Your most powerful weapon in the war against self-loathing is something you are going to create for yourself. You are going to take a blank book & fill its pages with truth, with beauty & with love. The further that you go in your radical self love journey, the more you will realise that all the answers come from within yourself. Great thinkers, writers, philosophers & hairdressers can all give you wonderful ideas & morsels to chew over — but the way you assimilate them will be entirely personal, & it’s for this reason that I say everyone should have a radical self love bible. It’s your way of noting your progress & reminding yourself of the simple truths which make your world a happier place to be.

One of the best reasons for creating a radical self bible is to localise all your genius. I’m serious! Especially in the time of the internet, we’re all so overloaded with information — & constantly learning new tips, tricks & lessons — that it can be easy to lose track of it all. I don’t know about you, but my memory isn’t the best. Sometimes, it seems like I have to learn (&/or repeat mistakes) multiple times before the message sinks in.

Why is that? Well, the reason is that — as I said earlier — we all assimilate information differently. You can tell someone something a million times, & then someone else will come along & their way of putting it ignites a big fire in your mind. When you write down the lessons you’ve learned with a personal slant, they become more powerful, & more potent.

Back to the bible. There are no rules. It is a free-form experiment, & you’ll make it up as you go along. To start with, I’ll give you some guidance, & then you’ll learn how to fly on your own.

Everyone’s radical self love bible is totally different, & that’s precisely what makes them so magical, so wonderful. Think of it as a journal crossed with a book of shadows, a top-secret toolkit to help you pull you out of any slump, & a scribbled devotional to your own magnificence.

It is something to put positive energy & intention into. You can write your secrets, goals, hopes & wishes. You can write about what you’re afraid of — & dissect it so the fear no longer controls you. You can disassemble old patterns & break disempowering habits.

It is something precious & sacred. I would recommend that you never show it to anyone else, & write it with that in mind. The problem with writing is that even the idle thought of a someday audience will alter the structure & form & essential bones of what you’re putting down on paper. It will warp your words, & the idea is to make this as true & real an expression of yourself as possible. So don’t show it to anyone else. Keep it private, keep it personal. This way, you won’t be afraid of admitting things out loud.

As for picking the right book: you can use anything which speaks to you. Some girls will choose a soft-covered Moleskine, while others will prefer a small ring-binder. The only criteria is that you need to able to write inside it, & it helps to be able to stick pictures in there too. We are visual creatures, so the more optical stimulation the better!

I like to use A4-sized books with hard black covers & enormous sheets of blank white paper inside. I love to operate on paper without lines or constraints. You can write sideways, upside down, & tape huge pictures onto the pages. It’s my favourite way to work.

But like I said, it’s up to you. Go to a stationery or art supply store & run your hands over the blank books. Pick something which hums with promise. Then take it home & make it your own.