How Do You Embrace & Celebrate Your Body?
[ 2 March 2010, 14:33 ]
Last Wednesday, I sent out a little Twitter broadcast.
& here’s what came back.
@Susantrax dancing in my underwear
@thelinus belly dancing! it makes me like my stomach, makes me feel sexy and healthy!
@juliettemaxwell I kiss my shoulder without noticing, as if to say Thanks, love ya.
@posbleak Spend some time marveling at the things it can do and how the smallest changes can improve those abilities! Also, reading about how our biochemistry acts on our feelings – it’s eye-opening and creates new self-awareness.
@CMYKaboom I celebrate my body by reminding myself that throughout the history of existence, no creature has existed that embodies my form
@shessomickey By looking at F*ckYeahChubbyGirls on Tumblr! & dressing in beautiful clothing that fits & pleases me. I dress to feel beautiful. Being beautiful comes naturally after that. Also stretching and yoga. I love feeling good in my body, limber and vigorous and powerful. Stretching in the morning =
@luismuybien Though I’m thin and not the muscular type, I’ve learned to just focus on being healthy for now. I’ll eventually be fit.
@hachikoxbb wearing things that accentuate my favorite body parts, letting myself have adequate rest, lots of “self-love”, & yoga! xo : )
@raachyyy by wearing dresses every day, theyre so much nicer than jeans, they’re so much girlier and allow me to feel good about myself
@staygo1dkid Cute dresses! High heels! Colored tights! Nothing is better than a dress that fits perfectly with high heels to accent it.
@dollypink I’m a burlesque performer and I celebrate my body by shimmying my boobs!
@kitty_polaca i used to do belly dance to learn to LOVE my body & really helped me. i praise this lil temple of mine :) #radicalselflove
@British_Style By wearing things I like, not things people say I should like, and by just walking round my room in heels when I feel down :)
@lydiahudgens i feed it well, exercise on the daily, embrace it with creams & masks & the occasional massage & celebrate it with clothes. i fashion photography because of i love celebrating the power of femininity, of the way the body moves.. each body is beautiful & photography allows you to bring out little separate details that truly celebrate the individual. PS: this quote (“We are becoming the men we wanted to marry”) is the realization of the modern feminist I think. superb.
@SugarKinesis I celebrate my body by trying to do the best I can for it, from exercise to eating right to pampering to sleeping well…. ...even though I’m not perfect at it, it then rewards me and shows appreciation by making me look and feel better. It’s the.. ...only one I have, so I want to treat it with respect! (sorry for the 3-part answer!)
@idance_iwrite idance! in class, in clubs, in my kitch. u get the picture.
@trendology w/ a stretch every morning, cupcakes, private clothing optional 90s dance parties, & toasts – cheers to my constant companion!
@asil I do yoga bcos it’s nice to know small differences my body can make each day. Every practice is just like “a date” with my body
@denoo ...how do i em&cel my bod? by loving the fact that im woman: soft, delicious, supple, delish, warm & flawed… you can never celebrate another persons body unless you can celebrate yours first… but honestly why do i have to go an extra step to em&cel me? i love my yellow teeth, my bad skin, my flat bum, my hair. i’m me #radicalselflove
@ErinKys No longer being afraid of wearing clothes I love despite media telling us fatties aren’t ‘deserving’ of great fashion!
@flowermash I go some days w/o makeup to remain comfortable in my own skin. I dress in a way that flatters & inspires me. others: Emphasize specifically what I adore about them. Compliments are so life giving! #radicalselflove
@jujutreasures I think that art and photography are great ways to celebrate and appreciate other people’s bodies (as well as your own)
@glassofwin I embrace & celebrate my body by respecting it & not poisoning it with toxic foods/chemicals & staying as healthy as I can
@alihalsaba I embrace & celebrate my body through dance… every class I take I am amazed at the things it can do!
@hachikoxbb wearing things that accentuate my favorite body parts, adequate rest, lots of “self-love”, & yoga! xo : ) #radicalselflove
@katelanfoisy My body is a map of those who came before me. Every freckle, scar or bump was a hand me down from the past. The way I hold a cup or touch my cheek as I am laughing are traits passed down from my ancestors. That’s how I embrace and celebrate mine.
@colene1985 I celebrate my own by trying on my whole wardrobe when I’m not going anywhere!!! ...
@Ellie_Di Strangely enough, I feel most in love with my body when I’m nekkid. Everything where it should be; just me as I am.
@blferguson134 I used to hate the way I looked, but thankfully, I have a great friend who helped me learn to accept my body. I love it now!
@konekochan88 I celebrate my body by what I put on it. Love clothing and piercings! #radicalselflove
@Emilybakescakes Wearing (only) sexy underwear around the house even when no one else can see me. #radicalselflove
@url_elf I don’t dress from insecurity. We don’t have to wear certain things to look thin to be acceptable or confident. I embrace others for who they are, not how they look. I don’t deride ppl for having a look different than mine #radicalselflove
@LadyMonstrous #radicalselflove I celebrate my body w/ martial arts kata and stretching. Nothing like consciously using it to feel its value!
@astrasmagic I look at Goddess symbols & remind myself that my own religion sees pear-shaped women as divine
@alorelle I embrace my body by loving it. I masturbate, I use Lush products, I stare at myself in the mirror like Narcissus. No shame
@seakisst I like to wear fabulously sexy lingerie under my everyday clothes, provide my body with healthy, tasty food and sleep!
“Outward beauty is an easy thing to become obsessed with in our society. I haven’t always had an inner confidence. I haven’t always looked at my reflection & loved it, because there was always something I wanted to fix, because someone always looked better. This journey was about finding something that was beautiful inside of me & knowing that I own it. & it’s unique & rare.” — Jessica Simpson
“I think sometimes what happens is that all of this feeling out of control manifests itself in trying to control your body; whether it’s an eating disorder or talking about getting your nose fixed, as if that’s going to be the solution to all the pressure.” — Susan Sarandon
So, tell us! How do you celebrate & embrace your body? What’s your favourite way to get down with your own divine deliciousness?
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the playgirls guide to radical self love Add Gala on Twitter!
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Witch Baby
[ 16 February 2010, 10:14 ]
“My pain is ugly, Angel Juan. I feel like I have so much ugly pain”, says Witch Baby in a dream.“Everyone does”, Angel Juan says. “My mother says that pain is hidden in everyone you see. She says try to imagine it like big bunches of flowers that everyone is carrying around with them. Think of your pain like a big bunch of red roses, a beautiful thorn necklace. Everyone has one.”
From Witch Baby by Francesca Lia Block.
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the playgirls guide to radical self love Add Gala on Twitter!I'm So Mad With Love...
[ 13 February 2010, 09:37 ]
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the playgirls guide to radical self love Add Gala on Twitter!Cherry On Top
[ 7 February 2010, 07:58 ]
Charles Bukowski.
drinking champagne and
driving a BMW
and also married to a
socialite from
Philadelphia’s Main Line
which of course is going to prevent me
from writing my earthy
and grubby stuff.
and they might be
right,
I could be getting to be
more like them,
and that’s as close to
death as you can
get.
we’ll see.
but don’t bury me yet.
don’t worry if I drink with
Sean Penn.
just measure the poems
as they come off the
keyboard.
listen only to them.
after this long fight
I have no intention of
quitting short.
or late.
or satisfied.
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Cherry On Top
[ 24 January 2010, 10:06 ]
“No man is great enough or wise enough for any of us to surrender our destiny to. The only way in which anyone can lead us is to restore to us the belief in our own guidance.” — Henry Miller
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Cherry On Top
[ 17 January 2010, 09:40 ]
So I have decided to kick off this new feature called Cherry On Top, which will happen on Sundays. (Get it? Sundaes? Hur hur!) It could be anything, a picture, a video, whatever, but usually it will be something that I think stands on its own & doesn’t require my commentary. I find so much rad stuff online that deserves to be shared! I don’t usually post on Sunday, so look at it like a fun bonus! Anyway, I hope you enjoy, & that this new feature inspires, excites, confuses, provokes conversation, amazes or bewilders you… Whatever you like! Here’s the first one…
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!John Lennon
[ 8 December 2009, 10:40 ]
John Lennon was an incredible musician, writer & peace activist who is most well-known for his work with The Beatles.
Today marks 29 years since the day John Lennon was shot & killed outside his apartment in Manhattan. He had signed a copy of his latest album for his killer just a few hours beforehand. Years earlier, when asked in an interview how he thought he might die, he said, “I’ll probably be popped off by some loony.”
“We’ve got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can’t just accept it & leave it in the cupboard or just think it’s going to get on by itself. You’ve got to keep watering it. You’ve got to really look after it & nurture it.”
As a child, his aunt bought him a guitar even though she had her doubts about his claims that he would be famous one day. She said, “The guitar’s all very well, John, but you’ll never make a living out of it.”
When The Beatles were just starting out, they played a 48-night tour of Germany’s strip clubs. After they employed Brian Epstein as their manager, he told them they could be really big but that they would have to stop swearing, smoking & eating chicken on stage. He also wanted to put them in suits. Lennon initially resisted but eventually relented, saying, “I’ll wear a bloody balloon if somebody’s going to pay me”.
Their popularity grew, & Beatlemania took hold of the United Kingdom, with police officers regularly using high-pressure fire hoses to control crowds of screaming fans.
“You don’t need anybody to tell you who you are or what you are. You are what you are!”
In August of 1964, The Beatles were introduced to marijuana by Bob Dylan in their hotel room in New York City, & a year later, Lennon & George Harrison were at dinner with their dentist when he spiked their coffees with LSD. The two experimented with it afterwards, with Ringo Starr & Paul McCartney joining them later. Lennon wrote “I Am The Walrus” while under the influence.
Lennon & McCartney were a legendary writing team. They usually wrote songs in hotel rooms after concerts or at one another’s homes. It took them about one or two hours to complete each one.
He caused controversy in the United States when he said, “Christianity will go. It will vanish & shrink… We’re more popular than Jesus now — I don’t know which will go first, rock & roll or Christianity.” The uproar was huge, with burnings of Beatles records & threats against Lennon’s life, & the band decided to stop touring.
Shortly afterward, he met Yoko Ono. He regarded her as a “magical being”, & said that he had never considered his chauvinistic attitudes towards women until he met her.
“You’re just left with yourself all the time, whatever you do anyway. You’ve got to get down to your own God in your own temple. It’s all down to you, mate.”
Today is also 40 years to the day since John Lennon & Yoko Ono launched their WAR IS OVER campaign. They had posters designed & posted across the world in major cities like New York, London, Tokyo, & Paris.
In a statement, he said, “This is part of our peace campaign. Our theme is that people have the power to stop things they don’t like, & wars must be the first thing.”
“If everyone demanded peace instead of another television set, then there’d be peace.”
Ways to celebrate John Lennon’s life:
Wear green (his favourite colour).
Listen to Double Fantasy, which was released only a month before he died. It won the Grammy Award for Album of the Year & is a goodie!
Download a WAR IS OVER poster in your language & set it as your desktop, photocopy it & staple it to lamp posts, stick a copy to the fridge, print it on a t-shirt, use it as your mantra, etc.
Queue up every single Beatles song you have & listen to them all day.
Eat a big bowl of cornflakes (his favourite food).
If you’re in New York City, go to the Strawberry Fields memorial in Central Park. People gather there every day on this year to sing songs & remember his life.
Hire Yellow Submarine & A Hard Day’s Night & watch them from your bed.
Play The Beatles RockBand with your best friends.
Think about how you can bring more peace & love into your life & the lives of others.
Follow Yoko Ono on Twitter.
Read memories of John, with letters, photos, postcards & more.
Look at the Imagine Peace Tower live from Reykjavik on webcam.
Spend time on (or around) a boat. Lennon’s song-writing muse came back while he sailed to Bermuda in 1980.
Watch WAR IS OVER! (below)
John Lennon didn’t invent rock & roll, nor did he embody it as toweringly as figures like Elvis Presley & Little Richard, but he did more than anyone else to shake it up, move it forward & instill it with a conscience. As the most daring & outspoken of the four Beatles, he helped shape the agenda of the Sixties – socially & politically, no less than musically. As a solo artist, he made music that alternately disturbed & soothed, provoked & sought community. As a human being, he served as an exemplar of honesty in his art & life. As Jann Wenner wrote in the foreword to a collection of writings entitled The Ballad of John & Yoko, “Of the many things that will be long remembered about John Lennon – his genius as a musician & singer, his wit & literary swiftness, his social intuition & leadership – among the most haunting was the stark, unembarrassed commitment of his life, his work & his undernourished frame to truth, to peace & to humanity.” (Source)
A BBC poll ranked Lennon as the eighth greatest Briton of all time, & Rolling Stone magazine declared him the fifth greatest singer ever.
“Yeah we all shine on, like the moon, & the stars, & the sun.”
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Everything Is Going To Be Alright
[ 7 December 2009, 09:56 ]
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quotables: Jon Krakauer
[ 30 November 2009, 10:02 ]
“Make a radical change in your lifestyle & begin to boldly do things which you may previously never have thought of doing, or been too hesitant to attempt. So many people live within unhappy circumstances & yet will not take the initiative to change their situation because they are conditioned to a life of security, conformity, & conservation, all of which may appear to give one peace of mind, but in reality nothing is more damaging to the adventurous spirit within a man than a secure future. The very basic core of a man’s living spirit is his passion for adventure. The joy of life comes from our encounters with new experiences, & hence there is no greater joy than to have an endlessly changing horizon, for each day to have a new & different sun. If you want to get more out of life, you must lose your inclination for monotonous security & adopt a helter-skelter style of life that will at first appear to you to be crazy. But once you become accustomed to such a life you will see its full meaning & its incredible beauty.” — Jon Krakauer, Into the Wild.
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!We Are God In The Chrysalis
[ 1 September 2009, 11:28 ]
“Whenever you go out of doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high, & fill the lungs to the utmost; drink in the sunshine; greet your friends with a smile, & put soul into every handclasp. Do not fear being misunderstood & do not waste a minute thinking about your enemies. Try to fix firmly in your mind what you would like to do; & then without veering off direction, you will move straight to the goal. Keep your mind on the great & splendid things you would like to do, & then, as the days go gliding by, you will find yourself unconsciously seizing upon the opportunities that are required for the fulfilment of your desire, just as the coral insect takes from the running tide the element it needs. Picture in your mind the able, earnest, useful person you desire to be, & the thought you hold is hourly transforming you into the particular individual… Thought is supreme. Preserve a right mental attitude — the attitude of courage, frankness, & good cheer. To think right is to create. All things come through desire & every sincere prayer is answered. We become like that on which our hearts are fixed. Whenever you go out of doors, draw the chin in, carry the crown of the head high. We are god in the chrysalis.” — Elbert Hubbard
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Fabulous.
[ 12 August 2009, 13:03 ]
“I’m just a bubble out of a champagne bottle!” chirps fitness guru Richard Simmons. Best known for prancing about in tank tops & short shorts, Simmons effectively counsels the obese & has produced dozens of best-selling exercise videos.
“When I wake up in the morning, it’s like the red curtain goes up… I twirl around the room. I thank God for the day. I fluff my hair & yell, ‘GO GET ‘EM, RICHARD!’”
(Source)
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!The Triumph Of Magic Over The Brute
[ 5 August 2009, 09:00 ]
Excerpts from an interview with Vladimir Nabokov (1971).
Q: What do you do to prepare yourself for the ordeals of life?
A: Shave every morning before bath and breakfast so as to be ready to fly far at short notice.
Q: What are the literary virtues you seek to attain— and how?
A: Mustering the best words, with every available lexical, associative, and rhythmic assistance, to express as closely as possible what one wants to express.
Q: What is your position in the world of letters?
A: Jolly good view from up here.
Q: What struggles these days for pride of place in your mind?
A: Meadows. A meadow with Scarce Heath butterflies in North Russia, another with Grinnell’s Blue in Southern California. That sort of thing.
Q: What are your views about man’s upward climb from slime?
A: A truly remarkable performance. Pity, though, that some of the slime still sticks to drugged brains.
Q: What kinds of power do you favor, and which do you oppose?
A: To play safe, I prefer to accept only one type of power: the power of art over trash, the triumph of magic over the brute.
Q: What are the large issues that you can’t get interested in, and what are you most concerned with?
A: The larger the issue the less it interests me. Some of my best concerns are microscopic patches of color.
...& that, my friends, is why Vladimir Nabokov has a permanent place on my list of all-time icons.
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Become; Immerse. Beauty! Become It.
[ 17 April 2009, 12:19 ]
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 27/28
[ 26 February 2009, 15:44 ]
“To be nobody-but-yourself — in a world which is doing its best, night & day, to make you everybody else — means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; & never stop fighting.” — e e cummings
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[ 25 February 2009, 15:21 ]
“Never interrupt someone doing something you said couldn’t be done.” — Amelia Earhart
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[ 24 February 2009, 14:59 ]
“It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” — Paulo Coelho
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 24/28
[ 23 February 2009, 14:57 ]
“You live like this, sheltered, in a delicate world, & you believe you are living. Then you read a book, or you take a trip, & you discover that you are not living, that you are hibernating. The symptoms of hibernating are easily detectable: first, restlessness. The second symptom (when hibernating becomes dangerous & might degenerate into death): absence of pleasure. That is all. It appears like an innocuous illness. Monotony, boredom, death. Millions live like this (or die like this) without knowing it. They work in offices. They drive a car. They picnic with their families. They raise children. & then some shock treatment takes place, a person, a book, a song, & it awakens them & saves them from death.” — Anais Nin
P.S. Today is Lightcasting Day! Get on it!
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 16/28
[ 16 February 2009, 05:30 ]
listen to the mustnts, child,
listen to the donts
listen to the shouldnts,
the impossibles,
the wonts
listen to the never haves,
then listen close to me…
anything can happen, child,
anything can be.
— Shel Silverstein.
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 15/28
[ 15 February 2009, 04:55 ]
“Make for yourself a world you can believe in. It sounds simple, I know. But it’s not. Listen, there are a million worlds you could make for yourself. Everyone you know has a completely different one — the woman in 5G, that cab driver over there, you. Sure, there are overlaps, but only in the details. Some people make their worlds around what they think reality is like. They convince themselves that they had nothing to do with their worlds’ creations & continuations. Some make their worlds without knowing it. Their universes are just sesame seeds & three-day weekends & dial tones & skinned knees & physics & driftwood & emerald earrings & books dropped in bathtubs & holes in guitars & plastic & empathy & hardwood & heavy water & high black stockings & the history of the Vikings & brass & obsolescence & burnt hair & collapsed soufflés & the impossibility of not falling in love in an art museum with the person standing next to you looking at the same painting & all the other things that just happen & are. But you want to make for yourself a world that is deliberately & meticulously personalized. A theater for your life, if I could put it like that. Don’t live an accident. Don’t call a knife a knife. Live a life that has never been lived before, in which everything you experience is yours and only yours. Make accidents on purpose. Call a knife a name by which only you will recognize it. Now I’m not a very smart man, but I’m not a dumb one, either. So listen: If you can manage what I’ve told you, as I was never able to, you will give your life meaning.” — Jonathan Safran Foer, A Convergence Of Birds.
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 13/28
[ 13 February 2009, 00:53 ]
“First comes thought; then organization of that thought, into ideas & plans; then transformation of those plans into reality. The beginning, as you will observe, is in your imagination.” — Napoleon Hill
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 8/28
[ 7 February 2009, 16:25 ]
“My idea of feminism is self-determination, & it’s very open-ended: every woman has the right to become herself, & do whatever she needs to do.” — Ani DiFranco
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video Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 7/28
[ 7 February 2009, 03:47 ]
“Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” — Mohandas Gandhi
You are so much stronger than you realise.
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 4/28
[ 3 February 2009, 15:50 ]
“You’ve got to own your own days & name them, each one of them, every one of them, or else the years go right by & none of them belong to you.” — Herb Gardner
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 2/28
[ 2 February 2009, 04:58 ]
“If there is no struggle, there is no progress.” — Frederick Douglass
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge: 1/28
[ 1 February 2009, 03:49 ]
“Personal transformation can & does have global effects. As we go, so goes the world, for the world is us. The revolution that will save the world is ultimately a personal one.” — Marianne Williamson
It’s the first day! How has it gone for you so far? If you — like me — are in New Zealand, where it’s 10.47pm, & today hasn’t started with a hiss & a roar like you hoped, don’t fret. It’s only 4.48am in New York City — their first day has barely even begun! They’re all asleep! You’re still ahead of the curve!
Take a few moments to make some positive steps in the direction of what you want before you go to bed. It’s not too late, & you’ll feel so much happier tomorrow.
Love letters & feather headdresses,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!I Love The Red Book!
[ 31 January 2009, 16:12 ]
Do you own a copy of Sera Beak’s The Red Book: A Deliciously Unorthodox Approach to Igniting Your Divine Spark yet? If not, how come?! I’m re-reading it right now & this segment jumped out at me. I hope you enjoy it!
Role Playing
As you’ve probably gathered by now, you have a special purpose. You’ve got certain things to do & people to see & flowers to smell & experiences to have that your intuition is constantly guiding you toward. You have a role that needs to be played, & chances are, it’s the role of a lifetime. When lived truthfully, this role will consist of doing & being what you love & making a decent living from it. Whoa. Imagine that.
Now before you start dreaming of exotic travels & radical business plans & living in Turkey, please realize that most people’s roles while here on this earthly plane for such a quick blink of time aren’t nearly so dramatic or far-reaching; one person’s role might be as seemingly simple as becoming, say, a conductor of high-frequency love while living on a particularly bleak city block, while another’s is to be an amazing mother, while another’s is to grow organic food, or save lemurs, or work at that magazine.
Although your intuition might lead you (or might have already led you) toward a role that might not seem all that glamorous, it doesn’t make it any less important or meaningful or soul-rocking. There might be thousands of first-grade teachers, but only you can give hope to those specific children in that specific children at that specific time. Let’s face it, not everyone can be a Nelson Mandela, because as amazing as that man is, the universe doesn’t need millions of him. The universe needs, well, you. & only you can do what it is you do, in your unique way. So please don’t shut down your unique abilities with doubt or comparisons or critiques (“Working at this cafe or teaching music to the elderly or writing poetry on my lunch break can’t be all that cosmically significant; just look at that guy I saw on 20/20 who’s setting up HIV clinics in Africa”). Gandhi said, “Whatever you do may seem insignificant to you, but it is most important that you do it.” Trust me, when you believe in yourself & fulfil your role to the best of your ability, you are a spiritual superstar, as powerful & as needed as any soul on the planet. As modern dance genius Martha Graham so beautifully put it, “There is a vitality, a life force, a quickening that is translated through you into action. & because there is only one of you in time, this expression is unique. & if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium & be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is: nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours, clearly & directly. To keep the channel open” (quoted in Rob Brezsny’s Pronoia, p. 76).
This is a mysteriously connected universe. We don’t always consciously know how far our energy might reach & how intense its effect might be, but by doig what you intuitively feel you should be doing in this world (be it a career, a project, an art piece, a relationship), you are actually, believe it or not, helping to infuse this planet & even the entire cosmos with deep soulful purpose as well as encouraging other beings to seek out & bravely live their own role. (There is more about this phenomenon in the next chapter.)
Of course, when we start becoming more connected to & more expressive of who we really are, the seemingly random roles we play become just natural extensions of ourselves. Intuitive hits about what your role is (for right now) may not always suggest a huge change from what you are already doing, but they should help you do what you do more consciously. Richard Bach wrote, “Here is a test to find whether your mission on earth is finished: if you’re alive, it isn’t” (Illusions, p. 159). So what’s your part to play now? How can you be it even better? Don’t know if you’ve found what you’re meant to do or be quite yet? Don’t fret; when it’s time, the universe will give you plenty of external & internal hints, but here’s mine: You’ll know when you find it because it will make you feel very alive, happy, aligned, content — even if it challenges you & pushes your limits & freaks you out a bit. You will know, on a cell-tingling level, that you are doing what you are meant to do, no matter how mundane it might appear to others, or even to your ego. You will know by how intensely you’re existing.
P.S. Buy the book!
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote Of The Day -- 25th October 2008
[ 25 October 2008, 05:34 ]
“It doesn’t get easier to tell the truth. It always gets harder. The deeper you go, the harder it gets.
The great revolution of women writing honestly about their lives, their sexual and emotional selves, quickly ossified into convention and was co-opted by formula-writers. Female pain and female sexuality became commonplace. Danger became safe. Risk became predictable. A new convention was born: the convention of the confessional novel.
Start again. Go into your heart and find your own truth. That will always be untarnished, fresh, red as arterial blood. And pulsing.”
— Erica Jong
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [31] Tags: inspiration,
quote Add Gala on Twitter!Andy Warhol's Beauty Tips
[ 5 August 2008, 15:10 ]
A good plain look is my favorite look. If I didn’t want to look so “bad,” I would want to look “plain.” That would be my next choice.
Weight isn’t important the way the magazines make you think it is. I know a girl who just looks at her face in the medicine cabinet mirror & never looks below her shoulders, & she’s four or five hundred pounds but she doesn’t see all that, she just sees a beautiful face & therefore she thinks she’s a beauty. & therefore I think she’s a beauty, too, because I usually accept people on the basis of their self-images, because their self-images have more to do with the way they think than their objective-images do. Maybe she’s six hundred pounds, who knows. If she doesn’t care, I don’t.
There should be a lot of new girls in town, & there always are.
If you’re naturally pale, you should put on a lot of blush-on to compensate. But if you’ve got a big nose, just play it up, & if you have a pimple, put on the pimple cream in a way that will make it really stand out — “There! I use pimple cream!” There is a difference.
Beauty really has to do with the way a person carries it off. When you see “beauty” it has to do with the place, with what they’re wearing, what they’re standing next to, what closet they’re coming down the stairs from.
Sometimes something can look beautiful just because it’s different in some way from the other things around it. One red petunia in a window box will look very beautiful if all the rest of them are white, & vice-versa.
When you’re in Sweden & you see beautiful person after beautiful person & you finally don’t even turn around to look because you know the next person you see will be just as beautiful as the one you didn’t bother to turn around to look at — in a place like that you can get so bored that when you see a person who’s not beautiful, they look very beautiful to you because they break the beautiful monotony.
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [71] Tags: aesthetic,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote Of The Day -- 14th July 2008
[ 14 July 2008, 08:25 ]
Advice to Beginners by Ellen Kort
Begin. Keep on beginning. Nibble on everything.
Take a hike. Teach yourself to whistle. Lie.
The older you get the more they’ll want your stories.
Make them up. Talk to stones. Short-out electric
fences. Swim with the sea turtle into the moon. Learn
how to die. Eat moonshine pie. Drink wild geranium
tea. Run naked in the rain. Everything that happens
will happen and none of us will be safe from it.
Pull up anchors. Sit close to the god of night.
Lie still in a stream and breathe water. Climb to the top
of the highest tree until you come to the branch
where the blue heron sleeps. Eat poems for breakfast.
Wear them on your forehead. Lick the mountain’s
bare shoulder. Measure the color of days
around your mother’s death. Put your hands
over your face and listen to what they tell you.
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [37] Tags: quote Add Gala on Twitter!How To Be A Leader
[ 8 July 2008, 08:08 ]
When you think of a leader, who springs to mind? The CEO of your company? John F. Kennedy? The woman who heads up your book-club? Your friend who always organise your group’s social activities? All of these people lead others in some way or another. That’s the thing: leadership comes in many different forms.
Even if the idea of growing up to be a corporate big-wig is the sort of thing which has you waking up in a cold sweat, sometimes a leadership role is one you will have to assume unexpectedly, at the last moment. You never know when you’ll be asked to step up to the plate, & for this reason, having a few core leadership skills will always serve you magnificently.
So, what are the essential elements of leadership? What skills & assets do you need in order to steer a group of people in one direction or the other?
Have a vision
If a vision is difficult for you to come up with, at the very least you need to have a set of ideals or beliefs that are important to you. When you look at great leaders from history — Martin Luther King Jr, Gandhi, Winston Churchill — you realise that one thing they all had in common was a very strong devotion to a specific cause.
You will need to have something similar. It doesn’t matter what your vision is. It could be about constructing a Utopian society, introducing a new form of recycling, devotion to real sex education in schools, free cupcakes for everyone on Fridays or compulsory comfort tests for stiletto manufacturers. Really, it’s up to you. The only “rule” as such is that you have to believe in it. It has to be real to you. It has to be something that you think is worth fighting for.
Don’t worry if you don’t know how to make your vision come to life. The human brain is a marvellous thing, capable of solving incredibly complicated problems while we, its humble owners, sleep peacefully. You’ll get there. The first step, & it’s a critical one, is just to have a vision.
“Absolute identity with one’s cause is the first and great condition of successful leadership.” — Woodrow Wilson
Be prepared to make tough decisions
Being a leader means the onus is on you. As a leader, you’re the person who has to make the difficult choices — there is no one else to shift the blame to. You’re at the top of the chain of command, so you can’t make excuses or wriggle out of responsibility, no matter how much you may want to!
Sometimes that means you have to fire or demote a friend, start saying “no” when “yes” would be much easier, or set out a new moral code. People don’t always take kindly to the person making these decisions. That can be unpleasant — no one wants to be disliked. Unfortunately, sometimes to make steps in the right direction, you have to be the bad guy.
Being a leader often means saying or doing what is unpopular — & sometimes, carving out your own path alone until you find other people who agree with you. This can sometimes seem like a heavy burden, & it can certainly be hard work, but ultimately it is what is needed to implement real change.
“The art of leadership is saying no, not yes. It is very easy to say yes.” — Tony Blair
Set an example
Let me put this to you plainly. If you tell everyone else that they should live the life of their dreams, but in secret all you really do is sit on your couch eating potato chips, you’re not setting a good example! It’s important to be inspiring, & the best way to do that is to practice what you preach! After all, if it isn’t good enough for you, why would your intended audience bother?
You need to be a living, breathing embodiment of your ideals. The idea is to hold yourself up as a shining light, so that you can show others the way. That’s just it: it’s not enough to tell people what they should be doing, you need to actually show them, so they have someone to look to. Even your most ardent followers will fall off the wagon sometimes — & if all they have to do to get re-inspired is observe you, you’re making everyone’s lives easier.
Another reason that setting an example is important is that it will help gain you respect from your intended audience.
There are many ways that you can help generate respect for yourself, aside from making sure that you walk the walk as well as talking the talk. When you are establishing yourself as a leader, it’s important to act with integrity. You will have to decide what that means for you, because everyone, & everyone’s situations, are entirely different. Sometimes that means being transparent. Sometimes it means saying no (see above!) to someone who would like you to compromise your ideals. You will have to make your own decisions about this, but if you’re not sure, consider whether you’d want it splashed across the front page of the newspaper. Then act accordingly!
“We can’t drive our SUVs & eat as much as we want & keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times… & then just expect that other countries are going to say OK. That’s not leadership. That’s not going to happen.” — Barack Obama
Understand people
Having empathy for other people & the skills to communicate with them are two extremely important assets in any kind of leadership role. After all, usually as a leader, you are speaking for people — giving a voice to people who have none, or at least, no way to get heard. In order to do that, of course you need to get to know them!
There’s a reason why politicians go on the campaign trail. You have to get out & mix & mingle with the people so that they feel like you actually care about them. After all, who are you going to feel more positively about? Some chump in an office miles away, twiddling his thumbs, or a guy you’ve spoken to, who has kissed your baby & wished you well? The pure number of photographs of politicians smooching newborn children should give you the answer!
If you feel like you’re not that great with people — if, for example, you mostly just find them pretty irritating, or you’re not so hot at making pleasant chit-chat — you might like to work on that. Your local bookstore is an excellent resource. Pick up copies of How To Win Friends & Influence People & Please Understand Me, then take them home & devour them eagerly. You will learn a lot about other people’s personal psychology through these books, & if you’re hungry for more, take a peek at this.
The better your understanding of people, the easier you will find it to grasp their motivations & desires, which in turn will make it easier to work out how to get them to do what you want! Sneaky, huh?! It will also give you a much better picture of what you’re trying to achieve. Because it’s not just you, it’s you & your army. You need to incorporate them into your vision, & if you’re not a “people person”, you may find this hard to do.
Of course, theoretical knowledge is no good without actually putting it into practice. Make an effort to translate what you’ve learned into real-world experience. You might like to journal your experiences — you’ll find this a very valuable way of charting your growth, as well as learning what works & what doesn’t!
“The best leaders are always asking, “What should we do? Where should we be headed?” It’s a great way to communicate trust. People who make great leaders — the kind of leaders who, if they leave a company, others will jump ship to follow — are those who say, “Tell me what’s on your mind. Give me whatever you’ve got.” They’re open to learning, and they’re always looking for ways to learn. They never think they know everything there is to know. And they’re right.” (Do You Have What It Takes To Be A Great Leader? Fortune.)
Persevere
One of the reasons for having a strong vision — aside from the fact that it helps you steer in one direction or another — is that it will keep you going, even when times are tricky. If your vision is weak or non-existent, as soon as you hit a bump, you might just be tempted to retire to your boudoir & watch The Wizard Of Oz 23 times in a row while eating cheese out of a can (or something equally horrific).
Perseverance is an incredibly important quality for a leader. You need to have more tenacity, gumption & vim than anyone else on your team. If you give up, what do you think your supporters will do? (Yeah, you can probably guess.) You need to be prepared to keep pushing, even when the road ahead looks hard, & challenges start to appear in the distance — which will happen, make no mistake about it.
I mean, Martin Luther King Jr’s famous ‘I Have A Dream’ speech didn’t go, “Let freedom ring… & if not, no biggie”! There is a reason for this!
Another great quality many leaders have is that they welcome obstacles. It is often said that leaders are made by the way they deal with problems. While obstacles can make us groan & roll our eyes, it can help to view the overcoming of said obstacle as a huge step forward. Not to mention, the success of kicking your obstacle’s ass will give you further grit, determination & excitement to boot the next one to the curb!
Honestly, though, if it was easy, everyone would be doing it. That’s what makes you so brilliant, baby!
“Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable… Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, & struggle; the tireless exertions & passionate concern of dedicated individuals.” — Martin Luther King Jr.
“If you’re trying to achieve, there will be roadblocks. I’ve had them; everybody has had them. But obstacles don’t have to stop you. If you run into a wall, don’t turn around & give up. Figure out how to climb it, go through it, or work around it.” — Michael Jordan
Be positive
How many leaders do you know that eventually hit a wall, throw up their hands & yell for mercy? That’s right — in the words of Scribe, a New Zealand rapper, “not many, if any”.
A real leader keeps their chin up even when the outlook is a bit misty — or downright stormy. While that might sound tricky, it really comes from their own very strong beliefs that they are doing what is right, & what is necessary. Crusading for bulldog clips in a range of pastel colours is the sort of thing you could probably let slide, but working for justice, racial equality, truth, love or beauty? Pshhhaw. If it means anything to you, you’re not just going to give up on it.
This is not to say that great leaders are never defeated, because sometimes things don’t go to plan. But the point is that they get back up again & keep fighting!
“There is little difference in people, but that little difference makes a big difference. The little difference is attitude. The big difference is whether it is positive or negative.” — W. Clement Stone
So, how can you practice leadership? It’s easier than you might think. All of the attributes of being a leader, as listed above, are things you can start implementing in your life, even if you are a hermit in a cave. Make an effort to be positive. Have a vision for yourself. Start to welcome challenges & congratulate yourself when you overcome them. Leader or no, all of these things will set you up for massive success.
The next thing you might like to try is volunteering yourself for small leadership roles. Put your hand up for the position of captain of your club, offer to lead a project at work, start organising social events for you & your friends, boss your boyfriend around in bed! (Blush!) Taking charge in these small ways will challenge you while simultaneously helping to build up your confidence in your own abilities.
It might seem like a long way from there to Napoleon, but the more you practice your leadership skills, the closer you’ll get. Silly hat entirely optional, of course!
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [41] Tags: how to,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote Of The Day -- 5th July 2008
[ 5 July 2008, 14:21 ]
“I can’t tell you how many times I’ve known, from my deepest self, that I needed to move on or make an uncomfortable change, but fear kept me scared stiff. It happens to all of us. I reacted to my intuition the way many of us do: I hoped the vibes would go away & leave me the hell alone. Not a good idea. Every time I did this, without fail, my body would start to act up — migraines, irritable bowel, sinus infections, eczema, horrible menstrual periods, you name it. The fact is, my body wasn’t just going to sit by & let me deny my truth. Now, I’m not saying every illness or rash is due to you ignoring your truth, but for me & for several other people I know, when we disregard the deep knowledge that change is wanted in our life, sooner or later, the body will let us know — & not in a good way.
“The body never lies. It’s your spiritual tuning fork. So it’s your responsibility not to merely cover up its signals with expensive lotions & Pepto-Bismal but to sit down & really listen to what is underneath those symptoms.” — Sera Beak
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [41] Tags: life,
quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote Of The Day -- 16th June 2008
[ 16 June 2008, 12:08 ]
“Find a way, whether through asking or praying, imagining or pretending, broiling or baking, to constantly remind yourself that I am always at your side, armed to the teeth with love, able to shock and delight, and probably, haute couture from head to toe.” — The Universe
P.S. Pictures from NASA.
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [34] Tags: inspiration,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote Of The Day -- 10th June 2008
[ 10 June 2008, 12:24 ]
I just received this email from DailyOM. (You should subscribe to their mailing list!) These words are beautiful, illuminating & true.
Personal Satisfaction — Doing Our Best
We often come into contact with the idea that our best isn’t good enough, as if this were actually possible. If you examine this notion, you will begin to see that it doesn’t make much sense. Your best is always good enough, because it comes from you, and you are always good enough. You may not be able to deliver someone else’s idea of the best, but the good news is that’s not your burden. You only need to fulfill your own potential, and as long as you remain true to that calling, and always do your best to fulfill your purpose, you don’t need to expect anything more from yourself.
It’s easy to get tangled up with the idea of trying to be the best—the best parent, the best employee, the best child, or best friend. If we try to be the best, we run the risk of short-circuiting our originality because we are striving to fit into someone else’s vision of success. In addition, if everyone is striving for the same outcome, we lose out on creativity, diversity, and visionary alternatives to the way things are done. On another note, there is nothing wrong with wanting to improve, but examining where this feeling comes from is important because wanting to be better than others is our ego coming into play.
Letting go of the tendency to hold ourselves up to other people’s standards, and letting go of the belief that we need to compete and win, doesn’t mean we don’t believe in doing the best job we can. We always strive to do our best, because when we do we create a life free of regret, knowing we have performed to the best of our ability. This allows us to feel great personal satisfaction in all of our efforts, regardless of how others perceive the outcome.
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [24] Tags: inspiration,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Style Tips -- 8th June 2008
[ 8 June 2008, 12:43 ]
“One of God’s own prototypes. A high-powered mutant of some kind never even considered for mass production. Too weird to live, too rare to die.”
Next time you’re feeling a bit dour, strip down to your underwear & do a faux-sexy dance in front of the mirror. I think Sade’s Smooth Operator makes a good soundtrack for this kind of activity! Pout your lips, toss your hair & wiggle your hips. Glance back over your shoulder & wink at your reflection. I guarantee it will make you smile & feel at least a little bit better!
Regardless of your financial situation, treat your friend to a meal. It doesn’t have to be 5-star, it could just be a slice of pizza & a drink, but it will leave a huge impression, & they will love you for it.
If you feel awkward next time you go out dancing — like you don’t look good or you don’t dance well enough or you’re not cool enough to be there — take a break. Go to the corner of the room, drink some water, survey the scene & make a decision. Decide to own yourself & what you’re doing. Own your dancing, own your body, take control. Decide that you’re sexy, amazing, cool & glamorous. Decide that you’re a fabulous dancer & that you’re just going to cut loose. Decide that you’re the queen (or king) of the room & that everyone else in there is just your loyal subject, dancing for your entertainment. Imagine you are wearing a crown (or put on a tiara if you feel that way inclined!). Don’t feel the need to dance a certain way — just be you. Claim a place on the dance floor, flick your hair, spin around & keep your head up. You have to own it. As soon as you act like you belong to be there, you’ll start to have much more fun & people’s reactions to you will mirror that back at you. Plus, there’s nothing more appealing than a confident person having fun on the dance floor!
Make cupcakes at 3am with a friend. Scoff them & then collapse into a sugar & exhaustion-induced coma. Fabuleux!
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [46] Tags: inspiration,
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style tips Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 4th June 2008
[ 4 June 2008, 09:17 ]
“You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure about you. We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us.” — Marianne Williamson
I would add to this:
Always be yourself. Your loud, brave, unabashed, scandalous, original, exceptional, truly magnificent, self-lovin’, horn-tootin’, crowd-wavin’, kiss-blowin’ self.
Always be yourself. You may face criticism, dirty looks & gossip over the back fence, but at least you will have honoured yourself, done your best, been true & authentic.
Always be yourself. No one else shines like you — nor can they illuminate a room, thrill onlookers or shatter perceptions in the amazing way you do.
Always be yourself. Your life is yours alone, to do with as you please. Don’t feel that you have to serve other people; in the end, it is only you who matters.
Always be yourself. If you want to live the life of your dreams, you have to make it happen. No one else is going to do it for you. Get off your toosh, toots, & start!
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [70] Tags: inspiration,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!iCiNG Transformation Challenge -- How'd You Do?
[ 19 May 2008, 09:40 ]
Well, for a lot of you, today is the last day of the iCiNG Transformation Challenge. Phew! It’s been an interesting month, huh?
I thought this might be a good place for us all to discuss our final results & see how we feel about how well we did. I’d love to hear what you think helped you, & what might be useful in the future if we ever decide to do this again!
I noticed that most of us were pretty gung-ho for the first week & a half or so, but then things really started to taper off. Did you lose interest, get too busy, decide your goal wasn’t really that important, or something else?
My life was thrown for a bit of a loop when we decided to up sticks & come to the States, but thankfully I managed to stay on track pretty well. I’ve eaten a lot of great raw food while I’ve been here, & I’ve also exercised every day — whether I wanted to or not, haha! I have walked miles & miles & miles, & while it isn’t the world’s most stimulating exercise, it still counts! (Especially given the way I walk, which is typically quite fast.)
I haven’t been doing weights like I thought I would, but the interesting thing I’ve noticed is that the more raw food I eat, the more muscle develops on my body. Almost like the exertion (ha!) of lifting a piece of celery to my mouth makes my biceps bulge. But it’s really cool — I’m doing practically no work & my body is redefining itself. I’m pretty okay with that, & plan to keep it up!
So, how did you go? What were your greatest triumphs & challenges? Tell us!
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 6th February 2008
[ 6 February 2008, 14:31 ]
“Don’t fight darkness. Bring the light & darkness will disappear.” — Maharishi Mahesh Yogi.
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Comment [13] Tags: inspiration,
quote Add Gala on Twitter!DailyOm
[ 5 January 2008, 12:17 ]
I recently subscribed to a regular newsletter that was recommended by my exceptionally clued-up friend Deanne from Tokyomade. It’s called DailyOm, & sometimes, it spills forth absolute gems.
Here’s what I received today — & as I read it, it was so applicable I actually said “Ouch!”.
Now Is The Time — Bloom Where You Are Planted
Having a vision for our future that differs from our current circumstances can be inspiring and exciting, but it can also keep us from fully committing to our present placement. We may become aware that this is happening when we notice our thoughts about the future distracting us from our participation in the moment. We may find upon searching our hearts that we are waiting for some future time or situation in order to self-actualize. This would be like a flower planted in North Dakota putting off blooming because it would prefer to do so in Illinois.
There are no guarantees in this life, so when we hold back we do so at the risk of never fully blossoming. This present moment always offers us the ground in which we can take root and open our hearts now. What this means is that we live fully, wherever we are, not hesitating because conditions are not perfect, or we might end up moving, or we haven’t found our life partner. This can be scary, because we might feel that we are giving up our cherished dreams if we do not agree to wait for them. But this notion that we have to hold back our life force now in order to find happiness later doesn’t really make sense. What might really be happening is that we are afraid to embrace this moment, and ourselves, just exactly as we are right now. This constitutes a tendency to hold back from fully loving ourselves, as we are, where we are.
We have a habit of presenting life with a set of conditions—ifs and whens that must be fulfilled before we will say yes to the gift of our lives. Now is the time for each of us to bloom where we are planted, overriding our tendency to hold back. Now is the time to say yes, to be brave and commit fully to ourselves, because until we do no one else will. Now is the time to be vulnerable, unfolding delicately yet fully into the space in which we find ourselves.
Wise words. Subscribe!
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Comment [21] Tags: inspiration,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!A Thought For 2008
[ 1 January 2008, 11:16 ]
“When you do a thing, do it with all your might. Put your whole soul into it. Stamp it with your own personality. Be active, be energetic, be enthusiastic and faithful, and you will accomplish your objective. Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Comment [24] Tags: quote Add Gala on Twitter!Isabel Toledo
[ 13 December 2007, 15:28 ]
Questions & answers. Excerpted from The Little Black Book of Style, by Nina Garcia.
Q: What is the secret to buying & wearing a strong shape?
A: The secret to wearing strong shapes is BODY LANGUAGE — a woman has to be comfortable in her own skin to make strong shapes work for her. Once you know yourself & understand how to use your body language, clothes with shape can enhance your graphic presence & help to project your own personal style.
Q: What is your secret to mixing the practical with the fantastical?
A: This is the essence of style for me. How you mix opposites & rearrange realities to get at a deeper truth. I love the practical & build everything around it first. Fantastical just happens when you are open to it & can evaporate just as quickly. It has been my experience that from the fantastical, often the practical is born.
Q: What is the one item of clothing every woman must have in her closet?
A: Underwear!!! For me, a wonderful wardrobe of exquisite underclothes is the ultimate luxury. It is what you first put on, & no matter what your look is, there is nothing that can elevate your mood as much as what you have on underneath it all. Different undergarments for different types of clothes are essential to make a look work for you.
Q: What do you find eternally stylish?
A: Good grooming is the one thing that is a permanently stylish element. When you are perfectly groomed, you can conquer the world… even in a pair of old jeans & a t-shirt!
Q: Who are some of the most stylish women you know?
A: I adore the classic generations’ sense of ageless style. Maria Feliz, Louise Bourgeois, Iris Apfel, Anna Piaggi, Louise Nevelson, Frida Kahlo — they have all shown us that an independent & confident sense of yourself is what it is all about. Diana Vreeland, who I had the fortune to intern with at the Costume Institute at the Met, had that gift all her life — the joy of living & dressing up or down for any challenge. We had the same shoe size & she would insist on trying on my picks that I found on Canal Street. That curiosity & enthusiasm is a real gift & the reward of a fertile mind & an open spirit — that is what fuels fashion!
Love letters & feather headdresses,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!John Galliano
[ 8 December 2007, 17:09 ]
Questions & answers. Excerpted from The Little Black Book of Style, by Nina Garcia.
Q: Is too much really never enough?
A: Too much imagination? Too much fun? Too much excitement? Too much adventure? NO WAY! Enough is never enough & when you are tired of the routine you have to go seek adventure so that you never get enough — feed your mind, body & soul, & live life in a technicolour of imagination.
Q: What one item should be in every woman’s closet?
A: A lover — that something seductive to get them there!
Q: How many different cultures have affected your designs?
A: Styles, cultures, women from around the world are like different timbres of music — there is so much to dance to. You should never stand still.
Q: What do you find eternally stylish?
A: The great Dodie Rosenkrans — she has the eye, the style, & the imagination that makes her the Peggy Guggenheim of the fashion world, & I am honored to be a part of her collection!
Q: Who is the most stylish woman you know?
A: Kate Moss — always has been — always will be. She dresses for herself, for her mood, & that is what makes her WOW!
Q: What is glamour today?
A: Confidence, independence, not giving a damn, & going for it — glamour is luxury, quality, knowing your stuff & indulging your desires — in fashion, life & living.
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [21] Tags: inspiration,
quote Add Gala on Twitter!Things I Love Thursday
[ 15 November 2007, 13:40 ]
Photo key:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25
False eyelashes — At the moment, I wear them almost every day. I adore them! I like to bat them & pretend to be Bambi. I have a pair which are decorated with little pearls & they kind of make me feel like Marie Antoinette. ...Marie Antoinette with neon purple hair. But you know what I mean!
Accents — I am on a big accent kick right now. I just love them! They’re so interesting! I always think about them a lot because my accent is weird, kind of a British/New Zealand mix, & Australian accents are still really bizarre to me! I think that if someone’s words are the outline of a drawing, accents are the colour within the lines. They tell stories of where people came from & where they have been. As a child I used to speak in different accents all the time & record them on a dictaphone!
Saying “epic”, “major” & “so very” — I can’t help myself. I say these things all the time. I picked “major” up from Ms Beckham — it is fabulous. & I said “epic” at least 5 times in my last makeup class. (To be fair, we were looking at really major [ha!] fashion eye makeup, & it WAS epic!)
My stubbed toe — Usually not so cool (I walked into the trampoline, OUCH!), but it’s turning purple & I think it’s kind of sweet because it looks like it’s trying to match my hair! Maybe it just felt left out… I am giving it lots of love just in case.
Breaking free of my hermit shackles — I am a bit of a workaholic so it’s very easy for me to abandon the outside world in favour of typing away at my desk. From now until the new year, we’re going to have about 8 visitors (!!!) from NZ & the UK, & in the next two days I have social occasions with two people I have never met before. Exciting!
My boyfriend — aka King Gimlet! (Gimlet is my new pet name for pretty much everyone, but my boyfriend is the King of them!) He does this really neat all-singing, all-dancing breakfast weasel act which I really like. Also we sometimes have lobster fights which is where you put your elbows up in front of you & try to grab the other person’s head between them. It is way more fun than it sounds. Simon
Honourable mentions: “Clicking” with people; shiny new opportunities; fossicking around with my new hairstyle; rediscovering old music (at the moment it’s Tool, which I haven’t listened to in years!); baby blue & baby pink; hair dusted with candy-scented powder; making faces at the window cleaners (it cracks me up); Christmas lillies (snow white with hot pink spots!); clearing out my inbox; full-length fur coats; eyeballing all the purikura sheets I have clipped to my desk lamp; Disneyland; sticking jewels & crystals on my face; eating an ice-cream while watching A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila (& further to that, Domenico & Amanda & Bobby & Dani — it took me a long time to like her, but I do); Turkish delight; this picture & secret admirers!
Oh, & this video.
“Nothing is worth more than this day.” — Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Join me in making the most of your day by expressing your undying L-U-R-V-E for whatever is thrilling you! The postman, your new slippers, holographic nailpolish, home-cooked meals… ? Spill it!
Love letters & feather headdresses,
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things i love thursday Add Gala on Twitter!Quotes of the Day -- 3rd October 2007
[ 4 October 2007, 00:04 ]
All of these are from the fabulous Eleanor Roosevelt.
“Do what you feel in your heart to be right — for you’ll be criticized anyway.”
“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.”
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.”
“Freedom makes a huge requirement of every human being. With freedom comes responsibility. For the person who is unwilling to grow up, the person who does not want to carry his own weight, this is a frightening prospect.”
“Have convictions. Be friendly. Stick to your beliefs as they stick to theirs. Work as hard as they do.”
“It is better to light one small candle than to curse the darkness.”
Love letters & feather headdresses,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 5th September 2007
[ 5 September 2007, 10:51 ]
“It is absurd to divide people into good & bad. People are either charming or tedious.” — Oscar Wilde
I love this. Talk about a fabulous barometer for life. ‘Am I being charming or tedious? Hmmmm…’
Love letters & feather headdresses,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 26th August 2007
[ 26 August 2007, 20:59 ]
“There is not one big cosmic meaning for all, there is only the meaning we each give to our life, an individual meaning, an individual plot, like an individual novel, a book for each person.”
— Anaïs Nin
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Comment [12] Tags: quote Add Gala on Twitter!More Days To Celebrate
[ 25 June 2007, 14:02 ]
A while ago, I wrote Living A More Celebratory Life, with ideas of things to do to make your life more exciting. Here are some more days to celebrate!
May 14th: Sofia Coppola‘s birthday
Why? A visionary director, Sofia’s movies (The Virgin Suicides, Lost In Translation & Marie Antoinette) are slow, beautiful & evocative.
How? Watch her first movie, Lick The Star (parts one & two). Eat cakes & drink champagne in the long grass. Visit a temple. Stick up pictures of Japan. Wear a pink wig & do karaoke. Tease your hair into an enormous bouffant.
August 28th: Johann Wolfgang von Goethe‘s birthday
Why? Because he was a polymath: a fabulous poet, novelist, dramatist, theorist, painter & scientist. He was one of the most enlightened thinkers of all time. He also said amazing things.
How? Read Faust. Go horse-riding. Hold a puppet show with a friend. Write poems in bed. Look closely at colours. Learn some German phrases. Sehr gut!
September 10th: Karl Lagerfeld‘s birthday
Why? Because he is the best kind of eccentric genius. He works like a demon, is mindblowingly creative in all aspects of his life, & painfully stylish. If you need more proof: 1 & 2.
How? Wear a starched white shirt & rings on every finger. Go shopping for the perfect pair of fingerless gloves. Photograph models & bark at them in a German accent. Listen to your iPod constantly, or Cat Power, or his mix CD, Karl Lagerfeld: Les Musiques Que J’Aime. Eat at Taco Bell.
“People who say that yesterday was better than today are ultimately devaluing their own existence.” — Karl Lagerfeld
October 10th: Carrie Bradshaw‘s birthday (according to Wikipedia!)
Why? Because she’s the most fantastic character on television ever. (You think I am exaggerating. I am not. This is how deep my love runs. She is like the best friend I never had.)
How? Watch every episode of Sex & The City ever made (though this is a regular event in the iCiNG Bowl). Go shoe shopping. Go to a movie alone. Write a bad column — include the line, “I couldn’t help but wonder…”! Max out your credit card. Drink cosmopolitans with your three best friends. Allow your outfits to evolve throughout the day. Decide to become a well-known “party girl”. Dance to Henry Mancini’s “Moon River“ with an incredibly sexy older man.
November 27th: Manolo Blahnik‘s birthday
Why? Oh, come on! Why?!
How? Prance around your bedroom in your favourite shoes. Go online shoe-shopping. Give yourself a pedicure. Get a foot massage. Polish your shoes. You get the idea.
November 19th: Isabella Blow‘s birthday
Why? Isabella’s death was a very sad thing. She was SUCH an original, so very iconic. Isabella was the fashion director of Tatler & milliner Phillip Treacy’s muse. She is credited with having discovered models Sophie Dahl & Stella Tennant, as well as Alexander McQueen.
How? Wear a fabulous hat all day. Befriend & help anyone you think is a fresh talent. Have an affair with a gondolier. Remember to wear lipstick!
“If you don’t wear lipstick, I can’t talk to you. You need to have lips – they are important for getting men.” — Isabella Blow
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!The Cheap Date Guide To Style -- Book Review
[ 22 June 2007, 11:31 ]
A couple of months ago, when I was in Wellington, I picked up a copy of The Cheap Date Guide To Style by Kira Jolliffe & Bay Garnett. The cover was pink & silver with a quote from Sophie Dahl, so I had a flick through. I saw pictures of David Bowie, Diana Vreeland, Karl Lagerfeld & Jimi Hendrix, so decided to buy it.
I’m so glad I did! This book is great. It’s been perused by a great many people, all of whom then remark on what a good book it is. Kira & Bay are great, & they understand that individuality in fashion is important. The Cheap Date Guide To Style is all about that. Here are some quotes from the book which I liked. (Please don’t sue me.)
On what makes someone stylish…
“If a woman looks really stylish to me, not so much that I want to dress like her but that she just looks great, seems interesting & I want to talk to her. It’s not the same as being secretly intimidated by someone. I think style has to be easy-going or it becomes something else, a show…”
— Cecilia Dean (founder & creative director, V)
“I think thinking is stylish. Looking is stylish. Culture is stylish. I think you need to be inspired by something in order to look good. A poem, a picture of Wallis Simpson, tailoring… I have an obsession with Wallis Simpson. When people talk about ‘style’ & ‘stylish’, they’re talking about trends. She didn’t have a trend. She wore clothes that looked good on her. I think style is about a person recognising what their best features are. & if your best feature is a waist, wear a fucking waist. If you’ve got a good bust, go empire. I think it’s about finding a mood that you keep to. Then everyone can identify with that style. I think that’s unstylish is, as celebrities do nowadays, to borrow things from the PRs. They borrow, & it’s so clear that the dress has just been sent. You can feel the bike delivery.”
— Isabella Blow
Bay Garnett’s interview with Karl Lagerfeld.
Q: Is there such a thing as good taste nowadays?
A: Good taste only tastes good to the people who think they have good taste; a good taste can be very uncreative & boring. Good taste is something very bourgeois, very established, so it needs fresh air. People we consider to have bad taste as very happy with their bad taste. It’s not our problem. It’s pretentious to think one is an arbiter of taste. Who cares? What counts is how happy people are with their own garbage. They may think what we have is horrible, no?
Q: What do you think of Elvis Presley’s style?
A: A genius forever. There’s no one like him. The whole attitude.
As you can see, the whole thing is totally inspiring, full of pictures of style icons & pages of wonderful quotes from truly original dressers. Most fashion books are so generic, with tips on how to buy the right pair of pants for your bum, but so many of the women that write those books have no personal style whatsoever. Who would want to take their advice?! Kira & Bay have a very, very different take on things.
It’s a great book to have on the dresser, so if you’re feeling uninspired one morning, you can just pop it open & feast your eyes on something amazing & unique. If that doesn’t help you get dressed, I don’t know what will!
Love letters & feather headdresses,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quotes of the Day -- 14th April 2007
[ 14 April 2007, 13:20 ]
“I wanted a perfect ending. Now, I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme & some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle & end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment & making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity.”
— Gilda Radner
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
— Mark Twain
“Where nature goes to create stars, galaxies, quarks & leptons, you & I also go to create ourselves.”
— Deepak Chopra
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Comment [4] Tags: quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 24th March 2007
[ 24 March 2007, 16:19 ]
“Dress shabbily & they remember the dress; dress impeccably & they remember the woman.”
Coco Chanel.
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Tags: quote Add Gala on Twitter!What Does Your Clothing Say About You?
[ 28 February 2007, 22:38 ]
Have you ever thought about what message your clothing is projecting & what it says about you? What story do you think your outfit today told the world?
No, no. Don’t keep reading. Pause for a second & think about it. When you leave the house in the morning (or the evening), what are you & your outfit trying to say?
Really, it’s worth considering. How many times have you walked down the street & made a huge judgement call on someone else, PURELY based on what they’re wearing? (I know. It is awful, but it happens.) Do you dress for yourself or for other people? Are you trying to fit in with your friends, or impress the opposite sex for your own ultimate gain?
I was on my way to buy sushi on Friday night when I passed a girl wearing an extremely short dress with her boobs hanging out. She wasn’t unattractive, but seriously, I barely noticed her face. It was all about the boobs. What was she thinking before she left her bedroom? I am trying to be as non-judgmental here as is humanly possible, & maybe I am completely wrong, but I don’t think she was going to a rotary meeting. She looked like she was out to snag a mans (sic). I’m not talking about a first date at a little restaurant & flowers, I’m talking about nightclubs, bumping & grinding, & waking up in the morning feeling like a troll. (I think that “if you’ve got it, flaunt it” can be taken the wrong way sometimes.)
I have to tell you that this is hard to write without it sounding like I am judging casual sex — which I’m not. Maybe it wasn’t a good example. I also feel bad for really skinny girls who wear tracksuit pants so no one will notice.
People are free to do as they choose — all I think is that you should value yourself & your clothing should reflect that.
I like short skirts as much as the next girl, but I think there is a point where you stop dressing for yourself & start dressing for the benefit of others, & that’s when we start to have problems.
What you’re wearing & how you’re wearing it says so much about you — how you feel, which parts of your body you like & dislike, how confident & comfortable you are, & where you think you fit into the world. It is so interesting to think about all these things when you’re people-watching, but it is best applied to yourself: before you leave the house, before you buy a new dress or before you buy another pair of Converse to replace your last pair.
Are you a “scene” kid, secure in your goth, metal, emo or hip hop uniform, happy to fit in? Do you walk around clutching a Louis Vuitton bag in front of you, & if so, what does that say about you? Are you concealing nipple piercings behind your conservative blouse in a secret act of rebellion? Are you going for a European look, & does that mean you’re ashamed of your heritage? Are you dressed to resemble the latest celebrity-du-jour — & does that mean you’re completely devoid of your own style?
Ultimately, only you know what’s going on in your own life, & only you hold the secret decoder ring to your own outfit. But you don’t need to buy into all that scene crap, you don’t need to follow trends & you don’t need to impress anyone else. If you feel good it will mean more than any compliment a stranger could pay you.
Dress as if you are celebrating yourself in a room full of sleeping people.
Just do whatever it takes to make you happy. Your external appearance is yours & yours alone — yours to do whatever you please with. Clothing can transform you into anyone you want to be, which is something that I think International Dress-Up Day helps with. It reminds us that we can do whatever we please, that we can dress like our idols if that’s going to help us become more like the people we admire, or the person we imagine ourselves being. There is a whole secret language in the fabric we cover (or uncover) ourselves with, a secret language that bellows down the street in all directions.
“If you aren’t enjoying your clothes, then you really are missing the point.” Betty Halbreich.
Where is the real value in dressing for other people, anyway? Why not try impressing yourself? If you still really want the external validation, don’t worry — when your clothing is truly flattering & you are obviously happy in it, people will notice — but the point is that you will look good without having to devalue yourself or buy into anyone else’s ridiculous agenda.
If you can manage to untangle yourself from that huge part of society which says we must be liked, admired & fit in at all costs, you will start to realise & develop your own true style — the perfect gift to yourself, which no one can ever take away.
Love letters & feather headdresses,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Style Icons: Diana Vreeland
[ 30 January 2007, 15:52 ]
“You gotta have style. It helps you get up in the morning. It’s a way of life. Without it you’re nobody. I’m not talking about a lot of clothes.”
— Diana Vreeland.
I have her picture pegged onto a string of fairy lights going across my sitting room.
Diana Vreeland was an incredible woman. Born in 1906 in Paris, she spent most of her life in New York & rose to acclaim for her work as fashion editor at Harper’s Bazaar & later at Vogue. Her eccentricies are what make her so interesting to me. For example, she always had beautiful, perfectly manicured hands. She pronounced her name not as “Diana” but “Dee-Ann”. She invented the word “pizazz” (& many other words, including “faction” — a combination of fact & fiction). She was obsessed with the search for the perfect red & when having her apartment redecorated, told Billy Baldwin, “I want this room to be a garden — but a garden in hell.”
Bettina Ballard found Mrs. Vreeland’s red garden room “one of the most attractive atmospheres that I know,” comparing it to “an over-crowded Turkish seraglio on a rather elegant boat.” Books, bibelots, calculated clutter, personal pictures [among them, sketches by Augustus John, Bébé Bérard, & Cecil Beaton of herself], & “treasures, many Scotch snuffboxes in horn & silver, are massed on tables, walls, & shelves looking as if one could never get around to seeing them all. A long-stemmed anemone stands in a long-stemmed vase. There are oriental divans against the wall covered with inviting cushions, & she dines at a table pushed against a divan with bright cushions propped behind her back. She presides on a big Indian print-covered sofa like a sultan’s favourite, before & after dinner, with everyone gathered on small chairs at her feet. She lives in an atmosphere of informal luxury confined in crowded quarters, in an aura of intimacy & mystery.”
Diana wrote a column for Harper’s Bazaar called “Why Don’t You…?” which offered creative, but not necessarily practical ideas for its readers. Some of my favourite suggestions are:
Why Don’t You… wear violet velvet mittens with everything?
Why Don’t You… fit your clothes easily? Only English & Americans have this mania for snappy tightness.
Why Don’t You… have an elk-hide trunk for the back of your car? Hermès of Paris will make this.
Why Don’t You… have your cigarettes stamped with a personal insignia?
Why Don’t You… wear, like the Duchess of Kent, three enormous diamond stars arranged in your hair in front?
Why Don’t You… paint a map of the world on all four walls of your boys’ nursery so they won’t grow up with a provincial point of view?
“I’m terrible on facts. But I always have an idea. If you have an idea, you’re well ahead!”
— Diana Vreeland.
Diana wore her blue-black hair slicked back with lacquer, & believed that a good hairline & finely manicured hands were the hallmarks of elegance. She often wore a turban made from a scarf. She rarely made it to her office before noon, & was responsible for bringing animal prints into style (when a young Yves St Laurent showcased them in an early collection, Diana pushed them to the public). She paid incredible attention to detail & the fashion shoots she directed are evidence of this. She understood the concept of selling a fantasy to the public & was quoted as saying, “Give ‘em what they never knew they wanted!”
Part of the reason I find her so inspiring is that she was such an original. Her sense of personal style was strong & she did exactly as she pleased. I really admire anyone who just gets out there & isn’t afraid to show who they really are. She had many cruel things written about her — journalists mocked her starry-eyed “Why Don’t You…?” column & passed judgment on her appearance. Those things don’t matter anymore. Being a critic is easy, but Diana changed the course of fashion forever.
“Never worry about the facts. Just project an image to the public.”
— Diana Vreeland.
Extra For Experts:
Some quotes from Diana Vreeland: Bazaar Years by John Esten
Chapter excerpt from Allure, on Diana’s collaboration with Christopher Hemphill.
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Comment [5] Tags: aesthetic,
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quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 29th December 2006
[ 29 December 2006, 22:08 ]
“Appearance is a powerful thing. I know sometimes people can’t remember a word you’ve said, but can tell you exactly what you were wearing.”
Ann Richards
Love letters & feather headdresses,
Tags: quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 21st December 2006
[ 21 December 2006, 20:25 ]
“In order to be irreplaceable one must always be different.”
Coco Chanel.
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Comment [3] Tags: quote Add Gala on Twitter!Quote of the Day -- 17th December 2006
[ 17 December 2006, 01:36 ]
“A new dress doesn’t get you anywhere; it’s the life you’re living in the dress, & the sort of life you had lived before, & what you will do in it later.”
Diana Vreeland.
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