Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

My office is in disarray. Next week, the roof is going to be ripped right off and systematically replaced.

There are no coincidences: I’m going through my Saturn return, and I feel like I’m prying the roof off everything in my life. I’m fossicking through the attic and getting my hands dirty in the basement, so it all makes sense. I’m deep into the process of figuring out all the pieces and how they fit.

So in addition to taking stock of my spiritual and mental life, it seems natural that such a huge part of my physical life — my office, where I spend 90% of my time — is being uprooted too.

As much as I am dreading packing up the contents of this room, I’m choosing to see it as a positive thing, and an opportunity to give the room a complete makeover. No huge surprise, then, that I’ve been daydreaming about my new digs!

I’ve wanted to romp with rolls of wallpaper for the longest time, but since we rent, permanent wallpaper is out of the question. Thankfully these days there are trillions of options for temporary wallpaper, and really cool stuff, too. When I stumbled upon Spoonflower last week, I was instantly smitten… And now I just can’t choose! At only $60 a roll, they are majorly affordable, and so damn cute!

I have a major case of wallpaper madness. It’s like space madness, but more vertical.

Here are some of my favourite designs… And some imaginary babes that might have bought ’em, stuck ’em up, and made them a part of their home!

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: La Dolce Vita. Intent on nurturing her inner coquette, when she’s at home she wears hand-dyed vintage slips and gold slippers. She creates floral mandalas on the floor and chants all the time.

Right: Pois D’Aquarelle. Too many episodes of America’s Next Top Model later, she decided the two things her apartment absolutely needed were a runway and a mirror ball. She practices her fiercest walk every morning, and smizes for an invisible audience.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Watercolor Dots Magenta. This girl’s house is full of brightly-coloured kitchen appliances… Not that she knows how to use them. She paints every fingernail a different colour, and practices throwing M&Ms in the air before catching them in her mouth.

Right: Winter Magnolia. She likes to lie on her chaise longue in a fluffy white petticoat and eat marshmallow fluff right out of the jar. Whenever it rains, she makes a point to turn off anything with a screen, and just engage with the real world for a change.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Cousin Oiseau Rose. She bought this wallpaper while under the influence, and squints at it every morning. After her first coffee of the day, however, she’s able to enjoy it a little more, and laughs at how insanely bright it is.

Right: Sac Poupée Russe V Rose. She gives tarot readings at her kitchen table, and draped velvet and tulle between the corners of her ceiling, giving it the feel of a mystical circus tent. She never wears shoes and ties strings of bells around her ankles, so people can always hear her coming.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Peacock Pattern Dots Pink. When she went wallpaper shopping, her boyfriend told her this one creeped him out: that it looked more like spying eyes than peacock feathers. They broke up a week later, and she ordered a roll immediately. When she walks past the wall in the mornings, she lets her fingers dance along the pattern, and smiles.

Right: Branches. She hung an immense mosquito net around her bed and wished she would never have to leave it. By way of compromise, she decided to conduct all business from bed: writing emails, eating her meals, and taking guests, too.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Love Letters Pink. Every Friday night, she glued glitter to her eyelids and prowled the city, looking for girls to bat her long lashes at. When she was successful, she would make them French toast the next morning and kiss their elbows, but never tell them her real name.

Right: Wide Red And Pink Chevron. She glues cat-shaped decals onto her fingernails and purrs when she answers the door. She installed a photobooth in her house so that everyone who visited could be documented… Even impatient Fedex dudes and shy delivery boys.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Dictionary Page With Birds On Wire. She reads dictionaries for fun, and tries to use a new word every day. She wonders if people might think her implacable, cantankerous or impudent. Well, maybe they would if they had her vocabulary.

Right: Watercolour White Doilies. Even though she had travelled far and wide, met the Dalai Lama and obtained her Master’s degree, her favourite thing to do was close her eyes, hold out her arms and spin in circles.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: J’adore Paris. She had never left Idaho but filled her home with any- and everything Paris: her bookcase was littered with books by Anais Nin and Henry Miller and Flaubert and teeny tiny statuettes of the Eiffel Tower, she bought herself macarons once a week and practised her conversational Français with the owner of her local bakery.

Right: Feather Chevron Turquoise. She wished she could live her whole life horizontal, floating. Would it be possible to fill her entire studio apartment with mattresses and cushions? She hoped one day she would date a magician and learn to levitate.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Peonies Ink. Her fingernails are caked with pastels, her wrists flecked with watercolours. She keeps pencils, bulldog clips and paintbrushes stashed in her unbrushed curls. She is always making delightful messes: when she bakes bread, she showers the kitchen with flour; when she eats, vinegar flicks from the edges of her salad, and she grins.

Right: Medium Navy Chevron. The wall beside her front door is covered in mirrors of all different shapes and sizes. Sometimes she spends an hour dancing in front of them, chewing bubblegum, applying and reapplying bright pink lip gloss, and listening to Lil Wayne.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Blueming Flowers. She grows flowers on every shelf, every windowsill, and in every nook and cranny of her home. She crushes lavender flowers and stuffs them inside her pillowcase, she sprinkles rose petals in her bath, and grows lemons for gin and tonics in a pot beside the couch.

Right: Madame Fancypantaloons’ Instant Library Bindings. A bookworm since birth, she always has a stack of storybooks beside her. She goes through phases, but right now, she’s obsessed with reading about grisly crimes. She replaces the dust jackets with self-help titles so as not to upset her mother when she comes to visit.

Watercolour Polka-Dots And Cherry Blossom Branches: A Pox On White Walls!

Left: Love Letter. She had taken to wearing red lipstick every day, even when she wasn’t planning on leaving the house. It made her feel better about life, and gave her a sense of power and fortitude.

Right: Watercolor Chevron. It makes her eyes hurt… But she loves it.

Are you as obsessed with these as I am?! Honestly, how are you ever supposed to choose one design?! Impossible! (Although, if you have a STRONG FEELING about one I must stick to my wall, feel free to let me know about it!)

Oh, another amazing thing about Spoonflower is that if you have your own designs you’d like to make a reality, they offer that service, too! And if you’re not quite ready to commit to a roll of wallpaper, you can purchase the designs as giftwrap. Genius!

Pretty cool. And P.S., I was not paid to say this. I just think it is the best idea ever!

Much love from this mind spinning with options,

Title image from Tim Walker. You should buy his book, too!