Pole-Dancing & Raunch Culture

[ 31 July 2007 ]

Pole-dancing
Photo by Raymond

I have wanted to try pole-dancing for a really long time. When I first heard that it was the new ‘fitness craze’, I passed it off as more of the same rubbish, but the more of it I see, the more appealing it becomes.

If you want proof that pole-dancing requires strength, fitness & grace, watch this (& be astounded):

Damn, she’s good.

I think my primary reason for wanting to do pole-dancing is that I have always been attracted to sports which are graceful & feminine but which kick your ass at the same time. (Hmmm, that sums up a lot of my life…) Gymnastics, trapeze, pole-dancing, yoga, butoh & cheerleading all fit into that category, & I’ve done all of them (except cheerleading, but not for lack of wanting to!).

I have wanted to take up pole-dancing for an incredibly long time. A friend of mine, Nadia, upon hearing this, suggested that we go along together, but then said, “And then there’s the whole moral dimension – would a pole-dancing class actually be buying into what Ariel Levi calls ‘raunch culture?’”

I saw her the day after she made this comment & we discussed the ‘raunch culture’ thing a little bit. My take on it is this. People should do what they want to do, as long as it makes them happy, & doesn’t involve maiming anyone else. It might be a simple philosophy, but it works for me. I think trying to constantly revolt against one agenda or another is very tiring & counter-productive. I don’t feel like I need to make a strong statement against the patriarchy by refusing to bake, if baking brings me pleasure. If I had a husband who expected me to be chained to the oven, making cakes & birthin’ babies, yes, I’d be doing something about it, but that’s not the life I live.

It might be a bit simplistic, but I think being happy is a pretty strong political statement.

Thoughts? (& anyone who’s given pole-dancing a go, let us know whether it works for you!)


Super-love & cupcakes,
Gala <3


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Comment

  1. I tried pole dancing for a hens night – and even just doing an hour of it – my thighs and arms were killing later in the night!
    I would love to do it more regulary because the instructor had the hottest body!

    <3 karina · Jul 31, 10:52 AM · #

  2. wow that girl IS really good. I have never tried it or given it much thought, but it seems like a really good & fun workout.

    & I agree with your life’s philosophy! I wish I had the guts to do what makes me happy – sometimes I’m even afraid to try & find out what does – society has conditioned us to be like little marionettes in a play we don’t even know the plot to…

    <3 Mari · Jul 31, 11:05 AM · #

  3. I’ve wanted to take it for about a year, when I first saw some pole dancing instructors perform – they were so good that it made me want to do it. I don’t think it’s raunchy at all, unless you are doing it naked, in front of a bunch of leering men, and even then, I have no problem with it.
    I think the same way as you – if it’s not hurting anyone else, then do what you want.
    I would be taking it now but I don’t have a lot of funds. I also want to take hoopdance but at least I have a DVD.

    <3 Opium · Jul 31, 11:21 AM · #

  4. I’ve been a litle absent commenting here, but not for a lack of reading!

    Anyway, I do agree with your philosophy, it is important to do what makes you happy no matter who says do or don’t about something. Although I think there is something to be said about doing pole dancing or anything that is construed as ‘raunchy’ with grace or at least (as you’ve done) with explaining your reasons for wanting to do it. The only reason I say this is when I look at Paris Hilton or Britney Spears (I know, I hate myself for bringing them up too) they might be considered raunchy in their appearance and actions, even if they make them happy.

    I look at my little sister, who is a gymnast and while I’d have no problem if she decided to do pole dancing, I’d want to make sure the atmosphere was a positive influence.

    Okay really long ramble, sorry.

    <3 Jess · Jul 31, 11:35 AM · #

  5. I had to read that book for my Gender and Sexuality class last semester, and it absolutely drove me crazy. Feminism has mutated so much, from a simple “women should be able to do what they want” to “YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING THAT MIGHT BE REMOTELY STEREOTYPICAL FOR A WOMAN TO DO.” How counterproductive! As interesting as the class was, it just made me over-think everything I do (as a woman) so much that I decided against having Gender Studies as a minor. Anyway, I totally agree with everything you’re saying here!

    <3 yoko · Jul 31, 11:39 AM · #

  6. I concur with your take on things. As long as people do what genuinely makes them happy not what they think should make them happy. I’ve seen a few people fall into that trap… I guess it just takes constant reminders…. ‘HEY! ARE YOU HAPPY DAMMIT?!’

    <3 Anna Rose · Jul 31, 11:50 AM · #

  7. I absolutely agree with your philosophy! Do what makes you happy and let others be damned!

    To speak more specifically: I used to try very very very hard to be a “good” liberal. . . always buy organic, never step foot inside some big chain that has morally bankrupt policies, only read the “right” books (whatever that means) and it made me miserable. I had to go to the opposit extreme and do whatever the f*ck I wanted for a while (and for me that meant things like eating a hot dog, seeing that huge blockbuster movie, shopping at Forever21)in order to figure out what exactly it was that I wanted, what exactly it was that made me happy.

    So all I have to say (after all of that) is go with what you desire girl! You seem to be doing a fabulous job at it!

    <3 Jeannine · Jul 31, 11:58 AM · #

  8. This is quite an interesting topic for me, so excuse me if I post a novel here! As a sex-positive feminist, I have no problem with pole dancing as long as it is what the woman wants to do and she is not being exploited – there isn’t someone behind the scenes making an unfair profit from it. I don’t think that fighting the bad elements of the sex industry has to involve banning it entirely, as there are obviously some sex workers who love their jobs and do whatever job they do because it is what they want to do more than anything else. I don’t think any women should stop doing what they want to do, I think it is the attitudes of society and men (the variety who haven’t realised that women are not objects yet) that need to be altered. Pole-dancing isn’t inherently wrong, so it shouldn’t be stopped, it is attitudes towards it that need to change. Expression vs. exploitation is a good way of summarising my thinking – expression of a woman’s sexuality through her own choices = good, exploitation of a woman’s sexuality through other people’s decisions = bad.

    In this vein, I am part of the group opposing the gym at my university for wanting to start pole dancing classes. We had a discussion with some cultural studies professors and decided that the only way we would allow it basically was if they ran them for men as well as for women, because then the sexual element is taken out of it, and can be seen as purely for exercise (they were trying to make out like their classes were going to make women more attractive to men, which we thought was really inappropriate for a university campus). But they don’t want to run them for men, funnily enough, so we’re still opposing them. This probably doesn’t make much sense as I’ve explained it, because the argument’s a lot more complicated than I can explain at 1am!

    Ye gods, I have written a novel! Sorry!

    <3 Eternity · Jul 31, 12:11 PM · #

  9. Hey Gala!!

    I haven’t tried pole-dancing yet but me and friends are enrolling into a class soon! One of them says that it is very difficult and you bruise a lot! Stil, I want to try, looks fun!!

    I agree with your philosophy, it is very simple yet very beautiful!!!

    Love your blog girl!!

    Kisses from Mexico.

    <3 Julieta · Jul 31, 12:32 PM · #

  10. Me and a couple of my friends have been wanting to try pole dancing lessons for a while, however, it seems that our quest will have to wait for the moment, more to due to outside factors than ourselves.

    We are all strong active Christians, and we all believe in waiting til marriage before engaging in any sexual activities. HOWEVER, being young, fairly liberal christians, we we all think that there’s no harm in pole dancing lessons, coz its just another style of dance, that looks like fun, and its not like we’re going to get our kit off in front of a load of random men! (we could pole dance for our husbands, one day, should we ever marry, but thats just good wholesome married fun wink)

    But despite our views, the rest of our families and church friends think just the opposite, so for the moment, its just easier to not do it, instead of having our entire social circle trying to save us :S

    One of my friends plans to have a second secret hens night where we take a pole dancing lesson!

    NB: This same friend and myself took up Salsa dancing for a while, and got hassled by the guys at our church for it being innapropriately sexy! We just laughed, and told them to get over it.

    Alas, Eternity, I also seem to have written a novel…

    <3 Damsel · Jul 31, 12:41 PM · #

  11. ‘Feminism has mutated so much, from a simple “women should be able to do what they want” to “YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING THAT MIGHT BE REMOTELY STEREOTYPICAL FOR A WOMAN TO DO.” ‘

    Thank you, yoko! Awesomely well expressed.

    Eternity – I can’t believe that the pole-dancing classes would be for women only! That seems ludicrous – surely they’d be open to all takers?

    Gala – go for it! That vid showed her strength, grace and flexibility, and none of it was inherently raunchy. I guess pole-dancing just has unfortunate connotations! But then plenty of things we do that display our bodies and what they can do (sports, dance, whatever), can be seen as big opportunities for perving even though they’re not intended as that. And some people have a problem with perving . . . ;-)

    <3 Nadine · Jul 31, 12:45 PM · #

  12. I think that the philosophy of people doing what makes them happy as long as it doesn’t harm anyone else is really nice, but doesn’t work all that well in our flawed world. Your actions have impacts, many that are non-physical, on others that may or may not be what you intended, and I think you should at least consider that when deciding on your own behavior.

    “Because it makes me happy” is a perfectly good reason for lighting up whenever a cheesy old Backstreet Boys song comes on, but not as much for “exposing my young sister to raunch culture without taking the time to educate her about the history of patriarchy and the context of the activity,” just as a rough example. I think parents and older siblings and teachers etc. all have the responsibility to at least try to be good role models within the context of their authority (i.e. what teachers do on their own time is completely up to them unless it starts affecting their teaching).

    Being environmentally friendly, supporting stores that treat their workers well, etc. may be more difficult and not exactly what makes you happy as it may be a bit more inconvenient or expensive, but it’s better for the world, and has a negative impact if you don’t, which I think should be more important than the amount of comfort it would bring you to not worry about it instead.

    <3 Katherine · Jul 31, 01:05 PM · #

  13. I agree with Katherine, but in life too much of anything can be a bad thing. In this case, I say go ahead! Pole-dancing would make me wake up early in the morning versus jumping on the treadmill or some other dull routine. Something that’s good for your body and your femininity – I love it! :D

    <3 Valerie · Jul 31, 01:34 PM · #

  14. Before you had any idea that ‘raunch culture’ existed, before you felt the feminist pressures of the world or the leer of a perverted other didn’t have amazing fun swinging yourself around any pole you came in contact with? I know I freakin’ did ! An avid pole dancer at the age of 7 or 8 I am sure I entertained the neighbours to no end! It was the 80s, poles and construction site sets were BIG!

    Make sure that pole is well bolted on and solid and you go for it honey. Swing, grind and shimmy like there is no one watching.

    ps You know ebay has got some tempting costumes! I am hooked!

    <3 tokyomade · Jul 31, 02:21 PM · #

  15. i’m a sex positive feminist myself & i agree, whole heartedly.

    i had a pole in my camp at BM last year & ohmygod, i thought it was easy. I was WRONG! i’d love to take a good class sometime. My only reluctance is, i don’t have anywhere to practice on my own aside from the playa.

    <3 Mary Bee · Jul 31, 02:52 PM · #

  16. I started taking pole dancing lessons about 4 months ago, and I usually train 4 – 5 times a week. You do bruise alot, and it is a lot harder than it looks.
    The fitness benefits are great though. You’ll gain so much tone and strength, particularly in your arms, and back, and it’s a great cardio work out too.
    It is loads and loads of fun! I enjoy it because it teaches me to move in a graceful and sexy way, it gives me a great work out, and it is consistently challenging. The Studio, where I train has a very positive and supportive all-women atmosphere.

    I haven’t read the link on Raunch culture yet, so I’m not ready to comment on that, but I agree with Gala’s view that if it makes you happy, and you’re not hurting anyone, then just do it!

    <3 Ritalin · Jul 31, 03:45 PM · #

  17. Hi Gala, I am a pole dancer. I have been a dancer my whole life, but I recently in the last year started dancing at a backwoods strip club and quickly picked up pole dancing. I am going to make a video soon and when I do I will send it off your way. Pole dancing is an underground world. I geuss that is why I like it so much. I have so much more balance and flexibilty then I have ever had. I have had a 50 year old man who was bouncer at the club I work at show me alot of what I know today. Anyways I am rambling, I just love pole dancing in its most seediest of outlets and as well as its artsy trendy form. I just got off of work (with some fresh pole burn from a new stunt) and I it was awesome to open your page and see your write up. Cheers!

    <3 Sweet Lola · Jul 31, 05:09 PM · #

  18. Poles have male eye-candy on them sometimes too:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QZ0X1OcEAYM

    I’ve done some of this kind of pole work rather than pole ‘dancing’. But I’m sure they are both equally fun and good for your body. So some people attach a different mental image to a woman with a pole than a man? Let them.

    I say try it :)

    <3 nicOla · Jul 31, 05:46 PM · #

  19. Yay! I’m part of the iCiNG oeuvre!

    Gala, I do agree with you to an extent as to the doing what makes you happy maxim. And I think it’s perfectly reasonable for someone like you, or me, or, I daresay, most iCiNG readers (we seem to be a smart lot). But I worry for this concept when applied to other people (there seem to be lot of people who are made very happy by very questionable things).

    In terms of pole-dancing – I’m very attracted to it as an artform. Like ballet or gymnastics or diving, it combines strength, skill and grace. However, I’ve also been to a strip-club and seen it performed in that context. And it was one of the most horrifying experiences of my life. But maybe that’s the crux of it – the political dimension of pole-dancing depends on its context it’s performed and the way it’s received.

    It also brings to mind the time I saw the SuicideGirls burlesque show – when I saw the strippers at a conventional establishment, it was totally debasing to the women who performed; they were completely objectified and sexualised. But when I saw the SuicideGirls, I felt it was an entirely different experience. Perhaps it was that the majority of the audience was women. Perhaps it was that the vibe was one of fun, titillation and tease, rather than the sleaze of the strip club. Or maybe it was just that I was more attracted to the SuicideGirls, so my moral qualms were superceded by baser instincts.

    I guess I think that pole-dancing for fun and fitness is okay, but the issues raised in this discussion should not be ignored. We can be positive, self-empowered women who pole-dance, or positive, self-empowered women who don’t. We may not want to waste time fighting against agendas, but it’s best to know that the agendas are there. (We don’t need to make grand gestures to change the world – everything you do every day is a political act. It is in the way you live daily that you can change the world you live in.)

    But I do think that people should read Ariel Levy’s “Female Chauvinist Pigs” – unlike Yoko, I found it to be a very illuminating and frightening read.

    <3 Nadia · Jul 31, 08:21 PM · #

  20. There are such good comments here! That pole dancing video is beautiful, and seems worlds away from the kind of sexual-display-type pole dancing you associate with strip clubs. It’s not even raunchy, it’s just gymnastics really.

    Re doing what makes you happy, I think often people find happiness where they’re conditioned to instead of looking deeper at what really makes them happy. Millions of people just doing what makes us happy (superficially, temporarily) is what got us into the global warming mess, massive consumer debt, the obesity ‘epidemic’, etc etc.

    I do think we should all strive to be happy — but we should question why we want to do things, and know whether our actions have any negative consequences. I guess my philosophy is ‘question everything’ — people will do whatever they want, but the world would be a better place if they understand what it actually is that they’re doing, and why. I think people would make different, better decisions if they thought/questioned more.

    I admire Ariel Levy as someone who questions everything, and provokes other people to question things, and I agree with a lot of what she says, but I think it would a real shame to rule out a sport (?) that, in the context of a gym, is basically harmless because of its history. Everyone likes to dance sexy, it’s just that most of us can’t do it upside down.

    <3 Annabel · Jul 31, 09:07 PM · #

  21. Sweet Lola, I thought I was going to be the only one until your post!

    I worked in my club for close to two years before I started dancing there, and I often had to teach the new girls basic moves – which is always amusing for all involved if you’re a hostess who to the knowledge of all concerned doesn’t dance!!

    Eternity, I totally agree with you about the exploitation factor. There is a really interesting article related to pole dancing called “The Dialectical Gaze:
    Exploring the Subject-Object Tension in the Performances of Women who Strip” .

    I love pole dancing, and I miss it…most of my friends who have “real” jobs now still can’t go inside a gents’ club without feeling a twinge of “I want to be on that stage.”

    I personally adored the attention it garnered me, I loved being this representation of heightened femininity. It’s like playing a role- no, it IS playing a role.

    Ah, what can I say…I guess I’m just an exhibitionist at heart!

    ps, I’m still thinking about getting a pole installed in my loungeroom, much to my housemates’ amusement!

    <3 Amy Lou · Jul 31, 09:42 PM · #

  22. Raunch doesn’t come into it when I pole dance. I am all about the spinning round and going upside down (and occasionally falling off my heels for no apparent reason in front of a whole gang of newbies I’m suppposed to be teaching), grinning and grimacing all the while. Ritalin knows.
    Don’t overthink it. Just book a class and stock up on arnica for your bruises.

    <3 Witnit · Jul 31, 11:12 PM · #

  23. As with anything, people’s impressions of pole dancing, burlesque shows and strip clubs will be coloured by the preconceptions and opinions they have formed before they’ve even stepped foot in the joint.
    If you think it will be sleazy and exploitative, then oftentimes that’s what you’ll see and experience. If you go into any experience with a completely open mind, well, you just might surprise yourself!
    Having been in a number of strip clubs, I can say that yes, there are some that have a sleazy exploitative vibe to them. The dancers look unhappy and tired, and you can see that they are dancing just to pay the bills.
    But there are also some clubs that are clean, well-run, and have an atmosphere of fun and entertainment. The dancers are cheerful, clearly enjoy what they do, and they’re good at it too. Many of them are classically trained dancers or gymnasts who have made a choice to take up exotic dancing as a profession, or are dancing to put themselves through college – because they enjoy dancing.
    Sure, there are some very negative strip clubs, but there are some positive ones too, staffed by smart, confident women who enjoy dancing.
    Denouncing all pole dancing, strip clubs and burlesque based on the fact that some are seedy and exploitative is kinda like refusing to wear any shoes because Nike uses Sweatshop labour, imo.

    While most people consider stripping as being part of the sex industry, my personal opinion is that on a continuum, it’s only a small step from modelling and acting. Most exotic dancers don’t use any more provocative dance moves than what you’ll see on MTV, and partial or full nudity is becoming pretty commonplace in high fashion photo-shoots as well.
    Of course, I’ve only been to strip-bars in NZ, so it may be a whole other kettle of fish in the US. Judging by videos, US clubs may be much more sexualised and sleazy.

    I realise my opinions will probably be pretty unpopular, and that’s ok, coz everyone’s entitled to their own opinion. But when I first visited a strip club, I did so with an open mind, I thought about my experience and I formed my own opinion from that. And personally, I think that’s the best way to form an opinion about anything.

    <3 Ritalin · Jul 31, 11:31 PM · #

  24. Oh, good post and good comments! What I think can be summed up like this: the… what would you call it… sex entertainment industry? Adult entertainment?

    Anyway, the foundation of that is that sex is a part of life, a part of our identities, it can be funny, it can be very artisic and expressive; it’s a good thing to explore and a good element of entertainment. Are there specific examples of its practice which are scary and degrading and insulting to witness? Yep, there’s a fuck of a lot of them. But then, that applies to every industry: think of boring old offices which catalogue the sales of paperclips (or whatever) which make their female employees wear makeup and short skirts. Or eateries which hire based on appearance rather than competence. But, that’s the nature of the beast in a capitalist, male-dominated society. It doesn’t specifically invalidate paperclips, or food, or dancing, or art, or sex.

    As for specifically pole dancing – sounds fun! A skill you can be proud to have learned!

    <3 Sir Frederick Chook · Jul 31, 11:37 PM · #

  25. Amy Lou – I tried to access that article but my university library hasn’t subscribed to the Journal of Contemporary Ethnography, argh! It sounds really interesting, though. Have you got the PDF?

    <3 Eternity · Jul 31, 11:57 PM · #

  26. Well,I am a huge fan of Levy’s Female Chauvinist Pigs book…

    But I say go for it. It seems to me that you want to do Pole Dancing for all the right reasons. I believe Levy was using Pole Dancing as simply an example… but you CAN take pole dancing and make it empowering, if you do it for the right reasons and not just because you want men to think you’re sexy.

    <3 Jessie Ngaio · Aug 1, 12:04 AM · #

  27. I don’t know if I’m really going to add anything new to what has already been said. I’d like to expand on Yoko’s observation that:

    Feminism has mutated so much, from a simple “women should be able to do what they want” to “YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING THAT MIGHT BE REMOTELY STEREOTYPICAL FOR A WOMAN TO DO.”

    She’s right. I’d like to consider myself a feminist, but I do not want to be associated with the connotation of the term. I have always supported the notion of “do what you want to do, what makes you happy.” When I got married, I didn’t change my last name to his. Why should I? I love my last name. It connects me to a wonderful family, and to the amazing matriarch of the whole clan who died a couple of years ago at the age of 101.

    Part of doing what I love is feeling “sexy.” I’m 37 years old with two kids. There are many times when I need to know others think I’m sexy to make me feel good about myself, because many times I feel anything but sexy. The question is, why should I feel this need to have others notice me in a sexual way? Is that against feminism? I don’t think so. I like to feel good about myself because I work hard at trying to look good. I take care of my skin, my hair, my body… so when other people compliment me, especially young men, it makes me feel great, and my husband usually gets rewarded when I feel great.

    What does any of this have to do with pole dancing? Well, if it’s what you want, even if it makes you feel sexy, it can’t be a bad thing! Since when does sexy and “raunch” have to be male traits? Women want raunch just as much as men, and that isn’t always a bad thing! When women are in total control of their bodies, in my mind that supports the feminist ideal.

    Go ahead and pole dance! And maybe your boyfriend wouldn’t mind peeking in on a lesson or two. If you’re fine with it, you’re doing nothing wrong.

    Now if your boyfriend were hassling you to go to lessons and you weren’t comfortable with it, I’d tell you not to do it because it isn’t what you want. Instead, it’s your friend asking, you’re interested, so go! Take pictures of your bruises. :-)

    <3 tee tee · Aug 1, 01:00 AM · #

  28. Feminism has mutated so much, from a simple “women should be able to do what they want” to “YOU CAN’T DO ANYTHING THAT MIGHT BE REMOTELY STEREOTYPICAL FOR A WOMAN TO DO.”

    so true, yoko!
    gala, i agree wholeheartedly with your philosophy. i don’t have the energy to get involved in sweeping political statements if i’m not happy in myself!
    re: poledancing – i’d love to try it, but i have absolutely zero upper body strength. i’d have to hit the gym and lift some weights before i tried to heft my awkward body up a pole (going up a flight of stairs is an effort most days.)
    xoxo

    <3 sophie~ · Aug 1, 02:35 AM · #

  29. Nadia – I agree, ‘Female Chauvinist Pigs’ was very frightening and angered me a lot. Not the book itself, I mean the issues it explored. More people should read it.

    Eternity – Hooray for you and your fellow opposers! I think you have a very excellent reason for opposing the class as it is being proposed. I also get very angry at the health and wellness teachers at my school who tell women in their classes to eat right because ‘men like women with meat on them.’ You should encourage them to eat healthier because it’s best for their health! It should have nothing to do with other people’s perceptions. Blargh.

    If you find a class to take, Gala, I hope you have fun :) I wouldn’t take a pole-dancing class because I think all that spinning would make me sick, haha. Just riding merry-go-rounds can make me queasy.

    <3 Batopus · Aug 1, 03:44 AM · #

  30. I had a friend who had poles in her basement, and one day she invited a bunch of people over for a pole dancing party. We were all just kind of goofing around, spinning and everything, but the next day I DEFINITELY felt it. It’s an incredible ab workout – and I didn’t even know what I was doing!

    <3 Posey · Aug 1, 04:30 AM · #

  31. i’ve ALWAYS wanted to pole dancing because pole dancers are really fit and have lots of muscles and i really wanted to give it a go but my friends all told me that it was degrading and so i never did it.
    thanks for posting this.

    <3 admireme · Aug 1, 04:32 AM · #

  32. Nadia – You’re right, it IS a frightening and illuminating book. I didn’t mean to downplay the importance of the book. While I didn’t agree with everything, the book brought up a lot of interesting and important points I had never considered before. It’s definitely a worthwhile read.

    <3 yoko · Aug 1, 04:56 AM · #

  33. Bada BING!

    <3 Lou · Aug 1, 07:20 AM · #

  34. I love the idea of pole-dancing. I’ve never been to a class but a club I used to go to had a pole, and it was really fun (fortunately, it was a small club filled with friends of mine – otherwise I don’t think I would have been so bold).

    Another thing that I’ve enjoyed is belly-dancing. I’ve been taking classes and that is definitely an awesome workout. And the plus side is that I don’t have to install a pole in the bedroom in order to show off my new moves to my husband :)

    <3 Meg · Aug 1, 07:28 AM · #

  35. My best friend asked me if I wanted to take a class with her and I thought it looked fun until one day we were on the bus and some girl was talking so loudly about her pole dancing classes.

    You know those types who need attention so badly they have to literally scream for it and they talk about personal things on public transportation like they have an enthralled audience? Her friend was sitting right next to her but she kept screaming about pole dancing classes so that everyone could hear it.

    “It’s SUUUCH a great workout and I mean it’s SEXXXXual but not like Slutttttyyyyy sexual youknowwhatimean it’s like LIIIIIberating and SOOOO fun. I’m so flexxxible now and my boyfriends says the SEX has gotten WAY HOTTER now that I’m more Comfortable about my BODY.”

    That’s when I decided that pole dancing class would be fun if I could take lessons alone, but if it’s going to be a class full of douches like that hyperexhibitionist, it would be too annoying for words. Ha.

    <3 Julie · Aug 1, 09:13 AM · #

  36. It makes me really sad when people don’t want to identify as feminists because of its “negative associations.” For me, I want to provide a positive, reasonable example of what a feminist is. I want to change the negative stereotype of the man-hating, “all sex is rape” school of feminism, so I make sure that I associate myself with the feminist movement along more balanced terms.

    We all agree that feminism is a good thing, right? So get out there and live your views! And if people ask, say, “hell yes, I’m a feminist!” so that feminism gets the reputation it deserves.

    <3 Nadia · Aug 1, 10:51 AM · #

  37. Oh, Gala, you have to do it ! Especially so I can live vicariously through you ! I would lovelovelove to take up pole dancing, but as a fifteen year old I just don’t think it’s possible for me right now. Also, I’m not sure my mother would go for it. She didn’t have too much of a problem with me telling her one day I wanted to be a burlesque dancer [although, she did throw money at me everytime I walked by for a week] but I’m not sure a POLE dancer would go over well.

    <3 Lesly · Aug 1, 01:09 PM · #

  38. Nadia – to everything you’ve said here, I can only say: WORD.

    I get so irritated when people refuse to identify as feminists because of some negative stereotypes they have picked up from other people and the media. The thing that a lot of people don’t understand is that feminism is a pretty diverse movement and that a) there are a lot of different voices and opinions b)feminists are allowed and supposed to criticise each other and share their thoughts. It’s like in this article/review (which made me laugh, too) – http://www.thefword.org.uk/reviews/2007/06/big_sister

    <3 Eternity · Aug 1, 01:19 PM · #

  39. I’d like to second the ‘word’ to everything Nadia has said. And that article’s a great read! I liked the response about changing your name when you get married — that the name (most!!!) women are born with is just their father’s name anyway.

    <3 Annabel · Aug 2, 02:15 PM · #

  40. Its one of those things that requires ALOT of practice. Now, first, I DON’T DANCE. I’m really sensitive about being overtly sexual, and combining that with dancing is just plain scary! But….

    I work at a Strip Bar as a bartender, and during my breaks (‘cause I quit smoking, I needed something to do), one of the dancers started to teach me.

    It requires alot of upper body strength, but you get used to it, and it also tones EVERYTHING in a matter of weeks, so its well worth it for the fitness benefits. Its also fun, and you feel like you’ve done a good workout afterward.

    You also feel VERY accomplished when you can flip yourself upside down ;)

    The thing is, Pole classes and things like that dont have to be raunchy. The raunchy part is the stripper part, and even then, i’ve seen some strippers be AMAZING at pole work, and not be sexual, just graceful, and beautiful. Like all things of this type, it works both ways, it just depends on the viewer/dancer/whoever.

    Link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u6KnUW9N3Zo , is what i’m talking about.

    (And apologies for the large rant)

    <3 Rose · Aug 2, 07:17 PM · #

  41. There are so many well thought-out points here that I couldn’t POSSIBLY begin to respond to each & every one of them! Plus, all of you speak a little bit of truth which has tugged at my thinking about pole-dancing, so I don’t know if anything I could say would add anything!

    I just wanted to THANK all of you for making such thoughtful, positive, respectful, awesome comments & for being so great in general! I am so impressed. Woaahh, feel the love ;D !

    <3 Gala · Aug 3, 12:54 AM · #

  42. OH MY GOSH
    i completely agree with your “Do what makes you happy” philosophy

    If being a whore pleases you, is satisfactory, and will support you, GO FOR IT!
    I also thought pole-dancing might be fun – maybe i’ll try it sometime
    :)

    <3 Kat · Dec 28, 06:12 PM · #

  43. I actually took the Pole dancing class ,
    and i absolutely LOVED it.
    Its really fun, and good execrise too !
    You realy should try it. Its awesome

    <3 izzy · Apr 17, 05:09 AM · #
 

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