader just suggested that if you’re getting something in a written in a foreign language, make sure you check with a native speaker to ensure it says what you think it does!

I found a tattoo online which I really like…
No! No no no! Please don’t rip off someone else’s tattoo. It smacks of lame. A tattoo is meant to represent you, not someone else! People go to a lot of effort to design tattoos which are individual to them, & unfortunately this kind of thing happens all the time — which is one reason why I don’t really like posting full pictures of my tattoos online. Call me paranoid, but it’s almost like asking for someone to steal it.

Well, I found some art online which I really like…
Ask the artist for permission. They will probably be delighted, but it’s definitely polite to ask first. My siamese twins are two of Fawn Gehweiler’s characters joined together, & I definitely asked her whether it was okay!

How do I find a good tattoo artist?
Shop around. Have a look at Bmezine & search for artists in your area. Ask people online, ask your friends, then go into the shops & talk to the people who work there. Ask to see their portfolios — the flash on the wall is usually purchased from another company & is in no way indicative of their talent. A good tattoo artist should have social skills (i.e., not make you feel like a chump), be professional, polite & talented. If you find one you like, make an appointment for a consultation, & take in your ideas for your tattoo.

Okay, my artist drew something up for me, now what?
I am possibly the most cautious person ever. I once had someone draw me up a tattoo, which I then taped to the head of my bed so I could look at it every night & see whether I got sick of it. I did, so I knew I shouldn’t get it tattooed on me. (Looking back on it, I am SO glad I didn’t have it done. Phew.) Anyway, I would suggest doing something similar. Put it somewhere that you can look at it often.

It’s been months! I still like the design.
Get yo’ butt to the tattoo parlour, then! When they press the design onto your body, have a GOOD look at it in a mirror to make sure you REALLY like it. It can still be altered at this stage, so don’t feel like you’re being a pain if you want a slight change.

Does it hurt?
Yes, but not as badly as you think it will. Some areas (on top of bone, for example) hurt more than others, but it’s pretty bearable. If you’re worried about it, try taking some Tylenol beforehand. The best thing to do is concentrate on breathing slowly. Endorphins will kick in, & you won’t feel it as much. It also helps to think about other things than a needle in your arm — take a friend to talk to if you want, or make conversation with your tattoo artist. I’ve seen some people take mp3 players along, but I just think that’s kinda rude.

How do I look after it?
Tattoo artists have different aftercare methods, so do whatever your tattoo artist tells you to do. Basically, while it’s healing, keep it moisturised (but not over-moisturised) & don’t pick at it! Don’t go swimming, sit in a sauna or expose your new tattoo to sunlight. This will impede the healing process & can cause infections & other nasties.

It’s healed! I have a tattoo! I’m the coolest person ever!
Why yes… yes, you are. Remember to ALWAYS put sunblock on your tattoos whenever you go out in the sun. Otherwise your beautiful tattoo will fade & look sad, & we don’t want that.

A warning:
If your tattoos are visible to other people, they often think it is okay to touch you & ask inane questions. You will need to get used to this. They will ask you if it’s real (...) & then give you their opinion. You can deal with this however you like but I suggest reading my Avoiding Creeps article.

Extra For Experts:
rec.arts.bodyart tattoo FAQ will answer every question you could possibly have, including tattoos getting stretched, tattoo removal, etc.
Thousands of tattoo pictures from BMEzine — remember to use them as inspiration only!
Consider this a warning.
Blacklight!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Rock A Beehive

[ 5 March 2007, 00:24 ]

Audrey Hepburn’s stylish beehive.

“Hello, lovely! First off, thanks for being awesome! Love love love the site! Secondly, I have a question. Do you know of a tutorial or something on how to do your hair like a 60’s beehive? I don’t know if mine is long enough yet but I have decided to let it grow for the moment & I am DYING to do it in a beehive! I know you have short hair, but you are the only person I could think to ask something like this. Thanks!”

Well… since you asked so nicely!

I have never had a beehive but they certainly do look AMAZING. My mother used to tell me stories about her friend Valerie’s beehive. My mother never had one, I think she always kept her hair pretty short, but apparently they made quite a sight when they went to the Ilford Palais together, Valerie with her huge hair & my mother with her “flat head covered in a white silk scarf” (her words, not mine).

Apparently a beehive was a lot of work. Women would fight for beauty salon appointments on a Friday afternoon so that their hair would be done for the entire weekend — & they would sleep with their hair wrapped in a scarf so it didn’t get ruined (or use silk pillowcases). I understand that pool parties were also very unpopular around this time!

A role model for young beehivers everywhere.

A beehive will work best on hair that hasn’t been washed for a few days, & optimally your hair will be about shoulder length. The secret is all in the backcombing. If you don’t know how to backcomb your hair, it’s very easy — take a section of hair, brush it upwards in a vertical motion, then move your comb to the back of the section & brush it back down again. Keep going all over your head so that you end up looking seriously demented with huge tufts sticking up everywhere.

Before you start this, you really need to decide whether you’re going to sweep the whole lot upwards & together or whether you want to conceal the backcombing. If you want to conceal it, exempt a large front section of your hair from the backcombing trauma, & then sweep this back over your fluffy bits. You can then use a clip or headband of some description to hold it in place.

Styling the beehive is a very delicate task & is best done with the hands rather than a comb. Pat it into an acceptable shape & then grab a can of hairspray. Go crazy with the stuff. Your hair should be solid as a rock but look light & fluffy. Spray & style, spray & style. You might also find it helpful to whip up some kind of elaborate mirror set-up, since you’ll need to see the back of your hair before you leave the house.

When you go out, you will need a good tail comb in your handbag to keep it looking pristine & to tuck away anything that strays from your perfect coiffure!

Beware, this is definitely a high-maintenance hairstyle — I wouldn’t advise running, jumping or exceptionally vigorous shopping if you want it to hold its shape.

As you can imagine from my instructions, constructing a beehive is not easy & I suspect this is why so many women preferred to place their tresses in the capable hands of a hairdresser… However, I’m sure that with a bit of practice (& a lot of hairspray) you’ll end up with a very stylish do! Good luck miss!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How Do I Choose An Eyeshadow Which Suits Me?

[ 26 February 2007, 01:12 ]

“My mother is not one of those women who wears a lot of make-up. The most she’ll ever wear is foundation and powder. Unfortunately for me, that means she can’t give me tips or tricks on choosing or applying make-up. How do you choose an eyeshadow and once you’ve found one, how do you go about wearing it? Sounds silly, but I’m desperate for help.”

Not silly at all! When I was first learning about eyeliner & eyeshadow, I did some hideous things. My eyes are quite an unusual shape, really big but also kind of almond, so the way most girls do their eye-makeup looks REALLY bad on me. If I line the inside of my eyes (which it appears about 90% of women do), I look like a little weasel & ditto if I try to do a “smokey eye”. I use colourful eyeshadow on an almost daily basis but when I do, I always use it around the outside of my eyes like you would with eyeliner, otherwise I look really tired. I will sweep eyeshadow across my eyelid occasionally but only with neutral colours — I have a very sheer gold & a light pink which work well for this purpose.

Experimentation is good for you, so don’t be afraid to try things out. As you can see from my experiences, not everything works for everybody, so really your best tools are a mirror & some time! I remember going to a M.A.C. counter years ago & asking what colour eyeshadows would suit me. They couldn’t really tell me, & instead suggested I just try a whole lot of different shades. I now wear various shades of blue, green, pink, purple & gold with great success.

Don’t try eyeshadow on the back of your hand. It really doesn’t tell you anything about how the colour will look on your eye since the skin is completely different. Try it on your eyelid, & if you don’t like it, just use some makeup remover & start again.

Remember to consider your skintone when trying eye makeup! I’m a winter & yellow eyeshadow makes me look like I am dying. It’s not very attractive.

Whatever your eye colour, try a colour which is next to it on the colour wheel. For example, I have blue eyes, & green & purple shadows look really good on me. If your eyes are green, try yellows & turquoise. If your eyes are brown, try oranges, golds & pinks.

Makeup artists are your friend. Most of them are great people & they absolutely love to try things out on willing victims participants! Take a digital camera with you so you can get an accurate assessment of the colour.

Buy a good eyeshadow brush & take care of it. Also, if you wet the eyeshadow brush before dipping it into the colour, it will go on more vibrantly & look brighter.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Matching Personality To Fragrance

[ 11 February 2007, 14:54 ]

Demeter is a truly remarkable company creating scents which smell like laundromats, bonfires, creme brulée & pretty much anything you can think of.

They already have a significant list of celebrity consumers — Kate Moss & Clint Eastwood like Dirt, Drew Barrymore wears Gin & Tonic & Sofia Coppola is a fan of Tiger Lily.

I love to look through the list of fragrances & imagine myself wearing them, but often I think that I would have to be a certain type of person to wear, say, Stable (hay, muck & animal sweat) or Thunderstorm (humid air & soil).

Here then, are some of my scent suggestions for various people I hold in high esteem.

Paperback + Riding Crop = Violet Blue

Paperback is the scent of a sweet & slightly musty paperback book, while Riding Crop is the smell of worn leather. I can’t think of a more perfect combination for Violet Blue, a motorcycle-lovin’, robot-building, San Francisco-based sex writer — especially since Demeter hasn’t created a cupcake fragrance yet! Violet is one of my favourite bloggers, always entertaining & lascivious.

Funeral Home = Angelina Jolie

Funeral Home is a blend of white flowers (lilies, carnations, gladiolus, chrysanthemums), mahogany & oriental carpets. Angelina Jolie, though now a huge celebrity, had a hard time growing up just like everyone else. She was ostracised at school for being skinny & weird-looking, & for wearing glasses & braces. She got heavily involved in the punk scene as a teenager & has had three highly-publicised relationships. When she wed her first husband, Jonny Lee Miller, she went to the altar wearing black leather pants & a t-shirt which had his name written on it in blood. The media went nuts upon hearing that she & her second husband, Billy Bob Thornton, wore vials of each other’s blood as necklaces. Which of course is nothing compared to the craziness that ensued when she got together with Brad Pitt. (Team Jolie! Team Jolie!) Anyway, the point is, Angelina Jolie is great & as a child, her dream was to be a funeral director — hence the perfume selection.

Honeysuckle + Ocean + Pink Lemonade = Weetzie Bat (from the book of the same name by Francesca Lia Block)

Weetzie Bat doesn’t get a picture since, unfortunately, she is the product of someone’s imagination (though according to Wikipedia, Francesca Lia Block is writing a screenplay to bring Weetzie to the screen!). Weetzie Bat lives a life of playing in the ocean, looking out from behind the Hollywood sign, driving around in convertibles & drinking lemonade. I think the combination of these three scents is the ultimate happy Californian girl fragrance. I can picture a girl strutting around, smelling like this, drinking a milkshake & listening to “I Want Candy” by Bow Wow Wow on her headphones.

Espresso + Orchid + This Is Not A Pipe = Mary-Kate Olsen

Mary-Kate, who is often seen clutching a venti takeaway Starbucks cup & a cigarette, doesn’t really need this fragrance blend since I assume it is how she smells already — but if you want to imitate her, be my guest! Now, I’m not completely classless, this isn’t just the smell of the Mary-Kate diet — I also threw in a little orchid, since that’s her favourite flower. (I am a sad, sad fangirl.) you MK!

Bubble Gum + Laundromat = Violet Beauregarde (from Charlie & The Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl)

Violet is a competitive tomboy who compulsively chews bubble gum. She holds the world record for chewing a piece of gum for the longest amount of time — she chewed one piece for three months solid. When not over-working her jaw, she likes to stick the gum behind her ear or on the headboard of her bed. The bubble gum smell is an obvious choice. In the most recent portrayal of her (Tim Burton’s 2005 film), she is also seen as a competitive over-achiever with medals & awards for every sport you can possibly think of. Hence the laundry smell — a sporty girl like that would need her clothes washed constantly.

Holy Water + Dregs + Myrrh = Jesus

I kid, I kid.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Questions Answered With The Power Of Science!

[ 8 February 2007, 06:27 ]

Dear Gala Darling,

I’ve been having hair trouble lately; I have a lot of broken strands of hair, that make my hair appear frizzy. What shampoos and conditioners can I use to make them stop standing up without weighing my hair down? I’m also skeptical on buying any hair product right now, because I heard a lot of the drug store brands carry silicone, which someone told me is bad for your hair. Is that true?

I’m not very wealthy, so I don’t know if I can even afford to buy anything that isn’t a drug-store brand… but is that what I’m going to have to end up doing?

Sincerely,
K.

Dear Ms. K.,

Unfortunately, this is a problem where I was absolutely stumped for an answer. Haircare is a source of great confusion to me, but at the same time, I wanted to find you an answer!

Thankfully the online fashion world is not all girls with a penchant for big shoes (cough, cough). There are also people with great knowledge which can be applied to beauty, like my friends over at The Beauty Brains. They are genius scientists who answer questions about tricky things like makeup, hair loss & how your favourite products work. Thankfully, they answered this question on my behalf! Here’s what they said:

“We’ve answered similar questions before. Here is a post we did on “are silicones bad for your hair?“ The bottom line is that NO silicones are not bad for your hair. In fact, silicones are some of the best conditioning ingredients available.

“And only some store brands contain silicones. The most popular products like Pantene, Fructis, Dove, and Herbalessences all contain silicones. But some products like Tresemme and some Vive formulas do not contain silicone. To figure out if something contains silicone or not look for ingredients like Dimethicone or Cyclomethicone. These are silicones (and great conditioning ingredients).

“As to the original question about what to do with your frizzy, broken hair, use a conditioner every time you shampoo! If you have fine, thin hair try a 2-in-1 shampoo like Pantene or a good moisturizing shampoo like Tresemme Vitamin E moisture shampoo. You absolutely do not need to spend a lot of money on Salon brand products. They DO NOT work better!! Please don’t waste your money.”

Hope this helps you!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Beat Problem Skin Into Submission

[ 4 February 2007, 10:12 ]

A question:

I was wondering if you had any advice or product recommendations for those of us with “problem” skin. I still get acne at the age of 27, and though I have been searching for years, I can’t seem to find anything to control it. I am loathe to ask advice at a department store, as I’ve tried so many things before that either make my break-outs worse, or in some cases cause an allergic/sensitivity reaction (Thanks a lot Neutrogena and Estee Lauder!). I’ve started using Angels on Bare Skin from Lush after you recommended it here, and it has improved the texture and look of my skin, but has done nothing to help clear it up (yet…). I’m also using a benzoyl peroxidase cleanser, that seems to reduce the breakouts, but it’s quite harsh – it actually burns the skin on my neck if I don’t wash it all off at night! I already eat well and drink plenty of water, and yet…

Hi kitten.

Here are my thoughts.

In terms of Lush products, if you’re breaking out I would recommend something other than Angels On Bare Skin. Angels is a great product, but it’s pretty ineffective when it comes to spots. Angels is part of my daily routine, but if my skin is giving me trouble, I switch up my regimen.

My complete “oh my god my skin makes me want to throw myself out a window” routine from Lush would be:
Cosmetic Warrior mask
Fresh Farmacy or Herbalism as a cleanser
Tea Tree toner
Enzymion or Celestial moisturiser

Cosmetic Warrior
This is an incredibly stinky mask made from fresh garlic, eggs, grapes, honey & tea-tree oil. When I say fresh, I mean FRESH! Pots of it are kept on ice in the Lush stores, & when you get it home, you need to put it in the fridge. (You might want to tell whoever you live with that it is not hummus or some other delicious concoction for spreading on crackers. Be warned!) Anyway, like I said, it is stinky. It pongs. It is vile. Rank. Repulsive. But the importance of owning sweet-smelling cosmetics falls away when you realise that… it works. I like to coat my face in it about ten minutes before I take a shower. Let it dry out & then wash it off. Use it a few times a week for best results.

Fresh Farmacy
An amazing cleanser. Amaaaazzzzzing. It’s made in huge blocks, & if you want some, all you have to do is walk into a Lush store & ask them to cut you a piece. It’s light pink & kind of a soft consistency — my recommendation is that you keep it somewhere dry, or it will disintegrate. It contains calamine (which is what gives it its colour) to soothe the skin, & a wonderful combination of antiseptic oils to stop spots. Lather it in your hands, wash your face with it, then rinse off.

Herbalism
The other cleanser alternative is Herbalism. Herbalism has the same consistency as Angels On Bare Skin & is used in the same way — get a pea-sized amount, mix with a bit of water, smooth over your face then rinse off. Herbalism is basically the Angels counterpart for people whose skin gives them the gyp — not as strong as Fresh Farmacy, but will do the trick if your skin can be mildly problematic.

Tea Tree Water
This is a toner containing copious amounts of tea tree oil, which is great for angsty skin. After using your cleanser of choice, spray some of this on your face & remove with a cotton pad. It’s really a lovely toner. Keep it in the fridge for hot summer days.

Enzymion
Obviously you need to choose a moisturiser which is right for your skin-type. As you didn’t mention yours, I’ve given you two options: Enzymion & Celestial. Enzymion is a great moisturiser for people with skin that is prone to oiliness. Grapefruit & lime oils will invigorate your congested wee pores. It’s excellent for matte-ifying your skin while keeping it soft & lovely.

Celestial
Celestial is Lush’s best moisturiser for truly sensitive skin. Most “sensitive” moisturisers smell awful — not so with Celestial. Vanilla water & almond milk sweetly fragrance the concoction. It’s a very gentle formulation, containing glycerine & cocoa butter as well as dove orchid extract. Parfait.

Everyone’s skin is different, so what works for your friend may not work for you. The best thing you can do is try, & if something doesn’t work, don’t lose hope! Just try something else. If Lush isn’t your thing — or you want some other options — here’s some basic information which may help you.

Most people think that if they can feel their skin “tingle” while using a product, it must be doing a good job. THE OPPOSITE IS TRUE. That “tingling” (unless it comes from peppermint oil or similar) is your skin being irritated. Stop using anything that causes this feeling!

Use a 1% or 2% beta hydroxy acid product (BHA) or an 8% alpha hydroxy acid product (AHA) to exfoliate your skin. BHA is apparently more effective at cutting through oil, so it’s the preferred option, but some people are allergic to it, so will need to use AHA.

Benzoyl peroxide & tea tree oil are about equal in terms of disinfecting the skin & fighting spots.

If all else fails, prescription treatments may be a good option for you — try Accutane, Retin-A, Differin or Tazorac — but quiz your doctor like crazy & do your own research before embarking on any course of medical treatment. Okay?

Extra For Experts:
Here are some books with good ratings that might give you additional information:
The Acne Cure by Terry J. Dubrow & Brenda Adderly. 4/5 stars on Amazon.
The Clear Skin Prescription: The Perricone Program to Eliminate Problem Skin by Nicholas Perricone. 4.5/5 stars on Amazon.
6 Weeks To Sensational Skin by Loretta Ciraldo. 4.5/5 stars on Amazon.
Beauty By Nature by Brigitte Nars. 5/5 stars on Amazon.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

What Do You Spend Money On?

[ 2 February 2007, 12:25 ]

Everyone has different priorities when it comes to spending money. Some people spend up on almost everything, while others will pay as little as they can as often as they can.

Do you buy designer handbags & eat noodles for dinner?
Do you spend up on skincare but use cheap cosmetics?
Where do you draw the line?

I think it’s very important to spend money on things that will last, like shoes & coats. If you buy well the first time, it will save you money in the long run. I also think it’s crucial to look after your skin. If the only way my skin looked good was by buying La Mer products, then you better believe I’d spend the money — but thankfully, I survive on a combination of Lush Cosmetics (super-cheap) & M.A.C. skincare. (I switch on & off, it’s good to vary your skincare routine.)

However, I like to go cheap on most of my underwear — the cheap stuff tends to be much cuter! I also like to buy undershirts from the children’s departments of major stores, which is very inexpensive. While I have expensive taste in makeup, I like to save on it by buying it off Ebay (after trying it instore first). I’ve also never been very interested in expensive bags: I prefer to buy several at a cheaper price, that way I have more options.

How do you prioritise?

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Signature Scents

[ 31 January 2007, 20:43 ]

Coco Chanel said that you should wear perfume wherever you want to be kissed, & when Marilyn Monroe was asked what she wore to bed, she replied “two drops of Chanel No.5”. Of course, both statements were excellent P.R. for Chanel’s perfumes. I, personally, have never understood the appeal of Chanel No. 5. It’s lacking something.

These, however, are perfect — which is why I own them.

Lolita Lempicka Midnight
This is the grown-up version of the original Lolita Lempicka. Midnight is romantic & a more than a little dirty. Lolita is the perfect name for it — it smacks of adventures & forbidden love. Definitely the fragrance of a nymphet. I was about to buy the original Lolita Lempicka when I discovered that Midnight had just been released. I tried one on each wrist — initially I found it hard to pick the difference, but the more I smelt them, the more obvious their differences became. Midnight is longer-lasting, stronger & poutier, while I would say the original is lighter & more of a daytime fragrance. (Reviews.)

Demeter’s Birthday Cake & Violet & Champagne Brut.
I am a fan of combining Birthday Cake with Champagne Brut — totally the birthday party you wish you were having. I personally think Champagne Brut smells more like Nerds candy than anything alcoholic, but I think of that as a positive thing. Violet is a bit old-lady, & I threw it out one day when I was moving house. I regret it though, since sometimes I want to smell like an old woman. I am weird, I know. (Reviews for Birthday Cake, Champagne Brut & Violet.)

M.A.C.‘s MV2
I think this is pretty much the sexiest fragrance in existence. In fact, I was reading some reviews of it just now & had to run from my desk to put some on. God, I smell good. MV2 is a deep, spicy, delicious vanilla. It’s difficult to describe, though — I think maybe if a beautiful pink cupcake was wearing Louboutin heels & lying in an all-white bed, it would smell like this. Bizarre imagery, I know, but it’s the best I could do! (Reviews.)

Miss Dior Cherie
To me, Miss Dior Cherie smells like strawberry sorbet & youth. It smells like your first little black dress, a glamorous romance, boy bait. I received this at Christmas in 2005, & given the way my life was at that time, whenever I wear it these days, I feel sexy, desired, powerful & totally free. It is quite incredible. When I first smelt it, I wasn’t sure I liked it, but it grew on me very quickly. It’s not the sort of thing I normally go for, since it’s so fruity, but I absolutely love it now. It transforms me. (Reviews.)

I am pretty keen on the idea of these, too:

Demeter’s Cotton Candy, Riding Crop & Chocolate Covered Cherries. I think Cotton Candy & Riding Crop together would be an amazing combination. It would certainly surprise people… & it could definitely lead to mischief.

Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab’s Lolita sounds good, too. Humbert Humbert’s heart just skipped a beat. This is the quintesscential American nymphet scent: sweet and girly and innocent, with a bit off crass, bratty impertinance thrown in. Bubble gum sweetness (with built-in petulancy — you can just hear Lolita smacking her gum impatiently and rolling her eyes), heliotrope, lemon and a bit of seductive cherry.

As you can probably tell, I have a definite affection for anything that smells sweet but has a sexy twist. When I worked at Lush, I smelt like a walking Lush shop (& would often have people at bus stops ask me if I had been there recently). I was delighted when I quit, since it meant I could actually wear perfume & not have it overpowered by a menagerie of soap! Ebay is an absolute godsend, in that it enables me to buy small samples of perfume before committing to a huge bottle of anything (& to give you some indication, I have never finished a bottle of anything except Hypnotic Poison, my signature scent when I was about 15). On sad days I like to wear Thierry Mugler’s Angel — it smells like my mother (& my lovely friend Jo).

Do you wear perfume, body spray, scented lotion? What do you smell like on a daily basis? Vanilla pomade & earl grey & Marlboro lights? Your boyfriend’s deodorant & spearmint chewing gum? What do you like your lovers to wear? Tell me! I want male opinions too!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Daily Outfit -- 31st January 2007

[ 31 January 2007, 14:30 ]

Daily Outfit, 31st January 2007.

(Like the sneak preview of me at my desk?)

Navy blue silk headscarf (from my mother)
Blue-framed sunglasses (given to me by my friend Amanda at Burning Man last year)
Super-cheap t-shirt from generic chainstore
Gold vinyl high-waisted pencil skirt (from my friend Ana)
Black open-toed slingbacks
Three thin metal bracelets, watch from Fossil, ‘Black Onyx’ nailpolish by O.P.I., string of black beads

I’m going for a Parisian theme recently. I think it’s because of the black manicure — I feel that the only people who really carry this off effectively are either the French, goths or emo kids (& I would prefer to feel French). The black takes some getting used to. I haven’t had my nails this colour since I was actually, ahem, goth. (Don’t tell anyone.) At first I did, indeed, feel like Goth Hands McGotherson, but now I like it. I think the way to do is to set it with a lot of gloss & keep it immaculate. Also I think that if my nails were pointed, rather than the square shape that they are, they would definitely be veering into goth territory.

I did a wardrobe clean-out a couple of days ago, & am re-evaluating a whole lot of things I barely wear. Like, for example, this skirt. Previously I never wore it because the top & bottom 5cm of the skirt are unlined, meaning in summer it stuck to me — but I think that with a bit of jiggery-pokery in the petticoat department, I can fix that problem. Seems to be working thus far.

I feel very glamorous. I think it’s the lipstick (M.A.C. Red). Wearing red lipstick more often was one of my style resolutions for the year. I think I’m doing very well.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Makeup Basics Part Two -- Makeup Application

[ 29 January 2007, 13:57 ]

This is part two of my three-part series on makeup basics. The first article is here & covers skincare. Here is the email that started it all:

Being a guy I don’t usually wear makeup, but on occasion when going out I’ll throw some mascara on and maybe some nail polish. I like to be exuberant at times and was thinking of getting some eye shadow too. But in honesty I know next to nothing about the basics of makeup. Can you enlighten me?

Dear Soon-To-Be-Enlightened,

Hello again! Hopefully now you have a skincare routine which, as the name implies, you are practicing routinely. The next step is to go to a department store & talk to the sales consultants milling around the makeup counters.

My absolutely favourite brand is M.A.C. Cosmetics. I am always impressed by their products & it is a rare occasion that I will use something from another company. You should see my makeup drawer, it is an exercise in branding. Anyway, go to a counter that appeals to you. Every company has its different strengths & weaknesses, but you should only buy from a counter where they make you feel good & are helpful. There’s nothing wrong with getting them to test some products on you & then going away & seeing how long they last. Foundation, for example, often looks different on your skin in natural light than it does under the harsh lighting in a department store.

After I have gone through my skincare routine (cleanser, toner, moisturiser), I ALWAYS apply a primer to my face. My favourite is by M.A.C. (surprise surprise), but Napoleon Perdis does a good one too. I honestly don’t know how I survived without it, it is absolutely incredible. I can’t explain how it works, it’s too tricky for me to understand, but the effect is that it will smooth out your skin, giving you a wonderful base to work from & stopping your pores from absorbing your makeup — meaning it will last longer without needing to be re-applied. I use a face primer, but you can also buy primers for the eyes & lips. I haven’t used them, but I imagine the formulation is slightly different.

For Women:
You will want concealer, foundation, powder, mascara & blush to start. Eyeliner, lipstick & eyeshadow are optional extras & come in every colour of the rainbow. Once you start experimenting further with makeup, you will also want a few really good brushes. They make all the difference when it comes to how you look. They are expensive but worth it. Trust me on this!

Foundation:
The way you apply it will depend on the sort you buy, but you should use either a (slightly damp) wedge-shaped sponge or a makeup brush to make it look flawless. You don’t need to put it all over your face if you don’t want to — just dotting it on the areas you want to cover will do the trick. Be sure to blend your foundation well (especially around your chin, nose & hairline) & don’t use too much. It’s better to start with too little than look like you’ve applied it with a spatula!

Concealer:
You can apply this before your foundation if you like but I find that it tends to get wiped away if I do it in that order. I don’t use a lot of concealer normally, only to cover up blemishes & I usually put a bit underneath my eyes to disguise any dark circles I might have. Again, the key is to blend. When buying concealer, a lot of people buy it in a colour which is too light to hide spots or dark circles, then wonder why they look blotchy. Go darker!

Powder:
After the foundation & concealer, set with powder. Just take the powder puff & apply it softly to your face.

Blush:
Dip your brush in your blush. Look at the fullest part of your cheek. That’s where we’re aiming for. If you’re still not sure, suck your cheeks in to see where your “apples” are (no, I don’t know why they’re called that). Stroke your brush across this area & back toward your temples. Once you feel like there’s enough on, take a cotton ball & blend it in so it looks natural — a big streak of blush is nasty & probably not the look you’re going for.

Mascara:
It is amazing what an eyelash curler will do. So buy one! When I use one in conjunction with a liberal coating of mascara, I have had people ask if I’m wearing false eyelashes. (This is a good thing, since I’m terrible at applying falsies.) Curl your eyelashes — only the top ones (!). Go slow, be gentle… It hurts to catch your eyelid by mistake. I curl my eyelashes three times before moving onto the others. When you take the wand out of your tube of mascara, dab it on a tissue to get off the excess. Then take the wand & slowly move it from the root of your top eyelashes to the end. Initially you will blink like mad while doing this, but just go slowly. Work your way from the inside (nearest your nose) to the outside. Then repeat on the other eye. To do your bottom eyelashes, just lightly dot mascara on the ends of your lashes — too much & you will look tired & cracked-out.

Eyeliner, eyeshadow & lipstick are all fairly personal things — everyone does these things in a different way. I have met very few people who wear eyeshadow the way I do — I find that (with the exception of a couple of shades) shadow all over my eyelid makes me look tired, so I wear it just around the outside of my eye, more like a liner than anything. The point is that you should experiment with what works for you. I recommend booking yourself in for a makeover at a counter. Get the most bang for your buck by asking lots of questions & getting tips so you can recreate it at home.

Also, if you’re wearing lipstick, you should also buy a lip-liner in a matching colour. This will stop the lipstick from bleeding & looking messy. Apply the lip-liner first, then follow up with lipstick. Some people say that if you apply liner slightly outside your natural lip line, this will make them look plumper… but some people say this will make you look like a ridiculous clown. Proceed with caution my darlings!

For Men:
Thank your lucky stars, it’s much easier for you, as (unless you’re a drag queen) you’re probably going to want to wear less makeup. I went to my local M.A.C. counter this morning & spoke to a makeup artist & got some tips for men. She said that a lot of men go in there & buy concealer & bronzer, so don’t feel shy!

Remember to go through your skincare routine first (cleanse, tone, moisturise) & once your moisturiser has soaked in (give it five minutes), smooth primer all over your face. Leave this about five minutes as well, then onto the good stuff!

Foundation:
I suggest you use M.A.C. Select Tint SPF 15. It’s very lightweight & practically invisible to the eye — you’ll look much smoother but no one will know why. It’s oil-free, so for those of you with troubled skin (prone to breakouts or ouchy red shaving rash), it should be very easy to wear & present no problems. Another great thing about it is that it has SPF in it, so it’ll help protect your face when you’re out in the sun. When buying this stuff, I strongly recommend going to a makeup counter to get the right colour. Tempting though it may be to buy it online, do it properly, otherwise it’s a complete waste of money. There is nothing worse than foundation which is the wrong colour!
To apply, squeeze a little of the foundation onto a brush (I like M.A.C.‘s 190 Foundation Brush, but at $75 Australian, you might want to buy a cheaper one) & blend it across your face. Don’t use too much, & if it starts to look too heavy, feel free to take it all off (use some toner on a cotton pad) & start again. I usually start on one cheek, work my way down to my chin, then do my other cheek, nose, forehead, & around my eyes. The most important thing is that you blend it in well, which basically just means you need to use the brush a lot — don’t slap it on, rub it in. This will prevent you from looking like a bad transvestite. Yay!

Concealer:
If you still have some blemishes after applying your foundation, or dark circles under your eyes which you want to hide, concealer is your next step. I like M.A.C.‘s Select Cover-Up, since, like the Select Tint foundation, it is essentially invisible. If you use these two products in conjunction you will look flawless & delicious.
To apply, put small quantities (as in, VERY small quantities) of the concealer on a brush designed specifically for the purpose. (M.A.C. does a Concealer Brush, but again, it’s expensive. Worth every penny, but expensive, so if you can’t quite splash out on a great brush just yet, you can buy them from pharmacies for a fraction of the price. You can always upgrade later!) Press the brush against whatever you’re trying to hide, then blend the colour in well. Simple, & you’ll get better with practice.

Powder:
This is an optional step but in terms of setting your foundation so it doesn’t slide off, it’s a good thing to use. M.A.C. has an incredible Blot Powder, which will do the trick while also helping to prevent shininess. It’s a good thing to carry around with you. I always have it in my bag in hot climates, especially if I’m going out dancing. The other great thing about the Blot Powder is that it doesn’t add any extra colour or visible weight, so if you’re going for the of-course-I’m-not-wearing-makeup-what-are-you-talking-about? look, it’s perfect. Just press the puff against your face: cheeks, nose, chin, forehead.

Eyebrows:
If you’re concerned that your eyebrows are a bit wild, you could try M.A.C.‘s Brow Set in Clear, which will help stick down all those little stragglers that escape when you’re caught in a gust of wind.

If you want to get a bit more experimental with eyeliner, eyeshadow, mascara or anything else, I recommend talking to a professional! Most makeup counters will do a makeover for very little money (& the fee can usually be put toward products, too). There are so many different ways you can wear makeup, so don’t be afraid to experiment & learn from someone with an arsenal of brushes & colours!

Extra For Experts:
Drag Queen Makeup 101!
Wikipedia’s entry on cosmetics.
Malespecies.com sells a variety of products for men.
Strawberrynet.com (weirdest name ever) has a huge range of discounted cosmetics — very good service.
Sephora.com: your online beauty mall.
“Men belly up to the makeup bar” — article from the Chicago Tribune.
“Men develop enthusiasm for makeup” — article from The Press.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Fashion Report: Summer/Autumn 2007

[ 29 January 2007, 11:10 ]

Stop the presses! My personal fashion report leading through to the middle of the year.

I call this the “cyborg coquette”, combining the best elements of the 40’s, 60’s & the future. Glamour is important & grooming is a top priority. Work from a good base of neutrals (black, white, cream, camel, khaki, olive, beige) & supplement with bright slicks of cobalt blue, shocking pink, fire-engine red, vibrant turquoise, electric green, bright yellow.

Go for super-short dresses with a mod edge, worn with huge shoes — now is the time to learn to walk in them. Interesting stockings with a lot of texture & colour. Well-tailored pants with a wide leg should be worn with devastating heels or boots. Hunt out knitwear with avant-garde, surprising details & unusual lengths.

Hair is sleek & futuristic with an eccentric twist. Eyebrow-skimming, perfectly flat bangs are The Thing. (Invest in a ceramic hair straightener.) You will require a shiny (but small) clutch to hold sunglasses, cigarettes, cellphone, Moleskine & hipflask for short walks to the library — but for social occasions, a big bag is essential. Slung over a shoulder, it will add a casual air to a more formal outfit, helping prevent it from looking too perfect. For a more dressed-down version of this look, go harajuku/cyber: pair with funky stockings, legwarmers, brightly coloured beanies & knit-caps. On sore-feet days, wear flat but simple boots.

“Is this testing whether I’m a replicant, or a lesbian, Mr Deckard?”

MORE: Pearls worn with a super-modern ensemble, like a space-age Coco Chanel. Mirrored sunglasses (to maintain the mystery) removed to reveal a coy beauty-spot & doll-like blush. Shiny accessories: cuffs & collars in patent, mirror & plastic. Luminescent skin helps cultivate that I’m-not-entirely-human-yet look. Pouty lips in sugared pink or red are essential. Curl, colour & learn to look up through your eyelashes for optimal Humbert-snaring. Cultivate a fake accent for the season & bluntly admit to its inauthenticity. Insane accessories — make it fun by buying things with flashing lights from toy stores, anything with a child’s rocket motif, wear this hoodie.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Age Gracefully

[ 26 January 2007, 22:11 ]

I recently had an email from a woman who is nearing 60 years old. She is in incredible shape (I should know, I saw the photos) & has great style but is caught in the trap of getting older & being unsure what to do about it. She has thought about getting cosmetic surgery, but after a run-in with the wife of a big-shot celebrity (think Michael Douglas’ family tree), was disturbed when she realised that if these people with more money than sense can end up with hideously botched work, what would happen to someone like her?

The other thing is that cosmetic surgery still isn’t completely safe. Novelist Olivia Goldsmith, writer of The First Wives Club died in 2004 during “minor plastic surgery”. Call me opinionated, but some things are worth dying for — & some are not. For me, cosmetic surgery falls quickly into the latter category. It is so unnecessary. You’re getting old: you know it & we know it too. No amount of cosmetic surgery is going to hide that fact.

Of course, this is no reason to buy orthopedic shoes (unless you need them!) or to start wearing a twin-set & pearls & never look back. You don’t have to cut your hair short or get a blue rinse. You should always stay true to yourself, regardless of age. Epictetus said, “Know, first, who you are; & then adorn yourself accordingly.” (I like this quote much better than “you’re only as old as you feel”, which is cheesy, or “you’re only as old as the women you feel”, which is just revolting!)

The only rule is that there are no rules. One thing I would encourage is that you age gracefully — however you define that. The most amazing women I have met are not people who have been under the knife. One of them is my mother. She is 60 this year, runs a successful business & dresses with amazing style. She is never going to be a senior citizen to my eye — she takes great care of herself. Another is an ex-boyfriend’s mother. She has long hair, midway down her back, & she has been grey since her mid-twenties. She regularly colours her hair with henna, & it is a vibrant, radical orange. She is happy & loving & it makes her seem much younger than she is.

Nobody likes wrinkles, but they are going to happen. It’s just a fact of life. You should be happy you have wrinkles — it means you’re not dead! However, here are some things that will aid you in aging gracefully, & remember, it is never too early, or too late, to start.

Take good care of your skin.
Remove your make-up every night. Moisturise. Read my skincare article if you need a refresher course. Use an eye cream & a neck cream, but don’t just go for the most expensive stuff, since often there is no evidence it is any better than the products you can buy in a supermarket. Do your research! Read Don’t Go To The Cosmetics Counter Without Me by Paula Bedoun (though I would advise you take it with a grain of salt since everything she writes is very angry-sounding & that makes me wary). Use Google to learn about products, read what other women are saying in online forums. A tip: You can pierce a Vitamin E capsule & apply the oil to the fine lines around your eyes & mouth for a quick, inexpensive treatment that works really well.

USE SUNSCREEN EVERY DAY.
Normally I would put this under the “take good care of your skin” section, but it’s so important it deserves its own heart. Every time I see someone with sunburn or a woman with a wrinkly, leathery décolletage, I cringe (& hope they don’t see). Painful. Respect your body! Please!

Look at your family.
Examine your genetic background. Does your family have a history of heart disease or cancer? How are the older members of your family aging? Then do some research to find out how you can help prevent going down the same track.

Eat well.
Vegetables are good for you, & green leafy ones especially — they usually have the most nutrients & vitamins. (This is hilarious coming from me since I am about the pickiest eater in the world!) Eat fruit which is high in antioxidants like berries. If you can bribe someone to feed you strawberries, even better.

Keep your mind nimble.
I am convinced that a lot of people die soon after retiring just because they’re bored. Have fun & use your noggin! I read some research on living longer & it said that if you keep thinking, developing your intellect & stay socially engaged, you can increase your IQ even as you’re aging.

Quit smoking.
It’s stinky, expensive & it kills you. Not to mention it wreaks havoc on your skin.

Try non-invasive skin treatments if you really feel the need.
Cosmetic surgery is silly… you’re not fooling anyone. Women with the face of a 25 year old & the hands of an 80 year old are more terrifying & ghastly than any woman who has gone the natural route. Anyway, if you really must have something done, microdermabrasion gets good reviews. You could also try Botox, but please try not to get to the stage where you cannot express emotion with your face.

Plan for your future.
This is slightly grim, but should be mentioned. Work out how you are going to live once you retire. Statistics say that married women will probably spend somewhere in the region of 7 to 15 years as a widow (depending on the age difference between you & your husband). If you’re married & your husband controls the cash, learn as much about it as you can. Feeling in control of your future & having the knowledge you need to look after yourself will have a very positive effect on your feelings about getting older.

Exercise.
I’m sure I don’t need to explain why this is good for you. Your exercise routine will naturally change as you get older & you require different things from a workout. In your twenties, you should be exercising (to the point of breaking a sweat) three times a week for a minimum of 20 to 30 minutes. Try to do strength exercises twice a week. In your thirties & forties, you should be getting aerobic exercise daily, & women in particular also need to focus on strength training, or your bones will start to thin. You should be doing this about two or three times a week. Beyond this age, you should be careful about your exercise routine. If you can afford a personal trainer, it’s a very sound investment.

Be versatile & honest.
Accept that you are getting older. You may be getting grey hair, but it’s likely you’re the only person who is worried about it. No one is judging you because you’re getting older. Seriously. Most people will admire someone who is honest enough that they don’t need to cover up their age. Another thing about being versatile: be brave enough to examine your wardrobe & get rid of what is not working for you anymore. This, of course, is not age-specific, but I mention it because I used to work in a mall & every day, this 70 year old woman with varicose veins would limp past in extremely high heels. It hurt to look at her. You have to know when to give it up.

I called my mother on this subject for her advice. After all, I’m in my twenties, & don’t know a lot about aging. “What’s your advice on aging gracefully?”, I asked. “Work on your personality, not on your appearance,” she replied. I thought that was a little simplistic & easy for her to say — after all, she is a very good-looking woman & has excellent skin. (I grew up watching her go meticulously through her skincare regime every morning & night.) Then I thought a little more about it. The way you feel about life really is reflected in your face. If you’re sad or angry, you will contort your face accordingly. The more you do it, the more lined your face will become. We have all seen people with mouths that resemble a cat’s bum from years of pursing their lips in ire. (I am sitting here making strange faces to try to describe it to you.) If you’re happy & smile a lot, people will react much more strongly to the warmth you emit than the lines around your eyes. It’s funny, the older I get, the more pertinent all that cheesy, seemingly-useless advice of ore becomes.

I know everyone wants a quick fix, but unfortunately it doesn’t work that way. I can’t tell you what to wear, I can’t tell you what to do. Be true to yourself, look after yourself, love yourself & let yourself evolve. That is really the best advice I can give you. I hope it helps.

Extra For Experts:
If 60’s The New 40… a post about growing old gracefully from the inside out & a huge pile of comments, some very insightful.
Tightly Wound: The Wrinkle Manifesto. Hilarious!
“Having a face so tight that people could ice skate on it doesn’t increase your sex appeal. Because we all look at it and go, “Nice mid-life crisis, dude. Guess what? You’re still old. And now you’re still old and if you smile you run the risk of your face snapping off and landing on my tossed salad.”“

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How Wearing Make-Up Affects Your Career

[ 26 January 2007, 18:16 ]

Normally I wouldn’t make a post out of a single link, but this flabbergasted me so much I had to.

No makeup, no promotion? is an article from The Age, a Melbourne newspaper. It’s based around the recent study conducted by Hamermesh & Biddle who discovered that women who wear make-up at work earn 20 to 30% MORE than their make-up shunning counterparts.

Amazing. I’ve been saying this stuff for a long time — appearance is important & people judge you based on it — but I never expected a study to prove it so conclusively.

For those of you who tend to go au naturale to your job, never fear! Gala to the rescue! I’m working on a three-part series on make-up. The first one, Makeup Basics Part One — Skincare is available now, & the second one (on make-up application & where to start when you’re stumped) is coming very soon!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Daily Outfit -- 24th January 2007

[ 24 January 2007, 11:42 ]

Daily Outfit, 24th January 2007.

This is what I wore to buy a lamp & a salad!

Shirt from Zara (Norway)
Purple polka-dot tie from H&M (Norway)
Black super-flares from some weird shop in Camden (London)
Black pyramid-stud belt (San Francisco)
Platform New Rocks (also from Camden but bought about three or four years apart)
Purple bunny ears from a toyshop in Wellington (New Zealand) — they don’t call me bunnyhead for nothin’!
I am also wearing Parfait Amour eyeshadow from MAC (I love to match my eyeshadow to my accessories) & Miss Dior Cherie perfume.

I planned this outfit out yesterday (I saw the tie in my drawer & realised I had never even worn it!), thinking it would be too hot to wear & I would die of heat exhaustion. Ha! The weather is behaving beautifully, it is windy & procellous & my outfit is perfect. I forgot how to knot my tie but thankfully Google came to the rescue & gave me a diagram. Phew. Half-windsor ahoy!

I’m also wearing Miss Dior Cherie perfume for the first time in ages. It was created while John Galliano was listening to “My Cherie Amour” by Stevie Wonder, apparently! (Hey, that’s now three times I’ve mentioned Stevie Wonder on here!) I received it last year around Christmas, which, coincidentally was one of the most exciting romantic periods of my life. So now, whenever I wear it, I feel really gorgeous, desired, happy & free. The reviews I’ve read of it call it “boy bait” (seriously!) & say, “Miss Dior Cherie will grab you, dance around you in circles, and leave you craving for more” — from here. Anyway, it’s true. You should test it out.

This outfit is great, no complaints, I feel great!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Makeup Basics Part One -- Skincare

[ 21 January 2007, 23:27 ]

I recently received this email:

Being a guy I don’t usually wear makeup, but on occasion when going out I’ll throw some mascara on and maybe some nail polish. I like to be exuberant at times and was thinking of getting some eye shadow too. But in honesty I know next to nothing about the basics of makeup. Can you enlighten me?

Dear Soon-To-Be-Enlightened,

This is a pretty big topic, so I’ve broken it down into a few segments to make it easier to read & digest. This first section is on SKINCARE.

Just because you’re a man, your routine needn’t be any different from a woman’s, though I was once told about a marketing executive who made a mint by re-branding an exfoliating scrub as a “scruffing lotion” for men. Geez.

I heard a rumour a little while ago that Dave Navarro (of Jane’s Addiction & Red Hot Chilli Peppers fame) was bringing out a men’s cosmetic line, but according to his blog, it’s rubbish. A shame really, as the man surely knows his way around an eye pencil. Yes, sometimes he looks a bit like an evil magician, but he pulls it off. Rest assured, he’s not the only one dabbing on the old war-paint!! Apparently U.S. sales of men’s skincare products rose 13 percent in 2004, to $59 million (from here). Another man who wears make-up with finesse is David Bowie… but don’t tell Michael Douglas. (Shame he’s so judgmental, he was hot the year I was born.)

Now, please listen, as this is crucial: Applying make-up is like painting a canvas — you have to prepare the surface you’re working on! If you don’t do this, it doesn’t matter how dexterous you are or how many brushes you own, it will still look bad.

Click below for an iCiNG exclusive video on skincare — I go through my skincare routine & explain how it works, & I’m followed up by Siân of Lush Cosmetics talking about some products for men. (If you’re reading this in an RSS reader, you will need to come through to my website to see the video!)

Here are the key points to remember:

Assess your skin type. If you’re not sure, you can use the following chart. The amount of ticks you get in each row indicates how likely it is that you are that skin type.

Once you know your skin type, you can go on a crusade to find the best products for your face. One thing I learned from managing a Lush Cosmetics store for so long is that when you ask most people what their skin type is, they will reply “sensitive”. About 8/10 people do this. The fact is, your skin actually isn’t that sensitive — it’s just that most skincare products are saturated with alcohol & chemicals! No wonder you’re in pain, red & blotchy or exploding like fireworks!

A basic skincare routine consists of a cleanser, a toner & a moisturiser. Depending on your needs, you might want to spring for a neck cream & an eye cream too. An eye cream is important because the skin around your eyes is far more delicate than anywhere else on your body, & once you start to get wrinkles there, reversing them is a lot of work. A neck cream is a good idea primarily because it is one of the first places to show age, along with the back of your hands — neck cream & sunscreen on your hands are your best defence.

The cleanser’s purpose is to clean your face. You can use something gentle, or you can choose something with a bit of scrub in it. Some people alternate between both. I use Angels On Bare Skin by Lush — it gives me a gentle scrub which I use every day. The “scrubbiness” in Angels On Bare Skin comes from the ground almond they use. It’s a beautiful product, I have never met anyone who didn’t love it. It’s also good for all skin types. The best thing about it is the large amount of lavender oil used — lavender is a fantastic oil for the face as it helps to balance sebum production, meaning that if you’re too oily, it’ll dry you out a bit, & conversely, if you’re a bit dry it will give you the oil you need.

Toning is the second step in the process. It’ll remove any last traces of cleanser, get rid of excess oil & typically soften your face a bit in preparation for moisturiser. I never used to use it, but I find that my face feels much smoother & cleaner when I do.

Moisturiser is probably the most important part of your skincare routine. One common misconception is that people with oily skin shouldn’t use moisturiser — this is complete hogwash. Everyone needs a certain level of moisture for their skin to function at its best, including those of us with oily skin. Some people use a different moisturiser at night, but this is optional & something to think about later. You should avoid putting moisturiser around your eyes, as the skin there is much more delicate than anywhere else.

A lot of people don’t understand this part, especially men: Using soap on your face is not acceptable, unless it is made specifically for that purpose! Body soap is typically made of quite harsh ingredients & after a few years, it will show! Put the soap down or I will come bursting into your bathroom in a rage!

Your best weapon in terms of divining a routine is to consult with knowledgeable salespeople. You can go to a department store & tour around the counters, or you could try The Body Shop, L’Occitane, Origins or Lush. I am a huge Lush advocate because when I worked there, I really saw the products work miracles on people… but it is entirely up to you. For men, there are some companies which do specific men’s ranges like Nivea, Clinique, etc. Walk around the counters, talk to the staff, get their opinion. Be prepared to spend some time asking questions & listening to what they have to say. If you can, take as many samples as they offer. Otherwise you could arrive home with hundreds of dollars worth of product that is completely wrong for you.

When you start using products on your skin, observe how your skin behaves for three weeks. Sometimes what you’re using just doesn’t agree with you, & it can take up to three weeks for it to show. I received some make-up remover from Napoleon Perdis for Christmas, & was happily using it for a couple of weeks, when all of a sudden, my skin threw a tantrum. Given the make-up remover was the only new thing in my routine, & there had been no changes in my diet or stress level, I had to stop using it. It’s a shame, because I liked it.

I hope this was helpful! Coming soon are parts two & three of this series — make-up application & choosing colours that suit your skintone. Stay tuned!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Carousel -- Week Ending 19th January 2007

[ 19 January 2007, 17:49 ]

I’m sorry this is so late, I was in the suburbs (the horror!) reviewing a service which will be featured on here very soon! It’s also a small list — as I write & learn more about fashion, I find less & less information online that is relevant, timeless or valuable. Please send me links to anything you find that you think other people would benefit from!

Peter features again (as he did last week) with a post on Inspired Male Style. It’s great to see his perspective, as he is a very stylish man himself. I have been meaning to do a post on characters who inspire me for a while, but unfortunately I watch so few movies that I don’t know whether I could do the concept any justice!

Spring 2008 Forecast from Almost Girl. If you want to know where fashion is heading, you should read this. I found it really interesting, it looks like trends might finally be heading into that “space age” look we’ve been promised for such a long time. The article contains such choice phrases as, “pushing imaginative envelope with new visions of Futurism” (made my heart skip a beat with excitement!), “technology replaces design as reason to buy” & “futuristic fabrics: metallic/reflective/reactive”. How good does that sound?! Hand me my space gun.

I skimmed the thousands of updates on the fashion at the Golden Globes with very little interest, but I am miffed that Cameron Diaz was so harshly derided. I thought her dress was by far the most interesting of the bunch, & even though I don’t care much for her, the new dark locks are beautiful.

Beauty Snob has just started up in the last few days or so. Realistic reviews in an easy-to-read style. Good work ladies!

& finally, another article for men! Sneakers for Starters is your introduction to the world of pseudo-athletic footwear. Here’s how to tell a “good-ugly” from a “bad-ugly”, learn your classics & where to begin if you’re interested in collecting.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Daily Outfit -- 18th January 2007

[ 18 January 2007, 01:43 ]

Daily Outfit, 18th January 2007.

Long black thin cotton knit hoodie by Laurie Foon
“Death of the Bunny Girl” t-shirt from Topshop, which I wear all too often
Spiderman boy undies
2 different PVC shoes

This is my I’m-a-slacker-&-I’m-not-planning-on-leaving-the-house-today outfit. Though I might go out & get some coffee soon. The underpants aren’t mine. I have been eyeing them up for a long time, but could never find anything to coordinate them with since they’re so visually busy. Most frustrating! Anyway, I finally realised that something with a bit of length in a solid colour was my best bet, & lo & behold! — it worked.

Apparently some of you want to see my haircut… so here it is. I am still trying to work out how to style it. It’s so short! My initial panic is over. I no longer feel like a boy — instead I feel like Twiggy without the eyelashes, gamine & strangely grown-up. I have no emo combover to hide behind for the first time in years! I guess it was time to move on.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

How To Choose A Flattering Haircut

[ 18 January 2007, 00:44 ]

I recently received an email from my friend who is getting her hair cut tomorrow afternoon & wanted to know how to choose a good haircut. She said:

It might follow on from your recent mention of your own haircut…

The best part about all of this is that I didn’t follow many of the below steps. My friend is doing training at the Biba Academy here in Melbourne, & they were being supervised by a guy from the Vidal Sassoon training school in London. The haircut was offered to me for free, & since I wanted to be helpful (& felt like I needed a bit of a shake up), I went in with no reservations & told them they could do as they pleased. I figured that even if it turned out hideously, I could write about it on here & if worst came to worst, well, I have a great collection of head-scarves!

Well, I had my hair cut yesterday & I am still dealing with mon nouveau visage. It was strange — when I was in the salon, I really liked what they were doing, but as soon as I got home I decided I looked like a boy. Looking in the mirror is a shock. At the moment I am kind of brushing it to the side, like I used to, but I think as I become more comfortable with the haircut I’ll start wearing it the way it’s supposed to be. I haven’t changed my hairstyle in a really long time, so this is taking some adjusting, but I think this sort of thing is good for the constitution… yessir.

With this in mind, here are the things I think are most important in terms of getting a haircut.

Either know what you want, or shut up.
Oh, I know, I’m so mean. Basically what I’m trying to say is that you either have a good idea of what you want as an end result, or you listen to your hairdresser & take their advice. I suggest having a little faith & crossing your fingers, it’s always more exciting that way — but if you want something specific be sure to COMMUNICATE WELL.

Develop a relationship with your hairdresser.
No, that doesn’t mean taking them home to your mother! Your most valuable asset in getting a good haircut is having a stylist whose opinion you trust. You will probably need to shop around until you find someone you really like. The most expensive hairdresser is not necessarily the best, either. A great hairdresser should make you feel at ease, make suggestions, listen to your opinion & have a good haircut themselves! You wouldn’t take financial advice from someone who was broke, would you? Same applies here.

Think about your lifestyle & what the climate is like where you live.
In the mornings, do you like to fiddle with products, straighteners, spray-in conditioners or do you like to just get up & go? Are you active? Do you go swimming a lot? (If so, I would advise against going platinum blonde!) Is the humidity likely to make your hair go limp? Is the wind going to blow it out of shape? Is your working environment conservative or relaxed? Do you often wear hats or head-scarves? Do you drive a convertible? All of these things will have an impact on what kind of hairstyle is going to work for you.

Consider your hair texture.
Is your hair straight, curly or wavy? If your hair kinks into ringlets, you’re never going to have a sleek bob. Similarly, if your hair is straight & you would like to look “Botticelli-esque” (did anyone catch the Sex & The City reference?), you’re going to have a hard time.

Remember that you’re not going to look like Jennifer Aniston even if you get the “Rachel”.
(Though, dear god, why you’d want to is beyond me.) Okay, so that’s a very 90’s reference, but you get my point, right? Celebrity haircuts are not going to change your face. Also, a lot of those haircuts require HOURS of styling. Hairstyle magazines always used to trap me, because I would look at the hot model & forget about the hair. Don’t fall for that. Cover their face with your fingers if you have to. Stay focussed!

Be open-minded.
Your hairdresser probably knows what he or she is doing. If you have a weird fly-away that has always existed, you should let them know, but ultimately, they’re the one with the training. Some of the worst haircuts happen when you agree with your hairdresser but then put limitations on what they can do halfway through — so the creative vision isn’t entirely realised, & you end up with a drastically asymmetric cut at the back & a conservative fringe/bangs, for example.

Having said that… speak your mind.
If you don’t like what they’ve done, or they haven’t done what they said they would, you don’t have to pay — or they should at least fix it up for free.

Work out your face shape.
This is a crucial step, as it will make the difference between something that makes you look horsey, bloated or gorgeous.

Here’s how to work out your face shape:

There are a few ways, so I’ll let you take your pick. The first is to tie (or hold) your hair back off your face, look in a mirror, & try to figure it out. The second is to outline the shape of your face in lipstick (or a whiteboard pen) on a mirror. The third is to use maths (not my bag, but maybe it’s yours). Here’s how you do it. Get a tape measure & measure across the top of your cheekbones, across your jaw from widest point to widest point, across the widest part of your forehead & from the tip of your hairline to the bottom of your chin. Write down the measurements, then compare them. If your face is oval, the length will be equal to one & a half times the width. If you’re round-faced, your face is pretty much as wide as it is long. Oblong, your face is longer than it is wide. Heart-shaped faces are narrow at the jaw & wide at the cheekbones or forehead. If your face is square it will be about as wide as it is long — like a round face, but you should be able to see the squareness in your face pretty easily. If you have a diamond-shaped face, it will be widest at the cheekbones with a narrow forehead & jaw which measure about the same.

Please excuse the celebrity pictures, it’s just the easiest way to show different haircuts on the same face shape!

Oval faces:
Women: Most hairstyles are going to look good on you, so be happy! Short cuts look as good on you as medium-length or long hair. One thing you should avoid is a heavy fringe/bangs. There are a lot of celebrities with your face shape — Cameron Diaz, Uma Thurman, Julia Roberts, Tyra Banks (though her forehead is FIERCE), & Elle Macpherson.
Men: As above, most hairstyles are going to suit you very well. Experiment! Short hairstyles will be great on you, & you can get away with longer hair too. Just be sure to keep it in good condition (regular haircuts & a good conditioner will work wonders). Other people with your face shape include Shaquille O’Neal & Kid Rock.

Oblong or square faces:
Women: You should go for short or medium styles, to balance the length of your long face. A lot of hair at the side of your face will suit you. A soft fringe or bangs will shorten the length of your face too. If you wear your hair too long, you risk looking horsey, so keep it above shoulder-length for best results. These celebrities have oblong faces — Gwyneth Paltrow, Janet Jackson, Sarah Jessica Parker, Giselle Bundchen.
Men: If you have a square face, you will look best with a style that enhances your face shape. A faux-hawk will really suit you, or anything short with a flat top or messy kind of look. Look at pictures of Nick Lachey, Enrique Iglesias & Matt Damon for inspiration.

Round faces:
Women: Try a style with a lot of volume on the top of your head, an off-centre part or anything longer than chin-length. Fullness on the crown with the rest of your hair cut in close to the sides of your face will make your face appear longer & thinner. You should stay away from anything chin-length & rounded, as you’ll look like you’re wearing a helmet. Also avoid a straight fringe or bangs. Not flattering! See Kate Bosworth, Kirsten Dunst, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Drew Barrymore & Christina Ricci for ideas.
Men: Your goal is to make your face look slimmer & longer. This can be achieved by an off-centre part or curls at eye-level. You can also try styling your facial hair to balance out your shape. If your hairline is receding, longer hair in the back will help off-set this. Stevie Wonder pulls this off well.

Heart faces:
Women: Go for chin-length or longer styles. A bob that ends at your chin will make your face look more equally proportioned. You should try something that emphasises your cheekbones — a dramatic pixie cut will look great on you. You shouldn’t go for something with a lot of height at the crown of your head. These gals have heart-shaped faces too: Katie Holmes, Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Lopez & Reese Witherspoon.
Men: don’t usually have heart-shaped faces. Next!

Diamond faces:
Women: Almost everything works for you. Try not to wear too much hair on your face, as you probably have super features. Other women with your face shape include the glamourous Katharine Hepburn, Linda Evangelista & Sophia Loren.
Men: You’ll look best with a deep, full fringe/bangs. It will soften the appearance of your forehead. If your beard is trimmed into a rounded or square shape this can also help de-emphasise your chin.

What now?
The above information should give you a guide as to what suits your face. Now is the time to do some research. Check out the links below & if you can, go & pick up some hairstyle magazines. Bookmark the ones you like & take them to your hairdresser. If you’re not sure about the salon, most places will do a free consultation, & this will give you a good indication as to their competence. When you make your appointment, be sure to clearly communicate any concerns. Another tip: when they’re styling your hair at the end, ask them for tips on how you can replicate it at home.

Extra For Experts:

Mad Rad Hair on Livejournal. On the info page are links to photobucket accounts full of pictures of people with great hair.

Best & Worst Haircuts for oval face shapes at about.com

“Virtual Hairstyle” at UK Hairdressers

Hairstyle Gallery for men & women

Love letters & feather headdresses,

The Ultimate Guide To Unnatural Hair Colouring

[ 17 January 2007, 11:36 ]

My hair has been pink, purple, jade-green, red, black & white… & all within the last three years. I’m often asked how do I get my hair so (insert-colour-here) & what products I use, so I thought I would give you some pointers. (Also, yesterday I got my hair cut REALLY SHORT & I am still coping with the SHOCK of looking like a BOY.)

Things to remember:

If your hair is dark to begin with, the colour won’t show. If you’re trying to go darker, it probably will show, but not as vibrantly as if you had started with a lighter colour. Think of it like using a pink pen on black paper. The pink probably won’t show up. The same goes for your tresses.

If you start with yellow-toned hair — as bleached hair has a tendency to go — remember your colour wheel. If you’re trying to go bright red, & you put that over yellow, your hair will be orange. If you put blue on yellow, your hair will turn green. To get rid of the yellowness, get it toned.

If you are going grey or have white hair, know that any colour you put on your hair is going to be REALLY bright. I once read a complaint from a woman who used L’Oreal Feria’s “Starry Night” (which is the best blue-black ever, in my opinion), but because she had some gray hairs, all the gray bits went BRIGHT blue.

For those of us with naturally dark hair (like me), the best bet in terms of lightening is to get it done professionally. Yes, this can be expensive, but they know what they’re doing. When I was trying to get my hair white, I used (on average) two packets of bleach a week on my head trying to get the colour down. I continued this charade for about a month, & my hair was still yellow & nasty. I could have bought toner myself, but I didn’t want to risk it & my hair was already way too brittle for me to want to keep fiddling with it — & I spent easily as much trying to do it at home as it cost to have it done properly. So while this CAN be done at home, I suggest getting it done at a salon unless you feel really confident, or don’t care if it looks manky.

You should always try to go for a colour that complements your skin-tone. You can use my article Fashion Help For Recovering Goths as a guideline. In general, I would suggest that if you have a ruddy complexion (by this I mean you blush or go pink in the face easily) to stay away from pink & red colours. I would also say to stay away from neon yellow or green if you’re a bit on the pale side. It will just make you look sick, & I presume that’s not what you’re going for!

Blue is hard to maintain, probably the hardest of all the colours. Keep this in mind if you want to try it — it will need a lot of touch-ups. If you want to keep it up long-term, make sure the place you bought it from has enough in stock!

Brands

Special Effects: I personally like Special Effects, & based on what I’ve heard from most people who dye their hair on a regular basis, it seems like the best dye. It comes in amazing colours — my hair is “Atomic Pink” & I would love to try “Electric Blue” sometime — but beware! It STAINS like CRAZY. My pillowcases are pink. They have been washed, but they’re still stained. Don’t use white towels! After a while, the colour stops bleeding, but generally it takes a couple of weeks. Special Effects tends to last at least a month. A lot of the colours also glow under black-light. Bonus. Please note, I have never seen Special Effects for sale outside of the U.S.A. When I went to New York recently, I stock-piled with pink. Try Ebay.

Manic Panic: I’m okay with Manic Panic. They have a good range of colours & it lasts for a reasonable length of time. Some of this also glows under black-light. Looking at their site, it says their formula has improved (“lasts 30% longer!”), so maybe they’ve improved. Anyway, a good second choice.

Fudge: Probably a good brand to start with if you’re unsure as to whether you REALLY want purple hair. Otherwise, don’t bother buddy! The colours are average at best, & in my experience, it lasts about a week tops.

I’m not going to cover the bleaching stage, since I believe it should be done professionally & if you really want to do it, you can read the directions. I can’t give you any better advice than what is written on the box, unfortunately!

You will need:

Rubber gloves

Hair dye — you can use a couple of colours if you want to experiment or want a more interesting effect. I once used the remnants of Manic Panic’s “New Rose” with Special Effects’ “Cupcake Pink” & the result was awesome.

A tinting brush (looks kind of like a turkey baster), though this isn’t essential, & you can use a soft toothbrush instead if you like.

Vaseline

Comb

Old towels

Cling film or an old shower-cap

Vinegar (apple cider is my favourite). Edit: A reader tells me that vinegar stripped the colour right out of her blue hair, so perform this step at your own risk!

Step by step (ooh baby, gonna get to ya giii-iiii-iiirl)
Don’t tell me you didn’t like New Kids On The Block. I know the truth!

01. Okay blondie, wash your hair with shampoo, rinse it out, get out of the shower & towel-dry your hair. Don’t dry it completely, just get most of the moisture out.

02. Put down towels, put on an old t-shirt & read the directions on the bottle to find out the recommend length of time you should leave it in.

03. Rubber gloves please! Apply a thick streak of vaseline across your skin where it meets your hairline. This will stop your skin from going whatever weird colour your hair will soon be. You crazy kid! Put some around your ears too, since blue ears look silly.

04. If you’re using more than one colour, mix it up in a bowl that you never plan on eating from again. You can use the tinting brush for this or you can just use a couple of gloved fingers. Once you’ve stirred it well & are happy with the colour, you’re ready to go!

05. Apply the dye! Use the tinting brush, a toothbrush or your fingers. I use my fingers. Some people say you should colour from back to front, but in my experience this doesn’t make much of a difference. Being able to see the back of your head might be a good thing though — I usually get a chair & prop a full-length mirror on it so I can.

06. Make sure your hair is totally coloured. Comb it through & check that you’ve done the roots entirely. I usually like so much dye in my hair that I can easily twist it into weird shapes.

07. Cover your head with cling film (or a shower-cap). This locks in the heat coming out of your scalp, & helps set the colour better. You can leave this for as long as you want — I usually leave the colour in a little longer than the bottle says (if they say 30 minutes, I leave it 45), but I once knew a guy who would go to bed with cling-film covering his blue hair. Also around now you might like to pour some vinegar into a cup. Fill it up, you’re going to be rinsing your hair with this.

08. Wash it out! Get in the shower & rinse it until the water goes clear (or as clear as it’s going to get). Then shampoo. Tilt your head back & try not to let any of the water coming off your hair trickle down your face, since it can stain! Okay, now for the vinegar. This works best for me when I sit down. Keep your head back & pour the vinegar through, working it through with your fingers. I don’t really know how it works, apparently it raises the pH level of the hair colour, but whatever. The point is that it works — it will stop your hair from staining everything as much. Rinse well, then condition.

09. Get out of the shower, towel dry & admire for at least ten minutes before putting your clothes back on. Yay! Enjoy!

Maintenance

To keep the colour bright & vibrant, & to stop your hair from drying out, you need to use a really good conditioner. I am a huge fan of “Dumb Blonde” from Tigi’s Bedhead range. Here’s their blurb: “Not just for dumb blondes — it’s for racy redheads & buxom brunettes too. Dumb Blonde shampoo delivers mega-moisture, explodes with lather & adds supershine.” The conditioner (they call it a “reconstructor”) is full o’ protein, with soy, wheat, keratin & pro-vitamin B5. They usually sell small bottles (maybe 275ml, I’m not sure) of each for about $16 US, but every so often you will find a litre pump bottle of the conditioner & shampoo together for $30 US. If you come across this, snap it up! It’s a great saving & the products are wonderful.

Of course, you don’t have to use Dumb Blonde, it’s just something I have found which works for me.

If your hair is white, buy a purple shampoo of some kind to keep it toned. I used to use “Daddy-O” by Lush, but it’s been discontinued. Boo!

Send me pictures!

Extra For Experts:

Video of Halcyon Styn dying his hair pink.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Marie Antoinette Style

[ 17 January 2007, 07:30 ]

Let them eat cake! I recently saw Sofia Coppola’s Marie Antoinette & really enjoyed it. Normally I loathe period films, & Kirsten Dunst doesn’t do much for me much either, but this was a complete visual thrill. The clothing was as amazing as the colour-scheme & the cakes were incredible. Anyway, I really liked the styling, so thought I would give you a quick guide on how to doll yourself up like Marie Antoinette.

Hair

White puffy hair can happen. My natural hair colour is practically black & I had white hair for at least two years. (When I say white, I mean white.) It just requires devotion, money, & a resignation to the knowledge that your hair will, at some point, break. My hair requires two separate lots of bleach & a fair amount of toner to get that white. I would suggest you stump up the money & get it done at a salon (it usually cost me somewhere in the region of $260 NZ). I think the money you pay is totally worth it, I really loved the way it looked. The other thing is, it was so damaged that I could do anything I wanted with it. Usually I would back-comb it & use some talcum powder (Candy Fluff by Lush — it has sparkles & smells like pink) to keep it in place. No hairspray required! Looked good crimped, too.

However, if you would rather do the look on a temporary basis, these are the real deal — big, white, & ridiculous Marie Antoinette wigs. I personally am keen on the “Marie Antoinette Wig w/ Pearls” & the “Madame de Pompadour”. I love big hair! It’s one of my favourite things!

You could also try the Club Kid over-sized crimped wig. It comes in pink, purple & auburn. Not strictly Marie Antoinette style, but incredibly cool & it would definitely work with the look.

Remember that Marie Antoinette liked things in her hair. Sequined butterflies, feathered butterflies, a crystal flower, or a crystal & pearl hair comb would be perfect. A tiara, feathers, or a daisy-chain would be a nice touch too.

Face

Use a pale foundation as a base, to smooth out your face. Use a light pink blush on the apples of your cheeks, like MAC Cosmetics Powder Blush in Dollymix, which is a shade of pure candy pink. Then use a pale powder to set your face — MAC Cosmetics Iridescent Powder in “Delicacy” is described as pink sweetened with silver icing & sounds incredible.

Decorate the eyes with eyeliner jewels along your top lid, dot single jewels around the corners of your eyes, & wear a lovely fluttery pair of false eyelashes to finish. My Diva’s Closet has an incredible range — pink with purple, black feathered, spiked with rhinestones… actually, I’m quite pleased with a lot of the things I found there, & the prices are very reasonable.

If you can find a packet of stick-on beauty spots (I couldn’t find any online, what is the world coming to?) I suggest you invest in those. If not, just draw one on. A dot is relatively easy, a is a bit trickier, but in this case, a steady hand coupled with liquid eyeliner & a good brush are your best friends.

For the lips, go for a stain rather than a solid colour. You want to look flushed rather than gaudy. Try Napoleon Perdis’ Satin Lips gloss lipstick in Christiana, Lucinda or Angelene.

Les Autres

Marie Antoinette introduced the concept of regular bathing to the cheese-scented denizens of pre-revolutionary France, & was also well-known for the beautiful scents which surrounded her. Her favourite smells were tuberose, violet, & lavender. To replicate this, try “Marie“ perfume by Black Phoenix Alchemy Lab: A blend of sinuous violet and elegant tea rose: the chosen scent of France’s Demigoddess of Debauch. It sounds delicious & gets excellent reviews.

I also suggest a liberal dousing of glitter — that link has basically every type of glitter you could ever need. Loose, spray-on, liquid… put it in your hair, across your cheekbones & décolletage.

These are all just suggestions — you don’t need to do all of them at once, but feel free to take aspects from it. I would suggest doing it without the frilly dresses, since that’s just a little bit too much! Enjoy, but be sure to hold onto your head. Wink wink.

Extra For Experts:

The Costumer’s Guide has a lot of information on the dresses worn in Marie Antoinette.

What Marie Antoinette Really Wore, Slate Magazine.

Love letters & feather headdresses,

The New Eyebrow

[ 14 January 2007, 12:49 ]

As you know, I am not the greatest trend follower, but I am delighted to report that the strong eyebrow is “in”! I have always been a fan of this look (as my own eyebrows will testify) & I’m very happy that I will be seeing more of it on the street. If eyes are the window to the soul, your eyebrows are the window-frame, & when done well, can completely alter your bone structure. This is NOT gender specific — EVERYONE should keep their eyebrows tidy.

It’s not necessary for all men to shape their brows, but there are some things that should go. A monobrow, for example — nobody in the course of history has managed to pull this off successfully, & I’m sorry to say that you aren’t any different. Wax it! Another thing that can be helpful for men with slightly unruly brows is a little bit of eyebrow gel. I know, it sounds silly, but it will stop them being blown around or looking like part of a crop circle if the wind catches them the wrong way. Try this in the mornings.

You can use Adrien Brody as a role-model if you’re a guy, or Elizabeth Taylor & Ava Gardner if you’re a woman. All of these people have great eyebrows. If you cover their eyebrows with a finger, it completely changes their beauty. Take note!

Of course, just because “big” is in, it’s not as easy as throwing caution to the wind & letting your malnutritioned ‘brows grow out in a feral manner — & if you’ve never touched yours, that doesn’t mean you can just leave them as is.

For people new to the world of eyebrow grooming, I suggest visiting a beautician. Even if you’re a man! Don’t be embarrassed, other men are doing this all the time. Beauticians know what they’re doing, even if you think they don’t. When I was about 16, my mother booked me in to get my eyebrows waxed. I was terrified that I was going to end up with what I called “sperm eyebrows” — eyebrows which look like a round nubbin of hair by the nose that then trails off to a tiny tail on the other side of your eye. The style was prevalent at my school. I did my best to explain my concerns, but it was probably unnecessary — I walked out of there with great-looking eyebrows. Once you’ve had your eyebrows waxed once & you like the shape, you can then just tweeze the errant hairs that grow back — very little fuss!

The best eyebrows have a nice arch in the middle — straight eyebrows are a little dull & don’t frame the eye as well.

Things to remember:

Stick to your natural brow line, which is where the bone arches above your eye. If you go too high above this, you will look permanently surprised, which isn’t such a good look.

Only wax the parts that you are never going to need, such as between the brows & along the temples. If you wax underneath the eyebrow, which is where you’ll do most of your maintenance, you will find that after years of doing this, your eyebrows will stop growing back. They will look sparse & nasty, they will grow at weird angles & stick straight out. You will have to resort to drawing on your eyebrows every morning!

You should avoid drawing on your eyebrows unless they are so fine & thin that they basically disappear. There is no way they can compete with beautifully-shaped, natural brows.

Make sure the start & end of your eyebrow lay along the same horizontal line on your face. Otherwise your eyebrow will look kind of off-balance & wonky.

Use slanted tweezers, it will make your life much easier.

Pull the hair in the same direction it grows, this will make it less painful. Another way to reduce the pain factor is to tweeze after you get out of the shower.

Most experts say you should never tweeze above the eyebrow, but Kevyn Aucoin disagreed with them — & he was one of the most well-paid make-up artists ever. I have never done any damage by doing a little selective tweezing above the eyebrow. However, if you’re unsure, keep it to a minimum or just don’t do it!

If you’re trying to grow out thin eyebrows, buy eyebrow shadow a couple of shades lighter than your colour, & fill in what you lack. Elke Von Freudenberg suggests taking a small toothbrush & using that to apply the shadow to the skin underneath the eyebrow too — she says it lasts longer. (All stuff I didn’t know, since my eyebrows are plentiful enough to not need to be filled in!) She also recommends trying a little loose glitter across your eyebrows for a night out! Sounds great. I’m definitely going to try that with some midnight-blue coloured glitter.

Extra For Experts:

Kevyn Aucoin eyebrow tutorial — this made my jaw drop as I read down, the difference to his sister’s face from shaping her eyebrow alone is incredible.

Elke Von Freudenberg, a celebrity make-up artist has a podcast here where she shares tips on a new way of doing the smoky eye to help play up strong eyebrows!

Love letters & feather headdresses,

Kissable lips

[ 22 December 2006, 00:11 ]

Kissing is one of my favourite activities. I have spent serious time investigating products & tricks to make it better! Seriously! Other than brushing twice a day, using teeth whitening treatments & flossing, it’s all in the lips.

Lipstick? Gloss? Balm? Help!

Lip balm is essentially moisturiser for the lips — though the composition is different to your facial moisturiser because the skin on your lips has no sweat or sebaceous glands. This means that it doesn’t generate sweat or other body oils, which is what keeps the rest of the skin on your body soft & supple. This is the reason lips tend to need a little help when it comes to moisture. A good lip balm is one of the most important tools in your make-up stash. It’s best to get one with some SPF to help protect your mouth from the sun, especially in summer, while ski-ing, or any time you’re in the Southern hemisphere (something about no ozone layer).
If your lips are totally dry & cracked, go for a medicated balm (I dig Blistex). Another thing to consider is whether you’re drinking enough water, since dehydration shows in the skin.

Lip gloss & lipstick are both purely cosmetic & used to add colour, shine, flavour or glitter to the lips. Lip gloss is often seen as a gateway cosmetic for young girls, while lipstick comes from sleazier origins. There seems to be some debate between whether it was first initially used to imitate the flush of sexual arousal or to make the mouth look more like a vagina, though it was definitely used by prostitutes. Kind of amusing that something with such a salacious history is now used by most corporate women. These days a lot of women feel naked without lipstick, but even if you don’t wear it regularly, it’s a nice finishing touch if you’re going out for a special occasion.

There are a few tricks to wearing lipstick, but I will tell you that if you think your lips look thin usually, you should avoid using dark colour on them. Dark colours make things look smaller (which is why black trousers are so popular), so it’s only going to serve to minimise your lips. If you want to wear lipstick, go for almost-nude or pink. Leave the blood-reds & other vampish shades to the Angelina Jolie types!

So, you’re embarking on an adventure which may involve some kissing. Should you wear lipstick, lip gloss or lip balm?
I say: go for the balm & touch up with lip-gloss whenever you feel like you need it. Lipstick presents problems because:
a) if you’re kissing a boy, he is probably not going to want red lips (unless he is exceptionally open-minded) &
b) if you’re kissing a girl, she probably already has her own colour on & doesn’t need your contribution!
Plus, that messy Courtney Love-with-her-lipstick-all-smeared-off look died a much-needed death a few years ago. Celebrate it!

If you feel like your lips look thin & your pout is missing something without lipstick on, try a lip plumper like DuWop’s Lip Venom. Lip Venom is a gloss containing the spicy oils of cinnamon & ginger which works to plump up your lips & enhances the natural colour. Though it seems kind of weird & barbaric, it’s a very effective weapon in kissing warfare — it is very alluring! The story goes that it was created on the set of Felicity to “mimic the same effect as kissing”, so if you want to look as if you were born to make out, you should give this a try.

In my experience, here are the best ways to prep your lips for a good make-out session.

Scrub — You can go the DIY route by mixing a little sugar with water & rubbing it on your lips, or sprinkling some sugar on top of lip gloss, then brushing it back & forth. Remember to rinse it off! If you have a thing for little pots & specialty products, you could try The Lip Scrub by Sara Happ. The name isn’t so original but at least you know what it does, & it appears to get rave reviews all over the internet. It comes in a variety of flavours (almond creme, peppermint, vanilla bean, brown sugar, cinnamon sugar & cocoa) & apparently it is gentle enough that you can lick it off & it won’t kill you. Awesome. Another way of exfoliating your lips is to use an old soft toothbrush or a damp washcloth to do the same thing.

Lip balm — I like to let my lip balm sink in for a few minutes before doing anything else. In my experiments thus far, The Body Shop’s Cocoa Butter Lip Care Stick (about $5 US) is my shining star. It goes on very smoothly, it smells delicious & it moisturises like nobody’s business.

Lip gloss — Once your lips feel soft & supple, apply some kind of gloss. Your mileage may vary in this department, since people like different levels of shine, flavour & wear. If you’re not sure where to start, Sephora has an amazing selection of glosses which can be sorted by popularity. philosophy does some delicious ones, such as powered sugar cookie, double rich hot cocoa, sugarplum fairy & vanilla birthday cake. I also hear good things about Lancome’s Juicy Tubes, though I haven’t tried them since super-shiny ain’t my bag. My personal favourites are Bloom Cosmetics’ Sweet Pea Lip Gloss, Smackers’ Lip Frosting in Birthday, Perfumeria Gal Violette, The Body Shop’s Cranberry Shimmer Lip Balm & Strawberry Born Lippy Lip Balm. These come recommended because they’re not too shiny, they taste good & they apply smoothly. I love the look of MAC’s Lipglass range, but unfortunately they are gloopy & make kissing messy. However, having said that, I have far more tubes of various lip gloss than I know what to do with. I bought something ridiculous like a 24-pack of Lip Smackers a couple of years ago & have yet to finish even ONE of them. Tragic!

One thing to keep in mind if you’re shopping for lip products is that you should NEVER apply anything from a tester to your mouth. At MAC Cosmetics I know that their lip gloss testers are without applicators, & they will give you a new one if you want to try something out, but even the idea of that gives me the heebie jeebies. People double-dip, you know! Personally I am not willing to risk contracting a cold-sore because I wanted to be sure I loved my purchase. The best thing about lip gloss is that it tends to be cheap, so if you buy a few you don’t like that much, it’s not a huge fiscal nightmare.

Experiment & enjoy! You might end up mixing a few different types & find something you really love, but of course, applying a lush coat to your mouth & then asking someone cute how it tastes is a good way of garnering information too!

Love letters & feather headdresses,